By Lara-Elaine Koch <73764.2611@compuserve.com>
Summary: Clark had summoned the courage to tell Lois his big secret, but she did not take it at all well. In fact, she told him she never wanted to see him again. Now that Lois discovers Clark has packed up and left town, she is bitterly sorry.
This is not my first attempt at FANFIC, but it is the first time I have actually sent one in. I would appreciate any comments or suggestions you could give me, Lara Koch, 73764.2611@compuserve.com
***
Lois raised her hand to the door, her face tear-stricken. She knocked very lightly.
"Clark … Clark Kent, I know you're in there. Open the door, we need to talk," she said, her voice cracking. She looked into the dark apartment, and saw it was empty. She reached down to the doorknob, and found that it turned. She stepped in, and gasped. It was completely bare, there was no evidence that Clark Kent had ever resided there. She started to cry again, this time letting her tears flow freely. She was about to turn around when she spotted a manila envelope on the mantelpiece. On it was written simply Lois. She walked over to it very slowly, afraid to touch it. She opened it. Inside was a picture that had been taken of them. Lois was looking up at Clark, and she had obviously been laughing. Clark looked just as happy. Inside also was a letter. Lois sat down on the floor and began to read.
My Beloved Lois,
By the time you read this, if you read this, I'll be far away, which should please you. I'm sure you don't want to know where I'm going, just as long as it is as far as possible from you, as you stated to me last week. I just wanted you to know that I never meant to hurt you. That would be the last thing I would ever want to do. You know very well that I couldn't tell you sooner. You loved the man in the cape, which was not me. I needed to know if you loved the real man, Clark Kent. And when you finally did, I was the happiest man in the world. So, I knew that I could disclose my deepest secret in the world to you. There was no way you could NOT be mad, I lied to you, and I am aware of that. There was never a second where I didn't want to tell you. From the moment I first saw you, I knew you would be the woman that I would fall hopelessly in love with. And as we started to grow closer, it hurt me so much not being able to tell you. And it hurt watching you get mad at me every time you would start confessing something to me, and I had to run off and save someone. You have no idea what it is like watching your face fall, and I was the one causing it. I love you, Lois, and I will never stop loving you even after I die, if I ever do. I just want you to be happy, and if me leaving you was the only way you could, that is what I'll do.
Yours Always,
Clark
Lois was sobbing now. She clutched the letter to her chest, her tears falling on the picture. How could she have gotten so furious with him? He tried to tell her this, but she wouldn't listen. How could she be so selfish? She had lost the love of her life, and she had no idea where he went. She would have given anything to be with him now, to hold him and tell him that she was sorry. She now knew that her life had lost all meaning. She got up, and went home.
"Chief, what's wrong with Lois?" Jimmy Olsen asked, walking into Perry White's office. Perry stood and walked over to Jimmy. Lois was at her desk, her hands poised over the keyboard. She wasn't really looking at anything, she was staring straight ahead.
"Lois did something terrible, son, she did something no man or woman should ever do. Yet we all do it, every day. Lois fell desperately in love, and then told whoever she loved that she never wanted to see him again."
"It's CK, isn't it. That's why he left," Jimmy replied, and Perry nodded. "Is there anything we can do to help her?"
Perry shook his head. "She'll just have to work this out by herself. At the banquet on Friday, you and I will just have to make her feel like she's loved."
Jimmy nodded. Perry gave him one last pat on the back, and sent him on his way.
Clark sighed. He was at his parent's house, sitting among his furniture that was in the barn. He was heartbroken. He just wished that Lois had read his letter. Jonathan Kent made his way into the barn. He sat on a bail of hay next to his son.
"Son, you have to get over her, if you're not going back," he said.
"Dad, I'll never be able to get over her. I knew she would get mad, but Dad, you should have seen her. She said she hated me, and wished I was out of her life forever. I thought it wouldn't last that long, but she sent everything that I had at her house back to mine. She wouldn't even look at me in the Planet."
"Clark, either way you would have told her. Imagine what would have happened if you had waited until after you proposed, or after you got married, or if Lois had to find out herself when one day she found her baby levitating out of the crib? It wouldn't be right, son. You had to tell her before the relationship had gotten any more serious."
Clark sniffed and nodded. "You're right, dad. I just wish I could go back and tell her differently, so she wouldn't hate me. I just wish—"
"Clark, its obvious that you love Lois more than anything on earth. If you love her that much, go back and talk to her. Maybe you can work something out. Even if you just go back to being friends."
Clark pondered this for a minute. "There is a Daily Planet banquet this Friday. Maybe I can go and Lois and I can talk."
"Good, son. You do that. I'm sure everything will work out," Jonathan said, patting his son on the shoulder and walking away.
"I just wish I could be as sure as you," Clark replied softly.
Everything Lois saw reminded her of Clark. Her computer, her car, even herself. She couldn't go to sleep, she just kept thinking about all the times she and Clark had cuddled up on the couch and watched movies, or all the times where Clark had held her and kissed her, and ran his fingers through her hair. He had made her feel like she had never felt before. He had loved her, which she couldn't say for most of the men that had been in her life. She was going to go crazy if she had stayed in the house any longer, so she decided to go to the Daily Planet banquet that was that evening. Perry had given her the day off, so she went out to buy a dress. She settled on a long, red one. She got her hair done in tight curls that framed her face. When she got home, she got dressed and looked sadly into the mirror. She pictured Clark beside her, dressed in a black suit, one of his stray curls falling in his face. She turned to smile up at him, but he was gone. Her eyes filled with tears as she gathered her purse and strode out the door.
The banquet was beautiful. It was held at a hall, with chandeliers and marble walls. It was packed. Clark made his way through the crowd, until finally he spotted Perry and Jimmy.
"CK!" Jimmy called, walking up to him. He grinned, but Jimmy could see how hurt he was. "What are you doing here?"
"I couldn't let my friends down, could I?" Clark said. "Say.. is, uh, Lois here?"
Perry walked up beside Jimmy. "Not yet, son, but she did say she was coming." He walked closer to Clark. "Talk to her son, she is so love sick she can't do her job."
Clark sighed. He would have to talk to her, wouldn't he? Oh, but he would have given anything to see her, to hold her. Jimmy walked away to talk to some people, and Perry glided out onto the dance room floor with his wife, Alice. Clark stood there by himself, until he spotted Lois walking through the door. Clark suppressed a gasp. She looked absolutely gorgeous, more beautiful than he had ever seen her. But her face looked so hurt, so lost. She walked over to a table and sat down. Wary people kept their distance. Clark sighed gain. Why had he done this to her? He kept staring at her, until she looked up and saw him.
Lois wanted to cry, this time because she was so happy. There was Clark. He looked as sad as a puppy that had just gotten its tail stepped on, but there he was. She stood up. She wanted to run to him, but all she did was slowly walk in his direction. Clark also began walking. They met in the center of the dance floor, where they were about three inches apart. He looked ready to cry. She collapsed into his arms, her head resting on his chest. He stroked her hair.
"I'm sorry, Clark."
"For what?" he asked.
"For everything. I never want to leave your arms again," she cried.
"That's good, because I'm never going to let you go," Clark said, smiling a little. She raised her head and looked at him.
"I love you, Clark. I always have, and I always will," she said softly.
"I love you too, Lois. More than anything," Clark replied, and he kissed her very softly. She put her arms around his neck, and they began swaying to the music, lost in each others eyes.
"You'll never leave me again, Clark? You'll hold me forever?" she asked.
"Forever, Lois. Forever and a day."
THE END
(4ever.txt)