Pillow Doubletalk

By Dave Songer (songer@aloha.net)

Summary: It's Lois and Clark's wedding night, and Clark has to disappear again! What kind of cheesy excuse can he give Lois this time? :-)



The day had been quite eventful. The long awaited wedding of Lois Lane and Clark Kent had finally come to pass. The morning proved to be very nerve racking for both Lois and Clark. Clark's best man, Jimmy Olsen, had been sick most of the night, and Lucy Lane, the Maid of Honor, had been in a car accident. However, by midday things had fallen into place. Lois and her bridesmaids had gone to the beauty salon and had their hair done, while the groom, best man, and the rest of the bridal party had checked into their tuxedos and gone on to the church. It was quite a lavish wedding which made Clark feel uncomfortable since he was somewhat of a low key guy, but he managed to get through it unscathed. As he and Lois checked into the Lexor Hotel, he found himself trying to recall the wedding ceremony. He remembered hearing Lois say, "I do," but the only other thing he could recall was the priest saying, "you may now kiss the bride." On the other hand, Lois could remember every detail. She remembered her dad telling her how extremely proud he was and how her eyes swelled up with tears when her mom had told her she was even happier than the day Lois was born. She remembered dancing with Perry White at the reception, and she could recall everything Jimmy wore down to his socks!


Chapter 1

After checking in at the front desk, the bride and groom went up to the Honeymoon Suite. Clark opened the door and then scooped Lois up and carried her across the threshold, setting her down inside the room.

"Well we finally did it, Lois, do you think you'll be happy as Mrs. Clark Kent?" the groom asked apprehensively.

"Oh, I don't know…do you think you'll be satisfied as Mr. Lois Lane?" chuckled the bride. The two of them walked around the room to get themselves acclimated.

"Clark? What time is our flight tomorrow night?" Lois queried.

"Six o'clock, Lois."

"I've never been to Borneo, Clark. What will we do there for two weeks?"

"I'm sure we'll think of something, Lois…we always do," Clark replied. They wandered into the bedroom as their curiosity got the better of them.

"Remember the last time we were here, Lois? You never let me have my turn in the bedroom."

"Yeah…and I said 'that will give you something to look forward too, when you meet the right girl.'" Clark looked over at Lois from across the room, and their eyes met momentarily.

"I think I found the right girl," he responded before looking away. Lois smiled and looked around for something to talk about.

"Do you think Superman can take care of things here while we're gone, Clark?" Lois asked. Clark hesitated for a moment. He was trying to forget about the fact that he hadn't told her about his secret identity. He had tried several times to tell her the week before they were married, but there didn't seem to be a good time to bring it up. They were always so busy running around with last minute details that he never got around to mentioning it. How could he possibly keep his alter identity a secret from his wife? Several thoughts raced through his mind. Would she be angry? What if she was upset? Perhaps she would be elated? Perhaps not.

"Clark? Did you hear me? I asked if you think Superman can take care of Metropolis while we're on our honeymoon."

"I guess so, Lois," he blurted.

"What's wrong, Clark? Was it something I said?" she murmured. Clark straightened himself up and walked over toward Lois.

"Can't we just forget about Superman for once?" Clark pleaded. Clark had hoped Lois would realize that she hit a nerve bringing up the subject of Superman on their wedding night. It would only serve as a painful reminder that he had not told her his secret yet.

"Alright…I'm sorry…what shall we talk about?" Lois warmly responded.

"Well, how about I go and use the shower? I'm all sweated up," Clark suggested.

"Okay, I'm going to call my folks and see if they got back to their hotel room okay," Lois answered. Clark was gone for about twenty minutes. During that time Lois had called her parents as well as Lucy to thank them all for their help in putting together the wedding. It wasn't long after Lois hung up the phone on Lucy that Clark reappeared. Lois sat there admiring the symmetry of his body. Clark saw Lois staring at him and shyly smiled as Lois turned away in embarrassment.

"Well…" Lois said.

"Well, here we are," Clark replied.

"Yes, here we are," Lois continued. For several moments they hesitated, Clark wasn't sure how he should proceed…he had never spent the night with Lois and so he felt awkward…he just hoped Lois didn't notice his uncomfortability because he wanted this evening to be perfect.

"Do you want to use the shower, Lois?" Clark offered.

"Why…is there an odor emanating from me?" She asked.

"Why no, Lois. I just thought…well…I thought you might feel more refreshed after such a long day," Clark responded.

"I'm just teasing you Clark…I'd love to take a shower." As soon as Lois disappeared into the bathroom, Clark called his parents who were staying at his place.

"Hi Mom, how are you and dad?" Clark inquired.

"Clark! Whatever are you doing calling your father and me on your wedding night?" Martha questioned.

"Oh Mom, I don't know what to do!" Clark pleaded.

"Why, Clark, it's a little late for that, isn't it?" she giggled.

"MOM! That's not what I meant. I still haven't told Lois about Superman," Clark spouted.

"Oh, I see. Well, are you going to tell her tonight?" Martha asked.

"I don't know, mom…I don't want to take the chance of ruining her wedding night. I mean, what if she's not happy with it. What if she gets upset. I don't want to ruin this day for her. I think I'll wait until after we come back from the honeymoon," Clark replied.

"Well, it's your decision, Clark…your father and I will go along with whatever you decide," she offered.

"Thanks, mom…and thanks for your help with the wedding. We couldn't have pulled it off without you."

"That's okay, Clark…that's what parents are for," Martha answered.

"Tell Dad, thanks…thanks for being there," Clark responded.

"I will son…now go find your wife and make us both proud grandparents," Martha insisted.

"MOM! Please…we're not ready for that yet," Clark answered.

"Okay son…love you…good night," Martha sounded. When Clark hung up the phone, he noticed that the water in the shower had stopped. He was concentrating on the phone call so much that he didn't hear Lois turn off the water. Clark was lying down on the bed while his head was propped up by a pillow that rested against the headboard. When Lois came out of the bathroom, Clark noticed she had her men's silk pajamas on. Lois went over to the opposite side of the bed and sat down. She smiled at Clark, looked away, and then returned her gaze.

"I'm sorry Clark, I didn't mean to bring up Superman earlier."

"That's okay, Lois. I shouldn't have been so quick to snap at you over it. I'm sorry, too," Clark insisted. Lois leaned across the bed and gently kissed Clark on the cheek. She then propped herself up on the bed in the same position as Clark. She noticed that it was getting dark outside.

"Clark?" Lois asked.

"Yes, Lois?" Clark replied.

"Doesn't it all seem like a dream? I mean, I keep thinking I'm going to wake up and this will all just be a memory."

"I know, it does feel kind of weird, doesn't it, Lois?" Clark said quizzically. Their eyes met again and there was a momentary hesitation before they leaned over to each other. Clark was about to kiss her when his special hearing picked up a cry for help. Suddenly he stopped, inches from Lois's face. Lois didn't notice Clark's sudden stop right away since her eyes were closed. Then when he spoke, she opened them.

"Lois, I just remembered something, I forgot to tip the bellboy. I'll be right back…don't move." Lois's jaw dropped. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. They weren't even married twenty-four hours and he was already coming up with excuses for slipping away.

"You can't be serious!" Lois snapped.

"Please Lois, I'll be right back…I just don't feel right about not tipping the boy," Clark pleaded.

"Why can't you tip him tomorrow?" she responded.

"Because Lois, we might forget…I'll be back in a flash." Clark went to the closet, pulled out a duffle bag, and proceeded toward the door.

"Aren't you going to take your wallet, Clark?"

"I have my money in the duffle bag, Lois," Clark replied.

"You really are strange, Clark. Well hurry up." Clark went out the door and down the hall. After locating the men's room he quickly changed into Superman. He hid the duffle bag in the maintenance room, and sped towards the open window at the end of the hall, leaping into the dark night.


It was about thirty minutes before Superman returned. He had come across a tractor trailer which had overturned, trapping it's driver inside the cab. After restoring the tractor to it's original position, and freeing the driver, he had stayed a few moments talking to police and receiving praises from the grateful driver before realizing Lois would be getting suspicious. After saying his fond farewells he journeyed back to the Lexor Hotel. When he re-entered the Honeymoon Suite, Lois was sitting at the edge of the bed, next to the phone. Clark wondered if Lois had inquired at the front desk as to his whereabouts.

"Is everything okay, Lois? Clark inquired.

"Everything's fine," Lois said in a choppy voice. "Did you find the bellboy?" Clark hesitated for a moment because he couldn't tell if Lois was quizzing him or whether she was genuinely curious.

"Actually no, Lois. I looked everywhere but couldn't find him. I think I overheard someone at the front desk say his shift was over.

"I see," Lois answered. "That's too bad. Maybe we can look for him tomorrow?"

"Good idea," Clark spouted. "I think I'll just put this away and use the bathroom for a second." Clark opened the closet and dropped his duffle bag inside before heading into the bathroom and shutting the door behind him.

"HA…that'll be the day he can pull one over on me!" Lois muttered to herself. Lois walked over to the closet where Clark had deposited the duffle bag. She knew there was something strange about Clark's story because she had called the front desk, and they verified that the bellboy who carried their luggage up to the Honeymoon Suite had been in the lobby ever since. Clark would certainly have seen him had he been to the front desk, but she knew there was something strange there too because the front desk said they hadn't seen her husband since he checked in.


Lois reached down and slid the closet door open enough to reveal the duffle bag. She knelt down and opened it. Everything looked okay, so what was the mystery about? There didn't appear to be anything unusual about the duffle bag. Lois picked it up and shook it a few times but that didn't seem to reveal anything either. Lois was about to put the duffle bag back in the closet and write the whole thing off as a misunderstanding when she noticed that the bottom of the duffle bag had an additional zipper. She slowly pulled the zipper down and reached inside. When she pulled her hand out, there was some clothing that was wrapped up neatly. She looked at the clothing strangely before beginning to unravel it. When she held it up, her eyes grew wide in disbelief. It was a blue costume with a red cape and a large yellow "S" on the chest area. Lois reached into the bottom of the bag again and pulled out two red foldaway boots. Her head began to race. What was Clark doing with Superman's costume? Why was he gone for thirty minutes when the lobby was only a few minutes away? Why hadn't they seen Clark at the front desk? She refused to believe the logical explanation. Yet, what if Clark was Superman? He had deceived her all this time. He lied to keep her from finding out the truth. HE LIED! Lois began to breath harder. She clenched her fists. He married her pretending to be Clark when all along he was Superman. She could see people laughing at her saying, "How could you marry the guy and not know who he really is…how stupid are you?" The anger was really taking control of her now as she gritted her teeth.


Clark splashed some water on his face and dried it off with a towel. He was feeling quite refreshed, and anxious to return to Lois. He opened the door and stepped out into the bedroom. Clark just caught a glimpse of something coming in his direction and managed to duck in time as a vase when flying passed his head only to crash on the wall next to him.

"LOIS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Clark yelled as a tray went sailing past him.

"YOU LYING PIECE OF SLIME! I COULD KILL YOU, CLARK…OR SHOULD I CALL YOU SUPERMAN?" Lois blurted. This was too much for Clark. How could she have guessed since he hadn't mentioned anything and he still hadn't removed his glasses?

"Lois, what are you talking about?" Clark inquired.

"I called the front desk and your bellboy was there the whole time!" Lois responded.

"So? I just didn't see him I guess," Clark insisted. Lois began to clench her fists again.


"I'M NOT," Clark pleaded. "What are you talking about, Lois?" Lois had been keeping her hands out of sight behind her back, but Clark's responses were infuriating her. Suddenly she pulled her hands out from behind her back and flung the Superman costume at him.

"I'M TALKING ABOUT THIS, CLARK…I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU BEING SUPERMAN, I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU LYING TO ME AND DECEIVING ME ALL THIS TIME," Lois argued. Clark stood there with his mouth partly opened. He tried to formulate a response but nothing was coming out.

"Well, I'm waiting, Clark. I want you tell me you haven't been deceiving me all this time," She insisted. Clark looked around the room and tried to gather his thoughts. He hadn't bargained on Lois finding out this way, so he was at a loss for words. Lois's eyes began to fill with water and a tear fell down her cheek. When she spoke again, her voice was choppy.

"How can I ever trust you again, Clark? You lied to me. How could you do this?"

"I didn't lie, Lois…I just didn't volunteer the truth," Clark insisted.

"That doesn't justify what you did, Clark. You deceived me…I can never trust you again." Several tears flowed down her cheeks, as Lois tried to fight back the rush of tears that had caused her eyes to swell up with water.

"Lois, I…" Lois cut him off before he could finish.

"Don't say anything, Clark…I don't want to hear any more lies." Lois turned away from Clark and ran out of the bedroom sobbing.


(Chapter 2)

Clark sat there anguishing in the bedroom. It seemed like forever since Lois ran out of the bedroom sobbing upon learning his secret. He glanced at his watch and noticed only 30 minutes had passed. Slowly he got up, took a deep breath and walked out into the living room. The only visible light came from the full moon outside their window. He focused in on Lois who was lying on the couch, gazing out into the night. His sensitive ears picked up her sniffling and he could painfully see she had gone through almost an entire box of Kleenex tissues. Lois could sense Clark was in the room and broke the silence.


"Was it hard for you growing up, Clark?" She asked.

"Hard, Lois?" Clark inquired.

"Did it bother you that you were different…that you had to always hide your powers from everyone?" Lois asked while fighting back tears.

"Yes, I wanted to use my powers to help people, but I also wanted to be like everyone else…to be accepted. I never knew my real parents, but Mr. and Mrs. Kent took me in and raised my as if I was their own. I'm so lucky to have them…and you." Clark replied.

"Do I really have you, Clark?" Lois questioned. "Or am I to be part of the deception too, as part of your cover?" Clark went over to Lois and knelt down in front of her. He took her hands as their eyes met.

"No, Lois…this is the one real thing in the whole masquerade," Clark offered. "I've loved you from the moment I saw you standing there at Lex Luthor's ball. You didn't think much of me then, but I could feel something strange going on inside me; something wonderful."

As Lois's eyes drifted to the floor, Clark let go of her hands and with his right hand, gently lifted her chin so their eyes met again.

"Lois, I wanted to tell you but things just got out of hand," Clark continued. "I was worried that if you knew my secret, someone would kidnap you and try to blackmail me into doing something evil for them, in exchange for your safety."

Lois's eyes seemed to soften as Clark continued to hold up her chin. "Clark, I'm sorry I got upset with you. I do love you. I want us to be together and experience the joys of having a family." A tear came loose from Lois's eye and moved down her cheek.

"Forgive me, Lois…I apologize if I caused you any unnecessary pain," Clark whispered. Lois smiled and leaned forward so their lips met. Lois slid her arms up around Clark's neck and ran her fingers through his hair. For several moments they embraced before Clark slid his arms under Lois and lifted her from the couch. As Lois rested her head on his shoulder, Clark carried her into the bedroom and gently set her down on the bed. Their lips met again as Lois pulled Clark onto the bed with her. This kiss was more passionate than the one in the living room and Clark could feel the energy surging within him. Slowly, Lois pushed Clark down onto the pillow as their embrace lingered. After several moments, Lois leaned back up into a sitting position. She turned the table lamp off so that the only visible light was coming from the full moon. Clark couldn't help but notice how beautiful Lois looked as the moonlight enveloped her. She smiled and began to unbutton her silk pajama top. When she finished with the last button, their eyes met and Lois shyly looked away before letting the silk garment fall from her shoulders. Clark reached up with his right hand, turning Lois's face so that their eyes met again. As they both whispered "I love you," Lois slid down so their bodies met and they embraced once more in a passionate kiss. Clark gently turned Lois over on the bed as their bodies intertwined. Throughout the night they explored each other's body, gently kissing and caressing each other as they made love. Finally, Lois had fallen asleep from sheer exhaustion.



Clark was the first to open his eyes. The scent from Lois's hair filled his head as she rested comfortably in his arms. As he stretched out his arms she began to stir.

"I'm sorry, Lois…I didn't mean to wake you," Clark whispered with sincerity. Lois smiled warmly and gently squeezed him as she kissed his chest.

"I hope you weren't too disappointed in my…you know…performance last night?" She insisted.

"You were wonderful, Lois. I'm just sorry I didn't ask you to marry me sooner…to think I let us drift apart for so long." Lois climbed out of bed and wrapped one of the blankets around her. She walked toward the bathroom and then turned to face Clark.

"It seems to me I had to coax you a little to pop the question," she said with a touch of mischief. Lois entered the bathroom and then reemerged several moments later with a toothbrush in her mouth.

"Oh, by the way, Clark?" Lois asked with a smile. "Now that we're married, I think we should start saving our money, for a house."

"I think that's good, Lois," Clark replied. "As soon as we get back from our honeymoon we can discuss it some more."

"Actually, Clark…I thought we could start with the money we put aside for the airfare to Borneo."

"Lois, what about the honeymoon?" Clark pleaded.

"Well, since you're Superman…there really is no need for us to travel by plane; you can fly us there…unless of course you're still exhausted from last night?" She giggled. Clark smiled back at Lois and chuckled at her line of questioning.

"Lois, we weren't going to fly until tonight…what did you have in mind for today?" Clark inquired. Lois reemerged from the bathroom and went over to Clark's side of the bed and sat down beside him. Gently she unwrapped the towel and let it slide from her shoulders.

"Perhaps we better take the plane after all, Clark," Lois suggested as she leaned down to kiss him. "I don't think you're going to have much energy left by this evening."