Unforgettable

By Julie Gastler (juliegastler@gmail.com)

Rating: PG-13

Submission Date: July 2019

Summary: When Lois danced at her anniversary party, she never
expected it to be the eye-opening experience it became. Now, Lois
finds herself tasked with putting the pieces back together. Will
Lois and Clark be able to unravel the truth, move past everything
that has happened and reconstruct their lives?

Story Size: 110,408 words (614Kb as text)

Author's Notes: While the story starts later, it interrupts the
flow at the beginning of Ultrawoman BEFORE the red kryptonite
laser which, along with the rest of the following episodes, never
happened. You might also find it helpful to note that our villain
is responsible for any other time inconsistencies, not me.

Disclaimer: I do not own most of these characters and I borrowed
them and some of their stories from the wonderful people who made
the show. I also borrowed some song lyrics from the wonderful Nat
King Cole (though some of the songs were originally written by
others too). And I thank them all for allowing me to go on this
crazy adventure. Any characters not from the show came out of my
head and any resemblance to actual people is coincidental. I also
edited some real places to fit my story better, in case you
intend to be offended by that.

Special thanks to my family for putting up with me while I tried
to write this in one month (plus all the extra time past that
because it just wasn't done yet), my friends for having to
constantly hear about it, and complete strangers that are now
friends who had bits of advice when I asked questions (which was
very often. A special thanks to Val for being indispensable. I
have learned so much from you working through this story that
I'm not sure I would have otherwise. Thank you so much for
reading through it and telling me what worked and didn't. Thank
you goes to Brianna who GEd this monstrosity with a fine-toothed
comb and found all the errors I couldn't see. And a huge thank
you to Ina for helping me see it through to the end. You must
realize I wouldn't be at this point if it weren't for your
kindness, understanding, and encouragement when things got
tough.

***

Part 1: "Oh what a tangled web we weave..." -- Marmion (Walter
Scott)

***

Chapter 1

January 20, 1996

Lois Lane walked into the center of the ballroom of the Lexor
Hotel, surrounded by charming decorations, with a raised glass in
her hand. They had recreated the night he proposed complete with
paper lantern moons and smaller stars hung below the high
ceiling, keeping it darkened like the night sky while casting a
warm glow about the room. Potted trees and small sections of
vines strung with lights were positioned liberally around the
edges of the room, and smaller plants featuring little bouquets
of twinkling lights to resemble lightning bugs were placed on
tables. The scent of laurel permeating the large room brought
every detail of that unbelievable night to life in her mind.

Family and friends who had gathered with them to celebrate began
to quiet as all eyes turned to her. She was filled with a sense
of solemn gratefulness that everyone was there to share in their
happiness. She smoothed her free hand down the side of her
immaculate dress. The burgundy evening gown she chose was simply
elegant and flowed gracefully as she walked, enhancing the
ethereal feel of the whole occasion.

"Attention!" She held her glass up high and turned slowly to
address the crowd. "Attention, everyone! I'd like to say a few
words." She looked to the man she loved and smiled. "I want all
of you to know that we are both so happy that you could join us
on this wonderful occasion." She lowered her glass and
continued, "These days, marriages come and go so quickly. People
aren't always lucky enough to find their soul mates, the person
they are meant to spend the rest of their life with, their
perfect match." She paused for dramatic effect. "I, however, am
not one of those people." Her smile widened, and a tear pooled
in the corner of her eye as she fought to keep her voice calm
despite the passion overflowing from her heart.

She thought about the ups and downs of their relationship, the
difficult fights and his romantic gestures. He knew just what to
do to keep her focused and grounded, what to say to make her feel
like she was the only one that mattered. He was always there to
rescue her from the dangerous situations she always seemed to
find herself in. He'd surprise her with extravagant gifts from
faraway places and expected nothing in return. He really was
amazing.

And here he was standing with her, celebrating this occasion in
style. He had insisted on a *grand soiree* with fancy dresses and
fantastic decorations. Lois hadn't argued. She loved him and if
this was what he wanted, then she would play along and enjoy
herself.

As she crossed the room to her perfect match, she took a deep
breath. He caught her outstretched hand and swung her around as
if to dance. An "aw" went around the room. He gathered her
close and kissed her temple. She placed a hand on his chest which
he promptly covered with his free hand, lending his strength to
her.

She collected her thoughts and continued, "Here we are at our
second anniversary! I don't know why this lunkhead feels the
need to throw such a big party for such a small milestone." The
crowd collectively laughed as she rolled her eyes and shook her
head, remembering the last month of endless planning and
preparing as if it were their 25th anniversary. He had insisted,
though, and his excitement was contagious. "While it feels like
we've been married *forever*, it also feels like it was just
yesterday."

"I am in complete agreement!" he said as he looked deeply into
her eyes. "While I knew she could never say no to me," he
paused as the crowd laughed again, "I never realized how happy
marrying Lois would make me. You all have *no idea* what we've
been through to get to this point."

She lowered her gaze to where her hand rested on his chest.
Memories of their relationship passed through her mind. How she
was surprised he wanted to date her. How difficult it was to get
to know him. How she refused his proposal. How she finally
accepted.

He gave her hand a tender squeeze. "She's right, you know. We
are very glad you all made it here to recreate a wonderful event
with us. It is because of all of you that we're even here
today!"

"A kiss! A kiss!" one of the party guests cheered. Other guests
joined in, and it was clear they would not give up until they had
what they wanted.

Lois met his gaze head on and couldn't stop the smile that
spread across her face even if she wanted to, which she
definitely didn't. Anyone could see the genuine affection there
in his eyes. As she leaned closer to him, he glanced at her lips
and filled her with warm desire before he pressed his lips gently
to hers.

"I love you, Lois," he murmured.

She kissed him again.

"I love you, too, Lex."

***

Clark Kent sat up in his bed with a jolt, the covers slipping
from his chest, and shoved his fingers through his mussed hair.
He couldn't remember the last time he had slept well. The
darkened image of a face continued to haunt his dreams. Always
the same unfamiliar face, sometimes mocking him, sometimes
angry.

Rubbing his face with his hands, he took a deep breath and tried
to distract himself from the lingering image. He needed to think
of something else. Anything that might help him get back to
sleep.

Looking to his left, he was surprised to find the other half of
his bed empty.

A quick glance at the clock told him that he had only been asleep
for about an hour. Clark threw off the covers and made his way to
the kitchen.

Lana Lang was seated at the dining table, elbows propped up on
the edge, forehead resting in her hands. Something was wrong.

She didn't acknowledge his presence, though she must have heard
him. Her shoulders drooped forward, and she rubbed her hands down
her face, leaving them on her chin. She always did that when
something was bothering her. He grabbed the buttermilk from the
fridge and a few glasses from the cabinet before taking a seat
next to her, ready to take on whatever her troubles were.

"Who's Lois?" she asked without raising her head.

"Lois?" he asked, frowning. That was definitely not what he was
expecting. Had Clark even told Lana about Lois Lane? "I worked
with a Lois back when I was in Metropolis. I don't know anyone
else by that name, so I assume that's who you are talking about.
Why do you ask?"

"When was the last time you saw her?" She still didn't look
up.

He leaned forward to see her face, but she turned her head away
from his and brought her hand up to block his view. He had no
choice but to follow along until she was ready to explain it.

"Probably two years ago. I worked with her at the Planet on a
story or two." Clark didn't see the need to expand on the guilt
that always came over him when he remembered his time in
Metropolis. He poured a bit of buttermilk into each glass.

"Clark, I..." She swallowed. When she turned her eyes to him,
they were filled with sadness and jealousy. Clark was shocked to
see those emotions on her face. "Did you know you talk in your
sleep?"

No, he definitely did *not* know that. Clark raised his eyebrows
and waited for her to elaborate as he pushed one of the glasses
to her. Taking a sip of his own, he wondered if maybe he'd been
talking about that face. But then why would she be asking about
Lois?

"It's been happening for a couple of weeks now," she began to
explain. She got up and started pacing back and forth as much as
a person could in the tiny kitchen. "You've been talking about
her in your sleep. Like you know her... very well. Like you miss
her." She stopped and turned to him as he took a sip of his
buttermilk. "Like you are in *love* with her."

The sip of buttermilk he'd been drawing into his mouth suddenly
went down the wrong direction, and Clark gasped for air as he
tried to cough it up. The stinging in his windpipe persisted in
spite of his attempts to dislodge it as his mind focused on that
one word.

*Love*? Had he heard Lana right? Love? She thought he *loved*
Lois? He was stunned by her observation. He didn't even think
about Lois when he was awake! Every time it came up that he
worked in Metropolis for a while, he felt such intense guilt that
he had to find something to take his mind off of it. He didn't
quite know how to handle that. Nothing else had ever made him
feel so guilty. Maybe Lana was misconstruing his guilt as love.

"Lana, I don't love her," he said matter-of-factly. "In fact,
whenever I think about her, or my short time in Metropolis, all I
can see is how I let her and the Planet down." He shrugged his
shoulders. "I've never felt this much guilt over anything. You
must have picked up on--"

"You said 'I love you, Lois,'" she interrupted, cutting short
his attempt to explain with a wave of her arms. With an
exasperated sigh, she went back to pacing the tiny kitchen.

Clark's eyebrows shot up. She couldn't be serious.

"Clark," she continued, her arms becoming involved in her
bitter reproof of him, "I have known you my whole life. I
thought you'd never lie to me--"

"And I *haven't*," he defended as he stood up from his seat.

"--but you haven't even told *me* you love me as much as
you've said it to her *in your sleep*." Her voice cracked, and
he could see the path a tear had taken down her cheek even as she
continued to pace, her voice gradually rising higher and the
frown on her face deepening as she rambled on. "You have to be
lying! Night after night, you've talked to her like she's
there. Sometimes I worry you see her when you're looking at me
when you *are* awake."

Clark was speechless. How could this be? Guilt. That was it. He
felt nothing but guilt when he thought about Lois. And that was
*not* very often. They weren't even partners for very long --
three, four days at most. She had told him what she thought about
his mistake. He left knowing he'd never make it there. How could
he be talking about her, to her, in his sleep?

"Don't act surprised," she spat, her words stinging. "Though
as much as you seem to be in love with Lois, I can see why you
wouldn't have noticed how upset it's making me..." she trailed
off, bringing her hands up to wipe the tears from her face.

He grabbed her shoulders and turned her to face him. "Lana," he
said with determination, "I have no explanation for what you're
saying. And I *have* noticed you haven't quite been yourself for
a while. In fact, I'm glad you've finally told me. But know
this -- I have never lied in my whole life. I don't love Lois. I
love *you*."

She hung her head, clearly unconvinced. "I can't do this
anymore. I can't listen to you talk about her, to her every
night." She shrugged from his grasp and stepped back from him.
"I'm going to stay at my place. When you are ready to be honest
with me, let me know." With this, she turned and walked to pick
up the duffle bag by the back door.

When had she packed a bag?

"Lana, wait!" he called after her, reaching his hand toward
her. She paused in the doorway without turning around, and he
begged, "Please, can we talk about this? I don't even remember
saying anything. What else did I say?"

She looked over her shoulder with sadness in her eyes. "I'm
sure it'll come to you." And with that, she left.

***

Perry White, Editor in Chief of the Daily Planet, sat at his
large mahogany desk reviewing storyboards for the next edition.
With a pen in hand, he took a slow deep breath, pausing in his
work to rub his tired eyes. He'd been doing this job for more
years than he was willing to admit and though it was occasionally
the hardest job in the world, he wouldn't trade a minute of it
for some easy button-pusher job.

There was one thing he would change, but he didn't often think
about it. It was floating around in his mind tonight, however,
after he was reminded of it. He'd received an invitation to
Lois's anniversary celebration, but he couldn't bring himself
to show up. He was glad she was happy with Lex Luthor, but
something about it just didn't sit right with him.

She must have held him at least partially responsible for the
fiasco that had ended her career at the Planet. It had been his
fault on many counts, the least of which was his faulty character
assessment abilities. He shouldn't have been fooled by that
Midwest sincerity. He should have known he couldn't trust a hack
from Nowheresville. But his heart had made him believe in the kid
and give him a chance. And it hadn't taken long for him to
realize his mistake and to lose his prized reporter.

She had left the Daily Planet to work as a reporter for LNN
immediately following the whole debacle, and he had gradually
lost touch with her. His shock at receiving an invitation to her
wedding had fizzled slowly over time as happenings in the town
took precedence over his personal life. Even now, he couldn't
recall the reason he hadn't been able to make it.

Surprised that she sent him an invitation to her anniversary
party, he considered going before guilt made him feel like he
just wouldn't really be welcome there. The last time he'd seen
Lois in person had been several months ago and purely
coincidental.

The door opened, and Jimmy Olsen walked in, shaking his head
while looking at the pad of paper he was carrying and tapping a
pencil in the middle of his writing.

"Chief," he began, "I think there's more to this medical
malpractice case... But you won't believe what I think is going
on."

*Jimmy's a good kid*, Perry thought, in contrast to Clark Kent.
Jimmy had been in the right place when Clark had left the Planet.
It all had happened so fast. The story wasn't written yet, and
Jimmy had stepped up and proven his worth by filling in and doing
an excellent job of it too. *Much better than Clark was even
capable of*. Since then, Jimmy had only been improving,
demonstrating he was the right man for the job.

This fraud case was a weird one, though, and Perry wasn't sure
it was worth the time. A couple of months ago, a small set of
patients filed medical malpractice lawsuits against one health
care facility. Their complaints centered around one issue:
healthcare fraud. Seven claims came in over a couple of days
indicating that a doctor there, whom they weren't at liberty to
identify, performed unnecessary procedures on the patients.

All the claims were roughly the same. They were filed by a family
member, not the patient. Each patient had denied having been to
the doctor* *for *any* kind of treatment. No records were found
that the patients in question had even been admitted to the
treatment facility. Furthermore, no physical evidence existed on
the patient to suggest any kind of procedure had been done, and
none of the hospital staff even remembered the patients in
question being in the hospital.

The only evidence was anecdotal from family members, with
corroborating testimonies from employers about reasons for taking
the day off and from colleagues that the family members had
spoken to about the patient going to the doctor's treatment
facility. The cases never even made it to trial due to the fact
that the only evidence could have been easily fabricated.

Jimmy had spoken with the family members, and they all had
similar stories to tell, though, none of the patients had gone to
the facility for the same ailment. The procedures the patients
were calling into question were supposed to fix the ailments the
patients claimed never to have had in the first place. Because
the patient was reported to not have the ailment, the facility's
defense was that the procedure had apparently happened since the
patient no longer suffered from it. The only thing they had in
common was that all of the patients in question reported having
memory problems after visiting the facility. It was a continuous
cycle of shifting the blame from one party to another as each new
piece of evidence told another side of the story.

Perry thought the most intriguing thing about it was the fact
that since the first seven cases came up, and were subsequently
shot down, eleven more claims had been filed over the past month,
fitting the same story as the previous ones. The sheer number of
claims at this point was beginning to raise suspicion. But still
there remained a lack of evidence.

"What won't I believe?" Perry didn't look up. He was a master
at multitasking, and it was easier to set reporters straight when
they had bad ideas if he wasn't looking into their faces. He
always kept his head down just in case.

"The guys at the lab were able to clear up that image of our
informant and the unknown person of interest..." Jimmy's
friend, Jack, had been following one of the doctors from the
facility in question on occasion, doing some light surveillance,
and snapped a picture of what appeared to be a suspicious
exchange of *something*.

Perry realized that Jimmy had stopped and was waiting for Perry
to look up at him.

"Lex Luthor," Jimmy said, his voice filled with intrigue.

Surprise pulled Perry's eyebrows up. Lex Luthor was a kind,
caring, generous humanitarian that worked tirelessly to make
Metropolis a better place. Knowing that Lois was married to the
guy gave Perry some peace of mind. He trusted Luthor to protect
her and provide for her. But he'd thought Kent would be good for
her, and he'd been wrong about that.

He shook his head, dismissing his concern. There was no way that
Lois would put up with this if she knew about it. And there was
no way that Lois, the best damn investigative reporter the Daily
Planet had ever seen, would be married to a man involved in
criminal activity and remain unaware of it.

"You're right, I don't believe it," he said as he shifted his
attention back to the story boards.

***

Chapter 2

Lois's breath caught, surprised when Lex suddenly began spinning
her away from him. She recognized the strains of a familiar waltz
encompassing them as he spun her back into his arms. Unchained
Melody. It was the same song they had first danced to at their
wedding. The small orchestra had begun playing during their short
speech, but she was so caught up in her emotions that she didn't
register it until now. She smiled as she came back to him.

"Dance with me," he pleaded.

Lois merely widened her smile at him in answer. A nearby waiter
took her glass, and away they went to begin with ease the
beautiful steps they'd been practicing. She never expected Lex
to suggest professional dancing lessons. She had known some
sophisticated dances before marrying him and considered herself
competent despite her lack of outlets to use her skills but
blissfully conceded when he explained that it was merely an
opportunity to spend more time with her. Romantic gestures and
excuses to spend time with one another were his style and she
loved that about him.

The passionate dances they practiced did indeed bring them
closer. They swayed and turned to the music as the crowd watched,
Lois's dress flaring out gorgeously as they spun. Lex briefly
glanced about the room before his attention landed back on her.

"Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?" Lex asked.
She could feel the warmth from his hand on her back as he pressed
her closer to himself.

"Yes," she responded with a coy smile, "but you can say it
again."

He tightened his hold on her, put his mouth inches from here ear,
and said in a low husky voice meant only for her to hear, "You
look beautiful tonight." He then spun her way from him.

She let out a quick breath followed by a short laugh. She smiled
back at him as she thought of something different to say in
return before she got back to him. Handsome just wasn't the word
she wanted. "You look ... quite dashing yourself," she said as
she came back to him.

"Dashing?" He chuckled and tossed his head back. "That sounds
so... old fashioned, but I love it." He gave her hand a squeezed
and spun her slowly around in front of him, trailing his hand
around her middle.

"But," he started as he brought them to a halt and pulled her
even closer, his hand splayed across her back. His eyes took in
her face before settling on her eyes. "Not as much as I love
you."

She stared at his face with a small smile on her lips, feeling
his eyes bore into her.

"I will *never* stop loving you," he said with quiet intensity
that filled her with tenderness.

"I know." She smiled at him. "I love you, too."

He kissed her there in the middle of the dance floor. A gentle,
lingering kiss. His kisses were often so passionate, as if he
needed to prove something with them. She knew even without them
that he loved her more than life itself.

A cheer from the crowd reminded her they were on display. He
pulled back and looked deeply into her eyes, and she thought
about how lucky she was to have someone who cherished her as he
did. Lois viewed herself as an independent, proficient, and
assertive person, but she surprisingly liked being cherished this
way.

They began to sway with the music once more, swirling about the
room as other couples finally joined in. As they clung to each
other amidst the dancing crowd, she thought back to the day of
his proposal, how strange the circumstances were and how romantic
it had been.

###

*November 11, 1994*

*She'd been investigating a jewelry store theft the day before.
It was an anomaly as there was absolutely no evidence at the
scene other than the missing diamonds. The only possible clue was
a picture caught by an ATM machine across the street of a person
who showed a remarkable resemblance to Superman. Lois's
interactions with Superman were generally brief, and his behavior
was always detached and a bit aloof, but she just couldn't
imagine him misusing his powers in such a brazen way.*

*That morning, Superman had met with her in a strange apartment
that must have belonged to one of his accomplices, which she
assumed he must have had. She was there because he had invited
her, and, when she spoke with him over the phone, she'd heard
something along the lines of desperation in his voice.*

*He had insisted that she arrive alone, but Lois notified Lex of
her plans. They agreed that she would go to see what he wanted
but that Lex would wait outside just in case. And she was
thankful she had brought Lex with her. As soon as she arrived,
she had this chilly feeling that something was not as it seemed.
Superman was seated on the couch in the living room of this
unfamiliar place.*

"*Lois, please have a seat," Superman said without looking at
her, gesturing to the spot next to him on the couch. "I need
your help." He kept his eyes on something behind her. He seemed
conflicted, like he didn't really appreciate needing anyone's
help. How could she blame him for that? He had superpowers. He
probably didn't have a frame of understanding what it was like
to not be able to do something on his own.*

"*What exactly do you need from me?" Lois asked hesitantly.*

"*I was the one who robbed the jewelry store," he said
unceremoniously. "But I didn't want to. I was tricked into it.
Someone is blackmailing me." He finally looked at her then, and
she could tell there was more. She felt cold in his icy stare.*

"*What do you need from me?" she asked again. She couldn't
explain why she was filled with these chilling impressions of
this celebrated superhero, but she found that she was afraid of
the answer that was coming.*

"*They want you dead," he said quickly. "I have to kill Lois
Lane." The unemotional way he said this left her feeling like he
couldn't possibly be the same superhero who regularly saved the
lives of anyone in dire circumstances.*

*Lois opened her mouth to say something, though what she would
say she didn't know. What do you say to Superman when he says he
needs to kill you? She was saved from having to answer when the
door of the apartment flew open, and Lex stormed in.*

*Lex looked enraged. "How dare you!" he spat at Superman. "You
are supposed to stand for truth and justice. That you would even
consider this is despicable."*

*Superman dropped his head into his hands. "I know! I know! I
just couldn't see another way," he sobbed.*

*Lex seemed to feel some sense of relief at Superman's remorse.
His look softened and he shook his head.*

"*Please, Luthor. Help me! I don't know what to do," Superman
begged as he reached toward Lex with his right hand. "Surely you
can help me."*

*Lex looked at Superman as a person would look upon excrement on
their shoe. Lois knew Superman was invincible, the only way for
this to work out was for Lex to help Superman figure out a way to
thwart the blackmailers.*

"*I'll help," he conceded, "on the condition that you
acknowledge the fact that you needed help. We can't have your
head getting any bigger than it already is."*

"*Anything," Superman spewed desperately. He was practically
groveling, and Lois couldn't help but feel sorry for him.*

"*Your super breath is cold, yes? Cold enough to cryogenically
freeze a person?" Lois choked out a cough when he said this,
drawing Lex's attention away from Superman momentarily. The look
he gave her indicated that he understood the risk, and even so,
thought this was a viable solution. She shook her head in both
confusion and refusal. Lex proceeded with his terrible idea,
"And your heat vision, it can be dispersed or is it always a
beam?"*

"*I can spread it over a small area," Superman said, not
seeming to follow what Lex was getting at.*

*But Lois understood. It made sense now -- Superman could freeze
her and then thaw her later. When Lex looked to her to gauge her
response, she gave the slightest of nods. He turned back to
Superman.*

"*You will freeze Lois. You will take me with you to meet up
with your adversary and hide me until the time is right. I will
help you bring him to justice, and then you will revive Lois."
He spoke confidently as though he was sure this plan would be
successful. His willingness to stand up to this unmatched
superhero was impressive.*

*Lex came to her and looked into her eyes. "I have no doubt
I'll see you soon," he said, a mixture of emotions coloring his
tone.*

"*I know," she breathed out slowly.*

"*Close your eyes," Lex softly instructed.*

*When she did, he put his hand to her cheek, and she turned to
press her cheek more firmly against it, her eyes coming open as
realization sank in. She knew he would do anything for her.*

"*Close your eyes," he repeated.*

*She did as he said even though she was nervous, but as the cold
swept over her, she felt like she was simply falling asleep.*

*She heard someone calling.*

"*Don't you die on me," she heard Lex say. "Lois, now come
on, don't give up."*

*She tried to respond, but her entire body felt as though
something dense was laid upon her.*

"*Come on. Breathe, Lois, breathe," Lex begged. She felt
something resting on her chest and finally managed to draw a
breath. She began coughing as he cradled her in his arms and
whispered soothing words in here ear.*

"*I heard you calling," she struggled to say. "I heard you
calling."*

*They could have been there forever in that embrace for she had
no idea how long it lasted.*

###

*Later that evening, they had a simple yet romantic dinner that
evening and went for a walk in the part afterward. Lois was still
feeling a little rattled from her brush with death at the hands
of Superman. She couldn't imagine what would have happened if
Lex hadn't shown up when he did.*

*As they walked down the pea-gravel path, Lois shivered.*

"*You chilly?" Lex asked as he put his arm around her
shoulder.*

"*No," Lois replied. That shiver was related more to her
harrowing experiences earlier that day than the cooling
temperatures of the evening air as a storm approached. She
reached up to lace her fingers with his.*

"*Lois, I've been thinking," Lex began tentatively.*

"*Me too," Lois put in. She had been doing a lot of thinking
since her clinical death a few hours beforehand.*

"*What about?" he asked with sincere curiosity.*

"*You first," she insisted. Whatever she'd been thinking about
could wait.*

"*Okay," he said with a smile as he lowered his head. He paused
for a moment, composing himself before speaking. "Sometimes...
you think you're immortal." He watched his feet as they walked.
"You start to think that the people around you are, too. And it
just takes a second to realize how... wrong you are... about
everything."*

*They stopped there in the middle of the walkway, and Lex turned
Lois to face him.*

"*Listen," Lex began, looking Lois straight in the eye. "What
I'm trying to say, Lois, is I almost lost you and I... feel...
ashamed." He looked to his left and sighed.*

*Lois leaned to her right to be able to look into his face,
trying to bring his attention back to her. What was bothering him
so? "Ashamed? Why?" she asked as she searched his eyes.*

"*I kept pushing you away even when I promised I'd stop." He
looked directly into her eyes. "If you died without ever knowing
why, I'd never be able to forgive myself. Because I love
you."*

*Lois smiled at this profession and reached to run her fingers
through his hair and caress his face. She could tell he had more
to say and held in her response until he was finished. He took
her hand and led her to the fountain they had neared while
walking and asked her to sit.*

*A flash of lightning brightened their surroundings, and a crack
of thunder rent through the air. She looked up as the impending
storm broke free.*

*Lex lifted his face to the falling rain and with exasperation in
his voice declared, "Come on! Give me a break!"*

"*You want to go back?" Lois asked while ducking her head to
avoid getting rain in her eyes.*

*Lex looked back at her with fierce determination. "If the earth
opened up at my feet, I wouldn't move until I'd said this."
Without averting his eyes, Lex knelt in front of Lois and took
her hand in his.*

*Lois saw what was coming, and her heart beat rapidly in her
chest. Was she ready to hear these words again? She hadn't been
ready the first time. Was she ready to answer them now?*

"*Lois," Lex began, rain dripping from his hair into his face,
"will you marry me?"*

*Lois sucked in a breath as Lex brought out an intricate,
beautifully designed diamond engagement ring.*

"*Yes," she heard herself say.*

###

Lex had initially seemed like a cold, untouchable bigwig who only
surrounded himself with people he could use as stepping stones in
his pursuit of greatness. Everything she knew told her he was a
power hungry, devil-may-care business man. And as a reporter she
wanted to know the man behind the exterior. Was there someone
else in there waiting to be discovered? Was it just an act?

She'd met him and then dated him, and he was romantic and caring
and... surprisingly thoughtful. Now, she was *married* to him.
And he was *very* different than the facade he presented to the
world. He was sincere and caring and had a knack for being in the
right place at the right time to rescue her, just like that day.

Applause picked up around the room as the dance ended, and they
left the floor, making their way to a group of Lex's friends.
Scott Ferguson, a good friend of Lex's who also happened to be
her camera man at LNN on his recommendation, came up to them with
a mischievous smile on his face. She was glad to see him this
way. His sister had passed away just the week before, and he had
been distraught.

"Lex, would you mind terribly if I danced with your beautiful
wife?" Scott asked, his expression looking worried for just a
moment. "That is, if it's okay with you, Lois."

She gave a nod and considered that worried look. Lex acted the
possessive husband, and Lois enjoyed feeling protected and
wanted, but he couldn't be offended by her dancing with Scott.
Lex and Scott had a history together. He was certainly not a
stranger. Why then did Scott have that questioning look on his
face?

"Only if you promise to bring her right back to me," Lex
allowed with a smile. He gave Lois a quick kiss on the cheek and
released her hand.

***

Chapter 3

Clark walked out onto the back patio of the small house he had
rented. It was unusually pleasant tonight after a warm front
pushed northward yesterday. Everyone from Columbia claimed that
the weather in Missouri was like this -- snowing one day, sunny
and warm the next, but Clark had traveled to too many places to
have never heard that one before.

He sank down into the hammock strung between the posts of the
pergola. As he threaded his fingers behind his head and reclined,
he stared into the black night sky. Only a few stars were visible
from where they lived inside the small city.

Metropolis had even fewer stars in the sky.

After working at the Daily Planet for a while, Clark had decided
he couldn't take the pressure the big city newsroom put on a
person. He longed to return to his relaxed lifestyle in the
country in Kansas. So he did. Only it wasn't that simple...

When he came back to Smallville, his hometown, his parents had
encouraged him to settle for something in between, pushing him to
get a new job. If Clark didn't know they wanted him to be
successful, he would have assumed they were just trying to get
rid of him.

He traveled around for a while, working at small town papers in a
few places, writing a story here or there. None were very good,
and he moved on when the paper he worked for found out just how
big of a blunder he was responsible for at the Planet.

When he finally made it home a few months ago, his parents even
went so far as to help him find a job this time. Jonathan Kent
knew some guys from his high school days who had moved to
Columbia and, like Clark, were interested in journalism. They had
made it and were working with the local paper there, the News
Tribune. Jonathan put the word out that Clark was looking, and
the position was brought to his attention.

"You'll never be able to cut it in the big city if you don't
work your way up," his dad advised. "Start with something
easier. Columbia is a nice town that's not too big but growing
fast. Give it a try for a while and when that gets to be too
easy, try Metropolis again."

Clark had never felt so worthless and lost but agreed to try it.
Before leaving, he spent a few days in Smallville, trying to
refocus and let go, but he just couldn't. No matter what he did,
the guilt that had plagued him since leaving Metropolis wouldn't
loosen its hold on him. That's when he ran into Lana.

###

*November 21, 1995*

"*Clark?" an unsure voice shouted from across the street as he
was walking to ease his mind one afternoon. When he turned, he
saw Lana standing on the other side of the street, waving
furiously in his direction. He smiled, and she exclaimed,
"Clark! It is you!" She ran to him and swung her arms around
his neck.*

*Lana had been Clark's friend since high school. She knew him
better than anyone else. They had even dated. He was always
careful to keep people at a distance, but he'd let Lana get
closer than anyone other than his parents. He was shy and not
very sure of himself. But Lana made him feel like he mattered.*

*He reveled in knowing that someone still cared enough about him
to make an effort to speak to him but was reluctant to believe
that it would last.*

"*Lana," he said, pushing her away gently. "How are you?"*

"*Great! You?" she asked with a huge smile on her face.*

"*I'm okay," he said half-heartedly, watching her smile
falter. "I heard you're going off to grad school." A dinner
time chat with his mother always revealed all the local gossip.
Including that Lana wasn't dating anyone and was about to leave
town to continue her education.*

"*I am." She smiled a big, genuine smile directed right at
Clark. It thawed him the tiniest bit. "Can I walk with you?"*

"*Sure, but I'm not headed anywhere in particular." He held
out his elbow for her to take and when she did, her fingers
clutched his arm tenderly.*

"*That's okay," she said with a twinkle in her eye. "I'm
just glad to see you. We can go anywhere you want." She waved
her hand as if she really would follow him anywhere.*

*They began walking down the street, and Clark felt nervous,
though he didn't understand why. He hadn't dated anyone else
for that length of time back in high school, but he never viewed
her as his girlfriend. He was sure, however, that Lana had
thought of him as her boyfriend. When they went their separate
ways after graduating, he lost touch with her... except for what
his mother told him. Lana seemed content to just walk with him,
but the silence between them felt awkward. Like it meant more
than it did. He quickly searched for something to say. "So, what
are you up to these days?" he asked with as much interest as he
could manage.*

"*Not too much," she began, "just visiting family while I'm
here." She paused but seemed to have more to say. Clark waited
as she used her fingers to brush back the hair that the wind had
gotten caught under her chin. "Actually, I'm leaving in just a
few days. I've been accepted to a grad program in a journalism
school." Her subdued tone gave him the impression that she
wasn't quite as excited about that as she was to see Clark.*

"*That's great. Where at?" he asked as they turned the corner
and made their way from the main street onto a less busy road
that would eventually lead them to a small park near the center
of town.*

"*Columbia, Missouri," she replied. "So not too far off."*

"*Columbia? Really?" he questioned. His mother usually kept him
fully abreast of Lana's every movement. She would have known.
But she never said anything about Columbia. Was this merely a
slip of memory, or was there something more to it?*

"*Yeah," she confirmed. She looked up at him with a frown on
her face. "Why? You don't think it's a good idea?"*

"*No," Clark quickly reassured her. "It's just that I'm
going there, too." It was completely possible that his mother
had everything to do with this particular 'friend' of his
dad's that just 'happened' to have a job for Clark...*

*Hearing this news, Lana's face lit up, quickly transforming her
frown into a smile. "You're kidding! Are you in the journalism
school too?"*

"*No," Clark immediately refuted. "No advanced degrees for me.
I'm ready to get in the thick of things... I think." Lana
didn't seem to notice the hesitancy in Clark's voice. As much
as he was trying to hide it, his low confidence was so
all-encompassing that small, self-deprecating statements would
slip out occasionally.*

"*That's cool. Maybe we can get together once we are both
there." No, she hadn't noticed. Her attention was focused on a
very artful display of flowers in front of the house they passed.
She reached for a petal on a flower as they continued walking.
"So, you will be working at the paper there?"*

"*Yeah," he admitted. "My dad hooked me up with some friend of
his there." He didn't like admitting that he hadn't found the
job himself, but he felt like he could tell her anything. And if
something was going to push her away, he'd rather it happen now
and not later.*

"*That's great," she replied, looking at him now. "What will
you be doing?"*

"*Reporter, city government. Dad thinks it's a good place for
me," he added.*

"*You don't sound so convinced." Her eyes seemed to see right
through him. Maybe he'd said too much. He wasn't ready to let
her go just yet.*

"*Well--" he started. She pulled him to a stop and stepped in
front of him. They were nearly to the park, which would grant
them more privacy than the sidewalk in front of someone's
house.*

"*In fact," Lana continued, "you don't really seem like
yourself." She crossed her arms in front of her and gave him one
of those 'tell me the truth' looks.*

"*Is that so?" He wanted to avoid this topic of conversation.*

"*Yes!" she insisted. "The Clark I know is confident and happy
and outgoing. You--" She gestured to him with her right arm--
"seem down and... not confident at all." The way she emphasized
the last word gave the impression she was getting a little fed up
with it.*

"*Well..." Clark started again but couldn't quite think of
what to say or how to explain what made him feel this way.*

"*What happened Clark?" Lana asked quietly. Maybe she finally
realized he didn't want to talk in that spot because she grabbed
his elbow again and pulled him toward the park. "The last I
knew, you went to Metropolis to be a reporter there."*

"*That was a long time ago," he commented. Two years really,
but it hadn't lasted that long.*

"*Maybe." As they reached the entrance to the park, she slowed
their pace and laced her fingers together around the arm she
held. Clark was surprised by how awkward it felt when they had
walked like this dozens of times in high school. "When did you
leave Metropolis?" she interrupted his woolgathering.*

"*Shortly after I got there." She was getting closer to the
truth, and he knew it. It was only a matter of time.*

"*Why?" Such a simple question. Her tone lacked disappointment
now, but that would soon change.*

"*I screwed up," he admitted. The end of his friendship with
Lana loomed even closer.*

"*How?" Her tone didn't change with this question. But she did
stop him again, this time in a small alcove in the trees of the
park. She turned Clark to face her again and waited with such a
patient look on her face that he knew she'd be hurt by what he
was about to admit.*

"*I made some bad choices and was swayed by someone involved in
a story I was working on," Clark blurted out quickly. It would
be better to rip the band-aid off in one go.*

"*Surely it wasn't all that bad," Lana softly reassured him,
brushing off his bad choices. She must not have understood what
he was saying.*

"*It was," he argued, his anger at himself furrowing his brow.
"People died... because of me." He hung his head.*

*She didn't say anything. He didn't need to look up to see the
disappointment on her face. He knew exactly what it would look
like.*

"*Look," he said as he started to turn away, "I have to go,
I'll see you around."*

"*Clark," she said gently as she grabbed his arm again. "Wait.
Tell me more about it."*

"*I-- I don't think so." This was too much. Why didn't she
just let him go?*

"*Later?" she asked. "You really seem like you need a friend.
Have dinner with me. My house? I'll cook." Her request sounded
so sweet, and he could tell from her expression she genuinely
cared.*

"*I don't know..." he said, evading her question as well as
the look on her face.*

"*Come on," she encouraged. "It will do you some good to talk
about it." She squeezed his arm, moved into his line of sight,
and tilted her head so that he saw her eyebrows lift and her eyes
soften, silently pleading with him to comply. He could feel his
resolve melting.*

"*I don't know..." he repeated. Clark was beginning to think
that if she had stayed after his admission, maybe she wouldn't
run from him.*

"*Well, come for dinner then," she instructed. "And don't
tell me about it."*

*He hesitated a moment and watched disappointment flicker across
her face. He couldn't say no to her and be the cause of that
disappointment. "Okay," he relented. Surely, he could have
dinner with her. Maybe she wouldn't ask more questions about
what had happened.*

###

*After worrying the entire afternoon, Clark arrived at Lana's
house. He knocked on the door despite his misgivings and waited
for a response.*

*A very cheery-eyed Lana answered the door. "Hey Clark!" She
took his outstretched hand and, instead of shaking it, used it to
steady herself as she stood up on her toes and kissed his cheek.
"I made your favorite: bourbon beef tenderloin with a potato
galette and shaved asparagus."*

"*Thanks, Lana," he said as sincerely as possible, following
her into her apartment. "You didn't have to do that." And he
wished he hadn't made her think he liked it. But he couldn't
confess to lying to her the first time she had made dinner for
him. He would just have to endure it.*

*She shrugged as he followed her into the dining room of her
modest apartment. "I wanted to. You seem so... dejected, I had
to do something."*

*It was how he felt. "Thanks, I think."*

"*You're welcome," she said matter-of-factly. She motioned to
the seat at the head of the table. "Here, have a seat," she
suggested and then sat in the seat to his right.*

*Once seated, Clark looked over the beautifully laid table. He
complimented the food, they said grace, and then they began
eating over small talk. It was only a little awkward to Clark,
but from the way Lana carried on, he didn't think she felt
awkward at all. A lull in the conversation and a significant look
from Lana warned him that something was coming.*

"*So, I'm hoping--" she started. He didn't know what she was
hoping, but he needed to set some boundaries to protect her.*

"*Lana," he interrupted, "I don't think we should meet up in
Columbia." He found himself unable to look at her again, not
wanting to see the disappointment. Disappointment was all he ever
brought anyone. Didn't she see that?*

"*What? Why not?" He could hear the frown in her voice.
Confusion was probably written all over her face, but he didn't
look at her to see it.*

"*I'm..." Clark wasn't sure how to explain this. He tried
again, "They'll turn you away because you're hanging out with
me."*

"*They will not," she immediately argued.*

"*Yes, they will," he countered as he finally looked up. The
single raised eyebrow and doubt in her eyes explained why she
hadn't sounded angry yet. She didn't believe what he was
saying.*

"*Then you have to tell me what happened," she shot back with
determination. "Because I just can't imagine it being your
fault." She set her fork down, leaned back in her chair, and
crossed her arms over her chest.*

*He knew that look.*

"*Fine," he once again relented.*

*As he disclosed what had happened, explaining as briefly as
possible what had gone so wrong in Metropolis, Lana sat
patiently, nodding and frowning at appropriate times. When he
finished, Clark remained seated, fidgeting, while Lana seemed to
be taking it in.*

*Finally, she leaned forward with her elbows on the table and
nonchalantly said, "Well, I think you are making more out of
this than is really there."*

*Would she ever respond to any of this in a way he expected?
"But I kept getting booted from my job after they found out
about it."*

"*Then stop hiding it," she said simply and leaned back in her
chair, her arms relaxed on the table now.*

"*What?" he asked, returning her challenging expression with
one of disbelief.*

"*Be up front," she explained. "Let them know your side of the
story. Explain it so they understand what happened. You know deep
down that he didn't die because of you. Yet you've done a
fantastic job of convincing yourself he did, and I don't have a
clue why."*

*He leaned back in the chair and looked at her for a moment. He
took a deep breath and let it out slowly as he thought about her
point.*

*As if she could read his mind, she suddenly smirked. "You know
I'm right."*

*Clark couldn't stop the small amount of relief he was feeling
from showing on his face in the form of a smile taking over the
corners of his mouth.*

"*And I'd appreciate it if you would let me decide for myself
whether you are worth spending time with," she added. She sat
forward, reached for his hand, and gave it a squeeze.*

*Her response was so inconsistent with what he had been expecting
that he found himself nearly overcome with gratitude. "Okay."
He squeezed her hand in return and looked to her. "Thank you,"
he said.*

*Lana quickly leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "You are
welcome."*

"*I love you," Clark blurted, surprising even himself. At
Lana's small gasp he tried to cover up, "You know... like
a..."*

"*Like...?" she prompted. Her eyes were wide and expectant. He
wished he could take it back but realized it wasn't entirely
false and maybe he could admit that.*

"*I don't know..." he said, frustrated at his own ineptness at
expressing his feelings. "You just... matter... a lot. I... I
need you."*

*While it clearly wasn't what she hoped to hear, she smiled
sincerely and squeezed his hand again. "It's nice to be
needed."*

"*Is it?" he said as he looked down at their hands, unable to
imagine the feeling.*

"*I need you, too," Lana admitted with a smile. "I didn't
like the idea of being all alone in Columbia, but I'm glad I'll
have someone there now."*

*And Clark wouldn't be completely alone in this new city either.
Maybe that had been why things didn't go so well in Metropolis.
Maybe this would be different.*

###

And it had been. He followed Lana's advice and was honest with
his new editor about what had happened in Metropolis. And she was
right -- the editor in chief didn't see it in the same way Clark
had been convincing himself that he would. He finally felt a bit
of reprieve from the state of depression he seemed to be stuck
in.

Once they moved to Columbia, things progressed quickly with Lana.
She came over a few nights after they arrived, complained that
she couldn't sleep because her roommates were playing loud
music, and asked to spend the night. She slept on the couch with
her blankets and pillows that she brought with her. A few nights
later she came back and after watching a movie together, they
fell asleep in Clark's bed. And then she began to stay every
night.

Clark had stopped them every time anything intimate started to
happen. He found himself very nervous about being too close to
Lana in that way, not quite like when he was in high school.
There was something he couldn't explain stopping him. It just
didn't feel right. Still, they would snuggle up while sleeping,
and Lana seemed to be okay with it. He did tell Lana he loved her
but just wasn't ready for more until he'd worked through all
this guilt he couldn't let go of.

He didn't feel like he could live without her right now... or
ever. Maybe being alone had caused things to not work out in
Metropolis.

But now things weren't going well again.

Lana had left.

How could Lana think he was in love with a woman he hadn't seen
in two years? It just didn't make any sense. Sure, she popped
into his mind occasionally, but it was *not* welcome or pleasant.
In order to fix his relationship with Lana though, he was going
to have to think about Lois. He needed to figure out why he was
talking about her in his sleep. But all he could recall during
his sleep was an ominous face he couldn't identify.

For the first time in a long time, Clark allowed himself to
remember those awful days...

###

*September 13, 1993*

*Clark stepped off the bus and set his things down. He took a
deep breath and surveyed the city he intended to make his new
home. He had a plan and the courage to see where it led him.*

*Clark's next stop was the Daily Planet, the newspaper he'd
dreamed of working at ever since he first started helping at the
Smallville Gazette as a runner in the small newsroom. He worked
hard to learn the ways of a reporter, and now here he was. He
hoped his letter of recommendation and a few sample stories would
be enough to get him a job as a reporter at the Daily Planet.*

*He was led into the office of Perry White, Editor in Chief. A
more intimidating man Clark had never met. Despite the brief
glance in his direction, Clark saw the years of hard work written
on his face and felt his stern eyes drill into him with practiced
discernment.*

*Mr. White shuffled through some papers, not completely focusing
on Clark yet. "So, you are Mr.... uh--" he started.*

"*Kent. Clark Kent," Clark supplied.*

"*Ah yes, Kent." Mr. White thought for a moment before the
recognition dawned on him. "Oh, Professor Carlton called me
about you. Boy, I haven't seen him in I don't know..." he
trailed off before he reached down to pick Clark's resume up off
his desk. "Let's see here. Editor, Smallville Press. Where is
that? That's...?" he asked.*

"*Kansas," Clark again supplied the answer.*

*Just then the phone rang. As Mr. White reached for it, he said
with a brisk tone, "Oh, just a minute." He then spoke to the
person on the other end. "Yes? ... Aw, tell him to keep his
pants on. ... If Carlini's can't deliver on time, just find a
place who can!" He slammed the phone down and took a deep
breath. Focusing back on Clark he asked, "Can you believe I had
to buy a blood pressure monitor last week.?"*

"*Paava leaves," Clark suggested.*

"*I beg your pardon?" Mr. White asked, not understanding what
that had to do with anything.*

"*The Ulongu tribe in New Guinea eat paava leaves to reduce
stress," Clark explained. He spent a bit of time traveling,
preparing for what he wanted to do with his life. He continued
the explanation, "It puts them in a meditative state. Maybe you
should try it."*

"*Ah, well, I see you've done some traveling," Mr. White
commented. His raised eyebrows and half smile communicated his
skepticism.*

"*Well, this is my first trip to Metropolis," Clark said with a
sheepish grin. He didn't like tooting his own horn and quickly
changed the subject. "I have some samples of my work." Clark
pulled out his portfolio and handed it to the waiting editor.*

"*Ah, good, good. Let's take a look." Mr. White perused the
papers as Clark sat back. "The... Borneo Gazette." Clark could
hear the doubt in the editor's voice as he read the headline
aloud. "Mating Rituals of the Knob-Tailed Gecko?"*

*Mr. White did not sound impressed.*

*Clark felt his hopes and dreams slipping away. Maybe his dad was
right. He should have made a back-up plan.*

"*Kent, I'm sure that these are fascinating stories. But you
see, son, this is the Daily Planet. We're the greatest newspaper
in the whole world. Now, our people are dedicated servants of the
fourth estate, who routinely handle matters of international
significance--" Mr. White's monologue was interrupted by
someone opening the door without knocking.*

"*Alright, Chief, I fixed the horn on your golf cart," the
young man said, wiping his hands on a rag after setting some
object down on the desk.*

"*Not now, Jimmy," Mr. White cut in.*

"*The tone's still off..." Jimmy continued, oblivious to the
disruption he was causing.*

"*Jimmy!" Mr. White said more sternly. "Not now." Jimmy
realized his mistake and left as Mr. White continued. "Now as...
uh... as I was saying. You just can't walk in here with this
kind of--" Again he was interrupted by someone opening the door
without knocking.*

*This time a woman came in clearly determined to be heard. Her
words came quickly while she paid little attention to anything
other than what she said and the man she addressed. Clark
immediately felt embarrassed that she was walking in on what was
obviously a rejection by the direction Mr. White's talk was
going.*

"*Chief, I think there's a story here, and we should have this
guy checked out. You know the crazy one from this morning? He was
an engineer at EPRAD and--" She spoke a mile-a-minute. She would
have kept going if Mr. White hadn't cut in, raising his hand.*

"*Now Lois, can't you see I'm in the middle of something
here?" He brought her attention to the other person in the room
as Clark's heart stopped, and the blood drained from his face.*

"*Oh," she acknowledged, her nose wrinkled into a sneer. Clark
couldn't knock the feeling that he just didn't measure up. He
felt so undeserving of even being in this doomed interview.*

"*Lois Lane, Clark Kent," Mr. White introduced them.*

"*Nice to meet you," she quickly mumbled as if she didn't want
anything to do with him before continuing her line of reasoning.
"Anyway, he worked on the messenger--"*

"*Wait," Mr. White cut her off again. "Wait a minute, what
happened to that mood piece I gave you about the razing of that
old theater on forty-second street?"*

"*I wasn't in the mood." She shrugged. "Perry, this is big.
I'll need some help."*

"*You weren't in the mood," Mr. White said to no one in
particular. He seemed to ponder her point. "Now look Lois,
you've always had a nose for news, so I'll give you this one.
Take Kent here."*

*Clark's heart leapt. Was Mr. White offering him a job instead
of firing him? Lois looked him up and down with a frown on her
face, measuring his worth. She barely kept her eye roll to
herself before turning back to Mr. White.*

"*No," she said, her nose crinkling even more after catching a
whiff of his inadequacies. "He's a hack from Nowheresville. I
need someone who can *actually *help," she emphasized, stealing
another look at him with disdain dripping from her sneer. Clark
fought to conceal the flinch from her scathing words and pointed
glance that cut through him. He had never felt so low. How could
one person have so much of an effect on him?*

"*I know I lack experience," he heard himself say to them both,
"but I'm a good writer and a hard worker, and I have plenty of
experience doing research."*

"*See?" Mr. White agreed, turning his attention back to his
work. "I'm sure he'll be the perfect person for the job. He's
yours. Do whatever you like with him."*

*She harrumphed, but a commotion at the window caught her
attention, and she seemed to completely forget about him.*

"*I -- I gotta go, Chief. I'll catch up with you later." She
turned and rushed to the door but stopped in the threshold to
turn to him. "Kent, be at my desk in ten minutes," she
ordered.*

*He didn't have time to acknowledge the command before she was
gone. He turned back to Mr. White, who had a mischievous grin on
his face as he looked at his papers one more.*

"*Thank you, sir," Clark said. "I appreciate you giving me
this chance to prove myself."*

"*Yeah," he acknowledged, not looking up. "Oh and in between
doing whatever Lois tells you, I want you to take that theater
razing story."*

"*Certainly, sir." Clark nodded and got up to leave the office,
ready to work himself to the bone and prove he could hack it in
this town.*

"*And Kent?" he said, leveling him with a glare. "Don't let
me down."*

###

*Don't let me down.*

Perry White's words hung in the cool evening air as he
remembered with despair his time at the Daily Planet.

Clark shook his head, closing his eyes. He *had* let Mr. White
down. He'd let *himself* down. Working at the Daily Planet had
been his biggest dream, and it had proven to be impossible.

Everything Lois thought about him turned out to be true. He
hadn't been willing to admit it then. He was willing to admit it
now. And that was why there was no way that Clark was *in love*
with Lois. None whatsoever. She only made him feel lowly and
unworthy. She had looked at him with disdain and disappointment
before they'd even worked together.

Of course, Lois *was* right in the end. This was the part he
hadn't wanted to tell Lana, the part that made him look
unreliable, dishonest, and disgraceful. Even so, he allowed the
reverie to continue.

###

*September 13, 1993*

*Lois had only just begun working on the story that morning when
a bedraggled man pushed his way into the newsroom, attempting to
give a packet of papers to Lois. His claim that the messenger
would explode caught her attention, and her stubborn
persuasiveness allowed her to win Mr. White over on investigating
it further for a story.*

*The messenger launch was scheduled for the following day. Lois,
being the hard-nosed investigator that she was, went straight to
the source, dragging Clark along with her. They made their way to
EPRAD with the intention of speaking with someone in charge and
asking about this report the estranged Dr. Samuel Platt had told
her about.*

"*I'll ask the questions," Lois spat as they walked quickly to
the entrance. She wasn't watching where she was walking while
digging in her purse for her press badge.*

"*Yes, Ma'am," Clark acknowledged.*

*She caught her foot on a crack in the sidewalk, and Clark
instinctively reached out to grab her elbow. She jerked her arm
away from him as if his touch had hurt her.*

"*Don't help me!" she practically yelled.*

"*Sorry," he quickly apologized, making a mental note that Lois
was not comfortable with unwanted help.*

*She didn't say anything more. She found her badge and made her
way to the entrance. The guard posted there pointed them in the
direction of the office where someone would be able to help them.
Here, her best efforts were stymied. All they were able to get
was that Samuel Platt was in fact fired for behavior in violation
of their safety protocols.*

*That afternoon, Lois charged Clark with organizing the papers
that she was given that morning by Dr. Platt, but he wasn't able
to make sense of any of them. Clark didn't really feel like he
was doing much to help. He just followed Lois wherever she went
like a puppy. He finished his first day of work feeling like a
let-down, like he was in over his head. Maybe the next day would
be better.*

*The following morning, the launch of the Messenger began on
schedule as the newsroom watched. Tragedy struck when, at the
last minute, fires broke out and the whole spacecraft exploded in
a tower of flames, killing the crew aboard. Was Dr. Platt
right?*

*Lois's reaction to the scene was one of anger and resolve. The
next place she dragged Clark to was the home of Dr. Samuel Platt.
His home was not much of a home but more like an abandoned
warehouse, cluttered and disorganized. While Lois asked a few
introductory questions, Dr. Platt shuffled around, pulling pieces
of paper from random places and throwing out vague answers. Lois
then asked him about the report he supposedly sent to a Dr.
Baines, head of the Messenger project at EPRAD.*

"*Do you have a copy of the report?" she asked while Clark
stood helplessly in the background.*

"*What kind of scientist would I be if I didn't keep copies of
my reports?" he responded without stopping his strange
behavior.*

*Clark wondered what kind of scientist could live in such
clutter. Everything Dr. Platt said sounded like the ravings of a
mad man. He claimed to have been drugged by the people at EPRAD,
and that was why he was so scattered brained, but Clark wasn't
so sure that was it. Why would such a notable company drug an
employee? Clark really didn't understand any of this and was
considerably worried that Lois was barking up the wrong tree. Mr.
White had said she was the 'best damned investigative
reporter,' but Clark was beginning to have his doubts.*

*Later that afternoon, they received a box full of papers from
Dr. Platt. Lois added the task of going through them to Clark's
list of things to do. Yet again, he was unsuccessful at
understanding what he was looking at. Lois hadn't even tried
understanding the reports and decided they should try speaking to
someone at EPRAD again.*

*This time when they arrived, Dr. Antoinette Baines was willing
to speak to them. Lois and Clark followed the guard in and were
led into Dr. Baines's office as evidenced by the name on the
door. It was a large office given that Dr. Baines was the head of
the project. One entire wall was lined with filing cabinets, and
stacks of papers were scattered on the table in an open part of
the room. Lois took a seat in the chair facing the desk, reached
into her satchel, and dug around for something.*

*Clark took the seat next to her and scanned the office. On the
desk, he noticed a picture of a young woman with a small child
and picked it up for a closer look. He assumed the woman was Dr.
Baines. The child had the same blond hair and bright smile and
resembled the woman enough to be a relative of some sort, but
Clark wasn't sure which.*

"*My brother," a voice stated from behind. Clark turned around
to see Dr. Baines standing in the doorway with a clipboard in one
hand and the other hand in the pocket of her baby blue lab coat.
Lois pulled a pad of paper out of her bag and set her bag down
forcibly, casting a warning glare at Clark.*

*Was Lois trying to intimidate him? He turned back to the
picture, trying his best to ignore her. "He looks very happy,"
Clark noted, nodding to the picture.*

"*He was," Dr. Baines said sadly as she walked toward her desk,
set her things down, and then stepped next to the chair Clark sat
in.*

*Clark immediately caught the past tense and frowned. "What was
his name?" he asked. He heard Lois clear her throat but
continued ignoring her. Dr. Baines would be more willing to talk
to them if she felt some connection to them.*

"*Fletcher," she said with a sad smile. "He died a few years
ago." She briefly looked at the picture and then walked around
her desk to sit in her comfortable captain's chair. "He's my
inspiration."*

"*Inspiration?" Clark inquired, noting the irritated eye roll
he saw in his peripheral vision indicating Lois's great
displeasure. Thankfully, she didn't seem to want to interrupt
him right now. She was probably just jealous that Dr. Baines
would talk to him, a 'hack from Nowheresville,' as she so
eloquently put it.*

"*Yes," she answered. "His condition was one that we are
planning to study on the Prometheus Space Station." She leaned
forward in her chair and clasped her hands on her desk. "He
didn't make it long enough to see the results of our efforts,
but there are plenty of others just like him that we will be able
to save one day."*

"*I'm sorry to hear that," Lois cut in with feigned sympathy,
likely trying to take control of the conversation. "Dr. Baines,
what can you tell us about the sabotage? What is EPRAD doing to
protect the colonists going up on the next launch?"*

*Dr. Baines looked up at her, as if only just now realizing Lois
was in the office. "I... I'd like to tell you more about the
sabotage, but first, I need to know that you will be protecting
your source."*

"*Yes," Lois eagerly assured her. "We always protect our
sources at the Daily Planet."*

*Dr. Baines sat up straighter and appeared to think about whether
she could take Lois at her word.*

"*It's okay, Dr. Baines. You can trust us," Clark put in.*

*Lois scooted to the edge of her seat, hungry for the
information. "Do you know more about the sabotage Dr. Platt was
talking about?" Lois asked directly.*

"*I do," Dr. Baines said hesitantly, "but I can't risk it
getting back that I was the person who leaked the
information."*

"*Of course," Clark said earnestly, trying to reassure Dr.
Baines.*

*Lois looked at him then with an expression that screamed, 'This
isn't fair, I'm supposed to be doing all the talking.' But he
ignored her and held eye contact for as long as Dr. Baines would
allow.*

*Clark could see Dr. Baines considering this a moment before
nodding and continuing.*

"*Dr. Platt is responsible for the sabotage," Dr. Baines
admitted, relief relaxing her features. "He filed a report
saying that cooling devices were necessary for the function of
the spacecraft with forged evidence. The change was made, and
that is why the spacecraft blew up."*

"*Do you have a copy of this report?" Lois immediately asked.*

"*Yes," Dr. Baines opened a drawer in her desk and pulled out a
large ring of keys. She got up and walked to one of the many
filing cabinets and opened the drawer on the bottom in the
leftmost cabinet. Lois enthusiastically turned to watch Dr.
Baines retrieve a manila envelope and walk back to them, handing
the folder directly to Lois. "It's all there."*

"*Why are you giving this to us?" Lois asked, a look of
confused disbelief on her face.*

"*Because the next launch is in danger..." Dr. Baines opened
her mouth but didn't speak. Instead, she looked toward the
window. After taking a deep breath, she continued, "Platt is
blackmailing me, trying to pin this on me instead." She turned
sorrowful eyes to Clark who read her distress in them. This was a
cry for help.*

"*I see," said Lois with a smirk on her face. "And you expect
us to believe--"*

"*Thank you, Dr. Baines. We better be going," Clark interrupted
before Lois could say the most skeptical thing imaginable.
"We'll take a look into this file. Thank you." He quickly
stood up, shoving the chair he was sitting in backward. Lois
reluctantly stood when he reached for her arm and pulled her up.
"We'll let you know if we have any questions about
anything."*

"*You're welcome," Dr. Baines said, finding his eyes. Clark
was sure she was sending him a secret message with her facial
expression, except he wasn't sure what it was.*

*As they walked out to the sidewalk to call for a cab, Lois
slapped Clark's shoulder with the folder she was holding. "You
idiot," she berated. "She was lying and if we'd stayed in
there long enough, I could have gotten her to admit it."*

"*I think she's telling the truth," Clark argued. They reached
the sidewalk and turned to face each other.*

"*Really?" she sneered, lifting her eyebrows expectantly. "And
you know this because... why?"*

"*I can't say," Clark admitted. "Her eyes weren't lying."*

"*Lying eyes," Lois mocked. She snorted and shook her head.
"You've got to be kidding me. Her eyes were lying through their
lashes, and I can see she pulled the wool over yours." She
stabbed him in the chest with her finger. "And I'll show you
once we've gone through this forgery of a report." She turned
to look down the street and whistled for a cab.*

"*What makes you think it's a forgery?" Clark asked. A cab
pulled up in front of them, and he opened the door for Lois to
get in.*

"*Because that was too easy," she said. She lowered herself
into the car before he climbed in beside her.*

*Her crossed legs and arms screamed that she was in no mood to
discuss it. Clark chose not to say anything. Not agreeing with
Lois wouldn't go over very well. And perhaps the document
they'd received would shed light on the truth.*

*Back at the planet, they sat shuffling through the papers that
Dr. Platt had given them along with the report that Dr. Baines
had just put in their hands. As Clark read over them, he heard
Lois grumble something about forgery again. He looked up to see
an irritated expression on her face.*

"*This is ridiculous," she said as she abruptly stood up,
slamming the papers down on her desk. She grabbed her coat from
the back of her chair and slid one arm in. "I'm going for some
lunch." She didn't even look at him as she briskly walked
toward the elevator doors, putting her coat on the rest of the
way. He watched as she stepped into the elevator on the left,
letting out an exasperated grunt.*

*As the doors closed in front of her, the elevator on the right
opened. Dr. Baines stepped out and immediately made eye contact
with him as she twisted her fingers together in front of her. He
stood from his chair and walked to meet her.*

"*Can I speak with you?" she asked. "Somewhere private?" she
clarified as she looked nervously around the busy newsroom.*

"*Sure, we can go in there," Clark responded, pointing toward
the conference room. He followed her in and closed the door
behind him. "What is it, Dr. Baines?"*

"*Antoinette, please," she said, then seated herself in one of
the chairs at the conference table and looked at her hands
resting in her lap.*

"*Antoinette," he repeated as he propped himself on the smaller
table along the wall.*

"*I figured Lois wouldn't believe the report I gave her," she
started. She looked up to meet his eyes, and he noted the slight
redness around hers. "She thinks I'm in on it, doesn't she?"
she asked.*

"*She does," Clark confirmed, "but I don't." He pulled the
chair next to her out and sat down.*

*She smiled at him, shyly. "I brought this." She pulled an
envelope out of her purse and presented it to him. "It's the
original report documenting the need for heating devices."*

*Clark took it from her and turned it over to open it. "Why
wasn't it with the rest of the papers you gave us?"*

"*I... hid it," she confided. "When Platt started blackmailing
me, I felt like I needed something... just in case." She hung
her head and shook it. He felt sorry for her. Having to deal with
the uncertainty and fear of coercion would be difficult to cope
with.*

"*Thank you," he said, "for bringing this to me." He pulled
the paper from the envelope and began scanning it.*

"*Don't tell Lois I gave it to you. Please?" she pleaded.
"Tell her someone else sent it to you."*

*He considered it and then nodded. "I will. You seem quite upset
about all this."*

"*I... am," she revealed. "I tried to stand up to him at
first. This project means so much to me. I don't want to see it
ruined. But I ..." her words trailed off, and she closed her
eyes as a single tear slid down her cheek.*

"*It's okay. I'll protect you," he assured her, placing his
hand on her knee. "Lois doesn't need to know where this came
from."*

"*Thank you," she said and smiled up at him. "I have to go."
She stood quickly and all but ran to the elevator.*

*He watched her leave as he made his way back to the table he and
Lois had been working at. He strategically placed the envelope
where Lois would see it and went back to looking through the
papers as he waited for Lois to return from her lunch. He hadn't
made much progress before she stomped back to the table and
roughly set her things down.*

"*Well?" she demanded.*

"*I'm sorry," he apologized, "this just doesn't make much
sense." He looked at the envelope then at her. "This came for
you while you were gone," he said, indicating the envelope
Antoinette had delivered.*

*He watched as she opened the envelope and read over the
document. Her eyes grew wide, and her mouth opened in surprise.
"Clark, did you read this?" she said excitedly.*

"*No," he denied, busying himself with the papers closest to
him. "What is it?"*

"*It's the other half." She looked up at him with shock on her
face. "You were right, Baines was telling the truth." She
showed him the document, and he barely looked at it. "This is
the report showing the need for heating devices. Dr. Platt
authorized cooling devices. He went against the report."*

*Clark smiled inwardly, satisfied that he was able to get Lois to
see his side of things without having to argue. Lois immediately
went to work writing up their findings. She wrote the entire
story, not allowing him much input. Mr. White was impressed, and
the story printed in the next edition. Even though Clark had only
helped on the story, he finally felt like he'd accomplished
something important.*

*But then things went completely wrong. The next thing Clark
knew, they were being subjected to hours of questioning by the
police regarding the death of Dr. Platt. An investigation by a
special task force at the police department had found the
opposite of what they'd reported and later found Dr. Platt dead,
apparently killed. They wanted to hold Lois liable for printing
false information.*

*Clark's world was crumbling around him. The treatment he and
Lois had received from their colleagues and Mr. White was nearly
unbearable. He felt like he had single-handedly ruined her career
as well as his own. The only thing he could think to do was to
take all the blame upon himself and agree to quit his job at the
Planet. It would never be enough to undo what had happened, but
he knew it was for the best. The next time he saw Lois was when
he collected his things from his desk.*

*As he walked past her desk toward the exit, she turned her head
away, glancing over her shoulder, obviously trying not to look at
him. He was ashamed of himself but paused next to her desk. "For
what it's worth," he started, knowing she really didn't care
what he had to say, "I'm sorry... about... everything." His
paltry apology would never be enough.*

*She shook her head and breathed out. "Worthless," she spat at
him. "I never want to see you again."*

###

And yet Lana said he was talking to this woman, telling her he
*loved* her. Clark shook his head in confusion. Failing so
miserably had permanently affected Clark. Maybe he'd never been
a great reporter, but that incident proved that investigative
journalism was something he would never be able to do. He'd done
okay these last two months with Lana encouraging him, but before
that, he kept screwing up other stories wherever he went. That
was really why he kept getting fired.

How he wished he could talk to Lana about this, to understand
what things he'd said in his sleep. The things she described
just didn't match what he was thinking, what he remembered. But
Lana had made it clear she didn't want to or couldn't help him
figure this out. He felt stuck. If only Lana would just tell him
what he'd been saying in his sleep.

***

Chapter 4

Lois and Scott made their way to the dance floor, the first lines
of *Unforgettable* wafting around the room. Nat King Cole. She
smiled up at Scott, who, at six feet, towered over her. He had
recently developed a Nat King Cole fascination, around the same
time he started wearing a treble clef around his wrist. His new
interest was enough that he was constantly singing songs around
her. She asked him about it the other day and was touched to hear
that he did it in memory of his sister.

"It's been a fantastic evening, Lois. Something this enchanting
could only come from the mind of a woman. You really outdid
yourself," Scott complimented, smiling at her.

"It was nothing. You know Lex, I had plenty of assistants to
take care of most of it for me. But I do like telling other
people what to do." Lois smiled smugly. In reality, she would
happily boss anyone around, but she preferred the do-it-yourself
approach in many circumstances. "And you. You seem to be feeling
better lately. I'm glad to see it."

"Yes, thank you." She saw the grief flit across his eyes and
dissipate. "But I don't want to bring down your evening. Tell
me. Where did the idea for the decorations come from?" he asked,
looking around.

The dance floor was off to the edge of the large room, surrounded
by vines and twinkling lights. Speckles of light moved in waves
around the floor. Between the dance floor and the rest of the
ballroom was a replica of the fountain that had served as a
backdrop for Lex's proposal. The lights danced on the surface of
the water, making the entire room sparkle.

"It was Lex's idea." Lois looked around at the decorations
then, admiring the effect they had on the room. It felt cozy,
safe. "He wanted to recreate the night we got engaged."

"It must have been an outside affair because I feel like we're
dancing under the stars." Scott swung his arm in a small arc
gesturing to the room.

Her smile bloomed even brighter. "That is exactly what I was
going for! And yes. We went for a walk under the stars at night
and found ourselves in the park. It was very romantic, even when
it started raining." Lois smiled at the memory of the
engagement.

He nodded toward one of the decorations and began, "Your paper
lanterns make me think of a song." He let out a small chuckle.

"Nat King Cole again?" she asked, smiling. "What song?"

Scott pulled Lois closer and leaned in as they continued dancing.
He took a deep breath before he began singing softly, "*It is
only a paper moon*..."

Lois knit her brow as a strange sensation came over her. Her
field of vision clouded, and she felt like she was falling. She
tried to make sense of what she was feeling, gripping Scott for
support. The song sounded so familiar and brought to mind images
she couldn't quite make out.

Scott continued serenading her. "*Hangin' over a cardboard
sea.*"

As Lois's eyebrows deepened their frown, she shook her head to
clear it. She stumbled the next steps of the dance. Scott caught
her and held her hand firmly, keeping them both moving with his
other arm around her waist.

"Lois, stay with me," he instructed, suddenly serious. She saw
him glance around and then focus on her eyes. "I've got you.
Keep dancing," he said as if her life depended on it.

What was happening? She felt sick to her stomach and images of a
man flashed before her eyes. She caught glimpses of the night Lex
proposed again, but this time the face of the person expressing
all those heartfelt emotions was someone else. Someone familiar.
It only took her a moment to recall the name.

Clark Kent.

###

*May 21, 1995*

"*You chilly?" Clark asked as he put his arm around her
shoulder.*

"*No," Lois replied. That shiver was related more to her
harrowing experiences earlier that day than the cooling
temperatures of the evening air as a storm approached. She
reached up to lace her fingers with his, feeling his warmth
course through her.*

"*Lois, I've been thinking," Clark began tentatively.*

"*Me too," Lois put in. She had made some astounding
realizations and had been thinking at length about them.*

"*What about?" he asked with genuine interest.*

"*You first," she insisted. Would he tell her on his own?*

"*Okay," Clark said with a smile as he lowered his head. He
paused for a moment, composing himself before speaking.
"Sometimes... you think you're immortal." He watched his feet
as they walked. "You start to think that the people around you
are too. And it just takes a second to realize how... wrong you
are... about everything."*

*They stopped there in the middle of the walkway, and Clark
turned Lois to face him.*

"*Listen," Clark began, looking Lois straight in the eye.
"What I'm trying to say, Lois, is I almost lost you and I...
feel... ashamed." He looked to his left and sighed.*

*Lois leaned to her right to be able to look into his face,
trying to bring his attention back to her. What was bothering him
so? "Ashamed? Why?" she asked as she searched his eyes.*

"*I kept pushing you away even when I promised I'd stop."
Clark looked directly into her eyes. "If you died without ever
knowing why, I'd never be able to forgive myself. Because I love
you."*

*Lois smiled at this profession and reached to run her fingers
through his hair and caress his face. She could tell he had more
to say and held in her response until he was finished. *Tell me*,
she pleaded silently. He took her hand and led her to the
fountain they had neared while walking and asked her to sit.*

*A flash of lightning brightened their surroundings, and a crack
of thunder rent through the air. She looked up as the impending
storm broke free.*

*Clark lifted his face to the falling rain and with exasperation
in his voice declared, "Come on! Give me a break!"*

*She laughed at the irony of the situation. "You want to go
back?" Lois asked while ducking her head to avoid getting rain
in her eyes.*

*Clark looked back at her with fierce determination. "If the
earth opened up at my feet, I wouldn't move until I'd said
this." Without averting his eyes, Clark knelt in front of Lois
and took her hand in his.*

*Lois saw what was coming, and her heart beat rapidly in her
chest. Was she ready to hear these words? Was she ready to answer
them? Would he share his secret first?*

"*Lois," Clark began, rain dripping from his hair into his
face, "will you marry me?"*

*Lois sucked in a breath as Clark brought out an intricate,
beautifully designed diamond engagement ring.*

###

Confusion was all Lois could feel. Clark, the man who had ruined
her career, was asking her to marry him? This made no sense. Lex
was the one who had proposed, wasn't he? She was just thinking
about it moments ago as Lex twirled her around the dance floor.
Now it felt like the dance floor was falling out from beneath her
feet. Why would Clark be invading this memory? And what secret
was he hiding?

"Let them come," she heard Scott say. He was still holding her
firmly and moving about the dance floor. "It will take some time
to remember everything. You might..."

The fog crowded her vision further, and she didn't hear the rest
of his sentence as another vision overwhelmed her.

###

*September 13, 1993*

*Lois had only just begun working on the story that morning when
a bedraggled man pushed his way into the newsroom, attempting to
give a packet of papers to Lois. Before she could put any pieces
together, the launch time approached, and the Messenger exploded
just as he'd predicted.*

*When she asked Perry for a task force, he gave her Clark Kent,
an unseasoned reporter who was new to the Daily Planet. And while
she complained, she was forced to allow it and asserted herself
as the leader of this pairing. But he proved himself useful. He
trusted her intuition and was willing to work. His response to
her suggestion that they stay late at the Planet that night to
work on the story was a simple, "I am all yours."*

*She could see the possibilities he was considering in his eyes,
but after everything she'd worked for and been through, it
wasn't a risk she was willing to take. She even had to correct
him later that evening after he'd brought some amazing Chinese
food for them to share. "Don't fall for me, farm boy," she
warned him. "I don't have time for it."*

*Once they were on the verge of proving that sabotage had caused
the destruction of the Messenger, they went to speak to Dr.
Platt, only to find something amiss. Clark was protective as they
discovered his dead body, then supportive and comforting while
they waited for the police to arrive. He even called out a cop
who had been tastelessly making fun of the situation.*

"*The man's name was Samuel Platt," he said, poking his finger
into the cop's chest. "He was brilliant, a scientist, and
someone who cared about others. Under the circumstances, I don't
believe that kind of humor is appropriate." She watched in awe
as he expressed authentic sorrow.*

"*Sorry, buddy," the cop apologized, adequately chastised.
"Really, I'm sorry."*

*As the cop walked away, Lois approached Clark. "Are you ok?"
she asked, looking into his face to see for herself.*

*His mannerism exuded regret as if he took what had happened
personally. "We should have known," he insisted, blaming
himself. "We should have protected him." Did he realize he
wasn't at fault here?*

"*How?" she asked.*

*He shook his head. "I don't know," he admitted, "but we
should have done something."*

*Lois studied his face for a moment, surprised by his anger and
remorse. She could see he needed help focusing on what mattered,
and she would lead him. "Look, Clark, all we can do now is try
and prove him right. We have a lot of work to do." She glanced
down at her watch. "It's only five thirty. Why don't we try
and get a few hours of sleep and I'll come by for you about
nine? Okay?"*

*She left him then, hoping some time away from the story would
allow him to pull himself together. She needed her new partner to
help prove that Dr. Platt was right, that the messenger was
deliberately sabotaged.*

###

But Clark was nothing but an irresponsible, untrustworthy
reporter who put her in the worst position of her career. Wasn't
he? Hadn't he given her information that was incorrect? Didn't
he ruin her career at the Planet? She had started working at LNN
as a result of needing a new career.

Two different scenarios of the same event nowexisted in her
memories. What was happening to her mind? *Remember*, Scott had
said. Was she remembering something?

Her head felt like a jumbled mess, and she wasn't sure what to
believe. She tried to look around and focus on the faces in the
room but found she couldn't see any of them clearly. Were they
even real? She turned her head back to Scott who wore a relaxed
smile and appeared to be saying something.

"...glad it worked. I'm sorry, but you can't..." She heard
the relief filling his voice that drifted away as another --
where they memories? -- flooded her vision.

###

*September 22, 1993*

*She had snuck onto the Messenger space shuttle to be part of the
story instead of merely reporting it from the sidelines in her
ever-present quest for acclamation. Once buckled in and ready for
the launch, she heard a faint beeping that didn't fit with
anything else. She unbuckled herself to investigate, concerned
that no one else seemed to notice it. Finding the source of the
sound revealed a small box with a countdown timer with less than
a minute remaining.*

"*Oh, my God. It's a bomb!" Lois exclaimed, her voice growing
louder. "It's a bomb! Someone, help! It's a bomb!" The
shuttle shook as the engines ignited, and she ran to a window to
see if she could find someone, anyone to help. "Help!"*

*Thinking she'd have to do something to get the attention of
someone, she looked around the small area she was in and found a
pair of pliers. She made her way quickly to some exposed wires,
knowing that an incorrect reading on any of their consoles in
mission control would tip them off. She hacked at a few wires,
sparks flying.*

*She heard the announcement of suspending the countdown. They'd
received her plea.*

*But the timer continued to count down.*

*She stood there, looking at the bomb, wondering if there was
anything she could do stop it and thinking about how being part
of this story just might kill her. She'd been too tenacious this
time. Too ambitious. Too foolhardy. And it would be over soon.*

*21 seconds.*

*Just then a man in a strange, brightly colored costume walked
into the room, looking determined, and found the bomb. Unable to
process what she was seeing, she merely stepped out of the way
and watched in astonishment as he inspected the bomb.*

"*He--Hey! Get away from that!" she warned. He popped the
device open and pulled at the pieces. "What kind of lunatic are
you? That's a bomb!" He took one of the pieces and put it in
his mouth as she stared in shock, her mouth agape.*

*Immediately, a small explosion sounded from his chest, and he
let out a belch and pounded on his chest. "Excuse me," he said
politely and smiled genuinely.*

"*What the hell are you?" she asked in disbelief.*

*He didn't answer the question but smiled instead, as if he
wasn't sure how to answer the simple question. As they stared at
each other, the rest of the crew and passengers gathered and
stood in an equal state of awe. He spoke with confidence and
explained that he was 'a friend' before he proved it by lifting
the shuttle into orbit and returning her to the Planet.*

*He held her gently as they flew, his cape billowing in the
breeze that passed them. He held her as if it was nothing to him
but with such care to ensure she was both safe and comfortable.
The prolonged closeness induced sensations in her that she
couldn't explain, and she was mesmerized by the sheer
unlikeliness of all that had just happened.*

*When they landed in the newsroom, he looked deep into her eyes
as if he knew more about her than she knew about him. She
searched his face, looking for any sense of recognition. She saw
all those characteristics she had felt as she was flying in his
arms -- care, gentleness, concern. She could see he had what must
be the purest heart any person could ever have. She didn't want
him to leave.*

"*I-- I think considering the fact I saw you first, you owe me
an exclusive," she said as quickly as her mind was able to form
words. An interview would undoubtedly guarantee more time with
him.*

"*Is that the rule?" he asked, smiling. She was thoroughly
distracted by his smile. It blazed, the corners angling in
mischief. She couldn't see anything else.*

"*Well, no, but I'd appreciate it very much," she replied
honestly, returning his smile.*

*He gave a sort of half laugh as he turned to fly away. She stood
there, stunned.*

"*Wait!" she suddenly called. "How do I find you?"*

"*I'll be around," he said. And with that he flew away.*

"*Did you find out what the "S" stands for?" Cat Grant asked
as she ran up to Lois.*

"*Super..." Lois said breathlessly. "Superman!" she named
him.*

###

That fluttery infatuated feeling emerged inside her, and she
*knew* that this was the real Superman. He was not the distant,
unemotional... unreal superhero that she had despised for some
unknown reason. Now she recalled all the small things, endearing
looks, and expressive mannerisms. He had treated her like she was
someone special.

What was happening? Scott had said she would *remember*
everything. But what was she remembering? Stories she'd read,
dreams...actual events?

"Lois?" she heard Scott say. But all she could do was shake her
head as she struggled to gain some control over her thoughts. But
the foggy feeling only increased.

She was unsuccessful, and this time she saw Clark down on one
knee proposing again. A bizarre mix of excitement and trepidation
coursed through her as she gave in to the memory.

###

*May 21, 1995*

*Clark looked back at her with fierce determination in his eyes.
"If the earth opened up at my feet, I wouldn't move until I'd
said this." Without averting his eyes, Clark knelt in front of
Lois and took her hand in his.*

*Lois saw what was coming, and her heart beat rapidly in her
chest. Was she ready to hear these words? Was she ready to answer
them? Would he share his secret first?*

"*Lois," Clark began, rain dripping from his hair into his
face, "will you marry me?"*

*Lois sucked in a breath as Clark brought out an intricate,
beautifully designed diamond engagement ring.*

*She smiled as she looked back at his face. "Who's asking?"
she countered. "Clark Kent?" She pulled his glasses off. "Or
Superman?"*

###

Superman? Her mind reeled. Clark was *Superman*? Clark *was*
asking her to marry him?

Her vision was almost completely clouded now. She tried to
reconcile all that she thought she knew with these ... memories?

She was married to Lex, celebrating an anniversary with him. But
she *remembered* something else? Clark had proposed to her in the
same manner, and she *knew* he was Superman. She wanted to ask
questions, to understand, but she couldn't even form even one
coherent question to ask.

"The worst will be over soon." Scott was still there. And he
understood, she realized.

Before she was able to think on that more, she was whisked away
into another memory.

###

*May 21, 1995*

*Lois stood in the newsroom of the Daily Planet, scanning several
documents that had just printed, when Clark was notified of a
phone call and stepped away. She continued to peruse the document
in her hand and looked up to see fear come over his features. As
he pulled the phone away from his ear, she could see in his
stance that the phone call was related to what they were working
on.*

"*That was him." The look he gave her was filled with dread as
he set the phone down, and it was all the confirmation she
needed. "It was Jason, wasn't it?"*

*Clark shook his head the slightest bit. "Lois don't--"*

"*What'd he say to you?" she interrupted, refusing to let him
push her away now. She was in this with him. He closed his mouth
with a pleading look on his face. "Clark, what'd he say?" she
demanded.*

*He looked around the room gravely as if contemplating what to do
and then clasped her shoulders, leading her to the conference
room. He released her as they entered and pulled the door closed
behind him.*

"*He wants..." he began, shoving one hand in his pocket, "you
dead... in thirty minutes..." He looked to the floor. "Or he's
going to kill my parents."*

*She released the breath she'd been holding, and he looked up at
her face as she looked away and turned toward the table. They had
been rash, pressing too hard, and now she would be asked to pay
the price. "It's Nigel, we got to close." She moved closer to
the table and fidgeted with the papers still in her hand.*

"*Lois, I want you to get out of town, get on a plane, get as
far away-" Clark began his desperate attempt to keep her safe,
sputtering the words out without pausing between sentences.*

*But her attention was elsewhere as she considered their options.
A thought struck her, and she interrupted him, "No." She put
her hand on his chest to get his attention as he continued
pleading with her. "No," she repeated more firmly.*

"*Lois, please." She could see the trepidation in his eyes and
knew what she must do.*

"*No," she said again, making eye contact with him. "I have an
idea."*

"*Lois, please," he begged.*

*She was filled with a sense of confidence as she forged ahead
regardless. "I want you to tell Superman to meet me at my
apartment as soon as possible." She reached for his shoulders
and pulled herself up to him.*

"*Lois--" he started to say, but she silenced him, kissing him
squarely on the mouth and pushing her body against his, doing her
utmost to infuse him with her confidence. As she pulled away, she
looked into his befuddled eyes.*

"*Everything's going to be alright," she assured him. And with
that she left.*

*She knew it would only take moments for her to get to her
apartment and talk with Superman. This was important to Clark,
and she had no doubt that Superman would be there before she was.
She was right.*

*As soon as she opened her door, he stepped in through the open
window, and she closed the door.*

"*Superman," she pleaded, "I need you to freeze me."*

"*Freeze you?" Superman questioned, his voice full of
disbelief.*

"*Yes," she confirmed. She began pacing her living room, even
though she felt a bizarre sense of calm. "Like cryogenics. You
know, people who fall into frozen lakes and they get revived? You
could freeze me with your breath." She began walking toward
Superman. "Fast. I've seen you do it a hundred times." She
stopped a few feet in front of him and met his eyes. "And then I
would look like I was dead, and you could take my body--"*

"*Lois!" he interrupted, shaking his head. "Do you have any
idea how dangerous that is? You could have arterial ruptures,
permanent brain damage..." He released a heavy breath, then
continued, eyes locked to hers, "Lois, you could die."*

*A niggle of doubt tried to worm its way in, but she pressed on,
determined to help. "Yes, I could die," she acknowledged. She
took a seat on the couch. "But Clark's parents will die unless
we help them." She looked up and saw the hesitation on his face.
How could she make him understand how important this was? He sat
down, angling himself toward her. "Please, Superman," she
pleaded. "You haven't seen him. You don't know what he's
going through. He needs me! And I have never needed you more than
I do right now. You just can't turn me down. You can't."*

*Superman released a breath and closed his eyes. She met his eyes
when they opened and dared him to say no.*

"*Alright," he finally agreed. Then, he stood up slowly.*

*As the realization of what was about to happen sank in, she
stood up and released a shaky breath. There was one more thing
she needed to say, just in case. "If... anything happens," she
breathed, "tell Clark that I love him."*

*Superman's eyes seemed to see something in her, but what, she
couldn't say. "He knows. But I'll tell him. Close your eyes,"
he instructed.*

*She did. She heard him release another breath and felt his
finger slip under her hair at her ear. He pressed his palm
against her cheek and a glaring truth seared her skin as she
reached for that suddenly familiar hand. Was that why he'd
looked at her that way moments before, when she confessed her
love of... him?*

*Her eyes flew open to find a face she knew intimately, and she
was shocked at the revelation. "The way you just touched me,"
she whispered.*

*He stepped back, this time with a look of knowing on his face.
"Close your eyes," he instructed again. And she did so, knowing
that... Clark... would keep her safe.*

###

She instantly recalled everything about that moment, the turning
point when she knew Clark was Superman. The smell of his hand.
The warmth it lent her. The heat in his eyes. The sound of his
grateful voice. Grateful, though grateful didn't quite capture
what he must have felt at realizing that she would do this for
him without even having to be asked.

And yet, Lex was now in so many of these memories. He was
invading, changing them into something ... repulsive.

Her memories of things from the past two and a half years now
seemed to be in bits and pieces, as if her mind, her memories had
been run through a blender. She wondered if she had even
remembered everything. What else could be missing?

The fog covering her vision cleared just enough that she could
see Scott. How much time had passed? He continued to dance with
her, a lifeline between this ridiculous flood of memories that
contradicted all that she had believed and the reality around
her. He had somehow... unlocked it all... on purpose? What did he
know?

She opened her mouth to ask but was engulfed once more.

###

*November 20, 1995*

*They stood alone just inside the closed entry hall, preparing to
go outside and address the crowd that had come to see him off.
Lois felt a mixture of emotions. She was confident he would
return and wanted to believe that everything would be just fine,
yet her heart ached knowing that he would be away from her and
that she would be powerless to help him if anything happened. His
hands rested on her shoulders as she stood inches in front of him
with her hands on his chest, memorizing their last moments
together.*

"*I'll miss you," she said quietly as she leaned her head
forward to rest on his chin.*

"*I know," he whispered. He moved his arms to encircle her and
touched his lips the top of her head.*

"*I wish I knew how long you'd be gone. That would make this so
much easier." She threaded her arms around him and turned her
head and laid her ear on his chest. As close as she was, she felt
so very far away, needing to be closer, to hold on and never let
go.*

"*I know," he said, squeezing her tightly.*

*She looked up to see his face and the tears in his eyes matched
the anguish in her heart. How would she manage without him? She
knew it was necessary. This was something he had to do. She had
encouraged him when he wasn't sure. Reminded him of why he
needed to do this. Put his needs above her own.*

"*Lois, I will never stop thinking about you." His eyes
remained transfixed on hers. "You will be what keeps me going,
what keeps me grounded... what pulls me home." He leaned in
then, slowly savoring this last moment together.*

*She tilted her face up to his, holding his eyes, and brought her
arms around to put her hands on his face. He pulled her in as
close as possible. One arm wrapped around her waist, the other
rested on the back of her neck, trapping her to him passionately,
pressing them against each other, their eyes locked.*

"*I love you, Lois," he breathed.*

"*Clark--"*

*He prevented her from saying anything more with a kiss so full
of passion that there could be no questioning where his heart
lay. She poured her own heart into the kiss as well. She could
stay here forever in his arms, safe and secure.*

*But no, he was leaving her. What had she been thinking to insist
he go? She choked on her breath, suddenly bereft, and a muffled
sob split them apart.*

"*What if you can't get back?" she asked, terrified, her fears
and worries taking over. "Clark, I--"*

"*No, Lois." He shook his head and quelled her fears with his
courage. "Don't think like that. I will* *be back, and we'll
live out the rest of our lives, together, you as my wife and me
as your husband. We'll start a family. And grow old together."
He looked into her eyes as he said this, and she could see it.
All of it.*

*The images were beautiful. She never thought this kind of life
would ever be something she wanted -- a home, a family. But with
Clark, she wanted it all. And she knew it would be so.*

"*I have to be going now," he broke in, cutting through the
images.*

"*Please," she begged. She turned her face downward and closed
her eyes, willing circumstances to be different. "Just a few
more minutes."*

*His finger brought her chin upward, and she found herself
falling into his deep, brown eyes. "Anything," he said and
pressed his mouth to hers once more. She felt herself being
lifted from the floor. He was everything to her, and she loved
him so deeply. She wondered how it could have ever taken her so
long to realize just how important he was.*

*As he pulled himself away from her, she could see the anguish it
caused him to do so and closed her eyes at the sorrow on his
face. He squeezed her hands in his and slowly released them. She
heard the door open and applause filtered in from outside. She
opened her eyes just in time to see him turn away from her and
step toward the door.*

*Tears sprung free from her eyes, and a small sob escaped her.
She could run and stop him... But no one could know, and the open
door was a barrier that prevented her from going to him once
more. She stood there, watching in slow motion as he walked away
from her. He stopped and turned to look at her and mouthed the
words 'I love you' once more. She nodded and wrapped her arms
around herself, suddenly aware of the cold in his absence. The
door closed, and she dropped to her knees, weeping.*

###

Clark.

He was gone.

She could feel the impressive sense of loss even though she
couldn't recall why he had left. And now, she found herself
trapped in a tangled mess. He wouldn't be able to save her.

She felt a tear slide down her cheek.

The mist lifted and allowed her to finally focus on Scott's
face. She saw him smile softly as he whispered, "Clark Kent
didn't leave, Lois."

A lump formed in her throat. Could he possibly know what she'd
just seen in her mind? Did he *know*? "What?" was all she was
able to croak out.

"He is alive and... well," he verified, continually swaying
with the music. She recalled then that they were still on the
dance floor, the sounds of the bridging instrumental in the
middle of *Unforgettable* finally registering in her ears. Had it
really only been a minute or so?

The words of the song began again and doused her in irony. She
had forgotten... everything. Her heart raced, and her breathing
was shallow.

"Can I see him?" she asked breathlessly.

"No," he said with a sorrowful look in his eyes. She began to
feel queasy, and it became difficult to hold herself upright.
"Lois, you can't let anyone know you've remembered," he
advised. "You have to stick with how things are now." At her
defeated look, he smiled. "Just until we figure out how to fix
it all."

"Who... who...?" Lois started to ask, her thoughts still
muddled. She tried again, "How...?" She shook her head and
finally settled for, "What happened?"

"Lex."

His one-word answer was more than enough explanation and not
enough at the same time. The man who claimed to love her, who had
been sharing his life with her, who was here reveling in their
marriage, had warped her perception of reality. His conduct and
demeanor had been so genuine. But Clark belonged in those
memories. She was sure of it.

"He reprogrammed your memory," Scott continued. "Yours *and*
Clark's. And anyone else's he needed to so that he could get
what he wanted."

Her mind caught some of the words of the song they were dancing
to. '*Unforgettable, in every way...*' The music lent an eerie
feel to her unraveling memory. She swallowed in an effort to stem
her rising discomfort.

"Perry and Jimmy?" she wondered aloud, glancing at Scott
again.

"Almost everyone in the US," he admitted. Scott's eyes
revealed his concern, but he kept a light smile on his face as if
none of this was happening. He was her friend, an ally, she had
no doubt about that either.

She shook her head, trying to comprehend the magnitude of all
that she'd just learned.

"How?" she finally managed to ask.

"I can't answer that now, but you are fully aware of just how
bad this situation really is. Do you still remember all the...
false things?"

She slowly nodded. So many conflicting memories floated in and
out of focus. Some that included Clark would skirt past and then
shift to feature Lex and then back to Clark again. Superman
looking lovingly into her eyes before acting completely aloof and
detached, then sweeping her off her feet. She felt nauseous.

"You must keep up the act," Scott instructed. The grave look on
his face told Lois that there was likely more at stake than she
realized just now, causing her to wonder just how dangerous the
situation could be.

"I will," she whispered, swallowing to contain the disgusting
feeling of foreboding that threatened to overwhelm her.

Scott slowly led her back to Lex just before the song ended,
grasping her arm to support her as she wobbled. Had all that
really happened in a matter of minutes? It felt like days had
gone by as her world had shifted. Suddenly Lois was worried she
wouldn't be able to do this. Who could she turn to? She felt so
alone and helpless.

"Act like your head hurts," Scott quickly whispered to her as
they neared Lex.

"Not a problem," she whispered back. Placing her fingers on her
right temple and rubbing slowly, she closed her eyes as Scott
guided her.

"Lex, it seems as though Lois has developed a headache," he
said with genuine concern in his voice. "I think she might need
to go home."

Scott passed her hand to Lex who took it with such gentleness
that Lois started. Her eyes opened, and she hoped he couldn't
see the uncertainty she felt. Who was this *husband* of hers?

Lex's eyes looked so genuinely concerned. "Lois, are you
alright?" he asked, the concern also evident in his furrowed
brow and gentle tone.

"I-- I'm okay," she stuttered. Would Lex see through her? "I
think all the preparing for this party took more out of me than I
realized." She laughed half-heartedly. "I just need to lie down
for a bit."

Lex reached out to set his glass down and then grasped her other
hand. "I'll take you home right now, then."

His touch felt suddenly foreign. "Oh, no, Lex," she countered.
She needed some time to collect herself, figure out what was real
and not real, how to act in what seemed like a parallel universe.
"I couldn't take you away from this. One of us should stay."
She forced a small smile to reassure him, hoping her obvious
nausea would cover any indication that she was terrified of what
would happen.

"She's right Lex, we can't have both guests of honor leave the
party early. I'd be happy to see her home for you," Scott
offered.

"Well." Lex paused for a moment to consider this. "I suppose I
could stay... if you are sure you are alright." He squeezed her
hands again and the confusion threatened to overwhelm her once
more.

"I'll be fine," she said, inclining her head to avoid his
eyes. She lightly squeezed his fingers to reassure him.

"Alright." Lex gave her a sympathetic smile and kissed her
forehead where she'd been rubbing it.

His touch to her temple brought up memories of intimacy that she
knew without a doubt were true, and the intense feeling of guilt
overwhelmed her to the point that she knew she would lose her
dinner if she didn't leave soon. She pulled her hands from
Lex's and rushed for the doorway, hearing his last bit of
instructions to Scott. "Take our car, Scott. She'll be the most
comfortable in it for the ride home," he said. "And stay with
her until I return."

Just outside the doorway, she emptied the contents of her stomach
into the terra cotta planter of a ficus tree that was brought in
for the occasion. She felt horrible both physically and
emotionally. How had this happened? Was she the most despicable
woman having an affair with another...? Would she find Clark?
Would he forgive her for this?

As she stood there leaning on the wall with her head angled
upward and her eyes closed, considering whether her stomach had
any more to rid itself of, Scott came up next to her and placed a
damp napkin in her hand. She wondered again what role Scott
played in this muddled predicament. He was on her side, she knew,
if he had intended to release those memories tonight and tell her
that some evil plan was underfoot. But was he really whom he
claimed to be?

"The car will meet us at the side door, down this hall," Scott
said, gesturing away from the main exit and the possibility of
questions and stares.

As soon as they exited the building, the cool, crisp winter air
restored some of her composure, but she knew it would be some
time before any of this made sense. Scott helped her into the
seat before getting into the car himself and they headed...
home?

***

Part 2 -- "...when first we practice to deceive." -- Marmion
(Walter Scott)

***

Chapter 5

September 15, 1995

Lex was patient. It was a gift to have such a high level of
patience. One of Lex's other talents was character assessment.
His instincts told him that this Mayzik had something very
valuable to offer him. Lex had been planning this conversation
for some time. Calculated networking and persuasion had led up to
this moment. Today Lex would discover something that would alter
the course of his life. He could feel it in his bones.

Rightly so, he had been limited to few and far between
interactions with fellow inmates of the prison. Not because he
was violent, but because the justice system would be foolish to
believe it couldn't be swayed by a mastermind like Lex Luthor.
Naturally, though, he had managed to finagle things to suit his
needs and finally found not just one guard who would orchestrate
a meeting between them, but two.

Carl Buchner, the guard assigned to supervise Lex's comings and
goings most days as well as this one, led him to the common room
and released him. A look crossed between them, and Lex turned his
attention to the other door across the room that Jason Mayzik had
just come through. Carl would be gone for two hours, giving him
ample time to get what he needed from Mayzik. Lex gave a discreet
nod to Travis Knapp, the other guard doing his bidding.

Lex had lost everything.

His fortune was gone.

The disenchanted Lois Lane held nothing but pity for him.

His status in the city he had called his own had been taken over
by his arch nemesis.

All his time in prison thus far had been spent stewing in his
hatred of their beloved super-powered *refugee*. The alien had
stolen everything from him and reduced him to nothing but a
common convict, forced to spend his time behind bars when he
should be the one in control. He hadn't even been lucky enough
to bypass his fate, his chance thwarted by the quick actions of
the oh-so-virtuous Superman.

But now he'd been afforded a second chance -- an opportunity to
get back what was rightfully his. And he would do so with the aid
of Jason Mayzik, a jeweler's son sent to prison for stealing
from his own father and blackmailing Superman. How fortunate for
Lex that his long-avoided imprisonment resulted in an opportunity
to associate with a man after his own heart. Lex had heard of
Mayzik's intense hatred of Superman and was immediately tempted
to learn more. His unfailing ingenuity produced this break in his
bad luck to pursue an acquaintance with as much privacy as two
inmates in a medium security prison could ever hope for.

"Mayzik," Lex greeted. "How is your time in confinement
going?" Lex gestured to a couple of arm chairs facing an empty
table near the edge of the large main room.

"Lex Luthor," Mayzik said, seeming only mildly startled at the
meeting. Lex smiled inwardly as he watched Mayzik's defenses go
up immediately. They sat in the chairs Lex had indicated. The
side view that these seats afforded Lex was one he preferred.
"I'd say it is going better now. It is a pleasure to meet such
a famous criminal."

"Criminal?" Lex allowed the mild offense he felt to show.
"That term has such bad connotations. Surely there is something
better."

"Yes, well," Mayzik eluded answering. "I've always admired
your *ambitions* in life... and sought them for myself."

"You flatter me, Mayzik," Lex said flatly. "Let's cut to the
chase then, shall we?"

"Certainly." Mayzik relaxed back into the chair and waited as
if he had the upper hand.

"I understand you and I share a keen hatred of a particular
superhero that likes to run around in tights and a cape," Lex
began.

"You'd be right on that account," Mayzik acknowledged.

"I'd love to know more about how you managed to blackmail
Superman, and successfully, as it's told to me."

"I'm sure you would." He smiled as if he held the world in his
hands. "I've been thinking about the offer your... man...
disclosed to me." Was that surprise Lex saw? Was Mayzik
*surprised* that even in prison Lex Luthor would have people to
do his bidding? Or was it the offer that surprised him?

"And was it to your liking?" Lex inquired.

Mayzik seemed to think about it for a moment before a grin teased
the corners of his mouth. "Actually, I'm not sure it's
adequate."

Lex was absolutely certain it was entirely adequate. Even so, he
was only mildly offended by this. After all, Mayzik was
essentially a child, young and inexperienced. His father died
before adequately training him in the art of successful business
dealings. *Patience*, thought Lex.

"And what would be required to make it adequate?"

"Double." Mayzik nonchalantly examined his fingernails.

"You must have quite the morsel of information."

"Obviously," Mayzik sneered. "I assure you it is well worth
the expense."

"I'm sure."

"Look, if you don't care to hear what I know, I'm sure I can
find someone else--"

"That," Lex interrupted, holding up his hand, "won't be
necessary. I agree to your terms." He conceded for now, knowing
full well that if he didn't get what he wanted, he would find
another way to get his money's worth. "Just be aware that I do
not put up with being let down."

"Excellent. And you *won't* be disappointed."

"Good then. Shall we proceed?" Lex was running low on
patience.

"Blackmailing Superman was actually quite easy," Mayzik began.
"You merely need to know the right pieces of information."

"Naturally. And that would be...?" Lex pressed.

"I was blessed with a hoarder for a father, you know. Took
forever to go through all his junk after he died. One day I came
upon this ratty old book. I can't explain what caused me to give
it a second glance, but I did. Read it cover to cover, actually.
It was a wealth of information -- predictions, all of them
true."

Lex waited patiently, intrigued.

"It was like reading Nostradamus but specifically about
Metropolis and its inhabitants... including Superman."

"Do you still have this book?" Lex asked.

"Sadly, no," Mayzik said with a shake of his head. "That
blockhead Superman destroyed it."

"How, then, am I to believe what you are about to tell me?"
Information was one thing, but unsubstantiated information was an
entirely different beast. Mayzik could make up anything, and
while eventually Lex would know, he would rather not have his
assets compromised while he awaited verification.

"Early on, after the appearance of Superman, you were in
possession of a... device. I don't need to mention how you came
to be in possession of this thing. It was a globe actually, of
the planet Krypton."

Lex's eyebrows rose and when Mayzik turned to see him, he gave a
half smile and continued.

"This globe would occasionally glow, and an image would appear
to whomever was holding it, sharing information about Kal-El,
which even you realized was Superman. Kal-El's planet exploded
shortly after he was born. You were quite surprised to learn that
his parents sent him to Earth as a baby. Did you know these
images were viewed by both you and Superman? The globe was...
is... somehow connected to him."

"*This*... was in your book?" Lex asked in disbelief.

"Is there another way I could know that?" Mayzik went back to
investigating his fingernails.

"Didn't Nigel St. John work with you to blackmail Superman?"
Lex considered it possible that his former trusted associate may
have given that bit of information to Mayzik, since he was there.
He would like to think better of his confidante, but after all,
Nigel did double-cross him in the end.

"Funny thing, your *man-servant*," Mayzik began, setting his
hands down on his knees. "Despite his double-crossing of you
recently, back then he still behaved like a loyal puppy. I
couldn't get him to tell me anything."

"I'm glad to hear it." It appeared that Lex had no choice but
to believe him, for now. But more importantly, this would also
mean that the next bit of information Lex would leach from Mayzik
would likely be true as well, provided he wasn't lying about
Nigel. "So, your information is accurate?"

"Every last bit. It was how my father was able to become so
rich. He merely invested based on what was in the book. He was
*not* the hardworking type he showed everybody."

"I see. So, something from this book prompted you to blackmail
Superman?"

"Nah, he was just a means to an end. I figured I could rid the
world of Superman and Lois Lane as well as steal my father's
fortune. I just let Superman know what information I had, and he
was *so* willing to keep it hidden."

Lex quickly worked to mask his indignation at hearing that Mayzik
was after Lois as well. It was looking like Mayzik would see much
less than double his original offer.

"I see. And some of this information was rather important?" Lex
asked hastily. This conversation was taking much longer than he
would have liked, the unnecessary banter grating on his nerves.

"Oh, it was the kind of stuff a celebrity would never want
printed."

Lex cocked an eyebrow and waited.

"Nothing like illegal behavior or an embarrassing illness... but
a secret identity," Mayzik said slowly. "Connection. Relatives,
so to speak. Possible hostages, as it were."

"You mean to tell me that Superman masquerades among the masses
as a normal person?" Lex could hardly contain his excitement at
what he was hearing. Mayzik knew Superman's secret identity!

"Yes, and you won't be surprised to hear who!" The twinkle in
Mayzik's eyes was exhilarating, like a toddler ready to spill
the beans on a surprise. "Or maybe you will be! Either way...
it's too bad Superman destroyed the book, or I'd tell everyone.
You are the only one in a position to believe me, with the sordid
history the two of you share..."

Only excessive experience on this end of a business deal would
allow Lex to so easily mask his intense fascination. He merely
lifted his eyebrows and waited for the anticipated bit of
gossip.

"*Clark. Kent." *The way Mayzik enunciated each part of the
name emphasized the immense significance of what he was saying.

Lex mulled the name around, assimilating it with what he knew
about Superman and Clark Kent. Suddenly, all the pieces fit
together. Kent was so obviously never present when Superman was.
Superman was equally never present when Kent was. The obsequious
reporter that had taken his place, *his place*, in Lois's heart
did have similar features to his only worthy adversary. He
imagined the meek Kent removing his disguise and assuming a
different demeanor.

Superman had been hiding in plain sight.

How stupid everyone was to be fooled by a pair of glasses.

Then another thought dawned on him.

Lois.

She and Kent were dating. He'd noted that when he returned from
the dead. While she still had an eye for the super hero, she
seemed to be ogling the simple man just as much, if not more.
Thanks to Carl, he was aware that the two were now an item,
practically engaged. Did she know? She must have for she was no
fool. How long had she known and how did she find out?

Lex felt his upper lip curling in rage at being so easily fooled
and fought to maintain his composure by taking a slow breath. It
would not do to allow Mayzik to see how his information had
affected him. Recalling that Mayzik had unwittingly given up the
goods before receiving his due, he smiled.

"Well, that is quite fascinating," Lex replied, nodding in
thanks. "You'll find your reward as per our original agreement
waiting in the manner discussed."

"What?!" Mayzik said irately, shocked at the possibility of
being outwitted, Lex suspected. "You agreed to double."

"Yes, and when I can verify your information, you will see the
rest." A manipulative smile spread on Lex's face.

Mayzik grimaced but then sat back, defeated. "I suppose I have
no choice at this point," he said.

"If only your father had been alive longer. He might have been
able to teach you some of his business skills," Lex mocked.
"It's been a pleasure doing business with you." With that, he
nodded to Knapp.

As Knapp came and collected Mayzik, leading him away, Lex
remained in his chair for a few minutes longer, meditating over
what he'd just learned.

*Clark Kent is Superman.*

Knowing that Kent had somehow won Lois's heart made Lex sick to
his stomach. He hated to be bested, even more so when it didn't
make sense -- Kent had *nothing* to offer Lois. It was salt to an
open wound to learn that his arch enemy was one and the same.
That charlatan had stolen *everything* from Lex. His remaining
time in prison would not be wasted but instead would be rather
valuable. He would use all of his time planning a new and
miserable existence for *both* of his enemies.

***

September 25, 1995

It was a brilliant plan. As soon as he thought of it, he knew
that it would not only be successful, but it would also provide
him with an infallible way to ensure that Lois Lane would be his
and his enemy Clark Kent, a.k.a Superman, would suffer a
miserable existence for the rest of his pathetic life. Eager to
begin laying the foundation for such an ingenious strategy, he
first found the right people to participate.

Carl had become Lex's trusted assistant out of necessity,
replacing those who had previously held the position. It was only
coincidentally that Carl became one of Lex's full-time guards,
but Lex welcomed it as soon as he realized just how easily Carl
was manipulated. In a short time, Lex was able to coax him into
doing his bidding. Lex was doubly pleased with how well he was
able to do the things requested of him, as if he had missed his
calling in becoming a prison guard when he clearly was destined
for a life of immorality. If only Lex had met Carl before being
incarcerated.

In the time since the fateful conversation with Mayzik, Lex used
Carl to assemble a team of evildoers with the necessary skills to
complete his agenda. Carl began scheduling meetings for him as
soon as was reasonable so that no one would be the wiser. In
addition to reviewing notes from Carl on those with the innate
evil and know-how to be capable of accomplishing what he wanted,
Lex began working on how he, and anyone else he needed, would be
released from prison. Lex's first opportunity to test Carl's
ability to choose accomplices came in the form of a meeting with
another inmate who, like Mayzik, had something to offer Lex.

"He's a genius," Carl told him days before. "So persuasive
that he convinced a board of directors that his research was
ethical when it was probably the most unethical proposal yet."

Jay Hightower was a neurologist and a researcher. He was also
gifted with engineering skills and was apparently highly
persuasive. Despite that influence, Hightower, too, found himself
in the same medium security prison as Lex. And this was the
perfect opportunity for Lex to pick his brain and recruit him
into his masterful plan.

Lex sat waiting for the arrival of his next appointment,
scheduled in the same manner as his first. Lex mulled over his
ideas, thankful that his memory was razor sharp and the need to
write things down to keep track of them was nonexistent. The
opening of the other door grabbed his attention.

A tall, thin man walked into the room, carrying himself with
confidence, and sat in the chair next to Lex, propping his feet
up on the table in front of them. Intelligence exuded from his
pores, and Lex realized that Hightower was much younger than he
was expecting. Yet Carl insisted that this would be the guy to
get things done. This meeting would certainly serve as a test of
Carl's abilities as much as Hightower's.

"Dr. Hightower," Lex greeted him. "It's a pleasure to meet
you." Lex extended his hand.

Hightower grasped his hand and gave it a firm shake.
"Likewise," he said with a smile. "Buchner says that you need
someone to... invent something for you."

Lex was impressed by the handshake and furthermore by the young
man's eagerness to get to the point. This conversation would go
much better than the one with Mayzik. A smile spread across his
face.

"Yes, well, I believe I've already invented it, but I lack
certain skills to actually turn it into a reality," Lex began.

"Well, your offer was a little unclear to me." He turned his
head to look at Lex before asking, "Will you also be supplying
the materials, or will I have to procure those myself out of what
you intend to pay me?"

"Everything will be provided," Lex answered. "It will be
similar in nature to working at a research facility. You will
submit requests for approval, verifying their necessity. And, so
long as you are making adequate progress, everything you wish
will be granted."

Hightower maintained eye contact with Lex for a moment, his brows
drawn, assessing, before he nodded his agreement. "Tell me what
you want."

Lex took a page from Hightower's book and got right to it. "I
want a machine that can erase select memories, change others, and
implant new ones into any number of people." He watched
Hightower's eyes widened as he said this and held his gaze.

Hightower turned to face forward again as his facial expression
changed repeatedly until he said, "Alright..."

"Can you do it?" Lex asked.

"Yes..." Hightower confirmed slowly.

The hesitation in Hightower's voice was unconvincing. "How
difficult is it to replace memories?" Lex asked.

Hightower's changing emotions seemed to settle into confidence
in the end, and he turned his body to face Lex, placing his knee
on the chair. "It isn't difficult to remove them," he began,
illustrating with his hands, "but putting something in its place
is..." Lex lifted an eyebrow and waited for Hightower to
continue. Hightower shifted in his seat to face forward again.
"So far, there have always been... unusual side effects due to
the methods used." He waved his hand in the air as he said,
"I'd have to come up with something entirely new."

Lex nodded. "Yes, this procedure must be permanent and
unnoticeable--"

"I was working on that before I was... detained," Hightower cut
in.

"Excellent," Lex said honestly. "I also require you to come up
with a way to use this device on a... substantial audience."

"How substantial?" asked Hightower, peeking at Lex.

"Everyone we can reach," Lex stated bluntly.

"Excuse me?" Hightower's eyes went wide again.

"It must also be customizable depending on the person its used
on," Lex added.

"Let me see if I get what you're saying. You want to pick and
choose the memories that various people keep, lose, or have
changed?"

Lex nodded. Perhaps Carl had exaggerated the usefulness of this
*Dr. Hightower*. He couldn't risk giving the job to someone who
doubted the possibility of completing the task.

Hightower frowned at him. "Luthor, this is a large task, *huge*.
I don't even know how much time or money that would take. Are
you in a position to wait if needed, to increase the budget as
well??"

Lex would have rolled his eyes if he weren't as experienced.
Instead, he simply met Hightower with a direct stare. "Of
course. Can you do it?"

Hightower sat back in his chair and propped his feet back up on
the table. "Absolutely," he said with a tone that finally
convinced Lex he had found his man. "I'll need assistants and a
place to work. How exactly do you plan on getting me out of
here?"

"Done," Lex stated with authority. "And, leave that to me. The
less you know the better." Lex shifted in his chair to be able
to extend his hand to seal the deal.

"Okay," Hightower said, shaking Lex's hand again. He moved to
stand and asked, "Are we done then?"

"Yes," Lex said as he also stood. "I'll not be seeing you
again, mind you. When you believe you've achieved the goal I've
set for you, contact Carl. He will be waiting to hear from
you."

"You got it. Thank you, Mr. Luthor. It's been a pleasure."
Hightower gave a slight nod of his head before turning to the
door where Knapp stood waiting to escort him back.

With a satisfied sigh, Lex walked to the window that overlooked a
courtyard below. Character assessment was indeed his greatest
gift. In the short time he spoke with Hightower, he could tell
that this idea of his was something that even Hightower found
alluring. And that would provide additional motivation beyond
anything Lex could offer him.

Lex lowered his head and peeked over his shoulder at Carl who
stood at the door through which they would leave. He gave a
slight nod of approval and laughed internally at the man's
inability to hide his sense of relief. Carl and Hightower had
passed their first tests. Confidence in his plan solidified and,
without hesitation, he moved on to the next step.

***

September 29, 1995

A beep from the computer at his lab station jarred Scott
Ferguson, a research assistant at S.T.A.R. Labs, back to reality,
indicating that it had finally completed the hours of analysis it
had been working on. Wiping his bleary eyes and setting his book
down on the table, he sat forward and squinted at the screen,
trying to make sense of the data he saw there. Then, his
grey-green eyes widened.

Scott had been working this boring job for almost two years, and
only now was it about to get exciting. It was a nice job, but
only about twenty percent of the time was it interesting and fun.
The other eighty percent of the time was filled with meetings,
paperwork, and endless hours of waiting for some part to come in
or a specialist to arrive to fix something only one person in the
world even knew existed. His favorite part of that eighty percent
was that he could surf the internet or read a good book as he sat
waiting on something.

But today would fall into the twenty percent.

While this was close to the kind of job he'd always wanted, he
certainly hadn't come by it in any sort of traditional manner.
His run-of-the-mill childhood was uneventful at best. His family
was just like any other -- his father, a laborer in a factory
that manufactured pieces that would eventually be assembled into
refrigerators, his mother, a traditional stay-at-home mom,
himself and his younger sister.

He would have worked in the same factory as his father if it
hadn't been for an aptitude test he'd taken in high school. He
didn't quite have the intelligence to be an engineer, but the
test pointed him in the direction of nuclear technician. After he
graduated high school with the rest of his peers without any
particular honors, he began a vocational program to become a
nuclear operator.

His path had changed, however, when his father died unexpectedly,
leaving Scott to take care of his mother, whose recent injury in
a car accident kept her from being able to work, and his sister,
who was not even in high school yet. He could no longer justify
going halfway across the country for an entry level job. And with
no prospects in the vicinity of Metropolis, he worked part time
positions where he could get them, all unrelated to his
particular skill set. None of the positions he held paid enough
and desperation soon led him in an altogether different
direction.

He had just picked up another part time job as a cashier at a gas
station just down the street from his apartment. He had started
chatting with one of the other employees, John, who made pizzas
in the evenings. Ever in a good mood, ready to joke about
anything, it lifted Scott's spirits to be able to hang out with
him.

A few weeks into the job, John had made an attempt to further
break the ice. "I know what it's like to be working paycheck to
paycheck," he'd said. "Struggling, hoping to make ends meet. I
can take you to meet someone who can help." And the next thing
Scott knew, he had been convinced to meet John's other boss, the
man responsible for John's seemingly perpetual good mood.

Nothing could have prepared him for that first introduction. The
building where they had met looked like a perfectly upstanding
place complete with potted plants and secretaries manning the
front desk. Mr. Jones was a charismatic salesman who presented
the job opportunity in the best of light and easily won Scott
over with the benefits and pay that promised him an easy means to
take care of his mother and sister.

It wasn't until later that Scott even realized just exactly what
he was being asked to do. The tasks had been small and benign at
first -- deliver this item to this address, pick this package up
and hand it to that person -- but they became progressively more
suspect in nature -- prevent this person from arriving, cut that
cable -- but he was always paid well for everything he did. Well
enough that he was able to keep one part time job for appearances
and relax knowing that his family would have everything they
needed.

After many years of doing someone else's dirty work, an
associate of Lex Luthor's approached him with a proposal to take
on a new position. The job was simple, he would work as a lab
technician and do whatever the scientists he worked with told him
to. And if anything regarding Superman ever crossed his path, he
was to share that information with Luthor. The thought of doing
something more in line with what he'd envisioned as a kid
appealed to him, and Scott took him up on the offer almost
immediately.

Unfortunately for Luthor, during that first year, nothing came
up. And then Luthor died. It was lucky that Scott was able to
keep his job. If only Luthor had stuck around longer. During that
second year, not only had Superman gone blind, but then the lab
next to his installed a vault to house kryptonite! When Lex
Luthor managed to come back from the dead, his position picked
right back up, and he'd told Luthor about the kryptonite and the
research they were doing with it -- trying to stop it from
affecting Superman. He continued in the position with a very
generous increase in pay despite Luthor's capture.

But now, this! *This* would be an interesting bit of information
to share with Luthor. It could even spell a nice bonus on his
part.

The S.T.A.R. Labs Astronomy team had been tracking a large object
moving through space around a red star, in another solar system
like ours. Only the orbit of this object was as if it had been
rocketed from its original motion. It revolved around that red
sun in a strange and very elliptical path. Too big to be a comet
or asteroid, the astronomers ran tests to determine what it was.

Scott was running the emission spectra analysis this morning. The
results he now saw were incredible. Right there in the middle of
the graph was the precise set of blips signifying the presence of
kryptonite in this object.

Which meant it was somehow related to Superman.

Scott shoved hard against the floor, pushing his rolling lab
stool the ten feet to his desk where he grabbed his phone. He
pressed a single button on the phone and was immediately
connected with Carl Buchner, Luthor's newest right-hand man.

"Carl, I've got something for Luthor," he nearly yelled into
the phone with his level of excitement so high. He started
tapping his pencil on the table, listening.

His brow furrowed. "What? No, I can't leave right now--" He
stopped mid-sentence. "Oh... I see." He stood up from his
stool, pacing. "Um... Okay, I'll be there in fifteen."

He set the phone back in its cradle and scribbled a quick note to
his supervisor. He set the note on the other desk in the room and
grabbed his jacket from the hat stand next to the door. With a
quick glance back at the computer screen across the room, he
left, closing the door behind him.

***

Fifteen minutes later, Scott walked up to the door of St.
Dominic's Catholic Church on the corner of Bessolo Blvd and
Trumbell. It stood with its bell tower at the intersection's
corner, and its west facing entrances on either side of the huge
stained-glass window were composed of geometric shapes and
flowers. Scott shook his head at the audacity of Luthor's use of
a place of God as a meeting location for what were surely sinful
acts.

He knocked on the heavy door and waited. Carl answered it, and
together they went inside. A small narthex fronted the main
sanctuary, separated by a beautiful tiled archway. They didn't
enter the sanctuary but instead went through a heavy door at the
south end that led them down a spiral staircase, as if entering a
dungeon.

"Glad you could make it," Carl interrupted his thoughts as they
descended the stairs. "We're reducing your hours at S.T.A.R.
Labs so you can work here part time. Hamilton understands the
nature of your family emergency, and you'll be coming here half
days to take care of your dad."

"Considering my dad died when I was twenty-one, that will be
weird," Scott laughed.

"Did I say dad? I meant stepdad," Carl said, laughing as well.

"Of course..." Scott shook his head.

They reached the bottom of the staircase and stopped in front of
another heavy door. Carl pulled a set of keys out of his pocket
and inserted a very old looking one into the equally old looking
key hole. The door groaned in protest as it opened. Carl extended
his hand as he said, "Please, come this way and allow me to
introduce to you your stepdad."

Scott smirked. "Ha."

The room they entered didn't match the door or the rest of the
church in the least. No more intricately designed stained glass
or expertly carved wooden features existed. This room was stark
and sterile feeling. Storage cabinets and countertops lined every
wall separated by fume hoods spaced around the room. On the
opposite side from where they'd entered, a few doors stood
closed. A mixture of large work tables and smaller desks were
sprinkled about the center of the room. It reminded Scott of some
of the science labs he'd seen in college catalogs, and he was
excited even more by the proposition of doing something related
to his skill set.

But the music.

Scott recognized the song only because it had been in a rerun of
some old show his sister was watching just the other day. Nat
King Cole was the singer, but he didn't know what the name of
the song was. It wasn't bad music, but it was much louder than
Scott thought necessary. One of the doors opened and a man, who
Carl must have referred to as his stepdad, walked in.

"Oh, sorry," he said, startled. "Let me turn that down." He
reached for a knob on an antique radio that stood out in the room
now that Scott had noticed it. "Hi," he greeted, extending his
hand. "Dr. Jay Hightower."

Jay Hightower was a tall, thin man dressed in what appeared to be
something of the business casual nature underneath his spotless
white lab coat. He looked much too young to be running a job like
this. In addition, Scott couldn't see why a person like
Hightower would be listening to Nat King Cole. Wasn't that kind
of music more popular with the older, more retired crowd?

"Hello." Scott shook the proffered hand. "I'm Scott. Looks
like I'll be working for you for a while."

"Great," Jay said, obviously pleased. "What are your
qualifications?"

"What do you need my qualifications to be?" Scott shot back,
raising his eyebrows playfully. Having no idea what he was here
to do in the first place, he wasn't sure what qualifications
would be relevant.

"Funny," Jay quipped, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Look, I have to go," said Carl, turning for the door. "I'll
catch up with you guys every now and then for updates." He shut
the door, and Scott heard the key turn in the lock.

"Did he just lock us in here?" Scott asked as he quickly turned
toward Jay.

"No, that's just to keep people from coming in." Jay took a
step toward one of the desks and pulled a key from its top
drawer. Handing it to Scott, he said, "I hope I don't have to
tell you not to lose it."

Scott shook his head. "So, what do you need me to do?" he
asked, slipping the key into his pocket as he looked around at
the materials and equipment strewn about the tables.

"Are you any good at electronics?" Jay cocked his head toward a
table covered in circuit parts and soldering equipment.

"Pretty good." Scott walked to the table and began picking
through the things on it. This would have been his second choice
had he not gotten into the nuclear operator program. He'd put in
a lot of practice in school on his own time just because he loved
it so much.

"If I give you a schematic, can you build it?" Jay asked.

"Oh yeah," he replied confidently. This was beginning to look
better than his job at S.T.A.R. Labs.

"Great. Schematics are over there, materials are over there, and
you can work at this workstation here." Jay gestured to these
locations as he spoke while simultaneously making his way to yet
another table covered in papers. "I hope you don't mind the
music. It helps me focus."

"Not a problem." Scott picked up one of the schematics from the
table Jay indicated and took it to the work station. "Is this
Nat King Cole?" he asked.

"Yep," Jay answered simply.

Scott began picking over the circuit pieces scattered over the
table, organizing them. "You know, I always thought electronics
is where I should have gone," he said trying to make
conversation.

"That's nice."

"What are you a doctor of?" Scott tried again.

"Neurology."

Jay leaned over his papers and began scribbling on one of them.
Scott took the hint, and they worked in silence for a time. The
schematic he was working on was crudely drawn but easy enough to
follow. Lacking expert knowledge, he couldn't tell what it was
or what it did. It didn't resemble any of the ones he'd worked
on in the vocational program. All the pieces he needed were there
at the table, and he soldered away, Nat King Cole blaring in the
background. Maybe he'd bring headphones to listen to his own
music tomorrow.

Or ear plugs.

"How'd you get interested in this kind of music?" Scott asked
as he finished the last connection on the circuit. "Seems a
bit... old... for you."

"My grandparents." Jay was scrawling quickly with one hand
while flipping through a stack of papers with the other. "I
don't think I ever went anywhere with my grandfather without Nat
playing in the car."

Scott stood up and crossed to the table Jay was working at. He
couldn't tell from the mess of diagrams, calculations, and
nearly illegible handwriting what he was looking at. He also knew
it didn't matter. Luthor wanted him working here and paid him
well to do it without question.

"My little sister likes that kind of music, though I have no
idea why." A little over ten years younger than Scott, his
sister was sweet and innocent. He didn't dare tell her who he
worked for or what he really did for a living. Scott shook his
head to focus on the task at hand. "Here's your first circuit
board. Where should I put it?

"Over there is fine," Jay said, indicating a large cabinet that
had its doors hanging open. "You should be happy your sister has
such fine taste in high quality music," he added with a smile.

Scott placed the circuit he'd just finished on a shelf in the
large cabinet with several other circuits that were already
finished. "I just don't know where she got it from," he said,
thinking about how this was going to be a boring job if they
didn't find anything interesting to talk about.

***

Chapter 6

October 13, 1995

After Carl deposited Lex at the appropriate window in the
visiting area of the prison, Lex watched him continue to the edge
of the room to stand watch. A quick glance revealed a petite
woman with long brown hair and metal-rimmed glasses seated on the
other side of the window who appeared to be irritated about
something. She sat drumming her fingers loud enough to be heard
through the window on a tiny spiral-bound pad of paper. Lex hid
his amusement and gave her a quick nod, which she returned, and
made himself comfortable in the seat before picking up the
handset linked to the one already waiting in her hand.

Dr. Florence Montgomery began her career working for the
mysterious Bureau 39, an agency that, according to the
information Lex had gathered, was wary of a certain alien
superhero. The agency hired her as a materials scientist though
her degree in biophysics would have suggested another position.
Additionally, after the dismantling of Bureau 39, she had gone to
work for the police department as a weapons expert.

"You'll like this one," Carl said as they reviewed notes last
week. "That Bureau 39 hand selected her. I didn't even get half
of the first sentence out before she agreed. I thought she'd
start cheering the more I talked. She's... enthusiastic, to say
the least."

That she had eagerly accepted the invitation to meet with Luthor
before he'd even finished explaining what it was all about
filled Lex with excitement as well, and he looked forward to this
meeting. Since it couldn't be held privately while also taking
place in the visiting area of the prison, they'd worked out a
code beforehand that would allow them to speak freely.

Her eagerness was so great that she immediately began talking
before the receiver reached his ear. "Mr. Luthor," she began.
"I was under the impression this meeting was supposed to start
at nine forty-five. It is now nine fifty-three. I hate being made
to wait."

"My apologies," he said sincerely, understanding the irritation
he first observed when he arrived. "I have little control over
the schedule here."

She pursed her lips and took a deep breath. "Very well," she
continued. "Let's get this over with. I understand you need
someone to figure out how to adjust your furnace's function."
She tipped her head downward to peer at him over her glasses.

Lex was taken aback by her straightforward manner and entertained
by her expert use of the code at the same time. He smiled and
answered slowly, "Yes, that's--"

"Is this to be permanent or temporary?" she asked, interrupting
him, clearly impatient and ready to begin.

So rarely was Lex in a position to be interrupted, he wasn't
immediately sure how to handle it. "Well," he began again,
"I'd prefer that to be an option--"

"Temporary then," she declared, interrupting him again, "but
controlled by you." She looked down at her pad and scribbled
furiously.

"Yes," Lex confirmed, trying not to let his own impatience with
her unsophisticated behavior show. "Now, Dr. Montgomery--"

"Flo, please," she interrupted once more, not looking up from
her pad as her pencil moved erratically around on the page.

"Flo," he repeated.

Before he could recall what he had been about to say, her head
popped up with a grin on her face. "Now, I've developed a plan
to disable all of the functions, I just need to know what kind of
filters I'll have access to."

Lex stared in shock, and his mouth fell open. Yes, Carl may have
outdone himself with this one. Enthusiastic was an insufficient
description of her. "Come again?"

She rolled her eyes, clearly annoyed. "Red? Green? Both?" she
clarified, speaking more slowly.

"I'm sorry, I--" he tried but was interrupted yet again.

"Red filters affect the furnace's... thermostat," she stated,
making hand gestures Lex didn't understand. "Green filters
affect the furnace's... motor."

He had to take a minute to consider what she could possibly mean
by these references. She was using the code and obviously had it
so well memorized that she sounded like an expert. Filters were
kryptonite, and he knew of the red and green varieties. He nodded
when at last it made sense. "Yes, I know--" was all he could
get out this time.

"I know a lot of things," she broke in.

"I'm sure you do." It was becoming increasingly difficult to
conceal his displeasure with her mannerisms.

"You ran some tests on furnaces when they first arrived," she
prattled on. "You managed to contain them in a cage made of
filters. And for some reason they didn't kill you when they had
the chance... multiple times, what a fake." She rolled her eyes
again, but Lex wasn't sure why.

He was fascinated by her ability to so easily insert the code.
Lex was also stunned by all the information about himself he'd
just heard and very much intrigued by this strange woman's
knowledge. "How do you know all of that?" he asked calmly.
Social situations were clearly not her forte, but he could tell
she was a wealth of information and ability.

"Like I said, I know things." She shrugged and averted her eyes
as if she'd realized she'd done something she shouldn't have.

"I see." Lex continued to look at her.

She quickly got over whatever she had been feeling or thinking
and turned back to him. "My current plan requires both. Can you
get them?"

The corners of Lex's mouth angled upward slightly. He was
impressed that she'd come up with this plan so fast and would do
whatever it took to get what she needed. "I'm certain that
won't be a--"

"Then I can't do it." She pushed back into her chair suddenly,
tossing her pencil down and drumming her fingers loudly again.

Lex closed his eyes to keep from rolling them. This infuriating
scientist would push him to his limits. "Flo," he said with as
much patience as he could muster. "If you'll stop interrupting
me and allow me to finish, I'm sure we'll be able to work this
out."

She blushed then and reached to tuck her hair behind her ear.
"Right, sorry," she apologized, "Lowell wasn't allowed to
accompany me. He usually keeps me in check."

"I'm sorry he wasn't able to join you." Lex would have to
make sure whoever *Lowell* was had a permanent spot beside her at
all future meetings. "But as I was saying, you shall have
whatever you need."

Her face lit up like a child's on Christmas morning. Lex
couldn't help but smile at her. "Ooh," she squealed,
"Excellent! If you have nothing else then, I'll go get
started." She reached to put her pad in her bag.

"Wait just a minute," he stopped her. "I need to tell you who
to contact to get set up. And are we agreed on the price?"

"Right, yes!" she blurted. "The price is fine. I'm just so
excited. I've been waiting for an opportunity like this one;
furnaces can't be trusted, and I'm glad someone who understands
that finally wants to do something about it." She pulled her pad
of paper back out.

"Yes, well if you knew half of what I know--" he began.

"I know *more* than half," she eyed him, making him feel
scrutinized. "I gather you have just a bit more information
about furnaces than I do." She raised her eyebrows and waited
expectantly.

"Ah. Well, we'll have to clear that up soon," he said with a
smile. "Your contact person is Carl, he will get you whatever
you require," he said with a wave of his hand.

"Fantastic. Can I go now?" she said without pausing.

"Yes, thank you, Flo. I look forward to hearing about your
progress on disabling furnaces." He smiled at her as she quickly
picked up her things and all but ran from the room. Lex finally
relaxed in the chair, feeling very satisfied with the result of
that meeting, and made a second note to ensure that *Lowell*
accompanied Flo next time.

***

October 26, 1995

Nearly a month of listening to Nat King Cole blaring through his
mind for several hours every day had gone by. It was starting to
grow on Scott. He was surprised that they weren't all about
love, as all the ones he'd ever heard were; some were about
friends, some about places. But often, they had a good beat and
were catchy. He was able to recognize most of them now, but
occasionally Jay would put on a new one.

Jay still didn't say much unless he was talking about Nat King
Cole... or Scott's sister. Scott regretted mentioning her that
first day, but, at the same time, he was glad they had at least
something they could talk about. The days in the lab were not so
boring when a conversation could be had now and then.

Scott approached Jay with the latest circuitry he'd completed.
He handed the piece to Jay for inspection. "I hope you don't
mind. My sister is going to stop by later," he mentioned as Jay
turned the circuit board over in his hands. "I have to drive her
to our aunt's house in Metrodale later, so I told her to meet me
here."

"In the basement of a church?" Jay side-eyed him as he tossed
the circuit board onto a pile of other circuit pieces before
going back to his own task, which Scott couldn't identify.
"What'd you tell her we were doing?" he asked.

"I didn't," Scott clarified. "She just knows I'm working for
you and thinks we're doing something for a parishioner."

Jay laughed. "Oh yeah, Lex Luthor goes to church here." He
continued to fiddle with the pieces. "Tell her we're building
a... superconducting flux inhibitor."

"Okay, that sounds... like a bunch of technical jargon." It
could really be the name of what they were working on, but it
certainly wouldn't mean anything to his sister. "So, what
exactly are we building?" he asked.

There were two separate, seemingly different devices that were
slowly taking shape in this basement laboratory of theirs. One of
them looked like a briefcase with a piece that was connected by a
set of thin cords. The piece at one end of the cord was a pair of
glasses with a small, contoured box at the end of one ear piece.
Tiny electrodes protruded from three places and would make
contact with the skin at the temples and between the eyes of
whoever donned them.

Scott shook his head and chuckled every time he saw the other
device they were working on. It looked like an outdated computer,
possibly from the 1980's, with a very large metal cabinet
covered in rows of blinking multicolored lights that housed a
satellite-dish-shaped *something*. The grey locker-looking box
even had a large toggle switch on the side, like it was meant for
a science fiction movie.

"I haven't come up with a name for it yet." Jay sat back from
his work station, rubbing his chin. "It's a device that
transmutes episodic anamneses by bringing them back to the
hippocampus for reconstruction. It then modifies the amygdala to
associate calculated perceptions to the chosen recollection." He
said this as if it should have been obvious, though it was
anything but.

Scott blinked. "Sorry, can you put that in layman's terms?"

"It changes memories." With that, Jay went back to fiddling
with the pieces in front of him.

Why he couldn't have said that in the first place, Scott didn't
know, but at least now he understood. "Ah. Whose memories are we
changing?"

"Nearly everyone eventually."

"Everyone?" Scott's eyebrows shot up.

"But for starters, Superman and Lois Lane," Jay said with an
excited wiggle of his eyebrows.

"Superman?" Scott wasn't surprised, really. It was common
knowledge that Luthor viewed Superman as his own personal enemy.
But Scott wasn't sure Luthor had thought this through. "How is
that even going to be possible?"

"They've assured me that what they're doing to him will make
him no more than human. I'm not in on that part of the gig. Some
Dr. Montgomery has that job."

"Montgomery," Scott huffed. "Sounds like a stuffy old British
guy..."

"I know." Jay laughed. "But Carl says there isn't anyone who
could do that job better than her."

Scott caught the use of the feminine pronoun. "Oh, my apologies,
a stuffy old British gal," he corrected. "So, what's she going
to do?"

"I have no idea." Jay shrugged. "But he's supposed to be
completely incapacitated."

"Can't wait to see that," Scott said in a tone that was both
excited and skeptical.

"Me either."

"So, one of these is for Superman and one for regular people?"
Scott asked, gesturing to the two devices in front of them.

Jay shook his head. "Levels of changes." Pointing at the large
one first, then the small one, he explained, "This thing here
will work on many people at the same time but can't change as
much. This one here only works on one person at a time, but the
changes we can make are limitless."

"Any idea what we are changing them to?" he asked.

"Not yet. But I'm thinking about having some fun with it and
adding some Nat King Cole to the mix."

"You would." Scott shook his head. That didn't surprise him at
all.

A knock at the door put an end to their discussion. "That'll be
my sister," Scott said as he went to pick up his things.

"Bring her in," Jay insisted, motioning toward the door. "I'd
like to meet this Nat King Cole fan you're related to."

Scott went to the door and unlocked it with his copy of the key,
motioning for his sister to come in. Though close in age to Jay,
he assumed, she definitely didn't behave like he did. Scott was
sure it should be obvious why he felt so protective of her. She
stood small in frame, obviously shy, but had blue eyes that
sparkled.

Their aunt was taking her to some formal event Scott hadn't
really paid attention to but recalled as he took in the fancy
dress she had donned for the event. It was a knee-length flowy
thing of dark blue with a neckline that seemed to be designed to
frame the treble clef necklace dangling from a delicate sterling
silver chain. Her brown hair was swept up, completing the look,
which brought something to Jay's eyes that Scott both recognized
and didn't like.

"Samantha," he began the introduction, "this is..." Except he
wasn't sure what Jay wanted to divulge.

"Justice," the doctor supplied. A pseudonym, of course.
*Justice* stood from his table and took the few short steps to
meet them. Reaching out his hand he added, "It's nice to meet
you, Samantha." Scott rolled his eyes. For a moment, Scott
wondered if this kid was going to turn debonair on him and kiss
his sister's hand.

"Nice to meet you, too, Justice," Samantha greeted, shaking
Jay's hand and meeting his gaze head on. "You can call me
Sam." Scott lifted his eyebrows at the strange look in her eyes
and the unexpected confidence in her voice.

***

November 2, 1995

Lex entered the large conference room with a folder under his
arm, determination in his mind, and satisfaction on his face.
Having been released from prison on parole just days ago, he
found that his newly gained freedom unchained his excitement and
aroused in him new levels of tenacity. His release had been a
feat in itself that Carl had pulled off famously with a few very
well-placed bribes and threats. It was only a matter of time
before he would begin taking what was rightfully his and putting
to rest anything that stood in his way.

The purpose of this meeting was to assess the current state of
his scheme. He glanced around the room as he made his way to the
head of the large table, the only furniture in the room except
for a very thin and long high table that graced one side of the
room and sat below a huge window overlooking the east end of
Metropolis.

Lex quickly observed the meeting's attendants. While the table
could seat twenty, only four chairs near the head of the table
were occupied. Immediately to the left of the head of the table,
Jay Hightower sat tapping a pencil on what appeared to be a
dilapidated spiral notebook. Lex did not recognize the man seated
beside him and assumed it must be his assistant, Scott Ferguson,
who sat with his hands in his lap and a look of awe on his face
that Lex appreciated. Opposite Ferguson sat Florence Montgomery
with a laptop open in front of her, energetically clicking away
at the keys. A person he assumed must be the Lowell whom she
couldn't function without was seated beside her. Lowell, a very
average looking man with dark hair and dark eyes, sat motionless
with a blank stare directed out of the window opposite him.

Carl followed Lex into the room carrying a large, plastic file
storage box and closed the door behind him before filling the
empty seat to the right of the head of the table and setting the
file box on the floor next to Lex's chair. Lex looked around the
table, nodding at his guests as he seated himself and opened his
folder. He quickly perused the notes he had made previously
before looking up and smiling.

"First," Lex began, getting down to business, "I'd like to
apprise you of the new title. For communication purposes,
henceforth this project will be known as Project Calibration."
He looked up and around the room and received nods from everyone.
Lex continued, "Dr. Hightower, enlighten me as to the status of
your task." He steepled his fingers in front of him and waited.

"Both devices are finished," Jay answered, "and we began
testing yesterday."

"Excellent," Lex complimented with a lift of his brows. "And
you believe you've worked all the kinks out? No side effects?"
This was an important part of this entire scheme. He couldn't
have anyone aware of what had taken place. The transition must be
seamless and his infiltration ironclad.

"None yet, sir." Hightower's unwavering eye contact filled Lex
with confidence. "But we'll need a few more weeks of
testing."

He allowed a smile and a nod before pausing briefly to collect
his thoughts and organize his papers. "Flo," he began, using
the name she insisted on at their last meeting. She looked up to
meet his face but did not stop her rough typing. "Tell me how
your assignment progresses."

"Nearly done, sir." She finally stopped typing, giving a
welcomed reprieve from her incessant clicking. "My research was
correct. Mixing the green and red filters has exactly the right
effect." Lex was confused for the briefest of moments before
recalling the code they'd used before. "And it doesn't take
much to work. Large amounts of green filters are lethal and
painful, but small amounts weaken enough. Red filters alleviate
any other side effects. We'll need more green filters for the
take down and initial procedure."

"You shall have it," Lex promised with a nod. Thoughts of 'the
take down', as she put it, made him giddy with anticipation.

Her eyes lit up and a smile stretched across her face.
"Fantastic!" She beamed, exuding confidence. Then she started
loudly drumming her fingers on the table, and her face changed to
a frown. "There is one necessary item still on order and once
that comes in we'll be ready."

"What piece would that be?" he questioned, jotting down a few
notes.

"The pen," she stated. She went back to clicking at the keys.
Lex made a concerted effort to stem his rising irritation as
Lowell very discreetly reached over and gently nudged her elbow.
She very obviously stifled a sigh before adding, "It should be
in day after tomorrow."

Lex lifted an eyebrow. This woman was absolutely terrible at
picking up on social cues. So caught up in whatever she was doing
and thinking, she paid no attention to those around her to even
notice them. Lowell, who continued in his motionless staring into
the distance, did seem to serve a purpose. Lex inwardly laughed
at the ridiculousness of it all as he looked back at his notes.

"Excuse me," Ferguson said as he leaned forward with his hand
up slightly.

"Yes?"

"Have you considered the need to change records?" Ferguson
leaned back in his chair with a skeptical look on his face.
"People will eventually put things together if there is evidence
to suggest something they remember isn't true." Ferguson must
have seen the look in Lex's eyes for he shrank in on himself.
"Of course. You've already considered that."

A nod was all Lex needed to give. He had built his life on power
and influence. He lost his power once before, and it wouldn't
happen again. He certainly didn't get to where he was today by
making missteps in anything. Of course, he knew what still needed
to be done. A few months in prison gives a person plenty of time
to mull over the details, considering every flaw and finding
solutions. That meeting had been scheduled for later this
afternoon, the first available meeting time for Anna Seville, an
enigma in the technology world.

He turned to Flo and Lowell. "Flo, thank you for coming, you may
go now," he said quickly and specifically.

She smiled, closed her laptop, and left in a rush of petite
nervousness.

"Mr. Ferguson," he began, turning to face the man, "I owe you
thanks. That discovery you shared with me provides the perfect
opportunity to begin Project Calibration, and I thank you for
that. It is a beautifully elaborate and believable cover story."
It was the truth. Lex had considered other scenarios, but none of
them had that bit of reality, that zing that would clench his
win.

Ferguson's mouth opened slightly but no words came out, he only
nodded. Lex smiled at the effect he had on the man. Even though
Ferguson had worked for Lex for more than two years, they'd
never met until now. But it was clear that Ferguson was a
valuable employee, and Lex would consider him for other tasks as
the need arose.

"You have been reassigned at S.T.A.R. Labs. The switch was
effortless, given your role in the research. You'll begin
working with a Dr. Bernard Klein on the discovery of Superman's
home world. You will also assist Superman in preparing for his
*trip*."

Ferguson's eyebrows lifted. "Will I still be working with Jay
part time?"

"Yes, but your duties at S.T.A.R. Labs come first." Lex tapped
a stack of papers on the table top to straighten them.

"Certainly, sir," Scot acknowledged, smiling, "I knew you'd
be pleased."

"And Hightower, this box," Lex motioned to the large, plastic
file box that Carl had brought in, "contains the information for
the memory changes as well as some further instructions for
you."

Hightower simply nodded as he took hold of the box and made his
way out of the conference room with Ferguson.

Lex stood up to leave and took a deep breath, filling his lungs
with a sense of accomplishment. The clock was ticking. It was
only a matter of time before he would have the life that he was
meant to have.

***

Chapter 7

November 6, 1995

"And no one has noticed?" Scott asked as he sat at a computer
in the laboratory hidden under the church. He scrolled through
the data files, looking for anything that indicated a problem.
Since the meeting they had with Luthor a few days ago, they'd
continued running tests as he had requested. Jay was handling all
of that and leaving mountains of data for Scott to sift through.

"Not yet." Across the room, Jay worked at another computer.
"Um... I think we need to modify circuit 26A. This doesn't look
right." Scott heard Jay moving around behind him and then set a
box of circuit pieces next to him. Jay leaned over a piece of
paper nearby and scribbled for a moment before handing over a
crudely drawn schematic.

"How many more tests?" Scott took the paper and box and began
piecing it together.

"Just a few," Jay answered, sitting back down at the computer
he'd been working on. "There are two scenarios I haven't
tested yet. One, replacing particularly traumatic memories, and
two, replacing very long strands of memories. I've got a kid
I'm rewriting the story of now. Going back a couple of years,
replacing the memories and putting him in a new place."

"Someone's going to notice that," Scott pointed out. His
conscience didn't like this part of his job. Not that everything
he'd done the past few years of his life was much better, but
this was an innocent kid. There had to be a line somewhere.

"No, he's a homeless runaway, been on the streets for years
now."

Scott breathed a small sigh of relief. "So, you're helping
him." He smirked. "I didn't know you had it in you."

Jay rolled his eyes. "Keep that in mind when I ask this next
thing." Jay made his way to stand behind Scott, watching him
work for a moment before asking, "Mind if I ask your sister
out?"

"Uh..." Scott would be lying if he said he didn't see that
coming. The looks they'd exchanged two weeks ago and the
difference he saw in his sister since then was obvious enough.
Did he want his sister dating someone like Jay? Jay was smart at
least and doing well for himself. Even with a sketchy background,
he'd be able to support her. But he was getting ahead of
himself, Jay just wanted to ask his sister out. Did he mind?
"No?"

"Good," Jay said as he clapped his hand on Scott's shoulder,
"because I've already met up with her twice, and I got wind of
this great little piano bar that is doing a Nat King Cole tribute
tonight and I thought, since she's a fan too, that she might
like to go with me."

Scott's mouth opened in shock. They'd already seen each other?
Why ask, then? He shook his head. His sister was not a child by
any stretch of the imagination, but she'd always be his *little*
sister. Still, Jay seemed to be genuinely excited about this.
"She'd... probably like that." That much was true. "What time
will you have her home?"

Jay laughed. "Does she have a curfew?"

"Er... no," Scott said, realizing what that had sounded like.
"We just have... a thing in the morning..."

"It's okay, *Mr. Ferguson*, I'll bring her back before
midnight." Jay stood up straight with his hands clasped behind
his back, nodding, as if he were a silly high school kid.

"See that you do." Scott glared, but the goofy look on Jay's
face cracked his resolve, and he laughed. He tossed the completed
circuit to Jay. "Here's your circuit."

***

November 10, 1995

Scott accompanied Dr. Klein out of the elevator and onto the
newsroom floor. Someone young and boisterous greeted Dr. Klein
with a handshake, and they engaged in small talk that Scott
didn't pay any attention to. Instead, he made himself busy
scanning the newsroom. He found one of his targets at a desk on
the other side of the room.

Lois Lane was seated at the desk, shuffling some papers. She took
a sip of something that must have been offensive and then poured
whatever it was into a very dead plant perched on the corner of
what he could only assume was her desk. His eyes roamed the room
again and spotted Clark Kent, leaning back in his chair at a desk
facing hers, his speculative eyes locked onto her as he stroked
his chin.

Scott checked to make sure that Dr. Klein was still involved in
his conversation with the kid. It sounded like they were
discussing the intricacies of the internet, and Scott was glad to
have the opportunity to merely observe Lane and Kent before he
would be present for the impending conversation. His job at this
appointment was to sell the story that Dr. Klein so easily
believed to Lane and Kent.

When he turned back to the newsroom below, he saw Kent
determinedly walking toward Lane, but as he approached, he seemed
to lose his confidence. He leaned closer to her and said
something that caused her to smile. She stood up and gathered her
things as she responded to whatever he said. He made some sort of
gesture that made Lane -- and Scott -- stop completely.

Was that a *flying* gesture?

Scott suppressed an amused laugh. Did he make these kinds of
gestures regularly? If he did, Scott was sure it would be easy
for anyone paying attention to figure out the man's secret. They
even shared the same face and hair, among other things.

The kid, whom Dr. Klein had introduced as Jimmy, led them around
the edge of the newsroom toward the conference room. Once inside,
Dr. Klein set his papers down on the table and began pacing.
Scott went to the window and looked out at the goings on in the
newsroom.

Scott rolled his eyes as he caught sight of Lane and Kent in what
could only be described as a tender embrace. Clark Kent seemed
like a... goober. How on Earth did he catch someone like Lois
Lane? Of course, he *was* Superman. This was ridiculous... and
Scott was a little jealous.

He saw Jimmy approach them and clear his throat. Thank goodness
he interrupted when he did. They had almost had a chance to kiss,
and from the way they're eyes locked, Scott was sure they were
about to. Kent rolled his eyes. Then, after Jimmy said something
and pointed the folder he held in his hand in Scott's direction,
he looked directly at him. Jimmy walked off, no doubt to do
something for someone and, to Scott's relief, they finally
released their embrace. Kent took her hand and whispered
something in her ear before leading Lane to the conference room.

"What can we do for you, Dr. Klein," Kent asked as they entered
and closed the door behind them. Lane took a seat at the large
table, and Kent propped himself on the smaller shelf against the
wall, leaving Dr. Klein to pace between them. Scott stood near
the window he'd been looking through, and they seemed oblivious
to his presence.

"Forgive me for interrupting," he began. Dr. Klein stopped his
pacing to introduce him simply stating, "This is Scott. Lois.
Clark." Scott was caught off guard by this and merely held up
his hand to wave. "I was hoping you'd be able to help me
contact Superman," Dr. Klein said with raised eyebrows.

"I can try," Clark said, confirming Scott's impression that
the doctor did *not* know of the superhero's secret identity.
Scott had wondered if Dr. Klein knew, but he'd merely told him
that contacting these two reporters always got him in touch with
Superman, so Scott played along. It was Scott's knowledge of
that secret identity that brought him on this visit. His function
was to ensure that things went according to the plan.

"What's up?" Lois asked.

"We think we found Krypton." Bernard Klein was not known for
being subtle. Scott had learned this in a matter of days.
Sometimes this was to everyone's advantage, and sometimes it
threw everyone for a loop. This time, it was the second.

"Krypton?" Lois nearly choked out. She stood up from her seat
and moved to Clark's side, threading her arm under his and
around his back. He put his arm about her waist but kept his eyes
on Dr. Klein, who had gone back to pacing back and forth in the
small space.

"Mind you," he began, "it's no guarantee that it *is*
Krypton, but the nature of the object is such that it fits with
the description Superman gave us of what happened that made...
him leave..." He stopped abruptly and turned quickly to face
them, blurting out, "It has kryptonite in its composition." His
hand flew to his mouth, and he began chewing his fingernails and
went back to pacing.

Lois and Clark exchanged a look before she asked, "When?"

"Just a few weeks ago," Dr. Klein replied without any change in
his pacing.

"What else can you tell us?" Lois asked, though her eyes were
focused on Clark.

"Why are you telling us?" Clark asked.

Dr. Klein began speaking, accentuating his words with his free
hand while still pacing. "Well, at first they weren't planning
on telling Superman... or anyone for that matter. I told them
they should at least tell him, but they said not until they were
sure. They wanted more time, they said. I didn't think that was
reasonable. I mean, if I'd lost my home and there was a
possibility of finding it..." he trailed off, his pacing slowing
down a bit. He stopped again, this time with a sorrowful look in
his eyes.

"Is there more?" Clark asked quickly. Lois appeared to be
holding her breath while listening to this exchange.

"Yes," Dr. Klein answered with a hopeful tone. "They are still
collecting data and assimilating their information. The presence
of kryptonite really got everyone excited. You should have seen
it." He smiled then and went back to pacing again.

"I'm sure it was great," Clark finally said. He looked at Lois
who lifted her eyebrows and shrugged. All this silent
communication was cloying, and Scott looked away.

Scott silently chuckled at the doctor's anxiety as he watched
the man wear a path in the floor. It was time to take matters
into his own hands. "We think there may be life," Scott spoke
up. Everyone turned to look at him. Scott waved a hand in Dr.
Klein's direction before continuing, "I'm sorry, I didn't
think he'd get to the point any time soon."

"*Life*?" Clark repeated, mouth dropping open. He let go of
Lois and stepped closer to Dr. Klein.

"Yes!" Dr. Klein stated with a lift of his eyebrows. "Life!
It's about 38.6 percent possible. Not fully understanding how
Kryptonian physiology reacts to the red sun and how kryptonite
affects them under those conditions, we couldn't be completely
sure." Dr. Klein went straight to the table and sat, propping
his elbows on the large table and placing his fingernails between
his teeth. For a brilliant scientist, Dr. Klein certainly was
juvenile in expressing his emotions. "It's not my department,
mind you, it's Scott's. But they asked me to head the team
because I've worked with Superman before."

"So, it *is* possible..." The shock on Clark's face spelled
disbelief. But the inclusion of Dr. Klein in this plot was surely
helping, that and the validity of the information. Dr. Klein had
seen the data himself. Luthor was right -- this was a very
believable cover story.

"Scott, do you mind?" Dr. Klein looked up at him with pleading
in his eyes. They'd discussed this before entering the Daily
Planet. Scott was prepared with the details to explain what had
happened.

"Not at all," Scott began. "Based on the information we have
so far, it seemed that when Krypton exploded, only about half of
the planet must have been demolished. It appears that the smaller
chunks were blasted quickly away, mostly in the direction of the
red sun based on the movement of the remaining mass. It's all
conservation of momentum." Scott paused and could see in their
faces that only Dr. Klein had any interest in hearing more about
that.

He trudged on, "That remaining mass, a substantial piece of the
planet, is now moving in a much more elliptical path around the
same sun. It is still in that habitable zone but changing its
distance from the sun drastically over the period of its year.
Now that we've discovered water there as well, we've been able
to confirm that it could support life. As long as the explosion
that propelled it off its course wasn't too jarring to kill
everyone on that part of the planet..." He let his words trail
off.

Dr. Klein looked at him with a fascinated grin from his seat at
the table, his hands fidgeting on top of his folders. Lois
continued to lean on the shelf at the side of the room,
contemplating this new information. And Clark stood motionless in
the middle of the room, an unreadable expression on his face.

Had they bought it?

Clark was the first person to put words together. "What's
next?" he asked simply.

"Superman has to go," Lois broke in. She stood up and walked to
Clark.

While this was exactly the outcome Scott was hoping for, he was
surprised it came from Lois, as was everyone else, judging by the
confused looks they aimed at her.

"It would be a very risky thing," Dr. Klein pointed out, "for
him to traipse halfway across the galaxy on a 38.6 percent
likelihood of finding someone he may not even be related to. The
flight alone will require more from him than he's ever had to
give before. We're talking a trip *light-years* away. We don't
even know how fast he can travel, but it *won't* be a quick
trip. And who knows what he'll find there. Could be nothing."

Scott fought the urge to roll his eyes. Dr. Klein's tendency to
run on and list out all the potential problems was not helping
matters. Convenient when working on a million-dollar project with
only one shot, but now it could potentially derail this part of
the plan from working. But Scott was unsure of its effect because
whatever Lois and Clark were discussing, they were doing it
silently with their eyes.

"He'd likely need some amount of support," Dr. Klein
continued. "Remember what happened with Nightfall? Our
communication devices would certainly have limits... What if once
he's far enough from our yellow sun he ends up... hungry??"

"Dr. Klein," Clark interrupted, "I'm sure he'll have plenty
of time to think about these things."

"Actually, due to our current position within the solar system,
Superman will have to make this choice within the next eleven
days, or we'll lose the ability to use the ..." The look Clark
was aiming at Dr. Klein stopped him. "Right. Eleven days."

"Why don't we give you guys some time to talk about it," Scott
said. "With Superman of course. And you can get back to us as
soon as possible?"

"Yes, that would be great," Lois and Clark said at the same
time.

***

Chapter 8

November 13, 1995

"Thank you for taking the time to meet with me, Miss Seville,"
Lex began. They were seated at the same overly large conference
table from last week's meeting. He relished the feel of having
such an enormous room to help intimidate others. But Miss Anna
Seville didn't seem to be intimidated, and he appreciated that
about her. "I hear you have the skills I need."

Lex thought there had been some mistake when she walked into the
conference room with a wide smile and bobbing curls framing her
face. He assumed she must be in the wrong place. Though tall, her
thin stature and childlike features and mannerisms gave the
impression that she was much younger. In fact, she looked like a
high school cheerleader. Even her name seemed juvenile.

"You're welcome." She sent him a jovial smile as if she were
in an entirely different kind of meeting than Lex. "I was told
you need someone who can rewrite records."

"Yes," he confirmed, "and those records are numerous and
protected through any number of security measures put in
place."

She giggled then, catching him off guard. "Security measures
make me laugh!" She waved her hand as if security measures were
something everyone jokes about.

"That's... good to hear," Lex stuttered, quickly recovering.
"Carl will provide you with a list of what will need to be
changed and where those records can be found. How much time will
you need?" he asked with his eyebrows raised.

"Oh," she pondered, tapping her chin, "probably just a few
hours."

"Really?" Lex said, raising his eyebrows in surprise. "That
fast?"

"Mr. Luthor," she began, dipping her chin and speaking as if
she were comforting a child, "It won't take long to write code
to rewrite the records. And, let's be honest. I've already got
code to get through almost all of the security systems out
there." She began examining her long, polished fingernails.

"But the list of changes is *quite* extensive."

It was her turn to raise her eyebrows and ask a question, now
running the meeting. "What format will you be giving me this
list of changes?"

"Carl?" he called.

Carl, who had been perched on the table along the wall, stepped
forward and picked up a large file box holding numerous hanging
files each crammed with more than a few folders and set it on the
table in front of Miss Seville.

"Printed?" She scrunched her face and looked at the box like it
was filled with something putrid. "Is there a digital copy of
all this?"

Lex turned to Carl who gave a quick nod. "I presume so."

Miss Seville smiled her overly nice smile again and clapped her
hands together before placing them in her lap. "You'll have to
give me copies of all the digital files. All of this can be done
with code, much of which is already written. It's just a matter
of organizing the code to do the right set of things," she
explained like it was nothing.

It was all well and good, but he needed to make sure that she
would be able to take care of everything. "How will you handle
systems that are internal?"

"You mean offline?" She smirked. "I just need a connection."

"And how will you manage that?" Lex asked for clarification.

"Please," she said, waving his concerns away. "Have some faith
in me, Mr. Luthor"

"Of course." And he did. There would be vast amounts of changes
to make, but this strange character sitting before him struck him
as the kind of person who would take care of it. That was really
the purpose of this meeting, to assess her character and
abilities. "I will contact you when the procedure needs to take
place."

"I look forward to it." She winked at him as she stood up from
the table, looked at the file box with blatant disgust, and
sauntered from the room.

Lex laughed. This was the last piece of the puzzle. After months
of plotting and planning, organizing and delegating, Lex was
nearing the end of this miserable life that didn't truly belong
to him. It belonged to someone else, a man who had been caught,
demoralized, treated like a criminal. Not Lex. Lex was powerful
and intelligent and would not suffer the consequences of other's
actions any longer.

Soon he would truly have all he ever wanted.

Lois Lane.

***

November 15, 1995

"Wow." Scott stared at the computer screen, blinking. "That's
fast."

Superman stood behind him, looking over Scott's shoulder at the
screen. They were testing his speed in space to see just how fast
Superman could travel. Since he had to remain at slower speeds
within the atmosphere, he flew to the moon. Scott just couldn't
believe how quickly he'd come back.

"I bet I can go even faster," Superman said with a playful
tone. This part was fun for him, he had told Scott the other day.
He'd never done anything like this before -- testing his limits.
"How long will that make this trip?" he asked.

Scott punched several buttons on his computer keyboard before
announcing, "Two and a half years there, two and a half years
back, plus however much time you spend there..." Scott trailed
off

"More than five years?" Superman didn't sound pleased.

"Plus or minus," Scott added, shrugging his shoulders.

"Well, I guess it could be worse." The way Superman was always
so positive was both good and bad. Scott appreciated that he was
such a good guy, but at the same time, it made his job just a
little harder. Knowing that this trip wasn't actually taking
place, he felt kind of bad for giving Superman the idea that
Krypton might be out there...

Scott shook his head and changed the topic. "When was the last
time you held your breath?" he asked. Right now, the goal was to
figure out how much oxygen Superman would need to take with him.
They'd just established how much time he would travel. This was
the only other piece of information they needed.

"Yesterday, actually," Superman turned and walked across the
room to the table covered in equipment they were working on.
"When I met with Lois and Clark, we tried it."

"How'd that go?" Scott quirked a brow. It was so humorous to
watch Superman pretend he was two people, always talking about
his other self as if it were another person. Scott tried to
imagine how Lois found out, and although he really wanted to
know, he couldn't ask and risk blowing his cover.

"We stopped after about thirty minutes," Superman admitted
before quickly adding, "But not because I felt like I needed a
breath. Later that evening I spent several hours taking a breath
every thirty minutes. It was fine."

"No, I meant the conversation." Scott chuckled.

"Well, Clark..." Superman shuffled a bit while sifting through
the various items on the table in front of him. "He's a little
worried that it's not worth it. I mean, if they were able to
send me here, wouldn't they be able to come here, too?"

The humanity in Superman's response surprised Scott. "Why are
you doing this if you're so doubtful?"

Superman shrugged. "Well, Lois can be... pretty convincing."

"Clark's got it coming if he thinks he'll wear the pants in
that relationship," Scott remarked flippantly.

Superman chuckled, and it surprised Scott. He hadn't ever really
thought about it, but he supposed there might be more to
Superman. "He knows that," Superman assured him. "But she's
got a point. She thinks I should see if any of my relatives might
be out there. It would be nice to not think you're the only one
left of your... people."

Scott never really considered what this trip might mean for
Superman and surprised himself in realizing that assuming
Superman would feel nothing about it was unreasonable. Scott
hadn't been aware of just how *human* Superman was. He shook
these thoughts from his head. Becoming sympathetic to Superman
would not serve him well.

"Just don't find out you have a sister." His attempt to change
the conversation was met with a lift of a questioning eyebrow.

"Oh?" Superman wondered aloud. "Sounds like you speak from
experience."

Scott shook his head. "They are cute sometimes, and a pain in
the butt the rest of the time," he explained, though he didn't
know why. "Yeah, this one's a bit younger than me and dating...
one of my bosses. I just don't like it."

Superman nodded slowly as if he could possibly understand what it
was like to have a sister dating someone he didn't like. "What
can you do?"

That was precisely what Scott had been wondering. He rolled his
eyes. "I know right? Let's get back to this here," Scott
redirected, pointing to the computer screen in front of him.
"So, thirty minutes?"

"Yeah," verified Superman.

Scott pulled a pencil from behind his ear and jotted a few things
down on the pad of paper next to him.

"Okay," he started, running the numbers through his head while
simultaneously writing them down. "So, two breaths an
hour...87600 breaths over your trip... plus or minus. Average
breath size... Oh, that was yesterday." Scott shuffled through
some papers before finding the figure he needed. "What was R?
... by 31.998... This is for liquid oxygen..." He paused and
looked something up in a large book on the shelf above the
computer screen, did one more calculation, and smiled at
Superman. "Looks like you need about three liters."

"Plus or minus?" Superman teased.

He had a sense of humor, too. How many people know about this
Superman? "Yeah." He laughed. "That won't be too difficult to
manage."

"Not at all."

Superman stepped away then and went to another table to view the
equipment that was being prepared. Scott followed and, upon
seeing Superman's knit brows, reached for a stack of diagrams.

"Here's what we're building for you." He laid the diagrams
flat on the table and began pointing as he explained. "We've
got space here for your air supply plus this snazzy piece of
genius that you can use to refill it should you be in a place
where you can." Scott picked up the device and held it out to
Superman. When Superman didn't take it, he set it back down on
the table and continued. "This will hold your food... if you can
call it that... sustenance is all it really is, compact though,
so you can take plenty of it for once you're too far from our
sun. Here's a place for anything you might want to take... and
this will house your communication system. Eventually it won't
work, but it will be nice to have on your way out, and you can
give us a heads up on your way back."

Superman had a brooding look on his face as he gave a quick not
and turned away. "Sounds like everything's been taken care of
then," he said before disappearing as quickly as he had
arrived.

For a moment, Scott considered whether this was too much. Had he
crossed that line he'd set for himself? But he had his family to
think of, and they weren't *killing* the hero, just relocating
him. Scott swallowed his remorse and focused instead on what was
left to be done.

***

Chapter 9

November 20, 1995

Lex stood at the window of the second-floor conference room of
Son Kwan Industries, looking out at the edge of the harbor. From
his present position, he would have a front-row view of today's
proceedings that were set to begin any moment on the dock
directly below him. The sunlight peeked through the clouds,
casting strange shadows and sparkling back up to meet Lex. In his
current mood, he didn't feel at all embarrassed about being
pleased with something that *sparkled*.

He stepped away from the view and walked to a couch that had been
placed facing the window for the occasion and took a seat. He
took a deep breath and picked up a small device that looked like
a miniature television remote from the table next to the couch.
He turned the remote over in his hands, careful not to press any
buttons, and admired its humble simplicity.

Today, Superman would leave, the fulfillment of his project
nearing its end. S.T.A.R. Labs had put together a set of
equipment for Superman to use on his long journey through space,
and the schmuck had been working with a group of scientists to
learn how to use it. Now all that was left was Superman's
departure. He would, however, *not* fly away and travel to a
chunk of a planet believed to be all that remained of his home
world, Krypton, to see if there was any evidence of a living
society there.

Naturally, it had been advertised on the front page of the Daily
Planet. Countless admirers had crowded into the harbor to catch
one last glimpse of their superhero before he disappeared for
what could potentially be years. They had arrived early, with
their chairs, tents, and makeshift kitchens, to claim their spots
like they were tailgating at a football game.

*Superman will leave today*, Lex thought. *My enemy will be no
more*. But not in the way the rest of the world expected. And
then there would be no one to stop Lex from getting everything he
wanted. Everything he rightfully deserved.

A door opened at the edge of the platform. Cheering and applause
commenced. From his vantage point, Lex could see into the room
Superman had been in and quickly reached for binoculars to get a
clearer view. He stood and rushed to the window, set the remote
down on the window ledge, and crouched down to better see under
the overhang at the edge of the building.

Lois Lane, *his* Lois, was standing several feet inside the room.
Though he couldn't see the tears, the redness of her face
suggested she was crying. *Oh, Lois*, Lex thought, his heart
reaching out to her. *It will all be over soon, my darling*. The
emotions that coursed through him were not unlike those of a
parent disciplining a child in a way that causes the parent
sorrow but is undoubtedly necessary in teaching a lesson.

Superman turned to her and she nodded, wrapping her arms around
herself. The door closed her away from him, forcing his attention
to Superman who walked toward the center of the makeshift stage.
They had chosen this location because it had plenty of room for
an audience, or so they'd told Superman. In reality, it was next
to an essential geographic feature that would provide a
convenient way to hide what would happen shortly after Superman
left -- a large body of water.

Superman donned his equipment, all carefully and expertly
arranged in a practical and efficient pack. He turned to wave to
the crowd but did not say anything, just kept waving as the
applause grew. Then he turned to face the harbor and pushed off.
Forced to keep a lower speed near the ground, he went up and then
did a barrel roll aiming himself toward the sea. A small cloud
dissipated as he flew through it leaving a swirling trail of
condensation.

Lex picked up the remote once again as he watched Superman weave
around other clouds and shrink in size. Once Lex could no longer
see the superhero, he pushed a button on the device he held in
his hand.

Finally. *Finally*, it was all beginning.

He had waited patiently for months now.

He could feel a rising surge of satisfaction in his veins.

The door opened, and Carl stuck his head in. "The helicopter is
ready, sir."

"On my way." Lex set down the binoculars and left the room,
shutting the door behind him.

***

The large fishing boat bobbed with the passing waves as the
helicopter landed gently on its deck. Lex stepped from the open
door, ducking as the wind from the powerful blades pushed him
downward despite their slowing rotation. As he stepped away from
the helicopter, he glanced around looking for any indication that
his prize had been collected.

"Where is he?" Lex bellowed to the approaching captain.

"The Hot Tuna is almost back now." The captain gestured toward
the stern of the ship, and the two made their way toward a group
of sailors preparing for the arrival of the smaller boat. When
his large boat had been chosen for the job due to its size, the
captain had received instructions to be at a specific location in
the water at a set time, expecting the drop of a very special
parcel. Several smaller, faster boats covered zones in the area
to quickly retrieve the package that could land in any one of
them.

Satisfaction had encircled Lex since the moment he'd pressed the
button, exposing Superman to kryptonite and expelling an inflated
flotation device. As the Hot Tuna drew near, he could see a
tangle of red fabric and yellow plastic, and the satisfaction
changed to euphoria. The success of his plan was finally set in
stone at the successful capture of the only thing that could ever
stand in his way.

They hoisted their invaluable cargo to the deck of the ship and
dropped it in an awkward heap with what was an enjoyable thud to
Lex's ears. He crouched near the head of Superman, sweeping the
wet fabric from his face.

"And so we meet again," Lex sneered. "Though under much more
palatable circumstances." A wry smile tugged at the edge of his
mouth. "For me anyway."

Lex rose from Superman's side, standing taller than he had in a
long time. He turned abruptly away, heading for the helicopter
once more, barking orders over his shoulder, directing his world
once more.

As fate had always intended.

***

"No, sir," Travis Knapp said as he walked beside Lex down the
long, sterile hallway. "She came willingly to the holding
room." The tapping of their shoes was the only other sound to be
heard above the buzzing of the fluorescent lighting. Doors were
occasionally spaced on either side with labels indicating their
purpose. Lex paid them no mind, focusing only on his destination
and the task that awaited him there.

"Excellent," Lex said, relieved. "I didn't want this to be
any more painful for her than it already will be."

"That's very considerate of you, sir," Travis acknowledged.
They came to a door labeled 'Green Room' in which speakers
traditionally relaxed before heading to the lecture hall next
door to give their lectures. Travis stepped to the side of the
doorway and faced Lex.

"Of course, it is," Lex confirmed. He looked Travis in the eye.
"I want only what is best for her."

"Yes, sir." Travis nodded his head and opened the door to allow
Lex in.

The room was small and a bit less sterile than the rest of the
building. Two puffy club chairs sat against one wall, opposite a
matching couch with a coffee table between them. A window
opposite the doorway allowed light to spill into the room. In the
shaft of light, Lois stretched out in one of the club chairs with
her eyes closed and legs crossed, her head leaning back against
the wall and her arms draped peacefully on the armrests.

Lex was grateful that Ferguson was able to gain the trust of Lois
and Kent and was proving to be an invaluable asset. Ferguson was
just inside the door, leaning on a table with his ankles crossed
in front of him, holding a jacket casually slung over his linked
hands. After the departure of Superman, it was Ferguson who had
brought her here. He stood when he realized Lex was approaching,
then nodded and stepped out of the room.

She didn't move as Lex approached, as if she were drained of
energy. Lex felt an ache in his chest seeing her this way,
sullen, with tears staining her cheeks. He crouched down in front
of her and noticed the ring on her left hand. Simple, pathetic.
Clark must have made her some sort of promise before leaving. He
would replace it soon enough with far finer, infinitely more
appropriate jewelry for the remarkable woman that Lois was.

He reached out to take her hand in his and was surprised that she
allowed it. Her head came up as her eyes opened slowly as if
she'd been asleep. Her eyes went wide with recognition seconds
later, and she yanked her hand from his.

"Lex?!?" she said, sitting up straight in the chair and looking
around the room. "Where's Scott? Wh--what are you doing here?
How is this possible?"

"Lois, forgive me," Lex apologized. "I didn't mean to startle
you. Scott stepped out for a moment." He shifted his weight and
moved to sit on the armrest her hand had vacated.

A frown creased her brow, and the draw to smooth it with his
fingers was palpable, but he resisted. She was nervous. Of
course, she didn't realize he was no longer in prison, and it
was enough of a shock already. He would be patient with her as
only he could be.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. "I... thought you were
in jail." She directed her frown at him, and he was so pleased
she was looking at him that he didn't care that her expression
held nothing but contempt.

"I was," he acknowledged, nodding, "but I was released on
parole--"

"That's impossible," she interrupted, standing up and walking
toward the door.

Lex chose not to respond. The last thing he wanted was to argue
with Lois about piddly matters. Instead, he briefly closed his
eyes and envisioned his goal, calming himself.

She reached the door and jiggled the handle. "Why is the door
locked?" she asked as she slapped her hand on it.

Lex stood but ignored her question. "Lois," he said soothingly,
"it pains me to see you suffering so... with no one to comfort
you. I've come to offer my support." He held his hands at his
side, palms up, offering whatever she needed as he took a few
steps closer to her.

She turned to look at him, the same scowl still on her face.
"Support?" She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

Even her temper was endearing to Lex, and he couldn't help but
smile at her. "Yes," he assured her. "I know you are alone
now, and I hope to fill that void." He took a step closer to
her, leaving only a few feet between them.

"You're insane." She rolled her eyes as she shook her head and
turned back to the door, pounding on it again.

"That is hardly true. Everyone has left you. You need
companionship."

She stilled. After a moment, he heard her release a sob as her
shoulders bobbed, and her head dropped. That was not what he was
going for, and it broke his heart to have put her in this
position. Reminding himself that this was a necessary step, and
her reaction was only temporary, he took a deep breath. "Forgive
me, I've been too frank." He reached a hand to her shoulder.

"No, he'll be..." She shrugged his hand away and pushed past
him, moving to stand in front of the window before correcting
herself. "They'll be back."

Lex sighed as he followed her. How could he make her see? "Lois,
please," he said as he reached for her shoulder again.

"Stay away from me," she growled and used her hand to knock his
arm away. Turning to face him, he saw both fear and determination
in her eyes, a formidable combination.

"Lois," he breathed, looking down at her fisted hands before
returning to her fury-filled eyes. "I have always loved you from
the bottom of my heart. Please, darling, I just want to help."

"No!" she shouted and shoved him away. Rushing back to the
door, she pounded more furiously than before. "Someone let me
out!" she yelled at the door.

Lex closed his eyes and reached into his pocket. He hadn't
wanted it to be this way but could see no other alternative now.
He pulled the small syringe out of his pocket, removed the cap
from the needle, and positioned it appropriately in his hand. He
stepped up behind her and whispered, "*Everything* I do is
because I love you." Then he pinched a spot on her shoulder hard
enough that she couldn't pull free, quickly inserted the
syringe, and injected the golden fluid.

A sharp intake of breath preceded a scream. But it died away
quickly as her eyes rolled back, and her eyelids closed. Lex
dropped the syringe and reached to catch her. Swiftly picking her
up, he carried her to the couch. He brushed her hair from her
face gently, as if she were made of porcelain, allowing his eyes
to take in all of her. All that was this extraordinary woman
would now be his. Slowly, he leaned forward and gently pressed
his lips to her forehead. "I'm sorry, my dear," he whispered.
"I promise I'll make it up to you."

Grasping her hand, he was reminded of the ring on her left hand.
He chuckled once more at Clark's now broken promise before
removing it and tucking it in his pocket before calling for
Travis.

***

November 21, 1995

Lex stood still in his living room as a flood of emotions swept
over him, causing him to close his eyes slowly and inhale deeply.
He had finally reached the culmination of his efforts, all these
weeks of work leading to this one point in time. Careful
planning, patient preparation, and determined perseverance were
his greatest attributes, and they had not failed him in this.

Nearly bursting with anticipation, Lex picked up a picture frame
resting on the shelf. Lois, in a most exquisite and delicate
wedding gown, was positioned in front of him, leaning back with a
hesitant smile on her face. Soon, she would arrive, and while
he'd taken from her everything she held dear, he would replace
it with his most sincere affection, and she wouldn't even
realize what she'd lost.

He would change that hesitant smile into one filled with
passion.

For him.

Lex placed the picture back in its spot and reached for a frame
on the wall as the sound of a door opening and closing drifted
into the room. He subdued his excitement lest he not fit into the
mold he'd made for himself and Lois. To her, it would simply be
another arrival home from an assignment.

To him, it was the beginning of the rest of his life.

Scott entered the room first, carrying several pieces of luggage
with a large bag full of camera equipment pulling his shoulders
back.

And then she walked in.

Delicate grace and breathtaking beauty.

"--have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself," she was
saying. "I wonder where--" She stopped when she saw him and
threw the most dazzling smile Lex had ever seen in his
direction.

Though he was always master over his emotions, this would surely
be his most demanding trial yet. His heart raced, and every ounce
of control he possessed went into remaining reasonable in his
excitement to see her. In her mind, she had only been absent a
few days, though it had been an eternity to him.

"Lex!" she said, still smiling. She walked over to him and
quickly planted her lips on his as he worked to only gently grasp
her arm. His lips were consumed by the fire that lingered.
"I've missed you! It feels so good to be home."

"And I have missed you, darling," Lex breathed, leaning forward
to lightly brush his lips on the delicate skin of her cheek as he
unwillingly relinquished his hold.

"That story was a waste of time," she said, shirking her jacket
from her shoulders and draping it over the back of the sofa.
"Brenda really needs to get better at sniffing those out before
sending me out like that."

"I'm sorry to hear it." He stood motionless, transfixed,
staring.

She seated herself on the sofa. "At least I had Scott to keep me
company. Though his stories are a little boring, he plays a mean
poker game," she teased, winking at him.

"Well, you won't have to put up with me any longer," Ferguson
assured her. "I have to get home to Samantha and Mom, make sure
they're doing all right."

"Tell Samantha I said 'Hi,'" she said as she propped her feet
up on the table. "See you tomorrow, Scott."

"Tomorrow." Ferguson gave a brief wave in her direction and
nodded to Lex before exiting.

"What's that you have there?" she asked, rising from the couch
and gesturing toward the frame he still held behind his back.

"Oh," he said, surprised. It had slipped his mind when she
arrived. He glanced down at it before replying, "It's our
marriage certificate." He pulled the frame from behind him, and
she took it from his hands.

"Why did you take it off the wall?" she asked. She walked to
the place on the wall where it had been and hung it back in its
place, studying it for a moment before turning to look at him
with an expectant smile gracing her lips.

"Remembering, my darling," he said wistfully, wrapping his arms
around her. She reached up to link her arms around his neck, and
he breathed in deeply, savoring the scent of her, the feel of her
in his arms, her affection. "Just remembering."

"Did you manage alright without me?" He could hear the playful
tone in her voice and smiled as she slowly closed her eyes and
opened them.

"It was dreadful," he exaggerated. "Never leave me again." He
squeezed her tightly and lifted her from the ground, swinging her
around.

The easy laughter that erupted from her took his breath away, and
he was beyond pleased to be the cause of it. "I'm sure you did
fine," she said, laughing.

"No, I am in earnest. I simply *cannot* live without you."
Looking into her eyes as he lowered her to the floor, he craved
her, and, in a husky voice, said, "Now that you are home, I
thought we could do some... things together."

"What did you have in mind?" she teased, playing with the hair
at the nape of his neck.

Finding it a staggering distraction, he swallowed, allowing her
to see how she affected him. "Well, you have been away for
several days." But he'd been waiting far longer than that. He
nuzzled her ear and spread delicate kisses down her neck as he
whispered, "I've... missed... having you near."

The pleasure of successfully completing his plans filled Lex. As
Lois leaned her head back and exhaled in enjoyment, Lex
questioned whether any moment had or would ever top this one.

***

Part 3 -- "Our greatest glory is not in never falling..." --
Confucius

***

Chapter 10

January 20, 1996

She was lying flat on her back on the sofa in the spacious living
room, one arm draped over her eyes and the other resting across
her abdomen, her bare feet propped up on the armrest. She still
felt as though the room was spinning around her though slower now
than it had been. The evening had started out so wonderfully --
Lois had been filled with nostalgia and tenderness, celebrating
an anniversary with her beloved husband.

Another wave of nausea attempted to overtake her senses, and she
rolled to her side and pulled her knees up to her chest as she
remembered instead the memories that had assailed her at the
sound of a few lines from a song.

Memories of Clark Kent.

Her mind was cluttered with contradictions. She couldn't be sure
what was real and what wasn't. But she was sure Lex must have
done *something* to put her in this position.

"Will you be alright?" a concerned voice interrupted her
thoughts. Scott sat in a chair at the end of the coffee table
with his elbows on the armrests, wringing his hands and looking
at her with a deep frown. He hadn't said much in the car on the
way to this house that she couldn't quite refer to as home at
the moment. He had said he was trying to help, but she was too
focused on maintaining what little composure she had remaining to
participate in any conversation, and he'd eventually stopped
trying.

"I don't know," she managed to say. She wasn't sure she'd
ever be alright again. Not after...

She felt tears welling in her eyes.

"The memories will continue to come back over time," he
explained. "I don't fully understand the process, but the
physical symptoms you have are normal, I believe. I don't know
how long they'll last."

"How did this happen?" she asked quietly, hoping for an
explanation that would make any of this make more sense. But she
would be denied one for now. She was startled by the sound of a
door closing. Scott, startled as well, quickly stood up and
walked toward the sound.

"Where is she?" she heard Lex's voice and was filled with a
sense of dismay.

She remembered Scott telling her that she would need to keep up
the charade until... She didn't know how long. They hadn't
discussed that yet. She would have to put a mask on to conceal
everything running through her mind and pretend as best she
could. How fortunate that she was legitimately sick at the
moment.

Scott stepped back into the room and was immediately followed by
Lex with a... caring... and *compassionate* expression on his
face. Who *was* this man? He rushed to her side and knelt in
front of her gently massaging her shoulder with one hand and
taking one of her hands in the other. She resisted the urge to
yank her hand away and instead angled her face away from him and
toward the couch cushion, closing her eyes.

"Lois, my darling," Lex soothed, giving her shoulder a gentle
squeeze. "Are you alright? What has happened?"

"She was complaining of a headache while we danced," Scott
answered for her, a godsend. "From the looks of it, I'd say
it's a migraine." She kept her eyes closed but heard what
sounded like Scott walking closer and leaning against something.

"Oh, Lois," Lex said sympathetically. He moved his hand from
her shoulder to brush her hair from her face with such intimacy.
She felt a tear slide from the corner of her eye down to the end
of her nose. She felt it wiped away and swallowed to suppress the
rest of them.

"She... uh..." Scott trailed off, "tossed her cookies... right
before we left the Lexor."

Lois groaned at the memory. "I'm sorry," she finally managed
to say. "I didn't mean to ruin the evening. Maybe it was
something I ate." Her stomach was still doing flips in her
abdomen, especially when thoughts of what she'd realized this
evening popped into her head. She would have to figure out how to
stop that from happening if she was going to keep playing the
role.

"Not at all, darling," he said, waving away her worry. His
hands came together to gently hold hers. "I feel terrible that
this has happened. Shall I get Dr. Hightower to come and take a
look at you?"

"No!" she exclaimed. She still had very little understanding of
what was going on, but a doctor could see through her and report
everything to Lex. She couldn't risk that. "No," she said more
calmly, "I'm sure it will pass on its own."

"If it's a migraine," Scott cut in, "there will be little to
be done. And if it were something she ate, it's already gone.
I'm sure she'll be fine in a day or two. She heard him stand up
and move about the room. "I'll just be heading out now."

She refused to open her eyes until she sensed Lex stand up and
watched him move toward Scott.

"Scott," Lex called to him, extending his hand to shake
Scott's. Scott turned and took the hand. "Thank you for seeing
her safely home." Lex released Scott's hand and patted him on
the shoulder. "I appreciate it greatly. I will take care of
things from here."

"Certainly, Lex," Scott said with a nod. Scott caught Lois's
eye, and she read reassurance in his expression. "She's in your
capable hands now. I'll see you Monday, Lois. Give me a call if
you need anything." He nodded to Lois with a small wave and left
the room. He must not believe she was in any immediate danger to
have left her alone with him and that gave her some peace of
mind.

Lex turned back to Lois and suggested gently, "My darling, let
me help you to the bedroom. You'll be much more comfortable
there."

"No!" she cried "No, the *idea* of moving makes me feel worse.
I--I don't think I could make it there..." She closed her eyes
and gently shook her head. When she opened her eyes, Lex was
again kneeling in front of her, his face filled with concern. She
couldn't reconcile this man with the one she knew he must be.
Maybe something had happened to him, too. "Can you... just cover
me up with a blanket?" she implored.

"What if I carry you?" he suggested, reaching his arm around
her waist.

"Please, no," she said quickly, holding up a hand to stop him.
He leaned down to touch his forehead to hers in a very
affectionate gesture that only confused her more.

"Of course, darling," he conceded. "I'll bring one right
away." He kissed her cheek before going to fulfill her request.

She breathed a sigh of relief as he left the room. She rolled
once again onto her back and felt a pounding in her temples. A
few tears leaked from her eyes. The sick feeling in her stomach
was still there, and she grabbed a nearby throw pillow to press
to her abdomen.

Lex returned just then with several pillows and blankets. He
tossed one of each onto the love seat across the coffee table
from the sofa where Lois reclined. He then came to her side and
gently lifted her head as he placed one of the pillows where her
head had rested. "Here you are," he whispered as he lowered her
head back down. He stood and began shaking the blanket he brought
to unfold it. "I will sleep on the love seat," he informed
her.

She turned her head to look up at him then, a surprised frown on
her face. "Lex, you don't have to do that."

"Oh, but I want to," he responded. She rolled back onto her
side again as he spread the blanket over her. He knelt again in
front of her and began running his fingers through her hair in a
way she didn't want to admit was soothing.

She closed her eyes at the strange mix of emotions that assaulted
her. "There's no reason for us to both be uncomfortable," she
said as she shook her head to clear it and willed him to
understand.

"Nonsense," Lex countered. "I wouldn't be comfortable at all
knowing you were out here like this." She felt him kiss her
forehead. "You lay here and relax." He pulled the blanket up
over her shoulders and gently rested his hand on her hip. "I've
got some reading to keep me company. And if you need anything
I'll be right here." He patted her hip and moved away.

She was disappointed that he had chosen to stay but immensely
relieved she had found a way to avoid sleeping in the same bed
with him. Her exhaustion from the intensely emotional evening was
catching up with her, and she considered how she would avoid the
bedroom in the coming nights as she drifted into a fitful sleep.

***

Perry would not risk the newspaper on false accusations directed
at the most loved and powerful man in Metropolis. Jimmy would
eventually have to see that, and Perry would put him off until he
did. At the moment, though, it seemed that Jimmy wasn't going to
let it go. Not yet.

"Jimmy, it's getting late, you should head home." Which was
true. Only the editor in chief needed to stay this late and that
was even questionable.

"No, Chief. I think we have something here." Jimmy stepped
closer and perched himself on the edge of Perry's desk,
thrusting the folder full of his notes in Perry's direction.
"This could be the biggest thing since Superman left."

Perry closed his eyes and huffed. Jimmy had really grown up
lately. He insisted on being taken seriously when he thought
something was important. Funny, Perry taught him that, but now he
wished he'd just let something go. When he opened his eyes
again, Jimmy sat there still holding out the folder with a look
of determination in his eyes. With a deep breath, Perry conceded.
"Fine. Let me see the picture."

Perry jerked the folder from his hands and opened it up. A
quarter inch of papers was topped with a short stack of 8x10
prints. The first was the grainy image he'd seen before with two
individuals facing each other, their arms both extended between
them holding something. He set that one aside and looked at the
next image. It was just the head of the person on the left, from
the previous picture, zoomed in. This clearly showed Dr. Gregory
Paulson, his face scrunched as if angry about something. Seeing
this face was not surprising since Jack had been trailing behind
Paulson to catch the shots.

The third picture brought Perry's thoughts to a halt. Clear as
day, Lex Luthor's face was the one just below the brim of the
hat. It was his outstretched hand giving or receiving whatever
was contained in the package the two held between them. Perry
didn't like the look he saw in Luthor's eyes at all. It was
completely unlike the philanthropist he knew and respected. This
face was cold and calculating, with a determined slant to his
brow and a slight pursing of his lips.

Maybe Jimmy was right. Maybe there was something here. But he
wasn't yet ready to admit that to Jimmy. He shook his head to
clear it.

"Maybe it's just muffins that Lois baked for the doctor," he
mused, handing the pictures and folder back to Jimmy. He went
back to looking over his storyboards, hoping that was it.

"Ha," Jimmy burst out. "Lois doesn't bake!" He slapped the
folder down on the desk as he stood and started pacing back and
forth. "And why have that exchange take place in *that* parking
garage?"

Perry looked up at Jimmy, silently granting him permission to
continue, before busying himself with his editing.

"So," Jimmy started, "You know these allegations started up
about two months ago, but no one has any evidence. And the first
seven didn't make it to trial because of that. You also know
that eleven more claims have been filed, and the medical board is
under pressure to do something." Jimmy ticked off his points on
his fingers.

"Right," Perry acknowledged, expecting something profound to
come next. He kept his head down, listening without
acknowledging. Jimmy would have to prove his point just like any
other reporter. More so in this case, given the person in
question.

"What you don't know yet," Jimmy said as he stopped to face
Perry, clearly pleased with himself, "because I only just found
out about it this afternoon, is that *eighteen* more cases are in
the process of being filed. That is, *eighteen*," Jimmy
emphasized the word with his tone and his arms, "more patients
and families have come forward with the same set of claims."

That caught Perry's attention. "Say what now?"

"And they're collecting evidence." *Evidence*, Perry loved the
sound of that word. Almost as much as *hard facts*. "They claim
that the patients in question are occasionally unable to remember
things that happened to them. *And* they are remembering things
that they don't fully understand."

Perry set down his pen to give Jimmy his full attention. "What
kind of things?" he asked as he steepled his hands over his
work.

"Not sure yet. But get this," Jimmy expanded, "some of the
patients have physical copies of their health records... and they
don't match the digital copies." A grin took over Jimmy's face
like he'd just solved a mystery. Only the mystery was just
beginning. "Something is wrong here."

An enlivening sense of anticipation coursed through Perry's
veins. It had been a while since any truly noteworthy stories had
come their way. "How many of them didn't match?" he asked
unable to keep his excitement from his voice.

"Thirteen," Jimmy answered. "Some of the new claimants pointed
this out, and others from the previous group are looking into
it." He sat forward in the chair, leaning on his knees. "I've
contacted as many of them as I could already and set up
interviews with two families." With this he stood, collected his
folder from Perry's desk, and nodded with a wiggle of his
eyebrows.

Perry gave a half smile and picked his pen back up to continue
his work. "Alright. Keep me posted."

*Jimmy's a good kid*, Perry thought once more.

***

Chapter 11

January 21, 1996

Sunlight reached Lois's face. As she rolled away from the
brightness, her stomach gave a strange lurch, and she immediately
remembered the events of the night before. She groaned and
continued rolling onto her stomach, propping her head up on her
hands and looking around the room.

It was *their* living room. She had memories of relaxing here on
this very couch, watching tv with Lex. Was that real? How long
had she lived like this? As Lex's *wife*?

Clark's face entered her thoughts and instinct told her which of
those memories were right. There were still plenty of missing
pieces, and she wasn't sure if it would all come back or not.
All she knew was that this was a peculiar situation, and she
would have to handle it carefully. She had no idea what Lex would
do... what he had done.

"Good morning, my love," Lex said as he walked into the room
carrying a tray of what smelled like breakfast. "How are you
feeling now?" He set the tray down on the coffee table and sat
down on the couch next to her, placing his hand on the small of
her back and caressing it with slow, small circles.

At first, his touch was pleasant, and she let out a small sigh.
Suddenly, her stomach turned. "Oh God," she said hoarsely,
covering her mouth. She clambered off of the sofa, hopped over
the coffee table, and darted to the bathroom just across the
hall.

Having not eaten anything yet, there was very little to come up,
and she leaned miserably on the edge of the toilet seat, her face
wet with tears. How long would this last, and what was she going
to tell Lex?

She heard the water come on at the sink and knew Lex had come to
take care of her, as strange as it was. She thought of several
instances of his caring for her over the past couple of months
and knew then that if she could keep her *other* memories to
herself, keep them separated from the ones she had of him, that
he would not hurt her in the least. He placed a cool cloth on the
back of her neck and brushed her hair from her face with his
fingers.

"Let me call Dr. Hightower," he requested. "He could be here
in a few minutes, and you can--"

"No, please. I..." she started, not relinquishing her position.
Immediately, a thought struck her as the perfect pretense.
"I..." But she wasn't sure she could say it. What
ramifications would such a confession have? She didn't have
enough time to consider them and knew this would take care of
some other issues she was sure to face in the next few days. "I
think I might be... pregnant," she said, hoping she sounded
sincere.

Lex was instantly at her side on his knees, one hand on her back,
the other gently cupping her cheek and turning her face toward
his. She risked opening her eyes and saw such delight that she
felt... guilty? She knew she shouldn't care about this man, who
was evil after all, but her memories, true or not, prevented her
from hating him.

"Lois..." he said, looking deep into her eyes. "That is the
most wonderful thing you have ever said to me." He leaned
forward and kissed her on the top of her head.

She allowed a small, exhausted smile to show. Lex quickly got up
and rushed from the room.

Maybe this wouldn't be too hard. She pushed herself up and used
the washcloth to wipe her face. She was still wearing her
extravagant, and now wrinkled, dress from the night before and
felt the need to take a long hot shower to cleanse herself. She
would wait for that until after Lex had left the house,
regardless of how long that took. She made her way slowly to the
sink and looked at herself in the mirror, seeing this *new* Lois
for the first time.

Her red-rimmed eyes sat above dark circles, the exhaustion of the
last twelve hours was clearly written all over her face. Red
lines from the creases in the couch cushion ran down her cheek,
and what was left of her make-up was smudged. She reached up to
touch her short hair that stuck out in various directions, and
she couldn't believe she'd let anyone see her like this.

She sucked in a breath as Lex came back in carrying her bathrobe
and the plate of food from earlier. He set them down on the
counter. "No, Lois, you are breathtaking," he said and reached
carefully around her to put his hands on her abdomen, meeting her
eyes in the mirror. It was such an affectionate gesture, and Lois
found herself covering his hands with hers. He nuzzled her ear
with his nose and whispered, "I love you."

Lois leaned her head forward away from his. This mix of affection
and distrust, contentment and anxiety, was only adding to the
sour feeling in her stomach. She let out a nervous laugh.

"I have a few errands to run this morning," he explained as he
moved his hands to her shoulders. "You take a nice hot shower
and relax. I will be back in a couple of hours, and we'll
celebrate." He gave her shoulders a gentle squeeze and smiled at
her reflection. Was that a twinkle in his eye?

She turned her head to the side. "Thank you, Lex," she said,
surprised at the sincerity she felt.

He kissed her temple. "No," he whispered into her ear, "Thank
*you*." He squeezed her shoulders once more before turning to
leave.

She breathed a sigh of relief, knowing she had some time to
herself to sort things out. The mixture of contradictory emotions
was going to get the best of her. She shook her head and
swallowed hard, reaching to turn the hot water on.

***

It had been a few weeks since Clark had gone to work feeling this
worthless. Not that he was surprised. He hadn't been able to get
back to sleep after Lana had left and his morning run just
didn't help center himself like it usually did. His mind was out
of sorts, distracted, and worried he wouldn't be able to focus
and do his job correctly. But he *had* to attend a special
meeting the city council was holding.

The purpose of the meeting was to discuss the current city sewer
issue in the downtown area. It was built hundreds of years ago,
and the area was growing up, not out, putting stress on all the
systems but most notably the sewer. The city council would
address the problems and propose solutions.

Surely, he could manage sitting through a boring, slow-paced
meeting and write it up well enough without messing it up. He
wouldn't need to ask questions if he didn't feel like it, he
could just observe and allow others present to do the
questioning. He would listen and write about it. It had worked in
the past on some of his gloomier days before coming to Columbia.

But no. In addition to being late to the meeting, he couldn't
focus at all. Here he was, sitting in the back of the room,
unable to listen for more than a few seconds at a time, with as
much of an idea of what was said about the sewer issue as a
person two blocks away.

Two months. This time he'd lasted longer than at any of his
previous jobs. Deep down, he knew that he wasn't cut out for
this job. Lois had pointed that much out more than two years
ago.

Maybe now Lana would believe it.

He ran his hand over his face and looked at his blank notepad.

John Zartaga, a reporter for the other paper in town, The
Missourian, leaned over and snickered when he saw the blank
notepad. Clark should have closed it. A long time ago. When he
realized they were done talking about the sewer problems. When he
realized he wasn't going to write anything down.

When he realized he should have left.

"I think my baby sister was taking notes in the back of the
room. She's here with her middle school class," Zartaga said,
pretending to look over everyone in that direction. "You might
be able to pay her to write your story for you." Zartaga paused
before leaning over to whisper, "She'd probably do a better
job."

Clark slammed his notebook closed and took a deep breath to calm
himself. Zartaga was just pestering him. If Clark ignored him, he
would go away. If only it were that easy.

"Don't take yourself so seriously, Kent," Zartaga sneered.
"No one else does."

Then again, maybe Zartaga was right. Clark stood up and quietly
walked out of the meeting.

If his dad hadn't pulled strings to get him here, he probably
wouldn't have even been offered this job. And he was terrible at
it. Everyone knew it. He should just quit. Let a more qualified
person take over the position.

Would his dad send him away again if he went home now?

***

Chapter 12

Lois was relieved that she had some time to clean up, relax, and
figure out what she would do without Lex around. He was still
gone when she finished her shower. She went in search of the
photo albums that they kept on a bookshelf in the living room.
She remembered looking through them on occasion with Lex and
wondered whether seeing the photos would help her figure out what
was real.

As Lois walked around their house, she felt at odds. It was both
familiar and new at the same time. She couldn't shake the
overwhelming confusion that seemed to follow her. She had come in
the front door, placed her keys in the bowl on the table, and
then walked down this hallway countless times. But looking down
the hall at the closed front door made it seem like it was just a
dream. Yet here she was in the very house in which that dream
took place.

In the living room, she found the shelf and pulled out several of
the photo albums. The albums were not labeled but were different
colors that she couldn't quite explain the meaning of. She sat
down in the middle of the same sofa that she had slept on last
night and set all but one of the albums next to her.

The first album was burgundy and sported a faux suede feel. She
opened its cover and found a picture of her and Lex dressed for
their wedding. It was a close-up picture of just their faces
looking at each other. No big grins or huge smiles graced their
faces, but instead, they intensely gazed at each other as if they
were about to kiss.

The nausea returned. Every time she thought about the predicament
she was currently trapped in, how she was married to Lex when she
was supposed to be with Clark, she was overwhelmed with a sense
of infidelity on her part. How had this even happened? How could
she not know the answers to all the questions swimming around in
her head?

So far, she remembered Clark... Superman... leaving to see what
remnants of his home planet existed. She vaguely remembered that
their plans for a romantic evening together had been interrupted
to learn about this improbable possibility. She very clearly
remembered that she had planned on telling Clark she wanted to
say 'yes' to his proposal. She tried to swallow the guilt down
and put her cool fingers on her forehead.

Was she having an affair? Certainly, she hadn't known until now,
and she didn't understand what events happened to get her here,
but she recalled the intimacy she shared with Lex as part of this
marriage and couldn't bear to think of what this would do to her
relationship with Clark.

She didn't even know where Clark was.

Or what ridiculous situation he'd been placed in.

The nausea increased, and she took a slow, deep breath to clear
it. She reminded herself that losing control and sinking into
despair would help no one before turning back to the album.

The next page had a picture of Lois walking down the aisle toward
Lex. Her white dress had a plunging neckline on the lace bodice
above a satin trumpet skirt. A bustle was gathered at the back,
beginning the long train that trailed behind her. Full length
sleeves covered her arms and a veil covered her hair, which was
left down and decorated with elegant beads and gemstones. The
look on her face was one of nervousness.

Unbidden, another memory surfaced, and she was at her afternoon
wedding, walking down the aisle.

###

*May 8, 1994*

*She walked down the aisle toward Lex, slowly, nervously. She
turned to see the guests attending the ceremony, and her heart
sank as she noted the absence of her friends and turned back only
to be surprised by the person officiating the wedding.*

"*The Archbishop?" she asked, stunned.*

"*Yes, I'm sorry," Lex whispered to her, "the Pope had a
prior engagement." He turned to take in her features, his gaze
roaming her face, finally resting on her eyes. "You look...
beautiful," he said in awe as he took her hand and tucked it
under his arm.*

*She smiled at his kind words and together they turned forward,
and she was relieved she was no longer facing him. But all she
felt was pity as she recalled the intensity of the one-sided
conversation she'd just had with herself before the ceremony.*

*The Archbishop began the ceremony. "Dearly beloved, we are
gathered here today in the sight of God and in the presence of
these witnesses to join together this man and this woman in holy
matrimony."*

*As Lois shifted from one foot to the other, Lex put his free
hand over hers and gave it a gentle squeeze that did the opposite
of what he had intended. Could she say no when the time came?*

"*If anyone knows why this union should not take place," the
Archbishop continued, "let them speak now or forever hold their
peace." A short pause followed, and Lois wondered why her
friends weren't there to speak up for her. Why wasn't she
speaking up for herself? She was beginning to realize she
couldn't do this.*

"*Do you, Lex," he continued, unaware of the emotional struggle
building in her mind, "take this woman to be your wedded bride
from this day forward, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in
health, to love and to cherish, until death do you part?"*

*Lois looked at Lex as the last part was said. Did he love her?
Lex briefly turned to her and smiled before looking back at the
archbishop and saying with tenacity, "I do."*

*She slowly turned back to the archbishop and let the words he
was speaking to her sink in. "And do you Lois take this man to
be your wedded husband from this day forward..."*

*Forever?*

"...*for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health..."*

*Would she even be here if Lex hadn't been the subject of that
unattainable interview of the 3rd richest man in the world?*

"...*to love and to cherish, until death do you part?"*

*Did she love Lex?*

"*I..." she started, knowing what needed to be said and unable
to form the words. Then she thought about her missing friends...
and Clark and wished they'd been here with her, to speak for her
when she couldn't. "I..." she tried again.*

*Lex turned to look at her, fear and confusion on his face.
"Lois?" he asked.*

*She turned to look at him with an apology on her face. "I
can't."*

###

*I can't.*

She didn't marry him.

That is how the real wedding had turned out, but she could still
recall a version in which she had said yes. They had kissed and
danced at a party that Perry and Jimmy and all of her friends
were now noticeably absent from. But she knew that wasn't
correct. Was this marriage between her and Lex even real,
official, documented?

She instantly recalled the marriage certificate framed on the
wall across the room and set the album aside to inspect it. When
she reached it, she scrutinized the information it held. The
signature below her name was absolutely hers. The date was listed
as January 20th, 1994. That wasn't even the date of their
original unfinished wedding. What had even happened after that?

She wished she could remember something that would tell her if
she was in fact legally married to Lex at this moment, because
this document had to be a fake.

Suddenly she noticed the name of one of the witnesses. Scott
Ferguson. Here he was again. Was there a ceremony? Was he at it?
Did they merely change the date? She would need to talk to him
about this.

Deciding that thinking further about it wouldn't reveal any
answers, Lois went back to the couch to continue looking at the
photo albums. As she sat down, she decided the wedding album was
not a good choice and placed it on the coffee table in front of
her, picking up instead the next album on the top of the pile
beside her. This one was covered in navy satin. Lois ran her hand
over the cover and opened it up. It proved to be from even
earlier in time, displaying a picture of Lex dancing with her at
the White Orchid Ball.

Engulfed again, she sat back on the couch.

###

*September 17, 1993*

"*Lex Luthor," Lois addressed the man facing away from her as
he welcomed guests to the ball. Her intent was to land a
one-on-one interview with the most famous man in Metropolis, and
this would be the night she did it. As he turned to her, she
asked pointedly, "Why haven't you returned my calls?" The man
looked at her with eyes that were both intrigued and impressed
and politely left the conversation he was currently in to make
his way to her. As he neared she introduced herself, "Lois Lane.
Daily Planet." She put her hand out to shake his.*

*Taking the offered hand, he stared intently into her eyes.
"Well, I can assure you," he began and paused to kiss her hand.
"I'll *never* make that mistake again."*

*Lois smiled at him as he swung her around and pulled her in
close as they danced. "I hope you'll forgive me for being so
bold. I--"*

"*But boldness is a trait I find attractive in a woman, Miss
Lane," Lex interrupted, bringing his face closer to hers.*

*Taken aback by the unexpected compliment, she gave a quick laugh
while maintaining eye contact. "Thank you," she said. She
looked down briefly to clear her head. Luthor was not at all what
she had expected. "Anyway," she continued, "Mr. Luthor,
I--"*

"*Lex," he insisted and spun her away from him.*

"*Lex," she corrected herself. Just then, he pulled her back
in. She wondered if his flirtatious style was commonplace or if
he was only behaving this way for her. Pushing onward, she
continued, "I know that your hesitant to give interviews."*

"*Well you can understand," he began to explain. "A man in my
position. I wouldn't want to be misinterpreted," he said in a
breathy voice, further reducing the distance between them. She
smiled and had no choice but to be enamored with the charismatic
man in front of her. "I have had one or two bad experiences with
the media."*

*She laughed again to relieve the excitement she felt building.
"But not with me," she pointed out.*

"*So," he countered, "Why don't we make it..." He paused,
glancing at her neck and then nuzzling her ear with his nose as
he whispered, "dinner." He came back just enough to look into
her face, his eyes smoldering with interest.*

*She'd only wanted an interview, but suddenly she wanted more.
"I'd love that," she responded simply, a small smile touching
her lips.*

"*As would I." He squeezed the hand he held and swung her
around. "I look forward to getting to know you better."*

*She was completely captivated and somewhat nervous as he
continued to look intently into her eyes. She couldn't look away
as he led her. Aware of his hand holding hers and the firm
embrace he held her in, she wondered what kind of man he was.
She'd expected someone distant, apathetic toward those not in
his inner circle. But this man was... something else.*

*He spun her again and smiled at her. "You seem so tense," he
pointed out. "Have I done something to offend you?"*

"*No, I..." she started, shaking her head, "I'm just...
surprised. You are not what I thought you'd be."*

"*I'm glad," he said with a quick lift of his eyebrows. As the
song ended, he brought her hand to his lips and lingered over it
with a kiss.*

*Her breath caught. No one had ever treated her with such class.
"Thank you for the dance," she finally managed to say.*

"*It was my pleasure." He released her hand and turned to walk
away, leaving her alone with the feeling of having been swept off
her feet.*

###

*No*, she thought, shaking her head adamantly. *That wasn't it.
Clark was there. He'd interrupted that dance. *And she had been
so mad at him for it. She'd had to convince him to come to the
event in the first place, and then he'd only frustrated her with
his cutting in and attempts to stop her snooping.

She smiled at the memory. It had been annoying then, but she
later understood what he was doing.

A closing door stopped her reverie, and she looked up nervously.
Lex must be home. She considered her options and decided to use
the current circumstance to her advantage. She could talk with
Lex about their wedding and the ball, see if she could glean some
information from him.

She could do this, she could pretend to be in love with him.

*To be pregnant*, she suddenly remembered.

She looked up as he entered the living room and smiled at him. He
was carrying something behind his back and carefully maneuvered
around the furniture, keeping it hidden. "Hello, my darling,"
he greeted her.

"Lex," she responded as she leaned to the side, trying to peek
around him. "What's that you have there?"

He sat down next to her, opposite the stack of albums and shook
his head with a smirk. "No, no," he said as he leaned to block
her view. "Not yet."

She looked at his face then and was surprised by the happiness
she saw there. He must have released whatever he was holding
because his hand came forward to caress her cheek, and he leaned
slowly forward. All of her memories of him included this openly
affectionate man that affected her in ways she now found very
confusing. She realized then he was about to kiss her.
Suddenly... luckily, the nausea returned with force, and she
covered her mouth as she got up and bumped into the coffee table
in her rush to reach the bathroom.

How convenient. She would have no trouble convincing Lex she was
pregnant. As an added benefit, she guessed that he would also be
less interested in intimacy. Or at least she hoped that would be
the case.

Again, Lex came in behind her and offered her a cool washcloth.
She expected to see concern on his face as she had last time, but
when she looked up, he was grinning widely at her instead. She
laughed and shook her head. "I'm glad you are enjoying this,"
she said sarcastically.

He quickly shook his head, dropping the grin, and knelt down
beside her. "I'm sorry," he apologized, "I don't enjoy
this." He placed his hand on her knee. "But I can't hide my
happiness about what this means." He paused, holding her gaze.
"About our future child."

She felt a stab of regret at her decision to use the unfortunate
symptoms of her returning memories to her advantage. He would
certainly be devastated and angry when he learned the truth. But
he'd put her in this position in the first place, and now she
needed a way to keep him at a distance, however short that
distance might be. She shook her head and smiled outwardly while
chastising herself inwardly. Why should she care about how this
affected him?

Lois took the washcloth from him and stood up. Lex supported her
as she rose. "Come back to the living room when you are done
here," he said as he squeezed her elbow and then left.

Before she went back, she mentally prepared herself to spend some
time with Lex, taking deep breaths and repeating to herself that
she could do this. She wasn't sure how long she'd been living
this lie, but she couldn't remember any instances in which he
had done anything malicious or dangerous. That realization made
her more confident that she was safe with Lex... as long as he
didn't suspect anything.

When she returned to the living room, she found Lex seated in the
spot she'd left, holding the album she'd been looking through.
He looked up as she entered. "Feeling better, I hope?" he
asked, smiling. Yes, his eyes were twinkling. "You are glowing,
you know."

She laughed. That simply wasn't possible, but perhaps he was
seeing what he wanted to see. The thought struck a nerve, but she
shook it off. "Stop," she said jokingly as she took the seat
beside him, careful to show just enough affection.

"You were looking through these albums, I see." He turned a few
pages and admired the pictures.

"Yeah," she admitted, looking over his arm at the images. "I
was feeling... a little sentimental, I guess," she explained.

He turned another page. "About?" he asked, his attention on the
album before him.

"The first time we danced," she said as she reached over his
arm and pointed at the picture. It had clearly been taken from
the balcony above by someone but displayed them looking directly
at each other, both smiling.

"Ah," Lex agreed. "One of my favorites." As he looked
intently at the picture, she leaned back in her seat, shifting
her focus to Lex.

He sat there, reclining comfortably with his slippered feet
propped on the coffee table, a small smile touching the corners
of his mouth, his usual assertive confidence softened. He could
be so intense at times, yet here was, looking through pictures
and seeming so... normal. Relaxed. Content.

Was this real?

"You asked me to dinner that night." She watched as he slowly
ran his finger over her image.

"And you agreed," he pointed out. He turned his head to face
her with a sincere smile on his face. "It was the beginning of a
new and wonderful adventure for me."

"Hmm." She drew her legs up to her chest, hoping to discourage
any more closeness from Lex. "I recall having my own adventures
that night as well," she said.

"Yes, I do recall. You were in my office." He chuckled as he
looked back at the album and continued turning pages. The
pictures he looked over now were of other guests at the ball.

Lois continued to watch Lex, weighing what she would say next.
She wished she could just ask outright what had happened.
"Yes," she ventured with a grin on her face. "You found u--"
She stopped herself just before saying 'us,' recalling just in
the nick of time that Clark hadn't been there in his version.
She tucked her hair behind her ear before speaking again. "You
found me later." She smiled shyly at him, pretending to be
embarrassed for another reason.

"Yes." Lex smiled and eyed her without turning his head from
the album. "Snooping, if I recall."

"Investigating." She watched him carefully to see if he showed
any signs of having noticed the mistake she almost made.

He smiled as he continued to remember that evening. "It was
raining that night," he pointed out, "or I would have taken you
out on the balcony to get a better look at the view." He closed
the navy album and patted it with his hands.

"The rain added to the whimsy of the evening," she added.

"It did, didn't it." He smiled, a wistful look in his eyes. He
leaned forward, placed the navy album down, and picked up the
burgundy wedding album. "It was not raining at our wedding,
though."

"No," Lois admitted, "it was clear and bright." She shifted
on the couch again to see his face better. What could she ask
that might shed light on what happened without tipping him off?
"Were you nervous?" she asked.

Lex looked at her and smiled brightly. "Not at all." He set the
album down with the others and then turned his body toward her,
bringing his knee up onto the couch beside her. "I was finally
getting everything I wanted in life," he said as he took her
hand from where it rested on her knee. His words were so
endearing, the kind of things girls dream of hearing. "If I
recall, you looked quite nervous up there beside me."

She chuckled, recalling the nervous look on her own face in the
picture. "Well, my friends weren't there..." Were they?
Something flitted across his eyes, and his smile straightened a
small amount. Had she made a mistake? She smiled and looked at
their connected hands, stroking his fingers with her thumb in the
hopes of distracting him. "I mean, next to me," she amended.
"Julie, my friend from high school, would have made an excellent
bridesmaid." She dared to look up at him then.

His relaxed smile told her he had accepted it. He nodded as he
suggested, "We can recreate the event sometime, and she can be
there with you."

She sighed, infusing it with wistfulness to cover her aversion to
the idea.

Lex squeezed her hand. "Listen, darling," he started, "I
haven't had lunch yet. Would you care to join me?" He stood up
and reached his hand toward hers.

"Um..." She thought for a brief moment. She'd done well enough
just now that she could handle more. She may even have more
opportunities to get more information, if she could figure out
how. "Sure," she agreed with a smile. "I still have an empty
stomach." She reached up to grasp his proffered hand, and he
pulled her up off the couch. As she stood, she caught a glimpse
of the package he had been hiding from her earlier. "Wait," she
insisted, stopping him. "What was that thing you were hiding
behind your back?" She glanced back toward the end of the couch
where he'd set it.

"Oh, right!" he said quickly. Lois moved out of his way as he
leaned down, reaching for the package. He then stood to hand it
to her. "You..." he smiled at her, "distracted me for a
moment."

He placed the brown paper wrapped package in her hands. "For
me?" Lois asked as she took the box, noting how light it was.
She turned it over in her hands. It looked a bit like a present
except it was void of any decoration or tags.

"Yes, darling." Lex put his hands behind his back and rocked
forward on his toes, like a child with a secret. "Open it," he
said with that twinkle in his eye once more.

She carefully undid the tape to remove the wrapping, revealing a
simple box. Setting the paper down, she took the lid off the
small white box and peered inside. She frowned and felt her mouth
open as she reached in and pulled out the most adorable baby
booties she'd ever seen. They were classic white lace-up shoes,
the kind that parents might have bronzed and displayed on their
mantle. Another unwanted stab of regret hit her, and she looked
up at him with questioning eyes.

"They were mine," he said.

A small gasp escaped her, and he took the box from her other hand
and set it down.

He looked at the booties in her hand as he explained, "My mother
had kept them as a memento. After she died, I kept them, though I
don't really know why." He shrugged before he looked her in the
eye again. A smile pulled up one side of his mouth. "It seemed
like an appropriate gift."

For a moment she forgot that she wasn't pregnant, that she
wasn't in love with him. That he'd done something to her to
replace Clark in her memories. She searched his face. She had
never thought of him as sentimental. Certainly, her current
memories of him painted a picture of a kind and affectionate
husband.

But this.

This was meaningful.

Who was this man?

"Lex..." she finally said. "This is so... sweet." She looked
up at him and smiled the first genuine smile since her eyes were
opened to the predicament she was in. "Thank you." She leaned
forward then and kissed him on the cheek. Startled by her own
action, she quickly turned away and walked the few steps to a
shelf at the side of the room. Pretending was one thing, but she
would have to sort through these memories and soon. Whatever
he'd done to her, it was enough to make her *feel* like she
loved him. And it apparently hadn't worn off completely... yet.

***

Chapter 13

Clark walked down the crowded, construction-laden Ninth street
toward the university. Like any major city in the U.S.,
construction was a constant feature. The loud sounds did little
to drown out his self-deprecating thoughts as he ducked under a
covered path and continued down the sidewalk. He was hoping that
maybe he'd find Lana and they could talk. He needed her, not
just to tell him more about what he was saying in his sleep, but
to help him feel... less like himself.

Less worthless.

The morning had gone horribly. After the long night he'd had, he
should have known it would be this way. Walking slowly with his
head down, he thought about everything that was going wrong. He
hadn't slept. He forgot to eat breakfast. He was ten minutes
late to the city council meeting. He didn't get any information
at the meeting. And Zartaga knew it. He was a complete failure.

And he didn't know where Lana was.

Just then, the furious dinging of a bicycle bell caught his
attention, but before he had time to register where it was coming
from, the handle bar that must have belonged to that bell caught
his left arm as it swung forward with his step. The fabric of his
shirt sleeve wrapped around it, and he felt himself pulled off
balance.

A muffled scream and a crash followed. He found himself tangled
in a pile of bicycle, people, and a chair.

"Geez," he heard from someone underneath him. "You gotta pay
attention man," a kid who looked like he was in college yelled
at him.

Dazed, Clark took in the scene around him. A table had been
pushed back against three occupied chairs with a fourth chair, a
bicycle, and two people wedged underneath. He was stretched on
top of the biker and bike with his own legs sprawled out on the
sidewalk.

"Is everyone okay?" he asked as he looked around what appeared
to be a sidewalk cafe.

He received shocked nods from the three at the table. But the
biker underneath shoved hard to dislodge himself and yelled,
"Get off me!"

Clark attempted to apologize as he quickly got up and reached to
help up the biker. That was when he realized the bike was
completely bent out of shape, and the wrought iron chair was
deformed. Clark wiped his hand across his face in frustration
only to realize he had blood on his cheek. The biker didn't
appear to be physically hurt, but there was no questioning his
anger.

"Are you always such a moron or is today special?" the biker
asked with a sneer.

*Moron*. Add that to the list of Clark's shortcomings.

"I'm sorry," Clark quickly apologized. "I'll replace the
bike," he added, realizing it just wasn't enough.

***

*She slowly turned back to the archbishop and let the words he
was speaking to her sink in. "And do you Lois take this man to
be your wedded husband from this day forward, for richer, for
poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until
death do you part?"*

"*I..." she started. Thinking then about her missing friends...
and Clark, she found she couldn't speak. "I ..." she tried
again.*

*Lex turned to look at her, fear and confusion on his face.
"Lois?" he asked.*

*She turned to look at him, an apology on her face. "I
can't."*

*The doors at the back of the room opened, and a familiar voice
called to her. "Lois!"*

*Turning to see Perry striding down the aisle with Jimmy close
behind him, she breathed a sigh of relief as she threw her veil
back over her head. "Lex," she happily exclaimed, planting a
kiss on his lips. "They came!"*

"*Stop the wedding," he instructed. "You can't marry this
man."*

"*What, is there an echo in here? I just said that."*

"*What's the meaning of this?" Lex asked, confused.*

"*The meaning of this is, Luthor, you're through," Perry said
with a stern look on his face, coming to a stop in front of Lex.
It was then that Lois noticed a large number of police officers
and Detective Henderson who had followed him in. "We have all
the evidence against you we need."*

"*Evidence? Evidence for what?"*

"*This is a warrant for you arrest," Henderson explained,
holding up papers. She looked to Lex to see confusion written on
his face as Henderson continued, "for arson and other crimes too
numerous to mention."*

"*You're out of your minds, both of you." Lex's expression
changed to one of disbelief, but all Lois could do was watch in
confusion.*

"*You have the right to remain silent." Henderson began
reciting the Miranda warning, "You have the right to an
attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be
supplied--"*

"*Will you shut up?" Lex interrupted. "I can afford a thousand
attorneys. I'll have your badge. I'll have your head for this.
Get me the governor on the phone. Get me the president. Get him
on the phone!"*

*Lois stared at him, mouth agape. She'd never seen Lex behave in
any way other than as a gentleman, and it was disconcerting to
think about what might have happened had Perry and Jimmy not
burst in when they did.*

*A commotion at the back of the room drew everyone's attention.
Mrs. Cox was being led in handcuffs down the aisle, a smirk on
her face.*

"*Et tu, Mrs. Cox?" Lex asked.*

*Still processing what was happening, she stood motionless as he
said, "Lois, I'm sorry." She felt her hand drawn upwards as
Lex kissed it. "We'll take a rain check," he continued.
"Something's come up."*

*She let her hand drop, stunned by what was happening.*

"*Let's go pal," Henderson said, clasping his hand on Lex's
arm.*

"*You let go of me!" Lex yelled as he shoved Henderson to the
ground. Lois watched in shock as he rushed away from the scene,
expertly taking down three cops who attempted to stop his exit
before running through a door at the side of the room.*

*Unable to move, she stood transfixed in the nightmare. Evidence?
Were the things Clark eluded to actually true? Had she really
been so blind? Clark was right: she was an investigative
reporter, but she'd never investigated Lex, not really. She felt
duped. Foolish. A laughing stock.*

*Her mother was suddenly, thankfully, at Lois's side. "Oh
honey," she said soothingly, handing her a handkerchief. "I
know things haven't worked out the way you planned, but--"*

"*Why?" Lois interrupted as she dabbed at her eyes. "Isn't
this the way every girl dreams her wedding's gonna be?"*

###

Lois shook her head to clear it. It was getting easier to cope
with the memories as they came, the warning signs giving her just
a few seconds to ready herself. She was also able to recover more
quickly now than last night at the hotel. Conveniently, Lex was
called away to take care of some business, giving her more time
alone to consider everything without having to worry that she
would accidentally reveal that she remembered anything or would
be overcome with a sour stomach. Now, the nausea seemed to only
assault her every time she thought of her current circumstances
or when she was in a position to be intimate with Lex. The only
benefit of that was how it helped her cover seem so believable.

This time, she was already seated at the dining room table and
needed only to set down the mug of coffee she'd been sipping.
After Lex had left, memories continued to resurface. As she
walked through her house, the mere sight of pictures and objects
brought them on. It was becoming difficult to keep track of them
as there were so many. And they were so contradictory. The
investigative reporter in her knew that writing them down would
be the first step to making sense of them. So here she sat at the
dining room table, a pad covered in scribbles in front of her,
tapping a pencil with one hand, her head resting on the other.
She wrote snippets, sipping coffee and sorting everything that
came to mind.

She had nearly two years' worth of memories as a TV reporter,
but it couldn't have really been that long. How peculiar it felt
to think about *work*. Crafting words into profound statements
was still a necessary part of the job, but standing in front of a
camera and saying those words was something she'd never
considered for herself.

Following the anniversary party, Lois had taken the next week off
from work in anticipation of spending quality time with her
husband. Now, her time off would be spent much differently,
trying to piece together reality.

It was becoming a painful process as the differences between what
she thought was real and what was actually real became more
apparent. This last memory of the ending to her ill-fated wedding
to Lex reminded her just how senseless it was to never question
Lex and accept his lies.

She'd remembered what he'd done to the Daily Planet. She'd
remembered the lengths he went to so that she felt like she had
nowhere to turn but to him. He'd choreographed it all.

And now it was happening all over again.

Except now she had no idea how it had even happened.

Her heart ached for Clark. She missed him, needed him... had hurt
him. What did he know? What sort of life had Lex forced him into?
The only thing she knew for certain was that he must be miserable
even though Scott said he was alive and well.

That was another thing. She hadn't seen Scott today, and what
little conversation they did have last night didn't shed much
light on what had happened or how or when. She understood why --
he had to keep up appearances to prevent Lex from questioning his
behavior.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, slowly releasing it
and as much tension as she could.

As far as she could tell from piecing together the memories she
had, she'd been living this lie for two months. Memories from
the moment Clark had appeared in her life were the first ones she
could recognize as changed, every one involving him riddled with
lies. In some cases, only minute details were altered, but others
were drastically transformed. Memories of things that had never
happened were mixed together with events that had been previously
completely inaccessible.

Scribbling as quickly as she could manage, she wrote everything
down that came across her mind. Starting with Clark's arrival,
she made columns to separate those events she knew were real, the
ones she knew were not real, and the memories she wasn't sure
of.

The only thing she was sure of was that the last two months of
memories, though they began with lies, were authentic, and her
awareness of this had been and was still making her physically
ill. That was the hard part.

Knowing she'd been living with Lex as his wife.

*Happily married.*

Her stomach churned. The only thing keeping her from sinking into
a pit of despair too deep to climb out of was the fact that as
reprehensible as it was, it was not something done by choice.
Even if she had seemed willing afterward, Lex had done this to
her. And she couldn't even begin to imagine how he'd done it or
what he'd done.

Her head was beginning to hurt thinking about all of this.
Pushing her chair back from the table, she stood and made her way
back to the living room, taking her pad of notes with her.

How had this happened? How much time had passed after Superman
"left" before this lie began?

Taking a seat on the couch, she glanced around the room only to
catch sight of the baby booties Lex had given her just before
lunch sitting on the end table. She picked them up gently and
examined them more closely without him present to watch. The
solid white leather booties showed the smallest amount of wear.
The laces were tied in a simple bow, one end of the lace longer
than the other.

The man who gave her these booties obviously cared for her, but
how could he be the same person she had been gradually
remembering more about all afternoon? She felt like she knew two
Lex Luthors now -- the corrupt businessman who wanted to destroy
Superman and rule Metropolis, and this thoughtful and caring one
that wanted only her happiness. How could they be the same
person? Had something happened to Lex as well?

She shook her head to stop the mess of thoughts running through
it and set the booties back on the table. This could not be the
same Lex that Lois had remembered. The one who had lied, cheated,
stolen... killed.

She needed a break from all of this, but reminders were
everywhere, and there were so many questions yet to be answered.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she slammed the
notebook closed in frustration.

*A nap is a good idea*, she thought as she shoved the notebook
under the couch. She was overwhelmed and exhausted. She went in
search of a bed that was not theirs and hoped that sleep would
bring some much-needed relief... if only temporarily.

***

"It's just a face," Imogene explained. The dark-haired, older
woman sat with impeccable posture complete with her hands neatly
folded in her lap. "A nice enough looking one, but that's
it."

Jimmy perched on the edge of a flowered love seat in the small
living room of Imogene Hubert. Her husband, Hal, was relaxing in
the chair across from him. "Is it always the same face?" he
asked, jotting a few notes down.

"Oh, yes." She nodded, not bothered by this at all.
"Sometimes, I feel like we're in a big, white room and
sometimes I can't tell where we are, but it's always the same
face."

According to Hal, Imogene had gone to the health care facility to
have a mole removed. She came home without it, but they argued
over whether the procedure had taken place. A bandage covered the
site where it had been, but Imogene insisted that it was merely
covering a scratch she'd received while weeding near her rose
bushes in the garden that morning. Now, the only evidence that a
mole had ever existed was the hard copy health records Hal had
kept.

When Jimmy first arrived, they showed him Imogene's old health
records clearly indicating the mole, its location, and suggested
treatment. Then they showed him the copy of the digital records
that showed no such diagnosis but rather described her skin as
nearly flawless. After discussing what had happened, Imogene
mentioned that it was around the time she started having this
strange dream. And that's what she was trying to explain now.

"It's the same dream the other two we've met with kept
mentioning," Hal explained. Hal had talked with some of the
other claimants to see what could be done, and it was at one of
their meetings that they discovered several of the patients had
been having the same strange dream of a face.

"And this dream started the same time this procedure supposedly
happened?"

"Yes," Hal cut in. "She told me about it. I think it scared
her at first, but now it's like they're old friends. She's
named him Jacob." Hal shook his head.

Jimmy smiled and nodded, trying not to chuckle. "You said she's
forgotten some other things?"

"Yeah," Hal answered. "We had lunch that day. Ran into some
friends from our home town. But she doesn't remember any of
that. She thinks she spent the whole afternoon shopping. But
didn't come home with any bags."

"I see." Jimmy took notes as he talked, trying to think of
relevant questions to ask, pondering possible explanations. Was
the face a real person? Perhaps if it was, that person likely
knew something that would help them understand what had really
happened. "Mr. Hubert, would you mind taking your wife down to
the police station? I have an idea."

"Sure, what is it?"

"I'd like Imogene to describe the face in her dream to a sketch
artist down at the police station." Jimmy scribbled down a name
on a scrap of paper and handed to Hal. "Detective Henderson can
hook you up with him." Jimmy stood up to leave, satisfied with
the information he'd received.

Hal and Imogene stood as well, Hal extending his hand. "Sure, no
problem."

"Today if possible," Jimmy added, shaking Hal's hand.

***

*She knows*, Lex realized as he eyed the object in his hand.

Lex had suspected something was amiss this morning, when she had
commented about her friends not being at the wedding. That memory
had been altered. At first, he thought maybe she was just tired
because of her condition.

And then he stumbled across this notebook. One of Lois's.
Stuffed under the couch.

He'd been thinking about her earlier comment for much of the day
and had sat down to polish his knife collection as he usually did
when he needed time to focus and center himself. If he hadn't
dropped the lid to the cleaner only to have it roll under the
couch, he never would have found it. But when he reached his
fingers under the edge, they brushed across something unexpected
instead.

A notebook.

Small, with a leather cover. One of the ones he'd given her
several weeks ago just because he loved her and enjoyed giving
her gifts.

He'd pulled it out and flipped through the pages. It looked like
notes for a story at first, but as he flipped further, the
writing looked more hurried, frantic even. Columns of notes
scribbled in haste.

He paused on one page as a single, elegantly written word leaped
from the paper.

*Clark*.

The blood drained from his head, leaving him woozy. As he looked
more closely at the words on the page, reading bits and pieces,
he realized that there was no mistaking what was going on.

Somehow, she knew.

She remembered.

As he flipped through the notebook more slowly, he saw a jumble
of the events and descriptions he'd given her mixed with the
real memories he'd covered up. Snippets, it appeared. Pieces.
She hadn't remembered everything, it seemed... or she hadn't
had a chance to write it all down. From the looks of it, she was
trying to sort out what was real from the rest of it.

Lex closed his eyes and mentally ran through the last several
days, searching for some evidence of when this had happened. Then
he would be able to consider how it had happened.

Hightower had insisted that the process was irreversible. That it
wouldn't wear off with time. That it worked. Immediate regret
filled him and quickly turned to anger.

He tried to relax, breathing deeply. He spotted the baby booties
he'd brought to her. Her reaction brought a smile to his face.
She hadn't been expecting the gesture, and he could tell by the
look on her face that it had exactly the effect on her that he
was hoping for. She was enchanted.

He had diligently spent the last two months making amends for the
way in which he'd interrupted her life. He had painstakingly
displayed his affection for Lois. She and all the world could see
just how much he truly loved her. How he would do whatever was
necessary for her happiness. He knew what was best for her and
would take care of her.

Lois.

He couldn't lose *his* Lois. His heart ached at the thought of
losing her... and their unborn child.

Suddenly, it hit him. That must be it. The pregnancy must have
done something, changed something. Hormones were notorious for
wreaking havoc in all sorts of ways in pregnant women. And they
probably hadn't tested that aspect. Questions bombarded him. Had
it been the pregnancy? Did Hightower make a mistake or lie? Would
it be safe to alter her memories again? If it weren't safe,
could he endure several months of her hatred before having the
opportunity to repeat the procedure?

Lex shook his head, his face turning stern. She couldn't hate
him. Could she? She'd so easily stepped into her role as his
wife, and he *knew* those affections couldn't be faked. Maybe it
wouldn't be so bad, even if she did remember everything. Maybe
she would come to realize that she preferred him over Clark.

He should have killed Clark when he had the chance.

Yet knowing he was so miserable gave Lex such great satisfaction.
Lex had carefully crafted a miserable existence for the deceiving
alien. He had nothing but years of memories of being forced to
leave his job for something that never happened, countless
failures, and disappointing his friends and family, which led to
his new low self-esteem as well as a fear of intimacy. And he'd
made sure to leave just enough of the shell of the old Clark to
make sure he wouldn't give up on life altogether.

According to his last report, the Lang girl had just left him. A
smile spread across his face at the thought. He wondered just
what had happened to bring about that added despair.

Lex shook his head. He couldn't think about that now. He needed
first to get Lois somewhere secluded, protected. He knew just the
place.

And then he would have Hightower make sure the procedure
wouldn't hurt his future heir. That was the last thing he
wanted.

***

Chapter 14

A few hours later, they relaxed on the plush chaise sectional
sofa, watching the news after dinner as they always did. But this
time Lex noticed the subtle differences. She was making an effort
to mask it, but she sat just the slightest bit further away and
did not lean in his direction as much as she used to. When he
reached for her hand, she seemed startled but allowed him to take
it.

How long had she known?

How long had she known she was pregnant?

He gently squeezed her hand and could sense the faintest turmoil
within her. It troubled him to know she was distressed and trying
to hide it. In her condition, he knew it could be dangerous. It
was imperative, for her safety and that of their unborn child,
that something be done as quickly as possible. But he would first
have to discuss it with Hightower to determine what would be the
best course of action.

As they reclined next to each other, he considered what could
immediately be done and made a decision. He leaned closer to her
shoulder and ignored the subtle shift she made. "Lois, my
dear," Lex cooed into her ear, "I've decided we should take a
little vacation."

"A vacation?" Lois said distractedly. She kept her eyes on the
television, but he wondered if her attention was really so
focused on the news. Or was she only pretending?

"Yes," he said as he laced his fingers through hers. She
didn't pull away, and he pulled her hand into his lap. As he
began stroking her fingers, he heard her breath catch, and it
made him smile. "Since we have some time off, I thought we could
celebrate our happy news with a little get-away to that chateau
of mine upstate." The increase in her breathing was only barely
noticeable. "It has a sort of gothic feel to it. Very
romantic," he said as he brought her fingers to his lips. "I
know you'll love it."

She turned to him then with a smile that didn't quite reach her
eyes. "Have we been there before? I don't remember it."

"No, darling. I only just acquired it last month. But I thought
it would be the perfect place for us to relax." Lex suggestively
inched his body closer to hers. "And... enjoy each other's
company."

After adjusting her own position, she leaned her head on his
shoulder and said, "I don't know, now might not be the best
time."

"But Lois, darling, later you'll be too far along to be
comfortable traveling long distances," he pointed out. "Now is
the most suitable time."

She sighed, and he wondered what hidden meaning it carried. "Oh,
Lex, I just don't feel up to it."

"Won't you reconsider?" he tried to appeal. "It will be very
relaxing."

Her head rolled from side to side on his shoulder. "I don't
know..."

He guessed the reason for her reluctance to say yes: she was
aware. What could he say to help her feel more comfortable with
the idea, to be willing to go? He gathered that she was nervous
to spend time with him and assumed she would come up with some
excuse to not share a bed with him tonight. Perhaps the promise
of some time alone would do the trick.

"I was hoping we could go in the morning, but I have an
appointment just before lunch. I was hoping that you might be
willing to head there yourself. I've arranged for Scott to drive
you."

***

*Scott*. She closed her eyes to restrain her excitement at
hearing this. She hadn't been sure when she would see him again.
This would be the perfect opportunity to ask him questions and
work out what to do next. Suddenly, the idea wasn't so bad.

"Well," she began, trying not to sound too eager. "Is it far?
I don't think I could be in a car for too long. Driving home
last night was miserable." It was true enough.

"It's only a couple of hours. And you could stop along the way
if you needed a break." He squeezed her hand again, his need for
contact surprising her after having remembered whom he really
was. "The countryside is beautiful."

"When would you get there?" she asked.

"Later that afternoon. I hope to be there in time to watch the
sunset with you over the river." He turned to kiss the top of
her head. "I thought I would have Scott take you there just
after breakfast. However, since I am certain you will miss me,"
he said with laughter in his voice, "I was going to have them
prepare your favorite dessert -- Double Fudge Crunch Bars. They
will be there waiting."

She smiled and chuckled at his thoughtfulness and then felt the
familiar nausea flaring up. She swallowed to suppress it before
answering, "That sounds... perfect," she said with as genuine a
smile as she could manage.

Lex shifted then, and as she lifted her head from his shoulder,
she turned to see some unreadable expression flit across his face
before it was replaced with the affection she had grown
accustomed to, however outlandish it seemed now.

"Perfect." His eyes smiled at her as he slowly leaned closer,
making his intentions clear when he glanced at her lips.

As if on cue, the nausea overwhelmed her once more, and she made
a mad dash to the bathroom. It was certainly bothersome but made
it exceedingly easy to convince Lex she was pregnant. So long as
he didn't notice that it only seemed to happen when he tried to
be intimate with her.

Lex followed her, ever the completely contradictory sympathetic
husband, rubbed small circles all over her back, offered her a
washcloth at the right time, and spoke soft assurances to her. It
was awkward to have him here. She was embarrassed to have an
audience for the unpleasant event, but she allowed it for fear
that he would see through her deception.

A thought struck her as he pulled her hair from her face: where
would she sleep tonight? He would expect her to be fine with
sleeping in their bed. But the thought of being there, next to
him, with the potential for anything to happen had her stomach
heaving anew. If only she could come up with a reason to need to
sleep somewhere else.

"Lois, darling," Lex began. "After the last twenty-four hours
or so, it appears you have all-the-time sickness instead of
morning sickness."

She laughed at his reference between her heaving.

"I don't think you've slept well lately," he continued,
rubbing her back again. "I'm worried about you... and the
baby."

She could feel his sincerity in the way he tenderly touched her
and hear the smile in his voice at the mention of this
nonexistent baby. It made her cringe. "I'll be okay," she
insisted, though her body tried to prove otherwise.

"I know," he cooed.

When she sat back, finally sure that there was nothing left to
expel, Lex handed her a fresh washcloth and stood. He reached for
her hands, and she was thankful for the help. Standing at the
sink, her body shivered despite her efforts to stop it. She was
exhausted. Once she finished brushing her teeth, Lex surprised
her by scooping her up in his arms and carrying her from the
bathroom. She tensed, unsure of his intentions.

"I think it would be best if I allowed you to sleep undisturbed
tonight," he explained stepping just across the hall to the
guest bedroom. "There will be fewer steps for you to take should
you need to return."

She breathed a sigh of relief as he lay her on the bed and helped
her under the covers as if he were tucking a child into bed. His
thoughtfulness astounded her, and she was grateful.

"Thank you," she said as she reached to squeeze his hand.
"I'm sorry."

"Nonsense." He leaned closer and caressed her cheek with his
hand. "Sleep well, my darling," he said before gently pressing
his lips to hers.

She smiled weakly as he left the room and, as soon as the door
closed behind him, dropped her head back with an exasperated
sigh.

This. This pretending. This conflict of emotions. All of this was
hard.

***

Clark lay sprawled face down on the bed, feet and hands dangling
over the edges, contemplating the misery that was his existence.
If he were going to be completely honest with himself, everything
that had happened was a direct result of his own deficiencies.

He was gullible, believing things that would have been obviously
false to anyone else. He was stubborn, failing to listen to
reason when the accuracy of his information was brought into
question. He was thoughtless to his core to be able to hurt
someone unconsciously. He was an irresponsible, unreliable
reporter who could be outdone by a middle school student. He was
careless and inattentive, destroying things around him.

And to top it all off, this afternoon his ineptness led him to
the wrong house when he tried to find Lana. He must have written
the address down incorrectly. He couldn't even do *that* right.

The snickers and raised eyebrows of the numerous people in that
house, gathered for some kind of party he wasn't invited to,
still grated on his nerves in his mind.

Can he do anything right?

Nope.

He couldn't even fall asleep to end this disastrous day. He
began counting... all the ways he was a failure... one... two...
three... four...

***

Chapter 15

January 22, 1996

The rings she wore to signify her marriage to Lex flashed in the
sunlight as Lois turned them over in her hands. After getting in
the car with Scott, she took them off and now sat with her head
on the headrest as she watched the scenery go by, unseeing. Her
thoughts were a jumble of contradictions.

Angry that Lex had done... something to her.

Moved by what appeared to be his genuine affection for her.

Charmed by his unwavering adoration and considerate behavior,
especially when she kept running from him every time he tried to
be intimate.

Ashamed that she couldn't shake her affections for him, though
she now knew most of those memories were lies.

Distressed by the memories with Lex that were real.

Angry at herself for letting Clark down.

Desperate to know what happened to Clark.

Terrified of the possibilities.

Determined to get out of this and put everything back to normal.

Not *normal*.

Things could never go back to *normal*...

Lois closed her eyes to the scenery and her thoughts. A tear
slipped down her cheek, and she took a slow deep breath. Spending
time thinking like this was not productive. It would only hinder
her ability to think clearly and work toward her goal. She needed
to focus instead and remember that she and Clark had overcome
everything they'd been through. Surely this would be no
different. She had to believe that.

"I hope you don't mind," Scott interrupted her introspection,
"I called ahead to the chateau and let them know we would be
late. Since you are so *sick* with this *pregnancy*, we'll have
to make additional stops and won't arrive at the time Lex told
them yesterday."

Not much had been said since she got into the car with Scott, as
she just sat and thought. Now, she laughed at the reference to
her *condition* but was pleased that it would give them an excuse
to take it slow. "Scott, I'm not really pregnant," she
corrected.

"I know," he said, releasing a small laugh, "But this will
give us time to make it to Clark before Lex figures out we're
gone."

Lois quickly turned to face him, shifting her body. "You know
where he is?" she asked.

"Our flight leaves in just under an hour from Metropolis
International Airport."

"Oh Scott," she exclaimed. "Where is he?"

"Columbia, Missouri," Scott informed her. "We sent him back to
Kansas, but his dad sent him to Columbia. He's working for the
paper there."

"*We*?" Lois picked up on the word. Had she heard him
correctly? He had something to do with all of this?

She could see the self-reproach in his features as he weighed how
he would answer the question. "Yeah," he finally said, guilt
coloring his response.

"You... had a hand in this?" she asked, confused.

"Yeah," he repeated with the same sad tone of voice, knuckles
whitening as he gripped the steering wheel tightly. "And while I
don't expect you to believe me, I have never regretted anything
more." He glanced at the treble clef on his wrist before he
turned and looked at her, eyes beseeching. "You can trust me.
I'm on your side now, and I will help until everything is--"

"What happened?" she interrupted, needing answers to an
overflow of questions.

He sighed. "In short, Lex Luthor paid me and some other guys
to... incapacitate Superman..." He paused and looked at her
before he continued, "Clark... change his and your memories and
then do whatever else we needed to make it work."

She barely heard the admission of his knowledge of Clark's
secret after the word *incapacitate* knocked the breath from her.
Her mouth hung open, and she took short, quick breaths.

"I don't really know why." She heard him pause and saw him
look at her, but her mind was stuck. "I know now that Lex Luthor
is the worst kind of monster. I'm sorry I didn't see it
sooner."

*Incapacitate*. The word hung in the air, thick with dread until
she remembered Scott's words at the party. *He is alive and...
well*. She grasped that bit of information and held it close.
Swallowing, she looked away. Agonizing over what had happened
would not solve anything. Forcing herself to focus on the
immediate situation, she responded, "I know he's a monster. But
everything is... mixed up in my head. It's like I can't shake
the stuff that I know is wrong." She leaned her head back on the
headrest, turning to look out the window. "It's...
overwhelming, exhausting"

"That should wear off over time. Eventually, you'll remember
everything that was real, but I don't know how long that will
take. And the fake stuff... I don't know if it will go away."

"When did it happen?" she asked.

"About two months ago."

"When Superman left..." she thought out loud. "How many people
know... the secret?"

"Seven," he answered.

She took a deep breath, closing her eyes. They'd worked so hard
to keep this secret. And now five criminals could do anything
they wanted with that information. Thankfully, it seemed one of
them had seen the error of his ways.

"Lex, of course, me, and three others that were working on
this," he continued. "I worked with Hightower. Did whatever he
told me to. Then, as your cameraman, I was your... guard."

"*Doctor* Hightower?" she asked as she knit her brows. "He's
not really a doctor, is he?"

"He is, actually." Scott nodded and explained, "He built the
device that did all this memory changing. Someone named Anna
Seville was in charge of changing records. Dr. Florence
Montgomery took care of Superman, and his lackeys, Travis and
Carl--"

"Carl?!" Lois shouldn't be surprised. Yes, Carl was very
thoughtful and relatable, and all her interactions with him over
the last two months seemed so genuine that she thought of him as
a friend. But his right-hand man, Nigel St. John, and his
personal assistant, Mrs. Cox, had their fingers in every bit of
Lex's plans. She rolled her eyes. "How'd you know how to...
get me to remember? It was the song, right?"

Scott shrugged as if it were some small thing he'd done. Nodding
again, he explained further, "I heard Hightower talking one day
about a key to the machine. Some great joke he had. Once I
decided to stop this, I thought about that key. The rest was a
lot of guessing... and being wrong."

"You didn't know which song." Thinking back over the past
couple weeks, there were many occasions where Scott would start
singing with no prompt like he had these songs stuck in his head.
He never sang them very loud, and now she realized that he had
studied her after the first few lines before continuing. The
singing started just after his sister, Samantha, died. She
thought it was related to his grieving, but apparently, it was
not.

"Here we are at the airport," he interrupted her train of
thought. "We're flying as usual, reporter and cameraman."

"We're flying under our *real* names?" She couldn't keep the
shock from her voice. It was over. Lex would find them in a
heartbeat.

"I know it's not ideal." Scott shrugged. "But I don't have
that kind of money and flying on the company dollar was the only
way I saw it being possible. I bought us some time letting them
know we'd be late. We'll just have to work fast once we get
there."

She sighed. This was going to be tough. Would they have enough
time? How long would it take Lex to realize his wife and her
cameraman hadn't shown up where they were supposed to?

Almost everyone knew them as Lois Lane, reporter for LNN, and
Scott Ferguson, her trusted cameraman. How had that not felt
awkward for him for the past two months? Or had it?

"Thank you," she said, realizing that it didn't matter what
role Scott had played. He was serious about making it all
better.

"No problem," he said, brushing off her gratitude. Did he feel
like he owed her?

They pulled up to the departing flights terminal and parked.

"One more question, Scott?" she asked, reaching to stop him
before he got out of the car.

"Yeah?" He sat back just enough to turn and look at her.

"Am I actually married to Lex?" she asked, frowning, not sure
what she wanted the answer to this question to be.

"Um... Yeah... As far as I know."

***

Lex sat in his office, leaning back in the chair at his desk with
his eyes closed. 48 hours ago, preparations were underway for his
second wedding anniversary with his beautiful wife. 36 hours ago,
the celebration was just beginning. 34 hours ago, he was worried
about her sudden illness. 24 hours ago, he received the best news
of his life. 18 hours ago, he realized things were not as good as
they seemed. And one hour ago, he watched her leave, on her way
to a place where she would be safe. Now, he was determined to
take back control of the situation and waited impatiently to
speak with the only person who could offer some assurance that
all was not lost.

*His* Lois.

He'd seen what the morning sickness, however briefly it had been
occurring, was doing to her. He had surprised himself by
suggesting she sleep in the guest room. But her usual glow,
though still brightened by pregnancy, was slightly dimmed by the
dark circles under her eyes. And he wasn't sure how much she was
able to keep down yesterday. The fatigue had gotten the better of
her last evening, and he knew she needed rest in her condition.

A knock at the door brought him back from his woolgathering. He
called for whomever it was to come in and was pleased to see Dr.
Hightower follow Carl into the room.

"You wanted to see me, Mr. Luthor?" Hightower asked.

"Yes," Lex began, using his hand to indicate that Hightower
take a seat and simultaneously nodding to give Carl permission to
leave. Once they were both seated, Lex leaned forward, tenting
his fingers and frowning at Hightower. "Tell me, Hightower,"
Lex started, leaning back in his seat. "You did test your
machine on pregnant women. Am I right?"

"Yes sir," he replied with a nod.

"Was there ever any danger to the fetus?" Lex certainly had
other questions that he wanted to ask the doctor, but this
trumped them all. He couldn't put the baby at risk, even if it
meant a tense time with Lois as a captive. He would cope, though,
if necessary, but hoped for a different outcome.

"No sir." Hightower's serious look and continued eye contact
spoke well for him, easing some of Lex's worries. "We were
affecting memories directly through contact with the brain or
through sight. While infants do have short term memories, at that
young age they aren't kept. Our devices don't connect with the
fetus, however, under any circumstances."

Relief filled him as he released the breath he'd been holding.
He relaxed, comforted by the fact that he should be able to
proceed as he had hoped.

"Lois is pregnant," he stated, smiling to himself.

"Congratulations, sir." Hightower nodded.

"Thank you." Lex carefully worded his next question. "Could
the hormones associated with pregnancy affect the permanence of
the procedure?"

"No sir," Hightower responded with a frown. "The changes that
we made to the brain are independent of hormones."

The furrowed brow gave Lex pause. Was something amiss? He would
not put up with this behavior. He slowly rose from his chair,
walked around to the front of the desk, and leaned against it,
facing Hightower.

"You're certain?" Lex asked with a raised eyebrow, looking for
any signs of duplicity.

"Yes," he said confidently. Though his brow was still furrowed,
Hightower appeared unconcerned by this, sure of himself, and sure
of his work.

"I fear Lois has remembered a few things." Lex continued to
watch him carefully. He was sure the slightest glimpse of doubt
crossed Hightower's face before the doctor schooled his
features.

"That's impossible," he said, his eyes darting away and then
back quickly. While he appeared to have the same confidence now,
he was a fool to be arrogant on the outside. Lex's patience and
respect for the man waned.

"That is where you are wrong," Lex pointed out as he stood and
walked to the window. "Yesterday afternoon, I read a notebook
that I found at home. My dear investigative reporter is emerging
and is attempting to make sense of it. The notebook had accounts
of several events that were altered. Both real and fake, side by
side." He took a deep breath as he turned, staring directly at
Hightower. "You will tell me how this is possible."

"I have no idea." There was that fear again in Hightower's
eyes, briefly still. He *was* hiding something. "We tested
extensively." Lex could tell Hightower was trying to sound sure
and convinced. But it was the small things that Lex paid
attention to, allowing him to see through the facade.

"I see." Lex relaxed a bit, allowing his businessman persona to
take over. Hightower would feel his wrath in time. Until then, he
would need Hightower once more. "I'll need you to repeat the
procedure."

"Certainly, sir," Hightower agreed. A little too quickly.

"I want you to bring whatever you need to this address tomorrow
morning," he instructed as he quickly scribbled the address.

Tomorrow morning couldn't come soon enough.

***

"Lana!" a familiar voice called to her. She turned to see Clark
jogging toward her. "Wait up!"

Of course, he would find her here. He knew her schedule. She
silently berated herself for being so predictable as she leaned
closer to her friend. "I'm sorry, I should talk to him," she
told her as she adjusted the shoulder strap of her bag. "I'll
meet you in the library." Her friend looked in Clark's
direction before nodding and walking away.

Lana stood there, hugging her many folders and books to her
chest, as Clark closed in. "Hey Clark," she said, feeling shy
as he stopped in front of her.

"Can we talk?" he asked as he shoved his hands into his
pockets. "For a bit?" he added, turning his sweet puppy dog
eyes on her.

She could never stay mad at him, especially when he always seemed
so remorseful. But it had never taken him this long to come
around. "Sure," she replied, knowing what they needed to talk
about, but hoping he would bring up something else. But as Clark
shifted his weight from one foot to the next, she knew it would
not be an easy conversation.

"Lana," he started, looking down at his toes. "I... I need you
to tell me what you heard me say in my sleep." He looked up at
her face then, silently imploring her to agree.

But, instead, her anger flared, and she aimed it directly at him
"Clark, I--" she started forcefully.

"Please," he interrupted, his pleading tone quickly subduing
her. "I've been trying to remember, and all I can come up with
is how I ruined her life and she hates me. I want to fix things
between us, but I don't know what you heard me say, and I can't
imagine how anything I have said about her would ever be anything
but negative." He paused then and turned his pleading eyes to
her once more before adding, "I *need* your help."

She sighed. The mix of emotions was almost too much. How was she
going to respond to that? He was supposed to figure this out on
his own and come back to her with an apology. This request would
require her to live it all over again. His pleading eyes tore at
her resolve. She turned her head to the side and looked off into
the distance. "I don't know if I can have this conversation,"
she said honestly.

"Remember that dream I had in high school that I was mad at
*you* for?" Clark asked. He gestured for her to walk with him
down the sidewalk away from the library and then put his hands
out toward her to carry her things for her.

"What dream?" she asked, allowing him to lighten her load and
falling into step beside him.

"The one where you were kissing some guy," he explained, "and
thought it was perfectly reasonable."

"Oh, yeah." She rolled her eyes at the memory. "That wasn't
fair. It was a dream. It never even happened."

"Well, this is kind of like that," Clark pointed out. "I was
dreaming, and it never happened, yet you're mad at me for it. I
don't think it's fair that you're mad at me for something I
said when I was asleep." He paused, but she didn't look at him.
"Especially without telling me what I said..." he added.

He was right. But she wasn't ready to admit it... yet. They
walked in silence for a moment. She remembered that *situation*
well. He was so mad at her, and she had no idea why. She'd had
to plead with him to even talk to her about it. When he'd
finally told her why he was mad, it took more convincing for him
to believe her than she had expected.

She sighed and shook her head. He deserved an explanation, and
then he could convince her this time around.

"It was weird," she began, her steps slowing slightly. "The
first time I heard you talking, you seemed to be trying to tell
her something. But your alarm clock went off. You kept talking
like it was the phone, and she needed to answer it." She ducked
her head, feeling the embarrassment of the mistake she made. "I
thought you were talking to me."

"Did I ever tell her that something?" he asked.

They neared the end of the sidewalk, and she allowed him to lead
her to the right, toward the courtyard at the center of campus.

"No," she admitted. "Not even later."

"What do you mean 'later'?" he questioned. "It happened
again?"

"Yeah," she answered simply, unwilling to admit that she had
often wondered what secret he had to share. Sometimes she'd even
stayed close to listen in on the conversation, but not after she
realized he wasn't talking to her.

"What else?" he prompted, catching her attention with his hand
gesturing for more.

She closed her eyes and swallowed. Was this how Clark had felt
while telling her about his dream all those years ago? "The next
night you were trying to tell her something again but got
interrupted by another ringing telephone that you just had to
answer."

He gave a small laugh "Alarm clock?"

She laughed in response, glancing at him to see a little of the
tension leave his face. "No. But, you did answer it. You said
something about telling the world but then seemed really upset
saying, 'let them go'."

"Hmmm... But I didn't say who to let go, or who I was talking
to?" She gave a small shake of her head. And turned her face
downward. "Keep going," he encouraged. "This isn't as bad as
you thought it would be, right?"

*Is it*? she thought to herself. It certainly felt awkward to
her. And they hadn't yet reached the worst of it. But they would
have to keep going.

The sidewalk led them to a fountain in the middle of the long
courtyard surrounded by various buildings. Lana sat down on the
edge of the fountain. Clark stood a few feet from her, looking
into the pool behind her, the sunlight bouncing from its surface
and reflecting on his face. She was saddened by the stress and
worry written there.

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly before continuing.
"The night after that, you were telling her that your parents
were kidnapped. I guessed she wanted to help you find them
because you thanked her."

"Thanked her?" Clark said, surprised. "That's definitely
*not* the Lois I remember. She might have been the one to kidnap
them..." The last part he said under his breath, but she heard
it. He stepped to her side and sat down beside her, setting her
things on the edge of the fountain.

She saw him glance at her hands and moved them to her pockets to
prevent him from taking them. She wouldn't be able to cope with
the conflicting feelings.

"The next night you seemed to think something bad was going to
happen to her and were telling her to get away as far as she
could." She paused and looked down the long sidewalk in front of
them. "I guess the bad thing happened because the night after
that you were yelling for her, telling her to live, fight...
breathe." She looked toward her shoes and crossed her feet.
"'Don't you die on me, Lois,' you said."

She glanced at him then, at the incredulous look on his face. Was
it really so unbelievable? "Did she die?" he asked
tentatively.

"No," Lana sighed and slumped her shoulders, preparing for the
next part of the story. "She didn't die. But you were talking
to her about how you almost lost her, and it made you think about
how ashamed you were."

Clark snapped his fingers and pointed at her. "That's the Lois
I remember," he said. "The one who could make anyone feel like
the worst possible--"

"No," she interrupted forcefully, fisting her hands and turning
to look at him with disdain. "You were ashamed because you
hadn't told her that you *love* her."

"What??" Clark was taken aback as she allowed the hurt to show.
"Lana, you know this was just a dream, right?"

Fuming, she did her best to ignore his question. He needed to
know what hearing this had done to her to understand why she was
so upset. Looking back at the ground, she kept going with the
retelling of the story. "You said something like... you were
ashamed because you kept pushing her away even when you said you
wouldn't, and she couldn't have died before she knew why."

"Why I pushed her away?" Clark asked. "Or why she could have
died?"

"How should I know?" she spat at him and rolled her eyes.

Clark clearly regretted asking that question and sat back
silently.

"You said," she pressed on, pausing to take a breath, "'If
you died without ever knowing why, I'd never be able to forgive
myself... because I *love* you.'" She let out a deep breath in
an attempt to control her emotions and stood up, pacing back and
forth in front of Clark who remained seated on the edge of the
fountain.

Now it was his turn.

"Lana?" His brow furrowed, concern filling his voice and
relieving some of her anger. "It was just a dream." He reached
for her hand as she passed and pulled her to a stop, exactly the
way she was hoping he would. She didn't meet his eyes, but
instead looked upward. "Why is this so upsetting to you?" he
asked in his deep, caring voice.

"It wasn't just once." She tried to pull away from him but was
comforted when he didn't let her hand go. "This was like five
dreams, and it happened again and again." She felt the tears
gathering in the corner of her eyes and looked away.

"How many times?"

"I don't know... Three?"

***

*Three? *Why hadn't she said this before? He saw a single tear
streak down her face as she tugged her hand free and went back to
pacing.

"Was it the same every time?" he asked as he stood up.

"No," she said in a slightly higher pitch, indicating her
frustration. She swung her right arm out as she began, "The
first time I heard it, it wasn't bad. I actually thought you
were dreaming about me. But the second time through, you said
*Lois* a bunch of times. That made me a little angry, but..."
She stopped pacing and let her arm drop by her side. "The last
time, you said *Lois* almost every time you talked so it was
*very clear* you were talking to her." Lana paused and wiped her
arm across her face. "You sounded so... sincere." She opened
her mouth to continue but no sound came out.

He could see the anguish in her eyes and desperately wanted to
fix it. "What?" Clark prompted. "What is it?" Holding her
eyes with his, he waited for her to go on.

She closed her eyes before she started again. "When you found me
in the kitchen the other night, you'd just asked her to marry
you... again," she said, crossing her arms.

"*Marry me??*" Clark croaked out. He tried not to laugh at the
absurdity of it. "This is just so... unbelievable!"

Lana didn't say anything but instead quickly wiped at her eyes
again. Clark wasn't surprised at that -- it made sense now why
she was so upset. He stepped closer to her, and when she didn't
seem to be offended by that, he reached out and put his hands at
her waist. She relaxed a bit at his touch and rested her head on
his chin. He knew she needed him to convince her everything was
going to be alright.

"Lana, I ..." he started, not sure what to say. "I'm sorry. I
see why you were... *are* so upset by this. I wish I could go
back and change it." He pressed his lips to her forehead.
"Thank you... for telling me all this. I know it was hard. But
it *was* just a dream."

Lana let out a choked laugh. "I guess it's not fair to be upset
with you for a dream you didn't even know you had."

Clark chuckled. "And I guarantee that is not *at all* like the
interactions I actually had with her."

Lana finally reached her arms around him, and Clark felt like
things were finally going back to normal. "Yeah," she said, "I
just... was worried."

"I know and I'm sorry," Clark apologized again, leaning his
head down. "You don't need to worry about it anymore."

Movement to his right caught his attention. Lana said something,
but Clark didn't hear it. He was looking over her shoulder into
a face that froze him in place and filled him with guilt and
humiliation. *Lois?*

"Clark?" he heard Lana say.

He felt her head turn to see where he had been looking, but he
quickly distracted her. "We have to go." Clark hastily picked
up Lana's things, grabbed her hand, and started walking in the
opposite direction of the face he had seen. He had to get away,
to hide. The campus was not very crowded at this time of the
morning, but enough people would be in the library to blend in
with.

"What's the matter?"

"Uh... nothing," he stammered as he led her up the steps to the
library doors. "I don't want you to miss any more of your study
session." It was at least partially true.

As they walked through the library, he did his best to convince
himself that the face outside did *not* belong to Lois. Surely,
it was just a result of the conversation they were having. He
walked her to the room where her study group was working on a
large project, which was spread over a large table, and set her
things in a chair in the corner.

Aside from the unfortunate end to their conversation, he was
pleased with how things had turned out. "Come stay with me
tonight," he whispered as he reached for her other hand, intent
on proving that his affections lay with her.

She looked up at him and smiled. "Okay."

He smiled back at her, gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, and
squeezed her hand before he left.

As he came to the doors leading out of the library, he scanned
the faces of the passersby, looking for the one that could induce
incredible amounts of remorse and fearing he would see it. Once
he was sure she wasn't near, he left and quickly made his way
back to the paper, where he hoped this shadow couldn't follow
him.

***

Chapter 16

"I don't understand," she said, shaking her head. "Why would
he run from me like that? It was like he thought *I* was the bad
guy." Lois was pacing in the small space of the hotel room she
would stay in that night. Scott's room was attached to Lois's
by a door separating the two. Now, Scott sat on Lois's bed,
watching her as she struggled to understand what had happened and
ranted about what didn't make sense.

"Remember, Lex put some pretty rotten things in Clark's mind,"
he answered. "I don't know all of what he put there, but he
wanted Clark to be miserable. *Miserable*. Don't give up,
though."

Lois stopped to look out the window. There wasn't much to see,
just the thick tree line that the hotel butted up against. She
knew the highway was on the other side, just as loud as it could
be. At least the evergreen trees were nice to look at. Not that
she was in a position to enjoy it.

She hung her head. "It hurts," she whispered, "to see him like
this." She only saw him for a moment, but Clark's jarred
expression was already etched in her mind. The look in his eyes
was one of disbelief and panic, haunting her. She saw it again
every time she closed her eyes. What had Lex done to him to make
him afraid of her?

"Were you able to sing any of the songs I gave you?" Scott
asked.

"No, I didn't even get that close to him." She threw her hands
up in frustration, turning to face him. "He was with a woman.
Who was she?"

"I'm not sure," he said, shaking his head.

She hadn't expected that. Of course, she hadn't really known
what to expect. If she had believed for the past two months that
she was happily married to Lex Luthor, it was possible that he
could have been with someone else as well.

She swallowed, unwilling to allow herself to think about that any
further. "As soon as he saw me, he bolted."

"Give him time," Scott said encouragingly. "We'll figure out
where he is."

How would they? Columbia was a dwarf next to Metropolis, but, as
a college town, it was filled with people this time of year. All
they knew at this point was that he worked for the local paper,
covering city government issues.

"Looks like I'll be a stalker for a while..." she said
sarcastically. She turned and leaned against the window sill.

"Don't worry," Scott said, chuckling as he stood from the bed
and made his way to his room. "It will all work out in the end.
For now, let's get some lunch."

"Sounds good, I'm starving." And she was. She hadn't been
able to eat breakfast that morning. She'd been too nervous,
knowing she would have some time to talk to Scott and worrying
that Lex would want to do more than just say goodbye. Then she
hadn't eaten much on the plane or since they arrived. "Know any
good places to eat?"

"Yeah," Scott answered from the other room. "I heard from the
guy at the front desk that Shiloh is good."

An advertisement for the restaurant lay on the table. Lois looked
it over. "A bar and grill? Sounds great. Looks like they're
right downtown, so maybe afterwards we can walk toward the paper
and see if we see Clark there."

"Sure." Scott entered her room again and leaned on the
doorway.

She looked at him standing there and, for the first time, noticed
the lines around his eyes. The question she hadn't had a chance
to ask yet popped into her head. "Scott, why are you doing
this?"

"Because I'm hungry," he answered.

"No," she said with a laugh. "You work for Lex. And you had a
hand in all this. Why are you helping me? And why now?" She
pinned him with a serious stare. After finding out that he had
been part of the plan, it didn't make sense. Something was
missing for her to understand. Had he just had some prick of
conscience?

He looked at the floor and shook his head. Seconds passed. Lois
waited as patiently as she could for him to answer. "I made a
promise," he finally said without looking up.

"A promise? To whom?"

A long heavy breath escaped him. He fiddled with the treble clef
held on his wrist by a leather strap. When he said, "My
sister," Lois finally realized where she'd seen the charm
before. It had been Samantha's. He'd started wearing it just
after she died.

"Samantha? How--" she began, brows knit, but was interrupted by
the look on Scott's face when his head came up. His eyes were
filled with grief and anger. She sat silently, waiting for him to
continue. Lois couldn't imagine how Samantha could possibly be
involved in this. She was young, sweet, and innocent.

"She made me promise just before she died that I would stop
this," Scott admitted. "She--" He stopped and let another
heavy breath out.

It was plainly written on his face that this was hard for him to
talk about. She offered him a way out. "Look, Scott, you don't
have to explain."

"No, it's okay. My... uh... therapist has been encouraging me
to talk about what happened instead of bottling everything up
inside."

Lois briefly considered making some snarky comment about
therapists but stopped herself, knowing full well that now
wasn't the time.

Scott sighed again. "Hightower. He... used my sister when we
were testing the device. She was a test subject." He sat down on
the edge of the bed, clenching his fists into tight balls. "I
was part of the test, too, in a way." Scott was clearly
frustrated and felt the need to stand back up. As he paced the
room, Lois could feel the anger radiating from him, and she
prepared herself to hear something devastating.

"He... *took advantage* of her." He kicked the edge of the
dresser and let out a growl, causing Lois to jump.

Lois felt the blood drain from her face and sat down on the bed.
This was beyond anything she was expecting. That Lex could even
authorize such depravity surprised her and, at the same time,
brought back to mind her own predicament. As the nausea crept
back up, she reached for a glass of water on the table beside the
bed.

"There was a specific test. One Luthor ordered... to test the
limits..." He trailed off, swallowed, and took a deep breath
before trying to continue again. "After he... uh ..."--Scott
cleared his throat--"he used the device on her." Scott slammed
his white knuckles into the wall. "Then he brought her home to
see if I could tell," he said as his voice cracked. He rubbed
his knuckles with his other hand.

"Oh my God," she said under her breath.

"You know she died of pancreatic cancer. We tested on cancer
patients but not late stage. I don't know if it was the
treatment or the cancer or some song playing in the hall at the
hospital or what, but she remembered. There at the end, she
became so miserable." He paused and swallowed hard. "I thought
it was just the cancer, the pain, knowing she was dying. But that
last day... she told me... all of it... And I could see she felt
relieved to tell me. I promised I would stop Hightower, stop
Lex."

"Oh, Scott," was all she could say. The times in her life when
Lois was left speechless were few and far between, but the sullen
air hovering around them and the despicable nature of what she'd
just learned stunned her.

"She knew everything," he added. "Hightower told her
everything about what we were doing and whose idea it was before
he..."

She walked over to him at that moment and placed her hand on his
shoulder to offer support. "I'm so sorry."

"Me too." He shook his head and reached for the charm on his
wrist. "I hope you can at least be sure you can trust me now."

"I didn't need this to be able to trust you." Nodding to the
charm, she asked, "Is this why you wear that?"

Scott nodded and, standing straighter, seemed to shake himself
out of the somber mood that had taken over. "She wanted me to
keep it." A sad smile spread across his face.

"She would be proud of what you've already done."

Scott paused before he nodded again and let out a deep breath.
"Let's go get some food."

***

"And here's the records I got from the doctor last week."
Alexia Mayfield handed Jimmy a file folder. He flipped through
the pages of this set of records and the paper copies from two
months ago, scanning for anything that stood out.

"And what was the procedure your brother was supposed to go in
for?"

"Asthma tests," David Mayfield, her brother, said. "I'd been
having some trouble breathing lately. After I exercise. So, I
went in, and they did all these breathing tests."

"Wait, you remember all this?" Jimmy asked with his brow
furrowed.

"Yeah, this morning. It was the weirdest thing." David shook
his head and took a sip of his drink before continuing. "So, we
were on our way home this morning, from our parents' house in
Vermont. We stopped at this diner to get some breakfast and as
soon as I walked in, I started to feel... weird, kind of like
when they put the laughing gas mask on you at the dentist, but
without thinking everything is funny."

"He looked like he might pass out," Alexia added. "I helped
him sit down and after a few minutes it was gone."

"Everything got all foggy, and I remembered something that
happened the morning of the tests and then the asthma tests
themselves, like I was reliving it all. Then it was over."

Jimmy looked between the two with his eyebrows raised. If more of
the patients were able to remember, they might be able to piece
together something to figure out what was really going on. "Do
you have any idea what caused you to remember?"

"I don't know," David said. "Maybe the smell of the food?
I've heard smells can trigger memories."

"Have you talked to your lawyer yet?" Jimmy asked.

"It's on our list of things to do this afternoon," Alexia
said.

"I'll be interested to hear how that goes." Jimmy jotted down
a reminder to follow up with them later. "Is there anything else
you can remember about the diner? Anything at all? Sometimes
sights and sounds can trigger memories."

"It was kind of old-fashioned-country themed," said Alexia.
"They were playing a lot of Nat King Cole songs. I had a veggie
omelet, and he had waffles." She shrugged. "Not sure if any of
that helps."

"Me either, but you never know." Jimmy smiled at them both as
he rose from his seat to leave.

***

Chapter 17

Clark's focus was shot the rest of his morning at the paper.
He'd relived the moment when he'd seen her over and over until
he couldn't even be sure that it was Lois he'd seen. Just the
*idea* of her being here filled him with apprehension. He must
have imagined it. He hoped he imagined it. That must be it. He
had been so stressed about his conversation with Lana that he
*imagined* Lois. Plenty of other people in the world had dark
hair and rich eyes... and stood watching him from a distance.

Clark groaned and pushed himself back from his desk.

It was time for lunch. A walk would do him good. Food in his
stomach would help as well.

The short walk to Shiloh Bar and Grill did little to relax him,
but the aromas wafting toward him and the live music playing on
stage promised an environment that would lift his spirits if only
temporarily. He chose a seat at the bar and ordered the steak and
fries. If only they served buttermilk with it.

The band performing their own over dramatized renditions of
popular songs was mildly distracting, providing Clark with a very
small sense of accomplishment in choosing well where to eat
lunch. He couldn't stifle the laugh when the lead singer began
singing a fast and catchy song in the style of blues,
accentuating the uplifting words with a tone filled with anguish
that did not match in the least.

Focusing on the music, he was able to relax by the time his lunch
arrived. As the waitress placed his food in front of him, the
band switched to something jazzy. He thought he recognized the
song as one his parents had listened to but couldn't quite place
it. As he took a bite of food, he allowed his foot to tap in time
as the words finally came to him.

Nat King Cole.

"*You*," a voice he'd recognize anywhere began, "*stepped out
of a dream*."

His mouth suddenly went dry, making it difficult to continue
chewing. She really had stepped out of a dream.

"*You are too wonderful*," the voice continued, "*to be what
you seem*."

Reaching for his drink with one hand and napkin with the other,
he attempted to swallow before choking on his food. He thought
his heart would stop. There wasn't enough time or circumstances
that would ever pass to make him forget that voice.

"*Could there be eyes like yours?*"

He felt the blood drain from his face as he looked over his
shoulder to see her standing with the band. She was looking
straight at him. There was no mistaking it now. Lois Lane was
right there.

"*Could there be lips like yours?*"

He needed to leave. He had to get out of the suffocating
restaurant. No longer caring about his lunch, he dug into his
pocket and pulled out his wallet, fished for the cash as quickly
as his fingers would let him, which was not fast enough, and
threw the cash on the counter.

"*Could there be smiles like yours*," she sang. "*honest and
truly?*"

Making his way to the door to leave, he chanced another glance in
her direction.

"*You*," she sang again, looking straight at him, "*stepped
out of a cloud*."

It was a mistake to look at her. A smile on her lips and a
question in her eyes, she had her sights trained on him while she
moved with the music. It sent chills through him, and he turned
to make his getaway.

Once out of the building, he took a few breaths before deciding
which way he would go. Applause drifted to his ears and when it
suddenly increased in volume, he glanced over his shoulder to see
Lois coming out of the restaurant. Before she could spot him, he
took off running and ducked around the corner of the building
directly behind the restaurant.

*Lois*.

It *had* been her that he saw. What was she doing *here*?

As much as he wanted to know the answers to those questions, the
need to get away from her was far more powerful. He couldn't get
away fast enough.

***

Clark was fast. Once outside the restaurant, she knew there would
be no sign of him. Lois had no way of knowing which way he'd
gone, but at least this time she wasn't surprised to see him
flee as fast as possible.

That must not have been the right song.

Scott came out of the restaurant as she was searching for a sign
of Clark and stopped beside her.

"He's gone," she said in disbelief. "I thought you said his
powers were disabled?"

"They were...are." Scott looked around. "He's probably just
hiding somewhere. Come on, we'll walk toward the paper."

The unusually warm, for January at least, weather made the trek
through town more enjoyable. With so many out taking advantage of
the almost comfortable temperatures, Lois was kept busy scanning
the faces for Clark but did not see him.

He was not at the paper when they arrived either. Once they knew
he covered local government issues, they headed toward a place
where Clark might be found covering some happenings. County
offices were in buildings just a few blocks away with municipal
offices a block to the right. A small park, not unlike the one in
front of Metropolis's court house, surrounded the lone columns
of the original courthouse and was at the center of these
government buildings.

The park featured an amphitheater where a band, if a saxophonist
and a drummer could be called a band, was playing with a
microphone for the sax connected to one large speaker. Lois and
Scott meandered on the pathways, listening to the music as the
musicians collected tips until Lois spotted Clark walking from
the street corner toward the courthouse.

"Looks like he's coming this way," Scott said. He motioned his
head toward the band and raised his eyebrows at Lois.

She nodded, sidled up next to the saxophone player, and then
stole the mic.

"Hey! Don't--" the saxophone player started. Lois aimed a
pleading look in his direction and held the mic up to her mouth.

At the saxophonist's questioning look, she took a chance.
"*What a day this has been*," she sang a cappella, looking
around. She'd lost track of Clark and scanned the area for any
sign of him as she sung a little bit more. "*What a rare mood
I'm in*."

She turned to see a smile spread across the saxophonist's face
as he recognized the song and began playing with her. She smiled
back at him and continued singing. "*Why, it's almost like
bein' in love*." The drummer picked up the beat, and the three
continued the impromptu song.

"*There's a smile on my face, for the whole human race. Why,
it's almost like bein' in love*."

Lois looked up just in time to see Clark standing motionless a
good fifty yards away from her in front of the courthouse, frozen
mid step. His head was still lowered but she could see his eyes
looking directly at her, his face expressionless. She nodded in
his direction as she continued the song. And when he didn't
immediately make a run for it, she waved.

But this clearly wasn't the song either. As soon as her hand
went up, he shook his head and took a step back, turning toward
the courthouse and going inside.

Her voice cracked as she continued the happy words of the song.

She ached to speak to him, to tell him what was happening and
what had happened. To place her hand on his arm. To take his fear
of her away. To kiss him.

She could have followed him then -- her press credentials would
have gotten her inside -- but she chose to let him go for a bit.
Clark wouldn't allow her closer at this moment. She would have
to wait for another chance. One in which his odds of getting away
were smaller.

***

Clark sat on a bench in a basement hallway of the courthouse,
hiding. Worried Lois would follow him in, he'd followed the
twisted maze of hallways until he wasn't sure he would be able
to find his way out. Now he waited, afraid to leave for fear of
running into her. After that third run-in with her, he was
certain she was following him. But why?

Her voice had been like honey, sweet and smooth, and it made him
want to gag the way it coated his throat. It was not enough that
he lost his job and had struggled to keep one ever since. She
felt some unconscionable need to torment him further. It
wouldn't surprise him to know she was trying to exact revenge,
though why she'd waited more than two years to do so was
anyone's guess.

He leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes,
picturing again the confusion on her face. Why had she seemed
distressed? Was his response not enough for her? Was she looking
for him to be destroyed? Was she sad that he'd run away instead
of allowing her to castigate him in front of an audience?

Three times he'd run into her today. Two of the times, she had
sung. The songs were stuck in his head and along with them, her
face. He'd tried every trick in the book to purge them from his
mind. He wondered if some pathetically desperate part of him
wanted to remember her. Wanted to pretend that she had been
singing *to him*.

He let out a harsh laugh directed at himself and shook his head.
Checking the time, he realized it was getting late. He needed to
head back to his desk at the paper to pick up a few things before
heading home for the evening to get ready for Lana to return.

*Coward*. He was a grown man allowing this fanatical woman to
control his life from afar. *No more*, he thought, rising from
his seat and winding back through the labyrinth that was the
courthouse's basement.

Taking the steps two at a time, he reached the lobby and
cautiously peered through the windows before venturing outside.
It was late in the afternoon, and the sidewalks were less
crowded. Taking a deep breath, he pushed the door open and walked
resolutely down the street to the paper.

He could do this. No need to be afraid.

He opened the front door to the paper, striding in with
determination. He hadn't made it more than two steps in before
he heard yet another song from the velvet voice he had refused to
let control him.

"*L is for the way you look at me*," she sang.

He tried not to respond in any way, focusing instead on the
second set of doors.

"*O is for the only one I see.*"

He resisted the urge to glance at her, afraid of what he would
see. But he still wondered... Was she singing to him? He shook
his head and breathed a sigh of relief as he caught the eye of
the security guard, Will, standing near that alluring second set
of doors. Giving a quick nod and look that sent the message he
intended, he continued undeterred.

"*V is very, very extra-ordinary*," she sang as he crossed
through those blessed doors.

"Excuse me, miss," he heard Will say, stopping her. "You
can't go in there."

The rest of the conversation was cut from his hearing by the
closing of the door. Clark didn't stick around to see what
happened but went straight to his desk to collect his things. He
headed out the back door and straight home to await Lana's
arrival.

He prayed Lana would be willing to listen and maybe even help. He
also prayed she wouldn't be offended when she learned who was
now following him around.

***

Lex popped the cap free from the glass bottle of imported mineral
water and carefully poured the thirst-quenching liquid into the
tumbler before adding a slice of lime. He took a sip and then
slowly swirled the refreshing fluid as he allowed himself to
relax into the seat. Peering past the droplets of rain streaking
across the window, he tried to enjoy the scenery as much as could
be expected given the weather.

The pitter-patter of rain hitting the roof of the car provided a
relaxing environment in which Lex could consider the situation
further and determine the best course of action regarding Lois
and her returning memories. He was certain she must still be
confused and would surely attempt to make sense of what she now
remembered. She must not want him to know, and he would be happy
to keep it that way. If only he understood how it had happened.
Hightower's explanation fell short of satisfying him.

After wrapping up his meeting with Hightower, he had taken care
of a few other things before beginning his own journey to the
chateau. The falling rain would stop them from being able to
enjoy the spectacular sunset over the river, but at least he
would be able to have a sense of security knowing she would be
secluded from the rest of the world.

Everything he did was because he loved her.

She may not see it, but it was true regardless.

The phone rang, drawing him out of his thoughts. He took a sip of
the drink he held and reached to answer.

"How is Lois settling in?" Lex asked the person on the other
end of the line.

His body stiffened at the response. "Excuse me?"

He sat up straighter, irritation straining his features. "Why
did you not let me know as soon as they called?" His hand
tightened dangerously on the half-empty tumbler. "Your
instructions were to notify me of any changes," he nearly
barked.

A crack of thunder rent through the air that matched his mood as
if he controlled the weather.

He closed his eyes to stem the rising anger coursing through him.
"What time did you receive the call?" he asked, his voice
calmer now.

Immediately, he disconnected the call and dialed another familiar
number, taking a gulp of his drink.

His blood boiled more with every unanswered ring he heard.
Ferguson should have answered on the first ring, as he always
had. A niggling suspicion entered his mind, and Lex thought
perhaps he could hazard a guess as to what or whom had really
caused Lois to regain some of her memories. Hightower would have
more questions to answer.

He let out a yell of frustration and hurled the tumbler in a fit
of rage before quickly reining in his anger, temporarily appeased
by the shattering of glass. Lex squeezed the phone, pressing it
to his forehead. A swift and unyielding reprisal was required. He
immediately gave the driver directions to return to Metropolis
before dialing another, less familiar number, preparing his next
steps.

"Montgomery," he said gruffly, "I need you to build something
for me -- a weapon to kill Superman."

He listened to her exclamations and smiled as he remembered why
he'd wanted her working on this project in the first place.
"You have 24 hours."

Her protestations induced a roll of his eyes and a twitch of his
mouth.

"No, 24 hours. Make it happen," he demanded, leaving no room
for argument. He abruptly ended the call, setting the phone down
as gently as he could manage. Another loud crack of thunder
mirrored his frustrations.

He would not allow this opportunity to eliminate his nemesis to
fail.

***

Chapter 18

Lana didn't usually knock, but she didn't feel like she could
just walk right in. Not tonight. She remained hopeful after their
earlier conversation but reluctant to let it slide that he was
talking about someone else in his sleep. Taking a deep breath,
she reminded herself that they needed each other and that this
was just a bump in the road. Working through this would likely
strengthen their relationship.

She reached up to knock on the door, suddenly nervous.

In high school, Clark had kept her at a distance, and she'd
never understood why. Despite her best efforts to put him at ease
and let him know what she wanted from him, he'd never taken her
up on her offers. She'd spent more time than she should have
over the years between then and now feeling like she was lacking
something. Then, when she'd run into him in Smallville just
before coming here, she'd realized it wasn't something *she*
was lacking, but something he thought *he* was lacking. She had
resolved to prove to him that there wasn't anything wrong with
him. He had only just begun to finally let her in, and it was
perfect.

But then he started talking about Lois in his sleep. That meant
something. Didn't it? And as much as she tried to ignore it, it
kept getting worse until she couldn't stand it anymore. Even if
he couldn't remember it.

Her breathing faltered as she heard the locks on his door click
open.

And now, here they were. At this precipice where something had to
change. She was terrified of what would become of their tentative
relationship, but his insistence that he didn't even remember
the dream gave her hope that they could move past this. So, she
came, ready to see where this would lead.

Opening the door, he smiled and invited her in with a swing of
his hand. "Thank you," he said, "for coming tonight." But he
kept his physical distance. She still didn't fully understand
why. They were both adults. They'd shared a bed, even though it
was just for sleeping. She hoped that being away from Smallville,
with no one else they knew nearby, would change that.

"Sure." She smiled a small and slightly awkward smile.

Their relationship had changed due to her efforts. She had been
gradually working her way into his life, slowly, persistently.
Maybe something about her reminded him of Lois.

Maybe he'd been talking about Lois in his sleep for a long time,
and she'd only noticed it once she had begun staying the night
at his house. That thought didn't sit well with her, and she
pushed it aside as quickly as possible.

Whatever the case, she didn't want to lose him if there was
nothing to it.

As she followed him into his apartment, she became keenly aware
that he wasn't quite himself. He'd been acting depressed since
before coming to Columbia, but tonight he seemed agitated. He
couldn't seem to decide what to do with his hands, and his hair
looked as though he'd run his fingers through it repeatedly. He
didn't quite meet her eyes, but she could see the exhaustion in
them. She took a seat on his couch and raised an eyebrow, waiting
for him to speak first.

"I've had a rough couple of days," he explained, shaking his
head.

"Me too," she agreed. She pressed her lips together and looked
away. *He* was the one with another woman on his mind, why should
he be having any trouble?

"I'm sorry," he said. And he sounded sincere. Whatever was
going on with him, all of his problems, she'd only ever tried to
help him. She looked at him again, more closely this time. His
brown eyes weren't as lively as usual. He hadn't shaved. The
corners of his mouth were decidedly down. He wrung his hands as
he leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees and look at the
rug. It broke her heart every time she saw him struggling and
renewed her resolve to help him through this.

"I need to tell you about something that happened today," he
said, not looking up. "I need you to help me figure out what to
do, but I'm worried that it will be asking too much of you."

She reached out and touched his arm then, drawing his attention
to her face. "Clark, I'll always help if I can." She smiled at
him, thinking this might be her big moment. The opportunity she
would have to finally be able to help him out of this funk he was
stuck in.

"I saw Lois today," he said slowly.

Her smile faltered, and she fought to keep in her angry retort.
How dare that woman show her face here!

"Several times, actually. Just before we went into the library,
she was down the sidewalk... That's why I practically dragged
you. I'm sorry about that. It was just... It was a really big
shock, and I didn't know what to do."

"I..." she started, unsure what she would say, fearing that her
response would make him feel like her anger was directed at him.

"Then later, it was like she was following me. It was bizarre."
He stood then and began pacing as she'd done during their
previous conversations.

"Following you?" she asked. Why would Lois be *following*
Clark? This didn't fit with anything she was expecting to hear
him say this evening.

"Look, I don't know why she's here of all places." He stopped
pacing and stood stiffly in the center of the room. Clark's
frustration showed in the way he threw his hands around as he
spoke. "I didn't ask her to come or even hope she would. In
fact, seeing her makes me want to leave, go back to Kansas,
especially after these last few days..."

Lana's mind wrestled with the ideas racing through her head,
things falling in to place quickly. She knew Clark would never
lie to her, but it also occurred to her that maybe there was
something Clark didn't know. It couldn't be merely a
coincidence that all this was happening. Lana wanted to ask more
about the encounters he'd had with Lois but imagined that it
would only put them both in a more awkward position.

She closed her eyes. She knew what she *wanted* to say, and she
knew what he *needed* to hear. But they weren't the same thing.
Most importantly, she knew that if that woman was following him
around, there was surely a reason. And what she *didn't* want,
couldn't handle, didn't matter at the moment. If two years
wasn't enough time for him to move past this guilt, would he
ever be able to?

She took a deep breath, opened her eyes, and stood to face Clark.
"Clark," she started, feeling more determined when the
confusion he was clearly feeling shown through his eyes, "I
think you should talk to her."

"What?!?" He recoiled from the snake bite she delivered.
"No!" he yelled.

"Find out why she's here at least. Find out why you are--"

"It's just to make me miserable," he cut in, "to point out
all the ways I've failed and to make sure everyone knows. In
fact, I bet that's why I kept losing my job in the past. Maybe
she's been following me around this whole time. I had no idea
she was so... evil." A disgusted look crossed his face, and he
crossed his arms over his chest.

"Clark, what you were saying in your dream just doesn't match
this." Lana could see it more clearly now after this outburst.
"Something is up. I don't know what, but you have to find
out." She stepped as close as she dared and laid her hand on his
arm. She waited until he looked at her. "Hear her out. You'll
have an easier time moving on if you do. *We* will have an easier
time moving forward after this is over."

He groaned as he rolled his eyes. Lana smiled inwardly, his
mannerisms were so endearing to her. But this mess was
complicated, and she was worried she'd have to hear about *Lois*
again.

"Look, I'm not going to stay tonight," she informed him as she
patted his arm before turning away from him to grab her things.
"This is a lot for both of us to cope with, and I just can't
put myself in this position. You understand, don't you?"

"Yeah," he replied as if he were a boy who'd been scolded.
"I'm sorry." His arms dropped to his sides, but he didn't
move to follow her or stop her as she opened the door to leave.

Lana looked back at him as he stood there full of conflict,
slouching. She could see in his eyes how disappointed he was that
she wasn't staying. He looked hurt, and she could tell that
something was about to change irrevocably. Whether it would be in
the manner she hoped for or something far worse, she didn't
know.

"Me too."

***

Lex reclined, at least physically comfortable in the plush seat
of his private jet, if not mentally. Anger was welling inside
him. His only consolation was the impending end of his enemy. He
should have disposed of the dross when he first had the chance,
forever settling Lois as *his*.

After he'd received that fateful phone call, the rain had
intensified quickly, pelting his window and preventing an
immediate departure. Now he would have to wait before he could go
after her. He would have driven. Nothing would have stopped him.
But before he'd made a rash decision, he finally saw reason.
Waiting, however impatiently, for takeoff aboard his private jet
at the airport was the obvious choice given the time it would
take to drive to *misery*.

Lex chuckled at his joke. For Missouri was surely a place of
*misery* if Clark... Superman were there, working to steal what
was rightfully his. And it would continue to be so for the man
formerly of steel once he took his family from the clutches of
that interloper.

*His family*. He sighed at the thought, his own sentimentality
once again surprising him. The moment Lois uttered that
unprecedented, sensational statement, his life had changed
permanently in a manner he could never have imagined.

He would be a father to his own flesh and blood. And that flesh
and blood would belong to Lois as well.

He no longer worried about the effects of the device on his
unborn child, but he did worry about his or her mother. He would
have to keep a watchful eye on Lois to ensure that no harm came
to her either.

A smile touched his lips, and he allowed himself to think for a
moment about his future family. The mother of his children. An
heir. Would it be a boy filled with mischief that he could
instruct in the ways of business? Would it be a girl with as much
beauty and intelligence as her mother? Who could have known how
such thoughts would fill him with a keen sense of fulfillment?

"Anything to drink, sir?" the flight attendant asked,
interrupting his reverie.

Lex looked up at the flight attendant. Once he may have
considered her attractive, enjoyed some playful banter with her,
but his mind could only think of Lois. "Yes," he finally
answered.

Taking a deep breath, he mentally shook himself from his musings.
Tonight, he needed something to help him relax, cope with the
unusual and unexpected feelings. For that, he would break his
self-imposed rule of never drinking alone. "Single malt scotch,
please. With a splash of water."

"Right away."

Lex allowed his attention to be caught by the twinkling of city
lights off in the distance and endeavored to focus his thoughts
on something more productive -- how he would defeat his foe. And
how he would ensure that Clark... Superman knew that Lois was
pregnant with *his* child.

***

Chapter 19

January 23, 1996

The air was crisp and cold in the faint predawn light. Even
without the sun, the warm front that still lingered promised
weather more appropriate for early spring later in the day. Dew
covered the grass and birds fooled by the temporary warmth
chirped merrily in the trees. It was during this time that Clark
could be truly alone with his thoughts. Thoughts of his
inadequacies and failures plagued him most days, but today his
mind was preoccupied with something else.

*Lois*.

Yesterday, she had kept showing up wherever he was. He'd seen
her at work, at the grocery store, on the trail, while he was
putting gas in the car. She had to have been following him
everywhere he went. He felt such overwhelming regret whenever he
saw her. He just wanted to get away from her and never have to
feel this way again. But was leaving Columbia something he could
do?

And why was she always *singing*??

It made him uncomfortable. The theme of each song was love. Love
lost. Love found. Love desired. There was no logical reason for
her to be singing, let alone about love. It was a slap in the
face. Torture. And Lana thought he should talk to her?

Realizing his frustrated breathing was making running difficult,
he focused on what he was doing for a moment. The breeze was cool
on his face. His heart pumped steadily as the muscles in his legs
worked to propel him forward. He swung his arms in time with his
steps, using their reach to stretch his stride.

He listened intently to the quiet world around him -- chirping
birds, rustling branches, the sound of his own steady breathing,
the crunch of the gravel as his feet touched the ground.

The sound of a bicycle approaching from behind.

When after a half minute, the bike didn't pass as he expected,
he turned to see why and was shocked to see *her* riding.

Lois was following him on a bike. Why did she have to ruin his
only time to himself?

He groaned aloud as he turned forward once more and picked up his
pace, knowing he would never outrun her.

"Clark?" she called to him as she approached. Why wouldn't she
leave him alone? "Please, Clark. I just need to talk to you for
a minute," she said, passing him. He saw her then, with her hair
pulled back from her face by the breeze that their movement
made.

This was ridiculous. This woman hated him and, as if he wasn't
already miserable enough, had come to pile on more guilt. What
would she want to talk about? Had she lost her job again because
of what had happened? Did she just like making him feel miserable
and need a good fix to last her a while?

He shook his head and turned to begin running the other way on
the trail. He knew this wouldn't stop her either, but it was all
he could think to do, and the thin trail wouldn't make it easy
for her to turn around. At least he'd bought himself a few
moments to think before being forced to listen to whatever
demoralizing reproof she would throw at him.

Lana had encouraged him to talk to her. Maybe if he just let her
say what she needed to, she'd leave him alone, and he could be
perfectly miserable without her following him around everywhere.

He stopped in the middle of the tree-lined path, steeling himself
for the conversation to come, when a commotion behind him reached
his ears. His expectation of seeing Lois struggling to turn the
bike around was dashed when instead he saw her struggling against
a person.

The man was tall and wore a coat that might have been a little
too heavy for the weather. His face was angled away from him so
that he couldn't clearly see who it was. He gripped her arms as
she struggled against him. "Clark!" she yelled, pulling one arm
free and reaching in his direction, entreating him. She was in
trouble.

Clark took a few steps forward but staggered as a sharp pain shot
from his head through every inch of him. With the next step, the
pain intensified, paralyzing him. He looked up to see the horror
in Lois's eyes before he stumbled to the ground, catching
himself with his hands. The small pebbles felt like needles on
his palms. He reached to cradle his head.

"No!" she screamed. "Stop!"

What was happening? He was unable to move. He would fail her...
again. But this time in a way that was far more perilous. What
would that man do to her?

The commotion stopped, and Clark glanced up to see Lois looking
at him with... understanding? And worry? The man glared at him, a
satisfied smirk on his face. He seemed to sneer at Clark as his
free hand came up to Lois's neck with something in it. Clark
reached toward them in a feeble attempt to make a difference. But
the man brought whatever it was to Lois's neck, and he watched
in panic as her body went limp in the man's arms.

Adrenaline coursing through him, Clark struggled to get up and
move closer to them. He *had* to at least try to help. Reaching
his feet, he lost his balance when the pain became unbearable.
The sound of something small hitting the ground and bouncing to a
stop near him coincided with the pain redoubling. He grunted at
its sudden increase and tried to slow his breathing. What was
happening to him?? He was consumed by invisible flames burning
him until everything went black.

***

Jimmy walked up the steps of the town home. He was physically
exhausted, but his brain was functioning at full speed. His phone
woke him early this morning, and the voice on the other end was
one of the patients he'd scheduled an interview with later in
the day. Something had happened, though, and they wanted to meet
now instead of waiting until later.

Naturally, Jimmy pulled himself out of bed as quickly as he could
and did the minimal amount of getting ready before racing to
their house. He took a moment to catch his breath before he
knocked on the door and waited for someone to answer.

"Mr. Olsen," Ronald Simmons greeted as he opened the door.
"Thank you for coming so early. I'm sorry if I woke you." He
thrust his hand forward and shook Jimmy's hand as if the sun
hadn't just risen above the horizon only an hour ago.

"Not at all. You sounded like you had something important to
tell me when I spoke to you on the phone." Jimmy entered the
house at Mr. Simmons's invitation, and they found a place at the
dining room table to sit. "Are those the medical records?"
Jimmy asked, gesturing towards the stack of papers on the table.

"Yes, those copies are for you," Mr. Simmons answered. "I'm
sure you'll find the same thing as with the other patients, but
what I have to tell you is more important than that."

"What is it, Mr. Simmons?" Jimmy asked as he pulled his notepad
out of his satchel.

"I remembered."

Jimmy stilled at those words before he excitedly turned to face
Mr. Simmons, his eyes wide. "The procedure?"

"The whole day." Mr. Simmons turned toward the door and in a
very polite manner called for his wife. "Vera, Honey? Are you
coming?" Jimmy heard a faint reply from some faraway room as
Ronald turned back to whisper, "I'm going to let her tell you
because she's so excited about it."

"When did it happen?"

"This morning." The look on Mr. Simmons's face was filled with
intrigue and excitement. It was contagious, and Jimmy felt his
own excitement growing.

"Oh, Mr. Olsen. Wait till you hear." An excited woman came in
rubbing her hands on a dish cloth. She stopped abruptly and
smiled. "Can I get you anything, dear?"

Before Jimmy could put together a response, Mr. Simmons answered
for him. "No, Vera. Just tell him what happened."

"Oh, Ronald," she said, exasperated, but smiled at him before
sitting down at the table. "I was cleaning in the kitchen this
morning, and I just can't do any cleaning without singing.
Ronald woke up and came to say good morning to me, and we chatted
for a bit while I worked on the oven. As he was leaving, I
started singing 'Miss Otis Regrets' and that's when it
happened."

"Everything got all fuzzy, and I felt like I was falling,"
Ronald said. "Then it was like I was reliving the things that
happened."

"And then it was over, quick as that." Vera snapped her fingers
and nodded.

"You think it was the song?" Jimmy looked from Vera to Ronald.
Both nodded again. "How can you be sure?"

"Well, I always clean the oven on this day of the week and I
always sing, but it's been ages since I sang 'Miss Otis
Regrets,' and it happened as soon as I started singing."

An interesting conclusion to reach, but it made sense. Jimmy
jotted down the name of the song as he thought about what this
could mean for the story. His eyes widened as he remembered the
Mayfields' story and that Alexia had mentioned music. They would
have heard it as soon as they walked in. "Who sings 'Miss Otis
Regrets'?" Jimmy asked hesitantly.

"Nat King Cole."

Jimmy frowned at the answer. *Could it be? Or is it merely a
coincidence?*

***

"Clark?" a male voice filtered through the din resonating in
Clark's head. Where was he? What had happened? He felt a nudge
to his shoulder and opened his eyes to see an unfamiliar face
frowning down at him. He was sprawled flat on his back on the
ground.

Closing his eyes, he moved his arms to push himself up. Agony
rippled through his body as he tried to sit and a groan escaped
as he fell back to the ground. How could anyone hurt this much?
What had caused it?

He heard sounds of the stranger moving around, scraping across
the gravel, followed by footsteps receding quickly as the pain
suddenly abated. The footsteps returning made Clark flinch, but,
to his relief, the pain didn't return.

His body relaxed, but he kept his eyes closed and remained
motionless on the ground, catching his breath, trying to
understand what had just happened.

"Clark?" the male voice asked again.

"H--How do you know my name?" Clark's voice came out thin and
struggling.

"I'm a friend of Lois's. I've been helping her," he said.
"My name's Scott."

Clark's eyes opened wide, and he rose as quickly as he could
under the circumstances. His head swam at the sudden movement,
and he wobbled and grasped Scott's outstretched hand when it was
offered. Looking around, he saw no sign of her or the man or
Lois. "Someone took her!" he grunted out.

"I know, I... I saw the whole thing."

Clark turned to look at him with anger in his eyes. Even in his
fear and private anguish he'd tried to do *something*, however
unsuccessfully. Yet this seemingly healthy individual had sat
idly by doing nothing? "Why didn't you try to help?"

"It's a long story, but Lois can handle herself with Lex. It's
you I'm worried about now."

"Lex?" Clark repeated. Clark tried to feel relieved that Lois
wasn't in any danger, but the situation seemed anything but
harmless.

Scott ignored his question and looked him over. Shaking his head,
he then began looking around them.

It took another moment for Clark to process the rest of Scott's
words. "Me!? I'm fine." Clark brushed himself off. "But
someone just *kidnapped* Lois."

"She will be okay for now," Scott assured. "But she needs your
help."

Clark huffed. "She doesn't need my help." He shook his head.
The last time he tried to help Lois, it ended badly for everyone.
His help was the last thing she needed.

"She does, and you are the only one I know of who can help
her." Scott had a look of resolve on his face that startled
Clark. Given his response to the abduction of his friend, he was
oddly calm.

Clark grunted a laugh. "Sorry, I think you've got me confused
with someone else." He turned to continue on the path but was
stopped by Scott grabbing his arm. Clark shook it off but turned
to look at the man.

"No, I don't." The determination in his face and voice made
Clark pause. "Look I know you have no idea what I'm talking
about yet. Lois was trying to get you to remember, but ..."
Scott reached into his pocket and pulled out an unmarked CD in a
clear case. "Clark, I know this doesn't make any sense, but I
want you to take this CD. Find a safe, preferably private, place
and listen to it."

Clark eyed the CD and wished he could be anywhere but here.
"What's on it?" he finally asked.

"Nat King Cole." Scott held out the CD further.

*You stepped out of a dream...*

*Why it's almost like bein' in love...*

*L is for the way you look at me...*

The songs Lois had been singing. They were all sung by Nat King
Cole.

Clark frowned, unable to make sense of this. "What's going
on?"

Scott shook his head. "Someone... messed with your memories.
Listen to the songs. When you're ready, come find me at this
hotel." Scott handed him a hotel business card with a
handwritten number on it and took a step back. "If you aren't
there by dinner time, I'm going without you."

He nodded to Clark as he began to turn and continued down the
path in the direction Clark had come from.

"Going where?" Clark shouted after him.

Scott turned to walk backwards, arms out to the side as he
answered the question, "To save Lois." He picked up his pace,
jogging backwards for a moment as he shouted, "Remember!" He
then turned and ran for several paces before disappearing onto a
very narrow side trail.

*Remember*?

***

Chapter 20

Lex stood in front of the door to the hotel room he knew Ferguson
to be in and reached out to firmly knock. The sound of movement
in the room reached his ears, and Lex waited for the door to
open, preparing to dress down his wife's inept guard.

Ferguson had clearly been expecting someone else, Lois, of
course, when the door opened. "Lex," Ferguson said without
attempting to mask his surprise. "I'm glad you've come," he
said as Lex pushed past him into the room. "Something is up with
Lois."

Lex turned his head to look over his shoulder and eyed him, his
patience dwindling. "And you are only just now telling me
this?" Taking a deep breath, he reminded himself that Lois was
safely aboard his private jet, and he was merely coming to leave
some instructions for this man.

Ferguson closed the door and took the few quick steps to stand
just inside the main room. "I'm sorry," Ferguson said,
sincerity and concern coloring his tone. "I should have. I just
wasn't sure what to do. I was waiting until--"

"Until when?" Lex snapped, turning abruptly to face him,
searching for signs of duplicity.

"Until I knew what was going on with her."

"Trying to take matters into your own hands?" He had assumed,
based on the way in which Ferguson and his wife had left, that
Ferguson had something to do with their disappearance. But if
even his wife's guard was unsure of what was happening, perhaps
Hightower had been right. Still, Ferguson could be involved and
his show of genuine concern merely a result of having lost
control of the situation. "How could you let her come out here
where you know Kent to be? What were you thinking?"

"She was... confused, distressed. I am only trying to keep her
safe." The palm up stance Ferguson assumed painted a picture of
genuine concern that, while comforting, inspired just a bit of
jealousy. It was Lex's place to keep her safe and no one
else's.

"Ought I be jealous?" he sneered.

"No, no! It's not like that." Ferguson appeared uncomfortable.
"You can't expect me to watch someone as a full-time job and
not begin to worry about that person's well-being."

Lex considered that statement for a moment. "I suppose you
wouldn't be as good at the assignment if you didn't care about
her well-being." Choosing to allow it to pass for the moment,
Lex moved the conversation to the situation at hand. "So, tell
me. What is going on with her?" Lex clasped his hands behind his
back and waited, motionless, with his eyebrows high in
expectation. Ferguson's explanation would reveal whether he was
with or against Lex.

"I think she's remembered some things." It seemed that
Ferguson was choosing to be honest with him, a sign of loyalty.

"And you are here instead of with her? Have you any idea what
she has been up to this morning?" There was no sign of Ferguson
when Lex had taken her from that trail. He didn't even seem to
realize she was missing at this point.

"She said she needed to take a walk to clear her head. She's
really struggling. I didn't want to put any more stress on
her... since she is expecting." Ferguson breathed out as he
leaned on the dresser.

Lex was initially caught off guard by the sentimentality that had
been weaving its way through him over the past two months, but as
it bubbled to the surface now, he reluctantly embraced it. He did
not want any harm to come to Lois or the baby, regardless of the
circumstances. Ferguson had been right to give her space if, in
fact, his motives were the way he presented them. Lex released
his hands and walked toward the window, peering out at the trees
concealing any view to be had. He relaxed as a plan to deal with
the situation finally solidified in his mind. "Yes, well, I have
her now, aboard the jet. We'll head to the chateau after you and
I are done here."

"Is she alright?" Scott asked, surprised.

"She is. And I thank you for your concern," Lex began as he
adjusted his coat to leave this dilapidated hotel room. "One
last thing before I leave. I noticed she is not wearing her
wedding rings. Where are they?"

Lex looked up when an answer was not immediately given to see
worry written in Ferguson's features. "I don't want to make
things worse for Lois," he began, "because I don't know
what's caused... any of this... but I don't think any of it is
intentional." Lex watched as Ferguson crossed the room and
rifled through something near the bed before approaching Lex.
"Lois gave me her rings this morning."

"She what?" Lex turned to face him, saw the rings in
Ferguson's hand, and took a halting step forward. While this was
jarring, Lex took the gesture as confirmation that he did indeed
have Ferguson's loyalty. "She has remembered more than I
thought."

"She's confused. She doesn't know what is real and what
isn't."

Lex picked up the rings and rubbed them between his fingers. It
was certainly fortunate that Lex had arrived when he did.
Squeezing them in his fist, Lex shook his head to clear it. If
she had remembered enough to doubt his affection, she would be
feeling very confused. He doubled his resolve to put things back
to the way they had been.

Still, Lex needed to guarantee the appearance of his weakened
adversary at the chateau in order to complete his new plan. In
this state, Clark Kent was just as vulnerable as any man, but Lex
had carefully scripted a death befitting the alien that would
strip him of everything. Lex nodded to himself and tucked the
rings in his coat pocket before giving his instructions. "I need
you to make sure that Kent comes after her."

Scott's eyebrows raised. "Why not just kill him now?"

Lex narrowed his eyes and looked Ferguson over appraisingly.
"Because that isn't good enough for him. He needs to understand
a few things before he dies, and it is necessary for him to come
to the chateau to learn those lessons." Lex strode toward the
door. Should the man prove himself by following through with his
instructions, Lex would be sure to make his expectations for
appropriate behavior in any situation clearer in the future.
"See that he arrives before the day is over."

***

A constant, low rumble was the first sound Lois registered when
she awoke. Keeping her eyes closed and her body as still as
possible, she struggled to determine where she was. The sound was
surely the dull roar of jet engines, which meant she must be on a
plane. She was lying down with her head propped on a pillow, and
her hands and feet were free. The dull ache in her neck and
dryness in her throat were the only sources of discomfort she was
aware of. Wherever she was headed, she was okay for the moment.

Just to be on the safe side, she continued to feign sleep while
she tried to remember what had happened and how she had gotten to
this point.

She'd been riding a bicycle. Clark had run past her. She'd been
about to sing another song in an effort to release his memories.
Lex had stopped her, holding her back.

Lex.

Maintaining her stillness, she relived the scene. She was
watching Clark stumble in pain with a mix of confusion and fear
evident in his face. Lex must have had kryptonite. How much did
he know?

She wasn't really safe at all. He'd taken her with him. She
must be on his private jet. *Their* private jet. She was nauseous
at the thought.

Her ability to recall many of the dangerous and seemingly
hopeless situations she and Clark had been in before eased the
fear momentarily before it occurred to her that she hadn't yet
released his memories... Superman was still gone.

Panicked breaths came quickly and before she could calm them, a
hand came to rest on her shoulder. Lex's voice drew her eyes
open before she was able to decide what she would do and how she
would do it.

"Lois, darling?" He was leaning over her, looking at her with a
frown creasing his brow, the concern evident in his eyes.

She frowned at her conflicting thoughts. Half her mind still felt
an unreasonable attachment to him, the other half was angry,
knowing him as a monster.

"Are you alright?" His voice was tender, worried.

"I... I think so," she answered as she attempted to sit up.
Seeing her struggle, Lex reached to support her, which did not
relieve the confusion Lois felt. She *knew* just how manipulative
and unscrupulous Lex was, yet these warm feelings for him still
responded to his care. The nausea overwhelmed her suddenly, and
she was surprised when Lex provided her with an airsick bag.

Had he expected this?

This warm-hearted, despicable Lex was such a contradiction. He
was vile enough to have done his utmost to ruin the life she had
known and replace it with the one of his choosing, yet
affectionate and concerned enough to care about her needs. She
recalled the way he'd responded three days ago at their home
when she'd told him she was pregnant and began to wonder if
somewhere within that fabricated exterior, an actual heart was
beating. *A very small, shriveled and black heart*, she reminded
herself.

Wiping her face with the proffered napkin, she shook her head.
Anger flared again at the knowledge of everything that had
happened because this selfish man -- if he could be called man,
Clark was more human than Lex -- would stop at nothing to have
his way. She stamped it down in favor of using her position to
gain any information she could. "What are we doing on the
jet?"

"You and Scott made a little detour on your way to the chateau.
I came to you to bring you home. Do you not remember?" His
expression was inscrutable though his voice held the same concern
as before.

"I ..." She stopped. Admitting anything would hinder her
ability to find out what he knew... or what he was willing to
tell her. She reached for her head and used her feigned condition
to take some time to think. "I don't feel well." Out of the
corner of her eye, she saw Lex reach for a glass on the table at
the end of the couch.

"Here, this will help." Lex handed her the glass of water, and
she took several sips to relieve the burning in her throat before
passing the glass back to him.

How convenient that her own lie provided such an excellent
excuse. She had previously felt a bit guilty for deceiving him
but remembering the kind of maliciousness he was capable of made
her feel like he deserved everything that came to him.

"Please, lie back and relax," he suggested. Lex guided a pillow
under her head as she leaned back. "We don't need you under any
undue stress in your condition."

"Where is Scott?" she asked as she closed her eyes.

"He is still in Columbia," he answered. "I spoke with him just
before we left. He'll meet up with us at the chateau later. I
had an errand for him to run."

A tingle of foreboding sent a chill through her. What sort of
*errand* could Lex possibly have in Columbia, Missouri? But she
feared she knew the answer to that question, and it only made
keeping calm that much more difficult.

"What did he tell you?" she asked, wondering herself what Scott
would have said in that conversation. She believed Scott was on
her side. And if he was, surely he would not have told Lex
everything. Only hinted? Made something up?

"He said that you were confused, that you wanted to talk to
Clark." She opened her eyes, expecting to see an inaccurate
representation of Lex's current state. However, she knew the
disapproval she saw in his eyes was genuine... "Why on earth
would you want to talk to that miscreant? Hasn't he caused you
enough pain already?"

She shook her head and then placed a hand on his arm. "Please,
don't hold it against Scott. It was my idea. I needed to ask
Clark about... something." Keeping her mask in place, she smiled
inwardly as his expression led her to think that he believed her
excuse. But the seconds that drew out destroyed that confidence.

"Lois, I found your notebook," he said, his eyes boring into
her. But it wasn't anger smoldering behind his eyes. She wished
she knew what he was thinking.

She searched her memory of what she'd written and how she'd
organized things. What excuse for that could she possibly have?
She swung her legs back to the floor and positioned herself in a
sitting position next to Lex. Wringing her fingers, she distorted
the truth. "I... I've been having... dreams."

"Darling," Lex began, taking her hand in his, believing her
story, "think for a moment. How could Clark possibly have
anything to say to you about your *dreams*? He's been out of
your life, thankfully so, for years. I can't imagine why you'd
want to bring him back into it. Have you forgotten what he did to
you?"

*Actually*... She glanced down at the hand tenderly and gently
grasping hers. The judgmental look on Lex's face didn't match
the affection in his hand, and she found it offensive. It was as
if he was treating her like a child. Funny, she didn't have any
memories of him behaving this way over the past two months.
Perhaps when he didn't have anything to worry about, he was
capable of being a decent person. Even if he could never truly
*be* a decent person.

"He must be made to keep his distance from you. Which reminds
me." Lois watched nervously as Lex used his free hand to reach
into his pocket. "I was hurt to find out that you had removed
your rings."

Lois prayed that Lex hadn't noticed her sharp intake of breath
at the sight of the rings she'd given to Scott when they arrived
in Columbia. As she was leaving the tiny regional airport, she
had decided that it would be better if she didn't have to
explain them to Clark when he recovered his memories. She'd
given them to Scott to hold.

But why would Scott have given them to Lex? Was he not truly on
her side? Was it to keep Lex from suspecting his involvement?

***

"I..." she started. She frowned, and Lex could see her struggle
to control her breathing. She was doing a fair job of concealing
her emotions, but now he could see the contest between fear and
hopelessness dancing in her eyes. "What did you do to Clark?"
She shook her head, pausing before clarifying, "On the trail, he
was hurting, what did you do to make him hurt like that?"

Lex was not entirely surprised that she would ask this. After
all, he knew she'd regained some of her memories, and he would
have to take care of that. He gave her credit for attempting to
keep up the charade but wondered how long she would be able to do
so. His own feelings of fury toward the man who could take her
from him again and concern for his child growing inside the woman
he loved warred inside him.

"I merely sent him a warning," he explained, choosing to be as
patient as he could manage under the circumstances. The last
thing he wanted was to add to her stress, knowing that it would
not be good for her or the baby.

"A warning?" The increase in her frown and narrowing of her
eyes told Lex that he'd pushed a button. He found her tenacity
endearing. "Lex, I am not a ch--"

Lex held up his hand to stop her, knowing that it would further
infuriate her but also that time was running out. The fact that
he found an enraged Lois even more attractive than a compliant
one only served to push him to provoke her more. "It's alright,
Darling." He covered her hand with his and smiled at her. While
she was distracted by her own anger, he easily slipped the rings
back onto her finger. "Soon, we'll be back at the chateau and
all will be as it was."

She jerked her hand from his as she stood up from the couch. He
could see her composure crumbling before him and knew that while
it was predominantly her anger, she was beginning to lose control
for another reason.

"What if I don't want to go to the chateau?" she spat.

Lex took a slow deep breath, standing and moving to close the
distance between them. It wouldn't do for him to lose his
control as well. She wasn't in her right mind now, and he would
have to be tolerant just a little while longer. "Now, Lois, why
wouldn't you want to go to the chateau?"

"Because you've... done something to me." She backed away from
him until she bumped into the door of the cockpit.

The resentment in her eyes pricked a nerve and caused Lex to lose
his ability to care how she responded to his words. "Yes," he
responded with his eyebrows lifted, reaching his hand toward her
abdomen with a mirthless smile. "I certainly have."

"Don't touch me." She shoved his hand away and pushed past
him, releasing a single sob that sounded remarkably like a
certain name.

Lex chided himself for his foolish behavior. This was not going
as planned, but she would soon be asleep, calm and relaxed once
more. He could see now that he would have to choose. It had been
such a fantastic idea to completely ruin the life of his nemesis,
strip him of everything he had, as was done to Lex, while having
his prize as well. But now he saw the fallacy in that line of
reasoning.

"You know, I thought I was doing the considerate thing by
allowing him to live out his miserable life," Lex said, turning
slowly toward her as he felt his patience slip away. "But you
have put me in a difficult position because, while I want to do
whatever it takes to make you happy, I certainly cannot allow him
to live knowing that it is a risk to what we have."

"*We* don't have anything. You *invented* all of it," she
spat.

Ah, the admission he'd waited for and had hoped to lure out of
her. She *was* aware of the circumstances. Lex took this moment
to pour himself a drink at the counter adjacent to the end of the
couch.

"Did I?" he asked innocently. "I recall many instances where
you were a *very* willing partner." He looked at her over the
rim of his glass as he took a sip and reminisced over the last
two months during which she had lived every minute as his
faithful wife.

"In your dreams," she seethed.

"Well, yes, there also." Lex couldn't help but smile at his
joke. "But, darling--"

"Don't call me that," she shouted.

He breathed and began again, more forcefully this time, "Once
you forgot about Clark, *I* was your top priority, and I know you
still remember the past two years of wedded bliss. And while it
may be true that the first part of our marriage is somewhat
different than you remember, you cannot deny that the past two
months have been very much a reality. You have *willingly* been
my wife since the procedure took place."

"You have clearly misinterpreted the word *willingly*." Lois's
narrow-eyed glare didn't cover the green tinge developing on her
face. Lex looked away from her, reminding himself that this was
only temporary. The loving looks they shared would return soon
enough.

"It is of no consequence," he said more to himself. "I can
handle your ire until the procedure can be repeated. And rest
assured that there is no risk to the baby."

"There is no baby," she stated, crossing her arms over her
chest. "I lied."

Lex wanted to quickly turn to her but maintained control of
himself as he thought through all the evidence that suggested she
was lying about that. "Do you not recall your fatigue leading up
to our anniversary party?

"Planning took a lot out of me," she retorted.

"And how do you intend to explain your morning sickness?" he
challenged.

Her breathing rate seemed to be slowing as she blinked a few
times before narrowing her eyes at him. "Revulsion," she
replied slowly.

"I see." Her arrow hit its mark, but Lex chose the high road
knowing only a few minutes remained. "Well, I suppose I'll have
to look into the truth of your declaration soon. But since I can
see that you are thoroughly incensed, and as I don't wish to put
you under any further stress, it makes the drug I put in your
drink that much more justified."

She quickly looked at the glass of water she'd taken sips from
earlier before turning a fearful gaze on him that quickly turned
to indignation. Yes, an angry Lois was very attractive, but that
sort of thinking would have to wait.

"You will *never* get away with this." She closed her eyes and
opened them very slowly. "Clark will come for me."

"I'm counting on it." He smiled at her and felt a twinge of
regret at the way he was surely making her feel -- as if she was
the target of his anger when it was strictly directed at his
nemesis.

Lois opened her mouth to speak as she took a step toward him, but
nothing came out. Lex closed the distance between them as her
eyes began to roll back and caught her, gently laying her on the
couch once more. He repositioned a pillow beneath her head and,
as he lowered her head onto it, paused for a moment, observing
her closely.

It had been too long since he'd last seen her, and he missed
everything about her. Her sharp words from moments ago filtered
through his reverie, and he gently rested his hand on her abdomen
as he considered the facts. The changing hormones of pregnancy
seemed to be the only reasonable explanation for why she'd
regained her memories. In addition, she had been sick to her
stomach multiple times over the past four days, today included.

In fact, she seemed to be sick nearly constantly. He'd been
witness to it. There was no faking that. Could there have been
some other reason for her symptoms? Was it merely revulsion?
Perhaps it was the migraine Scott had suggested that first night.
But she hadn't complained of any headaches. What else could it
be?

"Oh, Lois," he said, bringing her relaxed hand to his lips. A
mix of emotions muddled his thoughts, but he refused to give in
to the heartache he felt at the idea of losing something so
precious to him as his unborn child until he could verify it one
way or the other.

***

Chapter 21

It had been a last-minute decision to enroll. Lana's life in
Smallville, including her job working at the bank, just wasn't
fulfilling. And when she sat and thought about her options and
what she really wanted out of life, journalism sat at the top of
the list. She had been accepted into the journalism school just
before the next semester would commence.

She had considered herself lucky when she ran into Clark that day
in Smallville and learned they would be in the same place
together. She could hardly contain her excitement. She never had
a chance with him in high school because of the way he had kept
his distance. But he was kind and considerate. Protective and
trustworthy. He was the best she could have hoped for. No one had
ever measured up to Clark, and no one ever would.

And life had seen fit to give them a second chance.

Attending journalism school and practically living with Clark had
not been quite what she had expected, but determination to get
what she wanted out of life kept her going. Today, however, she
trudged across campus on her way to meet with a group of fellow
students, feeling bothered by the turn of events.

This thing with Lois put a wedge between them, and she wanted to
rip it away and insist that *she* was all he needed. But unless
he dealt with it, Lois would always be there, separating them.
Maybe her friends were right. Maybe Clark was a lost cause, and
there was no hope of Lana guiding him back to the incredible man
she used to know.

If only she had some sort of sign that a life with Clark was
possible. A light at the end of the tunnel. A glimmer of what
could be. She knew Clark loved her, but she didn't know how deep
it ran... or if it was more than what he felt for Lois.

She groaned aloud, fisting her hands. She ignored the strange
looks from those she passed and continued forward.

She was still on a precipice, waiting for something to change.
Ready to fall or to jump, not knowing what to do or how to do
it.

"Lana!"

She knew it was Clark instantly. He was coming toward her on the
path. Judging by his appearance, he'd run the entire way. But
more importantly, something was wrong. As he stopped in front of
her, she thought about how sick he looked, like he'd been
dragged through the metaphorical mud.

"Clark?"

"I need your help, Lana," he blurted as he came to stop in
front of her, placing his hands on his hips and breathing
deeply.

Her heart leapt at his words, and she smiled at him.

"Something happened to Lois," he said between breaths.

And there it was. Her sign. Her smile disappeared, and she felt
the sting of tears. This emotional roller coaster she was on
needed to end.

"Can we go to my place and listen to this CD?" He held up an
unmarked CD case as if it held the answers to some great puzzle.

Lana blinked at Clark's strange request. "I don't
understand."

"Lois was following me on the trail this morning, and someone
kidnapped her. This guy who was helping her, before she got
kidnapped, that is, he said I have to help Lois and gave me this
CD." He held the CD up and looked at it with uncertainty. "He
said..." But he didn't finish, he just shook his head then hung
it as he stared at his feet.

Lana groaned internally. Was it so much to ask for a simple,
uncomplicated relationship in which Clark loved her and only her
and there was nothing standing in their way? It certainly felt
like it was all too much right now. She wanted to slap him in the
face, knock some sense into him. Maybe she should. Could he not
see what this was doing to her?

But when he looked up at her with those puppy dog eyes again, and
she saw the inner turmoil he was feeling so plainly etched on his
face, she knew she'd do anything for him.

Even this ridiculous undertaking.

"Look, I know it's a lot to ask... too much. But you are the
only one I trust."

She shook her head and took a deep breath, steeling herself for
whatever was to come. "Oh, Clark, who could say no to you?" She
took his elbow and turned them toward his apartment, forgetting
her own plans.

Fifteen minutes later, they were walking up the front steps to
his apartment, Lana kicking herself the whole way as Clark
explained just how horrible the past few days had been for him.
This was even worse than normal for Clark. It was like that
children's book she read as a kid, *Alexander and the Terrible,
Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day*. She silently hoped that someday
she would understand why she put herself in these awkward
positions. But she already knew: she just couldn't say no to
this man. She loved him and would do anything for him.

"So, what's on the CD?" she finally asked once they entered
the apartment.

"Nat King Cole." He went straight to the stereo beside the
couch, opening the CD case and tossing it onto the couch once he
had retrieved the disc.

"What are we listening for?" she asked as she attempted to get
comfortable on the couch, though the circumstances that brought
her here made it difficult to do. Picking up the CD case revealed
that it was just a copy of an album or a mix of different songs.

"I don't know." Clark pressed play and sat on the floor,
facing the stereo.

A catchy intro of piano and guitar preceded a song Lana
recognized.

*L is for the way you look at me*

*O is for the only one I see*

But she wouldn't get to hear more. Clark pressed the button to
advance to the next track.

"Hey, I thought you had to listen to these," Lana pointed out
as the intro to the next song, one she didn't recognize, began.

Clark shook his head. "Lois already sang this one to me."

"I'm sorry," Lana was unable to keep the shock from her voice.
"What did you say??"

"Every time I saw her yesterday, she sang to me," Clark said,
as if it were both obvious and perfectly acceptable.

Lana simply sat with her mouth open as anger ignited in her. Lois
was singing *love songs* to him? Why hadn't he mentioned that?
It seemed like an important piece of information since it was
just as confusing as the rest of this crazy, messed up story. She
could believe it wasn't an intentional omission given the
strangeness of it all, but it still grated on her nerves.

The jazz opening of guitar and piano seemed to draw on forever,
leaving Clark and Lana in a tense silence that she was sure he
wasn't even aware of. Lana didn't recognize the song and when
the music began to build up, she felt relief coming only to have
that taken away by more of the same instrumental music. She tried
to focus on why she was doing this. *Clark needs me*, she kept
repeating to herself. *Clark needs me.*

*It is only a paper moon.*

*Hanging over a cardboard scene*

*But it wouldn't be make believe*

*If you believe in me.*

"What's supposed to happen?" she asked.

"I'm supposed to remember something." Clark shook his head and
reached to advance to the next track for more jazzy piano and
guitar to begin.

*A buzzard took a monkey for a ride in the air*

*The monkey thought that everything was on the square*

He advanced to the next track.

The absurdity of his behavior was increasing, and she wasn't
sure how she should react. "A song is supposed to help you
remember something?" she asked, trying to understand. Why
couldn't he just explain what was going on?

She narrowed her eyes at him when he shushed her, throwing logs
on the embers of her ire.

*I love you*

*For sentimental reasons*

Next track.

"Clark..." she tried to get his attention.

This time he held a hand up to her, and it was all she could do
to not slap it away.

***

*There was a boy*

*A very strange enchanted boy*

That wasn't it. Clark wasn't sure what was supposed to happen,
but so far none of these songs did any more for him than the ones
Lois sang yesterday.

Next track.

*They try to tell us we're too young*

*To young to really be in love*

This wasn't it either.

Next track.

*Gee it's great after being out late*

Nope. Next track.

*I was walkin' along mindin' my business*

As Clark reached to advance the track once more, he became
vaguely aware of Lana moving behind him. He turned in time to see
her reach for the door. "Lana?" he asked bewildered. "What are
you doing?" He needed her, why was she leaving?

"Clark, this is stupid," she said as she spun on her heels. "I
just tried to get your attention *repeatedly*, and you're so
focused on listening to the stupid songs. Which you aren't even
listening to all of!"

Clark watched her take a slow deep breath when she paused. He got
up off the floor and opened his mouth to speak, but she put her
hand up to stop him.

"I don't have any idea what is going on, but I know it doesn't
include me. I'm just... in the way, accidentally mixed up in
some... crazy happening. If you have to remember something by
listening to music, I bet I know what it is and when you do
remember, you'll realize that I was right about you and Lois."
She turned away, shaking her head.

"Lana--" he started, taking a step toward her.

"No, Clark." The eyes she turned on him froze him in place.
Regret and resolve and anger filled her expression before it
softened, awareness dawning. He wished he knew exactly what she
was thinking instead of these vague emotions. She gave a
strangled laugh. "It's so obvious to me now."

Clark searched his mind for anything obvious, but all he found
was a jumbled mess of despair, guilt, and shame. And mixed in was
this irrational need to go after Lois knowing full well that it
would only lead to more of the same feelings. What could Lana
possibly know that Clark didn't?

"I was right, you are in love with her," she said.

"I am not!" he protested. "Have you not heard anything I've
said for the past three days?" Anger and impatience boiled
inside him, and he breathed as if he'd just finished running a
marathon.

She took the few steps to reach him, her face not holding the
anger he expected but rather an expression of sad acceptance. He
was thoroughly confused and unable to move, only able to watch as
she stretched up to kiss him on the cheek. When she pulled back,
she looked into his eyes and, in their depths, he saw what he was
doing to her. He felt sick.

"I thought I could fix you, help you get back to the person you
were back in high school. Love you until you love me..." She
pressed her hand to his cheek and produced the most tragic smile
Clark had ever seen.

"Lana," he finally managed to say as she pulled away. She shook
her head, stopping him.

"I don't know what happened, but something did. You have to
find her and put everything back to the way it was." She
shrugged, opened the door to leave and said, "And I'm not a
part of it." She turned to look over her shoulder at him.
"Goodbye, Clark."

The door closed, and his mind reeled. Not only had he ruined
Lois's life, now he'd ruined Lana's life as well.

*I've been hit!*

*This is it! This is it! I, T, It!*

Clark turned toward the stereo, still feeling stunned.

*I was walkin' along mindin' my business,*

*When love came and hit me in the eye,*

*Flash, bam, alakazam,*

*Out of an orange colored, purple striped, pretty, green polka
dot sky,*

*Flash, bam, alakazam, and goodbye.*

Clark ran a frustrated hand through his hair, leaving it mussed.
There was no bottom to this pit of despair he had fallen into
over two years ago. Everything he did was wrong. Every choice he
made hurt others. And he was powerless to stop it.

The violins of an orchestra began the next song on the CD. Clark
recognized the intro as one of his mother's favorite songs, one
he had no interest in hearing right now. He reached to turn the
stereo off as the smooth voice of Nat King Cole drew out the
first word of the song out.

*Smile*

As his vision grew cloudy, and he began to feel light headed,
Clark wondered if the emotional stress he'd been under was
finally starting to have physical effects.

*Tho' your heart is aching.*

But as he blinked and shook his head to clear it, it worsened
instead, and he was transported to a park where he walked...

With Lois.

###

*May 21, 1995*

"*You chilly?" he asked as he put his arm around Lois's
shoulder. It was a cool evening, and it smelled like rain was
approaching.*

"*No," she replied simply. She reached up to lace her fingers
into his, gripping the hand hanging over her shoulder. The action
warmed him and solidified his resolve.*

"*Lois, I've been thinking," he started tentatively. He had so
much he wanted to say to her and after thinking for a long time,
he finally knew how he might tell her everything. He hoped he had
the courage to see it through.*

"*Me too," she said.*

"*What about?" he asked. He wanted to know every thought that
ever went through her head, to know her completely.*

"*You first," she insisted.*

"*Okay," he said with a smile. He lowered his head, preparing
himself to pour his heart out and to hear her reaction. He
watched his feet as they walked, unable to look at her just yet.
He wouldn't be able to say all of this with those eyes of hers
bewitching him. "Sometimes... you think you're immortal. You
start to think that the people around you are too. And it just
takes a second to realize how... wrong you are... about
everything."*

*They stopped there in the middle of the walkway, and Clark
turned Lois to face him.*

"*Listen," Clark began, looking Lois straight in the eye. The
compassion he saw in her eyes made his breath catch, but he
pushed on. "What I'm trying to say, Lois, is I almost lost you
and I... feel... ashamed." He looked away as he composed
himself. Why was he so nervous about this?*

*Lois moved into his line of vision. "Ashamed? Why?" she asked,
searching his eyes. The sincerity in her voice gave him the
courage he needed to keep going.*

"*I kept pushing you away even when I promised I'd stop."
Clark stared directly into her eyes, forcing his next words to
penetrate any defenses she had left. "If you died without ever
knowing why, I'd never be able to forgive myself. Because I love
you."*

*When she smiled at him and reached to run her fingers through
his hair and caress his face, he melted into the touch and knew
he had made the right decision. He took her hand and led her to
the fountain they had neared while walking and motioned for her
to sit.*

*A flash of lightning brightened their surroundings, and a crack
of thunder rent through the air. He looked up as the impending
storm broke free.*

"*Come on! Give me a break!" he yelled at the sky. Would
everything try to prevent him from saying what he needed to
say?*

"*You want to go back?" Lois asked.*

*Clark looked back at her with determination. She sat, ducking
her head to avoid getting rain in her eyes, but the twinkle in
them belied her suggestion. "If the earth opened up at my feet,
I wouldn't move until I'd said this." Without averting his
eyes, he knelt in front of her and took her hand in his. It was
soft, warm, willing, and when he grasped it, he could hear her
heartbeat accelerating.*

"*Lois," Clark began, rain dripping from his hair into his
face, "will you marry me?"*

*As Clark brought out the intricate, beautifully designed diamond
engagement ring, he heard her gasp.*

###

His vision cleared, and he collapsed onto the couch he had been
standing in front of. Swallowing hard, he struggled past the
unease. Was that what was supposed to happen? But he hadn't
remembered anything real. He recognized it immediately as the
dream Lana described. He could feel the emotions welling inside
him as if it were real, but there was no way that was even
possible. It was no wonder she believed he was in love with Lois
after hearing what he said.

Only it was a dream. Scott gave him the impression that something
had happened to his memories. This couldn't be what he was
referring to. What difference would a dream about Lois make?

Regardless, Clark couldn't ignore this urge to help, even
knowing that Lois would not welcome it. Knowing he would likely
screw that up as well, he got ready to go find Scott and see what
was next.

***

Chapter 22

Her first view of the chateau that was to be her destination the
previous morning was from a distance. While she was unable to get
a good impression of its size from the angle, she could see that
it was positioned on the top of a bluff, resulting in a steep
drop-off on one side of the house. They traveled below it, along
a small river that was a tributary of the Hobbs River. Bare trees
covered much of the base of the bluff while the top was steep,
exposed rock.

A short while later, they pulled into the driveway of the house,
but evergreen trees obscured her view of it. Suddenly, the drive
opened up to a well-manicured lawn, allowing her to see the
enormity and grandeur of it. *Chateau* fully encompassed what
this house was.

Lex was right when he said it had a gothic feel to it -- it
looked like it was straight out of a novel. The dark grey brick
building looked more like a small castle, complete with a turret
rising to the sky from the corner of the house. It was set up on
a small hill with ivy growing several feet up on one side,
stretching almost to the roof in some places. Dormer windows
lined the top and broke up the dark and brooding roof.

The car continued along the drive and around to the back of the
house where Lois realized the bluff she'd seen on approach must
be located. Of course, what gothic home wouldn't be complete
without a cliff in close proximity? She also saw from this side
that the house had a basement that opened up to the rear. Behind
the house was a detached garage. What appeared to be a greenhouse
was further from the house, tucked up against the trees and
covered with lovely vines. It was very much like a fairy tale.
The whole scene made Lois uneasy.

She could only imagine the struggles that awaited her, but she
was done trying to play Lex's game and pretend nothing was
wrong. And while the memories that would have her believe his
charade still held a place in her mind, those of Clark prevented
her from accepting them. After she had awakened near the end of
the flight back to Metropolis, she simply glowered and refused to
respond to or look at Lex.

Still, he continued to speak to her as he had for the past two
months, though the false memories made it feel like years.
Regardless of his behavior now and during those months when she
thought they were a happy couple, she knew she could not trust
Lex to be sincere. It was a facade that would eventually fade
away, revealing the evil that lurked behind it.

She shifted in her seat to get a better look at the house from
the back as the car slowly pulled to a stop. Counting the
basement, it had four stories, the fourth being the roof level
with the dormer windows. More ivy covered the back of the house,
crawling up to a small balcony atop the second floor that was
flanked with turrets. Below the balcony was a patio complete with
a table and chairs, a small fire pit surrounded by a comfy
looking couch and chairs, and a luxurious pool that was surely
heated to be so inviting in this cold weather.

Distracted by both the beauty and haunting nature of the house,
Lois hadn't noticed the guards posted at strategic points until
now. They stood or walked about the grounds, looking ominous and
threatening. But the man that came up to open the door of the car
could only be described as a butler, from his attire to the way
he held himself and acknowledged Lex as the master of the house.

Lex got out first and reached back to grab Lois's arm. "Here we
are, Darling," he said as he helped her out.

She frowned as she looked around at the guards once more before
landing her glare on Lex. His smile seemed subdued, his eyes
determined, but his mouth relaxed. He seemed almost sad. The
strange mix of emotions that had been plaguing her for days
caused her stomach to roil once more.

"I'm sorry the circumstances of your arrival are less than
ideal," he said, "but we will be happy together once more."

"I will *never* be happy with you," she said, finally breaking
her silence. Her voice sounded brittle instead of confident as
she intended. But when his smile wavered, she thought perhaps it
had more of an effect than she would have otherwise.

He turned away from her abruptly and gave an instruction to the
waiting butler who quickly set himself to the task he was given.

As Lex began striding toward the house, Lois considered taking
advantage of the space she'd been given to make an escape.
Turning quickly in the opposite direction, however, revealed that
two of the guards had anticipated such a move and now blocked her
way. Reluctantly, she reversed and made to follow Lex to the
house instead.

Passing by what Lois had assumed would be their point of entry,
he walked to the patio and paused near the pool, clasping his
hands behind his back and looking out over the river valley below
as he said, "I've always loved this home. It is composed of
three large parcels and has several unique features including
this vista. So, when it became available, I immediately bought
it." He turned to look at her, his smile once more visible. His
eyes dropped to her abdomen as he said, "This will be the
perfect place to raise our little one." The look in his eyes
didn't hold any malice and even looked caring.

Lois shook her head and reminded herself of the truth of the
situation. She'd been kidnapped, her life replaced by this
nightmare. Her situation hadn't been deadly, but it had still
been perilous because she hadn't realized the deception. She
would not allow him to win. "I told you I'm not pregnant."

Lex turned back to the view. "That remains to be seen," he said
longingly. Before she could remind him of the circumstances
she'd explained, he turned and walked toward a wrought iron
spiral staircase that ascended to the balcony attached to the
main level. "Come with me, please."

As if she had a choice, she followed him up the stairs and to a
door that opened into a large living room, she was surprised to
find that the house appeared to be entirely furnished with
luxurious yet rustic decor. Neither the furniture nor the house
was anywhere near what she would have picked for herself... and
Clark. A tightening in her chest and throat prevented her from
saying anything as she followed Lex through the house.

He led her to a door on the second floor that she guessed would
reveal a suite of rooms. She wasn't sure if it was the master
suite or another bedroom as all the rooms she had looked into as
they came down the hall appeared to be suites. But she was
unprepared for what was behind the door and gasped as she
realized where she was standing.

A nursery. Matching the style of the rest of the house, it
contained a crib, changing table, and a chest of drawers that sat
to the side of the main room. Toward the back of the room, a
small sitting area was tucked beyond a wide doorway with plush
couches and a thick, fuzzy rug on the floor, all in neutral tones
for whatever child would grace it.

She stepped back and repeated her earlier claim, "I told you I
am not pregnant."

"And as I said, that remains to be seen. You cannot deny that
what took place those two months between you and I make it
plausible."

Oh! How she wanted to. Her hand came to her mouth as nausea
welled up in her. She closed her eyes to stem the guilt and anger
that sought to overwhelm her. She made the decision to leave the
room but didn't know where she would go. She was surprised to
see that the two guards who had blocked her escape outside now
stood in the hallway, and she stopped just short of bumping into
them.

"My apologies, Lois, but I know you only too well to allow you
to move freely about the house," Lex said from behind her. He
took her by the elbow and led her down the hall to a second
stairwell that led directly to the basement without an opening on
the main floor.

"Where are you taking me?" she asked, trying unsuccessfully to
jerk her arm free.

"To your rooms, of course," he replied.

Her *rooms* consisted of a suite located in the basement and
included a sitting area with an attached bedroom and small
kitchenette to one side as well as what she assumed was a
bathroom on the other side. Being toward the front of the house,
the entire suite was void of windows but seemed well enough lit.
She stood near the middle of the room, observing her new prison.

How long would she be confined to it?

"Mrs. Luthor. It's good to see you again."

When she whipped around to see who had addressed her that way,
she was surprised -- yet not -- to see Dr. Hightower enter the
room. His smile seemed pleasant, but his eyes didn't match,
giving her an eerie feeling. "What is he doing here?" she
asked, taking a step closer to Lex. Lois was surprised that it
made her feel oddly safer, but that was quickly dashed by his
answer.

"Two reasons," he began, turning to her and rubbing his hands
tenderly on her upper arms. "First, he will restore you to me."
His grip tightened, restraining her. "And second, he will
determine whether or not you carry our child."

"No!" Bringing her hands up in front of her face to break his
hold on her, she didn't see Hightower advancing behind her and
only realized he did so when she felt the needle stick her in the
shoulder.

She looked into Lex's face as it evolved into one of contrition.
"Lois, *everything* I do is because I love you," she heard him
say as he faded away and darkness slowly overtook her.

***

Clark checked the name of the hotel on the business card Scott
gave him. He looked back at the drab building and verified he was
in the right place. The black number mounted on the white frame
and centered on the red door was fading and falling off, but it
still managed to mark Clark's destination. He reached to knock
on the door.

Seconds felt like hours as he waited for the door to open, giving
Clark plenty of time to second guess his decision to come. He
kept going back and forth after remembering the dream. But
knowing that Lois was taken and that she would need some kind of
help, even if it was from him, compelled him to seek out Scott
and find out what was going on. When the door finally did open,
Clark was surprised to see concern written on the face of someone
who only hours ago had seemed so sure of what was to come.

Scott looked weary and nervous, fiddling with what looked like a
musical symbol tied around his wrist with a leather strap. "I
wasn't sure you would come," Scott said, gesturing for Clark to
enter.

Clark harrumphed. "I'm not sure I should have," he said as he
crossed the threshold into the tiny hotel room.

"Me either." Scott's frown deepened, making Clark wonder what
had caused such a change from the earlier confidence he'd seen
on the trail.

Clark gave the trepidation Scott now showed only a moment's
consideration before reminding himself that he was here to see
how he might help and maybe ease his guilty conscience in the
process. He took a seat in the tiny chair near the window. "Just
lay it out there," he said.

Scott sat down on the bed facing Clark. "It's a trap." He
rested his elbows on his knees and leaned his head up to look
directly at Clark. "Lex wants me to make sure you go to Lois and
when you do, he plans to kill you."

"Excuse me?" Clark asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Remember when I said that someone messed with your memories?"
Clark nodded, and Scott continued, "About two months ago, you
and Lois were kidnapped. Your memories were changed and lives
rearranged. A few days ago, I helped Lois recover her memories.
We came to help you recover yours, but that idea was stopped in
its tracks, literally, and now Lois is back with Lex Luthor who
wants me to encourage you to come after her so that he can kill
you."

"*The* Lex Luthor." Clark could feel his mouth drop open. Lex
Luthor was a wealthy businessman in Metropolis. Clark wouldn't
have been able to pick him out of a line up. Scott simply nodded
in response. "Because I ruined Lois's life?"

"No," Scott said, shaking his head. "That never happened."
Scott breathed out slowly and turned serious eyes to Clark, his
eyebrows slightly raised as he said, "Because you are his arch
nemesis, Superman."

"*Superman*?" Clark repeated in disbelief. "That's
impossible."

"I know it seems impossible, especially with your powers
disabled, but--"

"How do you even know any of this?" Clark interrupted.

Scott took a deep breath before he continued. "I, uh, used to
work for Lex. I was there when it happened."

Clark could only frown as surprise and confusion prevented him
from putting words together.

"It's true," Scott said as he put his head down, fiddling with
the charm tied to his wrist. "I was part of it. But I'm not
now." He paused to look up and met Clark's eyes directly. "As
I've already had to explain to Lois, I assisted in all of it,
from changing the memories, to kidnapping you and Lois." Scott
continued, making direct eye contact with Clark, even as he
balled his hands into fists. "I know now what kind of monster
Lex is. I have lived every day for a while now riddled with guilt
over the role I played in all of this. But I made a promise. And
the only thing I could think to do was use what I know to undo it
and help put everything back as it should be."

"How do you expect me to believe that?" Clark stood and started
pacing. "How can I believe *any* of this?"

"Is there any part of it you can believe?"

Clark grunted a weak laugh. "That you and Lois came here and
that she's gone now." And the only reason he could believe that
was because he'd seen it with his own eyes. Lex Luthor was a
name he recognized, but that the third richest man in the world
would ever have any reason to want to kill him was unbelievable.
Even more ridiculous was the idea that Clark was Superman. "How
can any of the rest of that be true?"

"The procedure that was done to change memories has a key, or in
your case, several keys." Scott chuckled, and Clark wondered
what was funny. "Your... stronger brain rejected much of it, and
so we kept repeating it until it was done."

His brow furrowed further. He just couldn't believe what Scott
was saying with everything he knew to be reality. It must have
shown on his face.

"I know it seems unbelievable, but it's true. Did you listen to
the CD I gave you? The keys are all songs, and if any of those on
the CD were the right ones, it should have unlocked some of the
memories that were changed."

"Well, it didn't," Clark said a little more harshly than he
intended as he stood and walked to look out the window. Letting
his irritation with this whole charade get the best of him, he
added, "Probably because none of that is real."

"You didn't remember *anything*?"

The subdued tone Scott used brought Clark's head around to see a
matching look of disappointment. Clark shook his head and turned
back to the window. "Nothing but a dream I had that's ruined
enough already."

"What dream?" Scott asked with unmistakable hope.

"A dream in which I asked Lois to marry me." He rubbed his hand
over his face, reliving the very real emotions that had come with
the dream. Fresh guilt over what he'd put Lana through in all
this mixed with the misery that continually permeated his entire
being.

"That wasn't a dream."

"Yes, it was. There is *no way* that happened. She *hates* me.
The only thing I ever did for her was ruin her life." Clark
turned at the sound of Scott rifling through a bag. He walked
back to the chair and sat. "Besides, I'd have to know a woman
long enough before I would ever ask her to marry me. When would
that have even happened?"

Clark grimaced. Lois still lived in Metropolis, her appearances
on TV as a reporter could confirm that, whereas he'd been moving
around the country from small town to small town trying to get
and keep a job ever since he ruined her life. Well, it wasn't
completely ruined if she'd made it as a reporter on TV,
something for which he was grateful.

Scott turned toward Clark with something in his hand, the
earnestness in his face catching Clark by surprise. "I think you
should see this." He sat up straighter as Scott stepped forward
just enough to pass the object to Clark who looked at it with
narrowed eyes and a furrowed brow.

A photograph -- wallet-sized, still relatively pristine, with
just a small crease on the corner.

As Clark brought the picture closer to him, he realized it was a
picture of himself.

With Lois.

A beautiful smile on Lois's perfect face was aimed right at him,
and his eyes were locked on to hers. He was holding the fingers
of her left hand to his mouth, and his lips were pressing a kiss
to them. Expertly centered in the shot was a beautiful and
intricately designed diamond ring -- the same ring from his dream
-- on her ring finger. Flipping the picture over, he found a
date, November 18, 1995, written on the back in handwriting that
looked remarkably like his own.

Clark stared dumbfounded for a moment before coming to his
senses. "This must be a fake," he said, shaking his head.

When he looked up, Scott held out his hand, holding a brown
leather wallet, probably the source of the picture. He took it
and opened it to find his driver's license looking up at him.
Only it was a New Troy license, not the Kansas one he currently
carried in the wallet in his back pocket. Clark pulled his own
wallet out and retrieved his current license, the Kansas one.
Holding the two next to each other, he realized the photos were
identical. Yet he'd never heard of the address listed on the New
Troy license: 344 Clinton Street.

Discarding his own wallet and driver's license on the table
beside the chair and again shaking his head in confusion, he
continued to thumb through the contents of this wallet. A health
insurance card. A couple of credit cards. A folded piece of paper
with the words "I love you" written on one side and another
date, October 22, 1995, on the other side, both in obviously
feminine cursive. Tucked behind the driver's license was another
picture of Lois, wrinkled as if it had been shoved in the wallet
for some time, a head shot, this one dated merely September 1995
in his handwriting.

Clark's mind tried to put the pieces together, but they just
didn't make any sense. He *knew* that ever since he met Lois,
there had been nothing but trouble. He *knew* that after ruining
her career, he bounced from job to job whenever someone found out
what had happened. He *knew* that he'd been talking about Lois
in his sleep, and now he *knew* what that dream had been like.

But now, someone was telling him that this dream of his wasn't a
dream. Was that why it had felt so real? And this wallet, filled
with things he'd never seen before covered in his distinctive
handwriting, must have been his.

And the picture of Lois... The picture of him *with* Lois...

"Where did you get this?" he asked quietly, fearing the
answer.

"I was there, remember? I followed all the directions Luthor
gave me to take care of yours and Lois's stuff. But not on this.
I... couldn't, for some reason. And when I... made my promise, I
went back and got it. So that I could give it back to you."

Clark stuffed the contents back in the wallet only to find that
there was something blocking the cards. Pulling the pocket open,
he saw what he thought was a shiny coin. As he shook the coin
into his hand, he felt the blood drain from his face when he saw
instead the ring that Lois had been wearing in the picture. The
very same ring from his dream. She must have said yes to be
wearing it in the picture. "How...?"

"Luthor took it off when he kidnapped Lois the first time."
Clark hadn't realized he'd spoken that thought out loud.

Clark set the wallet down next to his on the table and rubbed his
face with both of his hands. The sincerity in Scott's voice made
a small part of him want to believe what he was being told, but
it was still fought back by the guilt he'd been carrying around
for years. But had he been carrying it around for years?

"If what you say is true..." He hung his head and shook it.
"But I'm *not* Superman." An awkward silence followed while
Clark's thoughts jumped everywhere.

He heard a long, heavy breath escape Scott. "Look, Clark," he
started, "It *is* true. But I can't ask you to risk your life
going into a set-up, especially when you have so little reason to
believe any of what I'm saying."

At this Clark looked up, finally understanding the change he'd
observed in Scott's demeanor. "What will you do?"

"I... I'm not sure yet, but it has to happen soon." Scott
stood up and began putting the displaced items back into his bag.
Clark noticed that the wallet that Scott said was his didn't go
back in the bag. "I promised I would stop this, and I won't
give up until I have."

Clark sat motionless in the chair, watching Scott pack his bags,
not really seeing him while he considered his options. He could
leave, walk away from all this nonsense. Go back to his life. The
one that had fallen apart because of some dream. The life that
was miserable because he was so obviously not where he was
supposed to be.

Or he could go with Scott, try to help save Lois and put back
whatever was out of place. But he'd be walking into a trap that
he couldn't even begin to imagine in which there was a good
chance someone was going to try to kill him, even though he
clearly wasn't the person Lex wanted dead. He'd probably screw
it up somehow, though, like he did everything else.

But maybe, just maybe, he could help. Maybe he could make up for
everything he'd done to ruin Lois's life. Maybe she'd forgive
him, and he'd finally be able to move on.

He stood up from the chair. "Scott," he said, suddenly feeling
sure of something for the first time in a very long time. "I'll
go with you."

***

Jimmy sat at his desk just outside Perry's office, looking over
his notes from the interviews he'd conducted over the past three
days when his phone rang.

"Olsen," he answered it, setting his pen down to rub his hand
over his face in exhaustion. Waking up early this morning was
necessary, but now it was catching up with him.

"Mr. Hubert," he greeted. "What can I do for you?"

Jimmy sat up suddenly, knocking over his coffee cup. "She did?
When?" he asked as he sopped up the coffee with some scratch
paper he had nearby.

"Just now? How?" He pushed the wet papers into the trash can
sitting at the end of his desk. "You were singing?" Jimmy
stilled. "What song?"

Jimmy's eyes grew wide. "Mr. Hubert, I'll call you back as
soon as I can," he said in what he hoped was a calm manner.

As he ended the call, he pushed the papers around on his desk
until he found the right one and then dialed the Mayfields'
number. "David, it's Jimmy Olsen. Was the name of the song you
heard *Miss Otis Regrets*?" he asked. "Can I talk to her
then?"

Jimmy continued to shuffle the papers around on his desk as he
waited. "Alexia, was the name of the song you heard *Miss Otis
Regrets*?... If you heard it again, would you recognize it?...
All right, I'll see if I can find a copy for you to listen
to."

***

"Chief!" Perry looked up at the sound, but before he could say
anything, Jimmy continued, "I think I'm onto something here. Do
you have any Nat King Cole?"

"Probably, but don't tell Elvis," Perry answered. "Why?"

"Do you have a song called *Miss Otis Regrets*?" Jimmy's eyes
were wide, his hands fidgeting. It was obviously he was only
barely able to contain his excitement.

Perry slowly rose from his seat and began looking at a shelf full
of CDs. "I think so. *Why*?" he emphasized the word. That kid
was going to have to share some of the back story, or Perry was
going to hold the CD just out of Jimmy's reach when he found
it.

"Three people have talked to me about remembering the procedure
in the last few days. Two of them remembered when they heard that
song." Jimmy stood, looking over Perry's shoulder at the CDs.

"And you think the song did it?" Perry raised one eyebrow.

"It's what they all have in common," he explained.

A knock at the door drew their attention, and a messenger handed
an envelope to Jimmy. Perry went back to looking through the CDs
while Jimmy tore open the envelope and shuffled through the
contents.

"Chief, take a look at these." Jimmy sounded both astonished
and triumphant. "The sketch artist sent over the faces everyone
described."

Perry took the stack of pictures and flipped through all of the
similarly drawn faces of a familiar person. "Great shades of
Elvis! That's Hightower!"

"I gotta see if that song was playing for the third person.
I'll call her if you'll get it set up."

Perry squatted to get a better view of the lower shelf before
coming up with the disc. "*Miss Otis Regrets. * Right here," he
said. As Perry turned on the small stereo and inserted the CD,
Jimmy picked up the conference phone and dialed a number.
Excitement bubbled inside him. It had been a long time since
Perry had been part of an investigation.

"Hello?" said the voice on the phone.

"Alexia?" Jimmy asked.

"Yes?" A muffled noise could be heard in the background.

"This is Jimmy Olsen. I found that song. Do you have a minute to
listen to it?"

"Sure. Let me turn this off." A click followed by relative
silence was heard.

Jimmy nodded to Perry, who pushed the button to start the song.

The strains of the song filled the room, trumpets building
tension, followed by the smooth voice of Nat King Cole as he
began to croon.

*Miss Otis Regrets*

*She's unable to lunch today.*

Jimmy eyed Perry with a look that was hopeful and nervous. It had
been years since Perry had even listened to this song. It wasn't
one that was easily recognizable.

*Madam,*

*Miss Otis Regrets*

*She's unable to lunch today.*

*She is sorry to be delayed,*

*But last evening down at lover's lane she strayed.*

*Madam,*

*Miss Otis Regrets*

*She's unable to lunch today.*

When the trumpets flared up again, Alexia shouted, "That's
it!"

Jimmy clapped his hands together in victory. "I knew it! Thanks,
Alexia, I'll get back to you soon." Jimmy ended the call.

"Wanna fill me in, Jimmy?" Perry asked while Jimmy celebrated
this information with several hand gestures Perry didn't
recognize.

"Yeah, sorry, Chief." Jimmy composed himself, switching from
excited kid to hard-working reporter. "Okay so yesterday when I
interviewed David Mayfield, he remembered the procedure, but no
one knew why. This morning I got a call from Ronald Simmons to
meet earlier than expected, and his wife told me about the song
she was singing when he remembered. I was going over my notes
just now and got a call from Hal Hubert whose wife suddenly
remembered. He, too, was singing, and it was the same song
Simmons heard. So, I thought if it were also the same song
Mayfield heard, we just have to figure out where it came--"
Jimmy stopped abruptly and shook his head.

In the silence, Perry heard the next song on the CD begin.

*You'll never miss the water*

*Till your well runs dry*

*Till your well runs dry*

*You'll never miss Joe Turner till he says goodbye*

"Jimmy?" Perry waved his hand in front of Jimmy's face when he
received no response. A frown crossed Jimmy's face that deepened
the longer he was trapped in this trance. He stumbled, and Perry
moved to help him sit down, though Jimmy still seemed unaware of
him.

Perry watched as various emotions transformed Jimmy's face. It
seemed to pass just as quickly as it started. And though it
seemed to last a long time, it was merely a few minutes before
Jimmy looked up at him. Perry had never seen his eyes so wide or
his face so pale.

"Chief... Oh my God..."

***

Chapter 23

*Darling tell me do you love me*

*For what I am*

*Or for what I*

*May someday be*

*Or do you love me*

*Really love me*

*Because you love me*

After letting his boss at the Tribune know that he needed a few
days off for an emergency, Clark and Scott stopped at the mall to
purchase all the Nat King Cole music they could find as well as a
portable CD player. They then headed to the airport to fly to
Metropolis. Scott assured him that listening to the songs would
eventually release more memories.

They sat with an empty seat between them on the plane as it
carried only half the number of passengers it could hold. Clark
preferred it that way. Flying just wasn't his style, and he'd
have been even more anxious if the plane had been packed with
people bumping into each other, bouncing and swaying with every
jolt of the plane. At least on an empty plane he could close his
eyes when it became too much and pretend something else was
causing the movement.

*Blue gardenia*

*Now I'm alone with you*

*And I am, oh, so blue*

*She has tossed us aside*

After hours of listening, it just didn't seem like anything was
going to happen. And that made Clark wonder if his decision to
give Scott the benefit of the doubt had been a bit impetuous.
Here he was on a plane to Metropolis, on his way to the house of
someone who wanted him dead to help someone who didn't want him
there. He *must* be mad.

Another jerk from the turbulence brought his attention back to
the plane. He glanced at Scott to find him dozing with his head
leaning against the window. Clark chose the aisle so that he
could straighten his legs when he needed, another aspect that was
made possible by the small number of passengers and one that also
helped him maintain his calm. He closed his eyes and tried to
relax.

*That's my girl*

*Take a look at her, she belongs to me*

*Yes, that's my girl*

*Hands off, don't touch*

While he listened, he considered the wallet and photos with his
own handwriting on them. They were compelling pieces of evidence
that Scott was being truthful. And his conscience would feel some
relief by making up for what he'd done in the past. In addition,
he couldn't ignore that there was nothing friendly in the way
that man had taken Lois, and she likely needed help from someone.
He'd always been the type of person to help in any way he
could.

"Excuse me, sir," said a polite but annoyed voice.

Clark opened his eyes to see the flight attendant making his way
down the aisle. The flight attendant nodded his head in the
direction of Clark's foot blocking the walkway.

"Sorry," he said, quickly pulling the offending foot back and
tucking it under the seat in front of him.

Clark took the opportunity to replace the CD that had just ended
with the next before repositioning himself. He attempted to shift
into a more comfortable position, but only a child could find
such small seats anything but cramped.

*Brush those tears from your eyes*

As the next song started, he glanced around the cabin of the
plane, taking into account the other passengers but quickly
realized that was a mistake as he began to feel dizzy and sick to
his stomach. The passengers on the plane became blurry, forcing
Clark to close his eyes. He took a few deep breaths before
everything before him morphed into something he'd never seen
before.

*And try to realize*

*That the ache in my heart is for you*

###

*May 21, 1995*

*He was standing next to her, leaning over her, filled with fear.
Lois felt warm to his touch, but there was no movement...
anywhere. She had to be okay, he couldn't let anything happen to
her. He never should have agreed to this.*

*He grasped her hand as he demanded, "Live." He shifted a
little and gently placed his hand under her neck. Without
thinking, he leaned forward to put his mouth over hers. He
breathed gently in and backed away from her, searching for some
sign she was going to be alright.*

*Still nothing.*

"*Come on, Lois," he said gently, pleading. "Come back to
me." In his peripheral vision, he saw the world crashing in slow
motion into tiny pieces around him, fear of having to continue
life without her consuming him. "Fight, Lois! Come on, fight."
His voice wavered between demanding and desperate. How could he
lose her? She was everything to him.*

*He leaned forward and breathed into her again, tenderly,
worrying he would never again feel her return his kiss. How had
he ever let her convince him this was a good idea? "Don't you
die on me, Lois." He had to stay strong, had to will her out of
this. She had to wake up. "Now come on, don't give up." He
couldn't give up either. She would come out of this. "Come on,
breathe Lois! Breathe!"*

*Still she didn't move.*

*His breath caught as his head sagged. He was at a loss for what
to do next. A future that didn't include her flitted across his
eyes, and he felt a sharp sense of loss. He needed her. More than
he'd ever needed anything in his life. He would give his life
for her... just like she had done for him.*

*Her chest suddenly rose with the effort to draw in that first
breath, and his head came up quickly as she coughed through those
first glorious breaths. "Okay, okay," he kept repeating,
feeling that sense of loss melt away. The greatest hope he'd
ever felt took its place, filling him completely.*

*He reached around to help her sit up, but instead found himself
cradling her in his arms. He spoke soothingly, reassuringly,
relieved, "Yeah that's it. Okay." He held her close, unable to
look away from her beloved face, knowing he was forever hers.*

"*I heard you calling," she breathed out, opening her eyes to
look into his. "I heard you calling," she repeated more
strongly. Never in his whole life had any sound ever meant so
much to him.*

###

Clark leaned forward and waited for the fog to clear. "Whoa,"
he said under his breath, shaking his head gently. Some of what
Lana had heard him say was in this... dream? Memory?

He saved her, brought her back from the clutches of death. He
belonged to her, he would do everything in his power to prevent
her from ever feeling any pain of any kind. He would give his
life for her. And she had done the same?

Was this another dream? Or had he loved her? Why didn't he know?
Why couldn't he remember?

"Scott?" he said as he reached to nudge his unlikely ally.

Scott's eyes opened, and he looked from the window to Clark.
"Are we about to land?" he asked in a groggy voice.

"I have no idea." Clark looked passed him to the window.

Scott rubbed his hand over his face and stretched as much as a
person could on an airplane. When he realized Clark was still
looking at him, his eyebrows rose as he said, "What is it?"

"When did Lois almost die?" Clark asked bluntly.

Scott frowned and shook his head slightly. "I don't know. Did
you remember something?"

"I don't know. It seemed more like a dream, like the first
one." Clark sat back in his seat, making use of the headrest. He
frowned as he ran through the scene again. "She was lying
somewhere and... not breathing. I thought she was dead, but I
talked to her, helped her, told her to come back to me... and she
did."

"Was anyone else there?" Scott sat forward, curiosity on his
face. "Did you see anything else?"

"No... I don't know." Clark hadn't noticed any of the
surroundings, just Lois, in his arms. Closing his eyes, he
strained to bring the rest of the room into focus, but it
wouldn't show itself. "I only saw Lois."

"Well, it's a start." Scott shrugged. "Keep listening. Once
we reach Metropolis, we'll talk about what we'll do then.
That'll give me more time to think about it."

Clark nodded and put the headphones back over his ears, skeptical
still, but less so than before. It could have been a dream. But
the feelings felt so real, so... authentic. He was aware of her
figure in his arms, could tell how light she was, could feel the
warmth of her against him.

*There goes my heart, there goes the one I love*

*There goes the girl I wasn't worthy of*

*There goes my happiness, it couldn't be*

*There goes somebody else in place of me*

Clark closed his eyes and forced himself to focus on the scene.
Rubbing his thumb and index finger together, he realized he could
still feel her face from when he'd put his hand on her chin. He
could still feel her smooth skin. Her soft hair. Her delicate
fingers. How was that possible?

He shook himself. No, it wasn't possible. Clark ruined her life,
and Lois Lane wanted nothing to do with him.

***

Stretching her arms above her head, Lois rolled to her side
toward the bright sun filtering in through the curtains covering
the west facing windows. Her headache seemed to have disappeared,
and she no longer found the sunlight to be so uncomfortably
bright. Thankfully, the winter sun set early and while the day
had been a long one, it still wasn't over.

Yawning as she sat up, she wondered what they would be having for
dinner this evening and whether Scott would be here in time to
eat with them. The anniversary party a few days ago had ended
with Lex and Lois traveling to this wonderfully secluded home
where they had spent the past few days relaxing together. But
Lois was looking forward to returning to work soon, eager to get
started on her next story.

A chilly afternoon breeze swept in through the curiously open
window and with it voices. Lois rose from the bed and walked to
the open window, looking out at the balcony. Not seeing anyone
there, Lois opened the door to let herself out onto it. Another
breeze blew past and Lois shivered, wondering once again why the
window had been left open and grabbed the blanket draped over the
chair near the door.

She walked to the railing and peered over the edge to see an
unfamiliar woman with a coffee cup in her hand, sitting in the
patio chair at the table across from Lex. The brown-haired woman
suddenly sat forward and leaned closer to Lex, causing a
narrowing of Lois's eyes. Lois could see her lips moving as she
spoke but couldn't hear any words. Lex nodded to whatever she'd
said.

They both leaned back in their chairs, and Lex looked up. A smile
stretched across his face as his eyes landed on her, and the
jealousy she felt moments before cooled.

"Lois, Darling! I'm glad to see you up!" Lex called as he
stood up and motioned to her. "Won't you come down and meet our
guest? I was hoping to introduce you before she needed to
leave."

"I'll be down in a minute," she said, nodding feebly, unsure
whether she wanted to meet this mysterious guest, yet compelled
to find out who she was as quickly as possible.

Lois returned to the bedroom in search of shoes and a sweater all
the while wondering who this woman could possibly be. She found
her shoes tucked slightly under the bench at the end of the bed
but was unable to put one of them on. Reaching in, she found a
napkin shoved into the toe of the shoe. If it hadn't been so
neatly folded, she might have missed the writing on the inside.
She didn't recall having written on a napkin or putting it in
her shoe, but instead of discarding it, she tucked it into her
back pocket to look at later.

Once her shoes were on, she quickly descended the grand spiral
staircase at the front of the house all the way to the basement
floor. As she stepped from the last stair, she faced the French
doors of the family room that opened to the patio, but it was the
voices drifting from the hall to the left that drew her
attention. She paused momentarily and when she realized it was
her husband's voice she'd heard, along with that woman's, she
quietly stepped toward the sound, listening in.

"You're sure he's coming tonight?" the mystery woman asked.
Was it Scott they were talking about?

"Absolutely," Lex answered. "I already spoke with Scott about
it. They'll arrive before the day is over." So, they were
talking about Scott. She smiled and began to turn back toward the
French doors.

"And what if *he* doesn't come?" Lois stopped as she frowned
at the way this woman sneered the word 'he.' How could anyone
think Scott was anything other than the nicest guy? He was a
great friend, supportive, helpful, dependable. He made her job at
LNN better by simply being her cameraman.

"That's incredibly unlikely because the fool has never been
able to stay away from Lois. Not until I did something about
it." Lois's mind raced. Lex and Scott were good friends. So,
who were they talking about? Was someone coming with Scott? "But
after the last few days, it's clear that he has come back to
cause trouble."

"Well, I for one look forward to the end of this," the mystery
woman added. "That infiltrating miscreant shouldn't be allowed
to roam freely. He's a danger to everyone."

Lois searched her memory for someone who couldn't stay away from
her, someone who would want to cause trouble, but other than the
various criminals she'd exposed over the years, nothing stood
out.

"True. And no longer will you have to fear. After tonight,
he'll be a distant memory." Lois's eyes went wide as she
caught the meaning of what Lex was saying.

The scraping of chairs brought Lois quickly out of her thoughts,
and she quickly retreated to the family room. She calmed her
breathing and opened the French doors to the patio before Lex and
their guest reached them.

As they came in, she pasted a smile on her face and took Lex's
outstretched hand, leaning forward to receive the kiss he planted
on her cheek. "Lex, who is our guest?" she asked, nodding to
the woman in question.

"This is Dr. Florence Montgomery, a colleague of mine," Lex
introduced her. "Flo, my wife, Lois."

"Nice to meet you," Lois said, nodding to the woman without
releasing her hold on Lex. "What brings you out this way?"

"She was just dropping off some equipment for me," Lex answered
for her.

"Yes, well, I need to be going now." She ducked her head and
began quickly ascending the steps to the main floor.

"I must apologize for her behavior," Lex began, a frown on his
face as he watched Flo leave. "She is quite awkward and her...
companion, Lowell, wasn't able to come with her today." He
shook his head and sighed before turning to face Lois, enfolding
her in his arms. "Are you feeling better?" he asked, his eyes
exploring hers, his voice sensuous.

"Much." She smiled, but it faltered as she recalled the words
she'd heard moments earlier.

"What is it, Darling?" Lex asked, his frown matching hers.

"I overheard you talking about someone coming tonight," she
admitted. "With Scott?" She searched his eyes.

Lex took a deep breath before beginning. "Yes, I was planning on
telling you soon." He released her from his embrace and led her
to sit on the plush couch. Lois could tell by his behavior, and
the conversation she'd overheard that something unpleasant was
afoot. "I was hoping to shield you from all of this, but it
seems I have no choice now." He took both of her hands in his
and sighed.

"What's going on, Lex?" His tone was unnerving her, and she
couldn't keep it from letting it show.

"We came to the chateau so quickly after the party because I
received some distressing news about a person who has been
attempting to take you from me." Lex squeezed her hands. "He
planned to come to our house that evening, and so we came here
instead."

Lois's eyes went wide. His insistence that they take a vacation
seemed impulsive at the time, but he'd played it off as wanting
some time alone with her. Now it made sense. They hadn't even
packed anything, leaving the party and coming straight here.

"He has found out where we are again." A small gasp escaped
Lois, but he continued, his eyes locked on hers, "I am through
running from him. Tonight, I will stand up to him. He will not
bother us again."

Lois's heart leapt at his protectiveness, but the memory of his
comments to Dr. Montgomery and her own concern for what he would
do brought her back to reality. "Who is it?" she asked, needing
to know the identity of this person who wanted to ruin her
happiness.

"Clark Kent."

***

Part 4 -- "...but in rising every time we fall." -- Confucius

***

Chapter 24

Clark wasn't sure if the warm front hadn't made it this far
east or if it was the increase in latitude that accounted for the
cooler temperatures, but the weather changed quickly as he and
Scott made their way from the airport to a small diner in the
small town near the chateau a few hours north of Metropolis.
Cirrus clouds obscured the sky when they landed in Metropolis
just before dinner, but now the clouds had thickened and the
temperature had dropped significantly since then. Perhaps a cold
front was approaching. Clark tried not to let the ominous weather
bring him down.

Clark had "remembered" another fragment during the long car
ride. Scott was able to confirm that the story about the
Messenger and Dr. Platt had gone differently than he'd known for
the past two years -- no, two months. And while it was nice to
have realized the main thing that had been plaguing him this
whole time wasn't real, his guilt was still there and was
further fueled knowing that somehow, he'd been tricked into this
whole mess.

Now they sat, quietly eating a meal before heading to the
chateau. Clark was still wearing his headphones. Scott had
suggested they wait until the middle of the night since Lex was
expecting them to arrive before the end of the day. Scott was
familiar with the layout of the house, including the countless
secret passages, but having the element of surprise, however
small, would help. And they needed all the help they could get.

*And now the purple dusk of twilight time*

*Steals across the meadows of my heart*

*High up in the sky the little stars climb*

*Always reminding me that we're apart*

At first, Clark didn't mind listening to the Nat King Cole
songs. They were catchy, feel good songs. Even the depressing
songs made you feel good inside. Now, they were starting to run
together, and he couldn't remember whether or not he'd heard
them before.

Clark shoveled another spoonful of the cheese soup he ordered
into his mouth. He wasn't even hungry, but Scott insisted they
get some nourishment. Scott was also still insisting that Clark
was Superman, but that his powers had somehow been disabled. It
was too difficult to keep from rolling his eyes during that part
of the conversation. But the soup was good, and their wait was
almost over. Shortly, they would make their way to the house
where Lois was held captive.

He picked up another spoonful of soup but was stopped by the
beginning of the next song.

*A blossom fell from off a tree*

This time when his vision began to cloud and his stomach began to
turn, he recognized what was happening.

*It settled softly on the lips you turned to me*

Each experience had been the same, and now he relished the idea
that he might understand more, even if it was only a smidgeon of
the truth. Thankful to be sitting, Clark dropped his spoon back
into the bowl and leaned his head onto his tented hands.

###

*May 26, 1995*

*Clark heard a delighted breath escape Lois as they peeked
through the mist. Up here, they were surrounded only by the stars
in the sky and the clouds beneath them. He watched her as she
looked around, her eyes wide and her mouth slightly open, taking
it all in. She held tightly to him, one arm around his chest, the
other over his shoulder, and he relished the feel of her. Another
breath and he realized something. "You cold?" he asked.*

*She looked up to his face. "A little," she said, her eyes
dancing.*

"*Here." He reached behind him with his free arm to grab at the
edge of his cape and draped it around her, then he did the same
with his other arm. Now, she was neatly cocooned, pressed closely
against him.*

*She looked up at the stars in awe. He was sure she'd never seen
that many before, and he felt honored to be the one to share this
experience with her. "It's so beautiful," she breathed.*

"*I used to come up here a lot by myself," he explained, "and
just... drift. Not part of the stars, not part of the earth, not
really knowing where I fit in." He met her eyes then, their
faces inches apart. "Until I met you."*

"*Oh, Clark," she said, moved by what he'd said.*

"*Lois," he cut in before she could say another word, "I'll
wait for you." And he knew he would. Forever if he had to. He
looked intently into her eyes, wanting her to see the honesty in
his words. "I'll wait for you as long as you need."*

*Not once did she look away, and it meant the world to him for
her to look at him as if he, Clark, was the only one that
mattered.*

"*I want you to know I love you," she said, making his heart
flip in his chest. "And you're not alone anymore."*

*He moved slowly, closing in on her lips as his eyes flicked to
hers. His body tingled at the freedom he now felt to express
himself to her, knowing he could share all of himself without
hiding. He saw the relief, desire, love that he felt mirrored in
them. She moved forward to meet him, and when their lips finally
touched, he knew he would not have to wait as long as he
originally thought.*

###

He raised his head and stretched his hands out in front of him
before bringing them back to rest on the top of his head with his
fingers interlocked.

"Clark?" he heard Scott say.

Clark nodded and said, "Give me a minute." He was having a hard
time believing what he was imagining... Remembering? He could
feel her in his arms, pressed up against him. She said she loved
him. Moreover, they seemed to be in the clouds. And was he
wearing a cape?

"Well," he started, "That one makes your claim that I'm--"
he looked around and mouthed the word *Superman*, "--seem
more... possible."

"That's great!" Scott's barely contained excitement made his
voice a little loud, but when Clark looked around the diner, no
one else seemed to notice.

"I think I was flying," he explained, "with Lois." Clark
would be glad when this was all over, and he could stop feeling a
tad crazy. "You sure you have no idea how to restore *my
powers*?" Clark asked making air-quotes with his fingers, still
unable to take it too seriously. Even if he was Superman, it
wouldn't help them much if he didn't have any powers.

"No," he said, "but I wish I did." Scott paused to take a sip
of his drink. "You know, it's okay if you don't want to do
this. I can rustle up some guys who can help me get her out of
there instead."

"If it's me he wants," Clark said solemnly, "it's me he'll
get." He didn't really understand why he felt like this was
something he *had* to do. Originally, he chalked it up to having
nothing to lose, but after considering the few *memories* he'd
had, he was beginning to believe there was something else pulling
him there.

Scott simply nodded. "Don't worry, once we get Lois out of that
house, I'm sure she'll be able to figure it out."

"What makes you say that?" Clark asked in disbelief.

"Because even though I only really knew her for a couple of
months, I know she is probably the most brilliant investigative
reporter on the planet..." His words faded, and his face fell
slightly. "Well, when she is aware there is a problem," he
finished.

Clark huffed.

"Sorry we didn't have enough time to get you through all the
songs."

"Sorry my brain was so hard to wipe."

Scott laughed at that one, but then his face turned serious.
"Look, Hightower doesn't know we're on to his keys. If Lex had
him reset Lois, the same key might work."

"So, I have to *sing* to her if she doesn't remember
anything?" Scott had no idea what he was asking of Clark, no way
of knowing just how bad of an idea that was.

"Yeah, it was *Paper Moon* that worked the first--"

"Do I have to *sing* it?" Clark interrupted, thrusting his hand
forward, with a look directed at Scott that he hoped got across
just how necessary it was for him to *not* sing.

Scott stared at him with raised eyebrows for a moment before
answering with a teasing smile. "I don't know, really. You
could try just saying the words and see if that works." He
shrugged, and Clark tried to ignore the grin that the other man
wasn't hiding as well as he would have liked.

"Can we go now?" Clark asked when Scott was no longer able to
suppress his chuckling. With a quick shove backward, Clark stood
up and made his way toward the door, thankful that Scott would be
waiting outside while he went in to find Lois.

***

January 24, 1996

Clark Kent was just a blip in her past, someone who came in from
nowhere, made a horrible mistake, and then left as quickly as
he'd arrived, leaving her career in ruins. Luckily, Lex had been
present during the aftermath and helped Lois secure her new job
at LNN. Now, she only remembered her anger at his inexperience
and what it had cost her but hardly anything else about him.

Everything had seemed so fine and perfect. Why was this happening
now? Of course, according to Lex, it wasn't just happening now.
She was merely unaware of the situation because he had kept it
hidden from her, preferring to take care of it himself instead of
giving her cause to worry. Lex painted Clark as an obsessed
stalker purposely attempting to make her life more difficult.
Apparently, Clark had been following Lois for years, and Lex had
thwarted many of his attempts to do something to her.

She was conflicted. On the one hand, it was nice to have a knight
in shining armor to swoop in and take care of you. Lex's
sincerity and protectiveness were endearing, and she was glad she
had someone like him on her side. On the other hand, Lois was
perfectly capable of fighting her own battles. How had Lex been
able to keep this from her for so long? She didn't understand
any of this, and it made her angry.

When he finally confessed what he had heard, she couldn't
believe it. Somehow, Clark believed she was in danger and had
tried to rescue her multiple times. When Lois asked why Lex
didn't call the police, he explained that he did, but they
weren't able to do anything without evidence of a threat. Lex
felt his only choice was to do something himself and do what was
necessary to steer Clark in the right direction.

Lex was adamant that her help in the matter was necessary. By
playing along with the charade, she would be able to convince
Clark to follow her so that Lex could confront him and end this
behavior. He was unsure what time Clark would come for her, but
he was certain it would be tonight. After Lex told her that Clark
only wanted to take her from him, that she would be perfectly
safe, some of her nerves calmed down. She was not terribly
worried; being in danger was something she was somewhat used to.
And Lois trusted his plan.

Lex had left her alone in the guest suite in the basement of the
house after taking her wedding rings for safe keeping. This is
where Lex would "keep" her until Clark arrived to "free" her.
It was more like a small apartment than a suite, complete with a
kitchenette. The lack of windows made it difficult to keep track
of time, and the waiting became excruciatingly boring. Not that
being anywhere else in the house would help -- it was the middle
of the night after all.

As soon as she was alone, she made herself comfortable, adjusting
the lighting and tossing her shoes aside. The thunk of her shoes
on the floor reminded her that she still had the napkin she'd
found in one of them earlier that day in her back pocket. She
retrieved it and carefully unfolded the note.

She sat down on the edge of the bed to read it. It was a note to
Lois... from Lois. But the message didn't make any sense.

*Lois,*

*It is only a paper moon, hanging over a cardboard scene. It's a
lot of make-believe, even if you can't believe me. Nat King Cole
can help you figure it out.*

*Lois*

The short missive was written in her familiar yet haphazard
handwriting that she used when she realized something or
discovered something for a story and was in a hurry to write it
down. But this cryptic message was unusual, and she had no memory
of writing it let alone sticking it in her shoe. Had she been
worried someone might find it? Shaking her head at it, she folded
the napkin and deposited it back in her pocket as she went about
the room looking for something to keep her busy.

Having been "locked in" for only thirty minutes or so, she'd
already passed the time alphabetizing the books on the small
bookshelf, reorganizing the dishes in the kitchenette, and
playing a few games of solitaire with a deck of cards. There was
still a large desk in the sitting area she could clean out and
organize. Maybe one of the floor-to-ceiling cabinets along the
far wall housed a television, and she could watch something.

Choosing to investigate the cabinets, she first opened all the
doors to see what was inside. Most of the doors revealed nothing,
but there was a very small television connected to a VCR in one
and a small AM/FM radio in another. The radio was unable to
receive any signals in the basement, and the only video tape Lois
found was titled 'Very Silly Kid Songs,' and so silence
remained.

Lois then looked in all the drawers. Linens and old decorations
filled a few of the drawers but most remained empty. Curious,
Lois continued to look through every other piece of furniture
that might house something. Many of the drawers and cabinets she
looked in were empty, but a few held more linens, and one held
several old magazines.

A weary sigh escaped her as she grabbed a few copies of *Inside
Metropolis* in hopes that reading could help the time pass more
quickly. Propping her legs up over the armrest of the chair she
chose in the sitting area, she began flipping through the old
magazine dated November 1993. The first few articles were about
some of the lesser known local businesses downtown, displaying
the services they offered and discussing what made them unique.

Flipping to the next page, Lois felt the blood drain from her
face and a queasiness settle in her stomach as an odd sense of
foreboding wrapped itself around her. There, staring at her from
the middle of the two-page spread was a picture of her and Clark
Kent. The Daily Planet sign from the wall of the newsroom served
as the background. Lois sat with her legs crossed in a chair just
in front of Clark who was perched on a desk. Lois had her arm
propped on his knee, and they smiled at the camera, her smile
no-nonsense and his charm.

"Inside with Lane and Kent: The Hottest Team in Town," she read
the headline out loud. She skimmed the article that was actually
three pages. It detailed how long they'd been working together,
highlighted some of their stories, and included the script of a
short interview. It was too weird. "What kind of sick joke is
this?"

The words of the missive materialized in her thoughts at just
that moment. *It's a lot of make believe*. Something wasn't
right, but what?

She was about to read through the article more carefully when she
heard something in the hall. Quickly tearing the pages out and
shoving them in her pocket, then stuffing the magazine under the
seat cushion, she stood and looked toward the door.

***

Chapter 25

He didn't see the upturned corner of the rug. How could he? It
was almost pitch black in this hallway, the only light coming
from under the door to the room where Lois was held captive. None
of the passages he'd gone through were well lit. Some even had
dirt or stone floors. How he'd made it this far without
stumbling was a mystery.

Clark paused for a moment, to ensure he'd regained his balance
before taking the few remaining steps to the door. He pressed his
ear to it but only heard his own heartbeat pulsing through his
head. Quickly reviewing the plan Scott had concocted, he prepared
himself to enter the room.

Taking a deep breath, he tried the door knob and wasn't
surprised when it opened without effort. After all, it was a
trap. But he couldn't have anticipated what awaited him.

She was standing at the other end of the room, arms straight and
held out a few inches from her body, as though she'd stood up
quickly. Most likely a result of so much noise in the hall. She
was dressed in jeans and a sweatshirt, her short hair barely
tucked behind her ears. Her face was pale with her mouth slightly
open, and the look in her eyes was a jumble of emotions.
Realizing they were alone, he quietly entered the room and shut
the door behind him, pressing himself flat against it with his
eyes closed.

He'd done it. He'd found Lois, whether or not she wanted him
to. But standing here in the same room with her, even with his
eyes closed, he became conscious of this indescribable draw to
her. Something familiar, like it had always been there. None of
this fit with what he knew, but it did fit with those dreams.
Were they memories? Had he asked this woman to marry him? Had she
professed her love?

He took a deep breath, opened his eyes, and pushed off the door,
taking a step further into the room only to find her eyes locked
on his and a frown gently creasing her forehead. The jumble of
emotions he witnessed moments ago had settled into confusion;
clearly, she wasn't expecting him. He felt her eyes drilling
into him, searching. What was she looking for? Was she finding
it?

"Clark?" she said his name with a hint of disbelief then
stepped toward him, slowly at first, then quickly. "Clark!" she
said again this time with relief. But it didn't quite reach her
eyes, and he could see her trying to force the uncertainty away.
What had happened to make her feel this way?

"Lois," he said as he carefully put his arms around her, his
hesitancy a result of the combination of guilt he still carried
and his own uncertainty of the entire situation. Hoping she
didn't notice his awkwardness, he held her at arm's length and
asked, "Are you alright?" She locked her eyes on his, and he
could see that she was unsure about something.

"I'm fine," she said, placing her hands on his chest. She
opened her mouth to speak, but the words seemed to get stuck.
There were questions in her eyes, and her hands burned holes
where they rested on his chest. Did she feel it, too? This pull
between them? "I didn't know if you'd come," she finally
said. "Lex... he said he would stop you."

He could hardly concentrate on anything else as he stared into
her eyes. How was it possible that he would have ever done
anything to hurt her, to ruin her life? How had he been able to
walk away from her, let alone stay away? And in this moment
standing here, feeling every point of contact between them, he
was sure that those memories were that -- memories. He'd spent
the past two years trying unsuccessfully to forget her.

*Unforgettable*. How appropriate.

She looked away first, toward the door and he mentally shook
himself, remembering what he was here to do. "It's all right,
I'll get you out of here."

She nodded, and he turned them toward the door. He had been so
nervous moments ago, but now having seen her and held her in his
arms, he no longer worried. Taking her hand, he led her out of
the room and down the hall. Years of guilt and shame fought to
keep their hold on him, but he easily forced them back when he
glanced at their hands.

He stopped at the end of the hall before opening the door and
looked at her hand once more, studying her slender fingers
wrapped around his. Even if he never remembered anything else, he
knew he would never be able to live without her. How he wished he
could clearly see her face, but the lighting was only barely
enough to know she was there.

Without turning, he reached to open the door but found it
locked.

"What's the matter?" she whispered, and the sound of it in
this dangerously intimate proximity did things to him that he
wasn't sure it should have.

"It's locked."

"I know another way," she said, giving his hand a squeeze as
she pulled him in another direction.

He followed her. He'd follow her anywhere.

***

She began their meeting feeling startled, but there was nothing
awkward or uncomfortable about it. Moments after seeing the
article, he had entered and leaned against the door, breathing
heavily. There was nothing sinister about him. Instead he seemed
anxious and just as shocked as she. His face was tense but
determined. She stared at him as he stood there with his eyes
closed and was filled with the impression that he was so...
magnetic, trustworthy.

When he opened his eyes, they collided with hers. It knocked the
wind out of her and froze her in place. His eyes were warm
instead of cruel, kind instead of callous. She found it
impossible to accept this man as the tormentor Lex had
described.

"Clark?" she breathed. The name was familiar on her tongue, but
with effort, she ignored these misgivings and followed the plan.

"Clark!" she said, going to him, intent on allowing him to
rescue her.

"Lois," he said, caution in his voice as he gently embraced her
and then awkwardly held her away. "Are you alright?" he asked
as she looked into his eyes.

"I'm fine," she said before she began drowning in the deep
pools of his eyes. But she made a mistake when she placed her
hands on his chest. Her hands burned from the touch. She looked
up to see desire in his eyes. It had required even more effort to
push out the next words. "I didn't know if you'd come. Lex...
he said he would stop you."

It was true, she hadn't known he would come. But standing there
in his arms did things to her that were inappropriate for a
married woman to be feeling. She felt ashamed and looked away.

"It's all right," he said, "I'll get you out of here."

Once separated, she was able to think more clearly than before.
This man was calculating and deceitful, out for his own gain, and
she would have to remember that, no matter how she physically
responded to him. He was just some handsome, delusional man who
needed to be set straight. She and Lex would talk to him and make
him see reason. Then she could go back to the life she'd been
living.

And then Clark took her hand to lead her out, which was just as
big of a mistake, and she swallowed hard. What was wrong with
her?

She followed him from the room and down the hall, but just as she
knew it would be, the door was locked. She swallowed and began
the charade again. "What's the matter?" she whispered into the
silence.

"It's locked." His deep, husky voice so close in the darkness
was intimate and caught her off-guard.

She swallowed again and pushed her apprehension aside. "I know
another way," she said. She gave his hand a squeeze and easily
led him in the wrong direction.

Winding through the dark passages, Lois had to focus on trying to
remember each turn, but all she could think about was what had
just happened when Clark finally arrived. She'd expected meeting
him again to be awkward, uncomfortable. Interacting with the
person said to be stalking you and playing along could only be
awkward and uncomfortable. But that wasn't what she saw in him.
How would she ever forget the tingling sensation his touch left
behind?

They had nearly reached their destination, and she felt the need
to redirect her thoughts. Maybe that was the real danger of this
man: he was entrancing her. *Stalker*, she reminded herself. *He
wants to ruin your life and take you away from Lex. He has been
trying to ruin your life for years, and if Lex hadn't done his
utmost to keep it from happening, to protect you, where would you
be now?*

"Where are we going?" he whispered, interrupting her thoughts
from a closer distance behind her than she'd expected.

She caught a glimpse of the steps that led to their intended
destination. Figuring that it didn't really matter what she told
him, she opted for the truth and answered, "This leads to a
house at the bottom of the bluff."

"How far is that from the end of the street your house is on?"
he asked as she reached the steps and began her ascent.

The question struck her as strange at first, but she quickly
justified it when she reasoned that he probably had some plan in
mind for their departure. "It's just a block or so away."

"Good. That is where Scott is. We won't have to walk much
farther."

"Scott?" She stopped abruptly and spun around to face him,
almost losing her balance. "What have you done to Scott?" she
spat, forgetting her role.

He pulled back from her with a deep frown etched on his face. She
assumed he would know that she was merely playing along. Had he
believed her this whole time? Before he had the chance to
respond, she turned and was about to begin skipping steps when
his words stopped her.

"Unforgettable," Clark said.

"What?" she said breathlessly. She didn't have time to stop
the word from escaping her, so shocking was what she heard. She
paused on the step. Had she heard him correctly? Had he chosen
that word on purpose? Or was it merely a coincidence? *It's a
lot of make believe*. The words came unbidden to her mind, and
she stood rooted to the spot.

"That's what you are," he finished the first line of the
familiar song.

"Nat King Cole," she said under her breath. She turned to look
at him over her shoulder and met his eyes, still frowning. *Nat
King Cole can help you figure it out*. She opened her mouth to
ask why he'd chosen to use those words as light flooded the
stairway.

***

Chapter 26

*Papa loves mambo,*

*Mama loves mambo,*

*Havin' their fling again, younger than Spring again*

*Feelin' that zing again, wow!*

Jimmy danced with the music but stopped abruptly when he saw
Perry glaring at him from behind his desk.

"Let's face it, Jimmy." Perry sounded defeated. "This just
isn't going to work. This isn't even his song."

"No, Chief, I don't think it has to be Nat King Cole's song.
'Joe Turner Blues' wasn't by him either. We just have to find
the right song."

Just a few hours ago, Jimmy had only been following a story about
patients who had recalled their memories after listening to a
particular Nat King Cole song, only to find that he himself --
and everyone else in the world, it seemed -- were part of this
story that was growing exponentially with each new piece of
information found.

They'd been listening to Nat King Cole for hours now, any song
they could find. Jimmy insisted on keeping the music playing,
believing that eventually Perry would recover his own memories.
Perry was being a good sport, but Jimmy had to admit that only
the return of his own memories would convince him that the
impressions of the generous, philanthropic, upstanding nature
that he'd associated with Lex Luthor were very, very wrong.

Over the past few hours, memories continued to surface for
himself and as they did, Jimmy became more and more aware of the
predicament they were in. As a result, he had begged mercilessly,
and now Inspector William Henderson was on his way. He didn't
understand what had happened, let alone how, but if even a
smidgeon of what he remembered about Mr. Luthor was true, he at
least understood *why*. And that would mean that Lois and Clark,
neither of which he'd seen in months, were in serious trouble.

"Jimmy," Perry spoke, leveling a stern look at him, "There is
no way the hard-hitting Editor-in-Chief of the best newspaper in
the country has *forgotten* the past two years *and* been duped
into believing something else. How could that be true for the
rest of the country either?"

*If I give my heart to you*

*Will you handle it with care?*

*Will you always treat me tenderly?*

"I don't know." Jimmy wasn't deterred, but he was interrupted
by Inspector Henderson

Dressed in the most casual clothing Jimmy had seen him in and
with disheveled hair, the inspector didn't bother to knock
before entering Perry's office. "What's this about?" he
practically yelled at them. "And how could it possibly be so
important that it couldn't wait the few hours until morning?"

"Inspector," Jimmy began, "Lois is in trouble!"

Henderson only raised his eyebrows. "I'm going to need a bit
more to go on, Jimmy," he said, crossing his arms over his
chest.

"Right." Jimmy took a deep breath, collecting his thoughts
before beginning. "Lex Luthor has done something to her, to
everyone really, but no one knows. I'm sure he hasn't hurt her,
but we've got to get to her and undo it." Jimmy shook his head.
That had sounded better in his head, but the look on Inspector
Henderson's face left no question about how useless it really
was.

"He's tellin' the truth."

Jimmy and Inspector Henderson turned at the same time to face
Perry who was still seated in the chair at his desk. His hands
were flattened on the desktop and that determined look that Perry
got when he knew his reporters were on to something big was
spreading across his face.

Jimmy smiled. "You remembered?"

"Only bits." Perry stood and walked around the table to face
Henderson. "But I can definitely tell you it's a *big* mess
that won't be easy to fix."

"You can't be serious." Henderson crossed his arms over his
chest and glared at Perry. "Lane's been married to Luthor for
two years--"

"No, she hasn't," Jimmy cut in. "I think everything changed
when Superman left."

"He's right," Perry agreed. "That monster has taken Lois, and
he's got everything outta whack."

"What's he done?" Henderson asked, leaning against Perry's
desk and crossing his feet at the ankles.

"I'm not sure, but everything I thought was true is a bunch of
phooey. Up until Superman left, Lois worked here with Clark Kent.
She never married Luthor. Instead, we, the three of us and Clark,
proved he was behind the destruction of the Daily Planet."

"Who's this Kent?" Henderson shook his head briefly, his brows
drawing into a deep frown. "Did you say Luthor destroyed the
Daily Planet?"

"I know it's hard to believe and even I didn't until just a
few minutes ago. You'll remember eventually, but we gotta send
someone to check on her and not let anyone know what we're up
to."

"Look, White," Henderson started, and Jimmy felt his hope
dwindle, "You have to see how ridiculous this sounds--"

"Boy, you got that right," Perry said under his breath.

Henderson stopped to shake his head and sigh. "But the Planet
has always been on our side. I'll give you one car, and you'll
need to go with it." He reached for Perry's phone and began
dialing.

"Now all we have to do is get him--" Perry thumbed toward the
inspector, "--to listen to some Nat King Cole." He chuckled,
and Jimmy smiled. "Thanks, kid."

"Ok, car's on its way here. Anything else you need from me?"
Henderson asked, walking to the door.

"Yeah," Jimmy said. He walked over to the CD player and removed
the disc. Putting it back in its case and grabbing the others on
the shelf, he took them to Henderson. "Listen to these... but
*not* while you're driving."

***

She had been lying to him, playing a part. She was part of the
trap. Clark wasn't able to stop the self-deprecating thoughts
from coming. They were second nature. He *was* a failure and
always would be. All he ever did was mess things up. And it was
happening *again*. He'd trusted the wrong person *again*.

But then he caught the quiet acknowledgment of what he'd said.
And it changed the direction of his thoughts. Did she know
something was up? Even if she didn't have access to those
memories, did that single word, *unforgettable*, have a deeper
meaning for her?

She turned, and he saw the confusion in her face. She wanted to
ask something, but the opening door stopped her and unease
settled on her features. And though he couldn't explain it any
better yet, protectiveness for this woman surged through him.

Until that moment, Clark hadn't realized how well adjusted to
the darkness he'd become or how much he was willing to trust
Lois despite the guilt he felt over something he was starting to
believe never happened. The light pouring from the doorway behind
Lois cast a halo around her, but the expression on her face was
anything but that of an angel.

"Lex?" she started, her eyes lingering on Clark before she
turned to face the man looming behind her.

"Lois, darling," he crooned. "I was beginning to worry." The
man held his hand out for Lois, and Clark saw her hesitate for a
split second before taking it. Taking the last steps, she left
Clark alone in the staircase to decide what he should do and
stood facing Lex as he handed her something too small for him to
see. He realized they were rings when, following a nearly
imperceptible shake of her head, Lex placed them on the ring
finger of her left hand. He then ushered her into the room.

"Kent," Lex sneered, turning to him. "Do come in." He
gestured to Clark as if he were inviting him in for tea and light
conversation, but his eyes gave him away. Clark wondered if Lois
saw it, too, but she had already disappeared into the room beyond
Lex.

Clark was out of time, no turning back. With new resolve, he
stepped onto the first step of the staircase. The only way this
mess would ever be over and done with required him to take risks.
Huge, enormous, frightening risks. But after coming face to face
with Lex Luthor, he knew Lois needed him. And he no longer cared
whether or not she wanted him.

"Luthor," he greeted. He stepped out of the stairway and into a
large but cozy and very blue home library.

He stood several feet behind a comfy white couch that faced a
coffee table. Plush white chairs formed another sitting area on
the other side of the room, and a large oriental rug separated
the two sitting areas. Shelves made up three of the walls, with
the fourth, to his right, interspersed with windows that looked
out into the cold early morning. He could tell the windows faced
east from the smallest hint of daylight that edged the horizon
and wondered how much time had passed since he entered the house
on the bluff. There was just enough light to see a dusting of
snow now covered the landscape, detracting from the cozy feel of
the room.

Lex was nearly in the middle of the large room with Lois tucked
just behind his right side, her hand in his. Clark stood just
inside the doorway with his hands ready to fight if necessary.
Drawing his attention back to the task at hand, Clark pulled up
all the lyrics from Nat King Cole songs that he could remember.
He would say as many as he could, hoping one of them would work
for Lois. It *had* to work, and he would wait until later to
consider what he would do if it didn't.

"It's time we all had a talk, Kent." Luthor's smug smile
grated on Clark, but it all but disappeared when he turned to
Lois and said, "Isn't that right, Darling?"

Her wide eyes and slightly opened mouth tugged once more at his
protectiveness, and he waited for her to speak, but no words came
forth. She looked uneasy, confused. A slight frown took over her
face when she looked at the man, and she inclined her head as if
to nod.

"It has become clear to me that we can't keep going on like
this," Lex began, turning to face Clark and putting himself in
front of Lois.

"*Answer me, oh, my love, just what sin have I been guilty
of*?" Clark said the lyrics, keeping his eyes on Lois. Would
Lois recognize it as well? The increase in her frown could have
been a yes or a no. *Unforgettable* was a familiar song to
anyone. This one was a bit more obscure, a fact he hoped would
allow him to continue to spout lyrics without questioning from
Lex. Surely if Lex realized what Clark was doing, he would be
stopped, and there was no telling which song would do the trick.

"Do not address her in that manner," Lex said, glaring as he
assumed a protective stance. "You must give up this fight."

Clark kept his eyes fixed on Lois, wondering what story Lex had
fabricated for her. Her face held such confusion and worry, but
he could not tell if it was concern for him or concern for
whatever lie she'd been told. "I will never give up," he said,
realizing the truth of the words as he spoke them. "*To the ends
of the earth, I'll follow my star, To the ends of the earth,
Just to be where you are." *And the lyrics meant precisely what
he intended to say.

Lois's brows could not be more drawn. Clark was thankful that
her position slightly behind Lex prevented the madman from
noticing her state.

"I gave you the chance to live your life separate from ours, but
you have chosen instead to ruin it."

"What chance did you ever give me?" Clark asked. "*I am
dejected. I am depressed. Yet resurrected and sailing the
crest.*"

"I'm glad to know that," Lex said with a pleased look on his
face. "Though, I had no idea you were such a poet, Kent."

Clark smiled inwardly at the great invitation Lex didn't even
realize he'd given. "*Poets often use many words to say a
simple thing. It takes thought and time and rhyme, to make a poem
sing*."

Lex narrowed his eyes and moved to step directly in front of
Lois. Clark moved his eyes to Luthor and allowed a short, angry
laugh to escape him before he continued. "I'm depressed about
something that never happened." Then switching his eyes back to
Lois, he said, "*You know the feeling of something half
remembered, of something that never happened, yet you recall it
well*."

She mouthed the words, 'Nat King Cole,' and rewarded Clark with
a small nod and the raising of her eyebrows.

Clark inwardly sighed in relief. She recognized what he was
doing, at least in part, and it renewed his resolve to stay the
course.

***

Chapter 27

In her nearness to him, Lois caught the small yet sharp intake of
breath from Lex and knew that Clark had said something that had
startled him, but she didn't know what. Had he realized that
Clark was quoting songs sung by Nat King Cole? Did it mean
something to him? Or was it the words themselves about
remembering something that took him by surprise?

It all took her by surprise. Standing there, listening to lyric
after lyric, she had done her best to keep her thoughts and
questions to herself. And she knew she'd been unsuccessful at
it. The whole situation was overwhelming, and she was beginning
to feel tired from the lateness of the hour and a little
nauseated at the stress of it all. Even her skin betrayed her as
it was covered in goose flesh. Clark's eyes were locked onto
hers, and she could feel him searching for something.

"It makes no difference to me why you were depressed," Lex
sneered as he moved to block Clark once more, "only that you
deserve to feel that way after everything you've done to Lois."
The hatred Lex had for Clark seeped from every pore of him and
into his words.

"Lex, please," she quietly interrupted, placing her hand in
his. "He has not succeeded in any of his plans in over two
years."

Lois didn't fully understand where the animosity had come from,
not knowing the schemes Lex had thwarted or how frequently
they'd taken place. But none of them had worked, and she hadn't
even known about them. They could not have been that severe.
Surely, Lex's rebuke was too much.

"I haven't done *anything* to her," Clark asserted. "That was
you." When Lois's eyes snapped to his, she saw his glare fixed
on Lex. What did he think Lex had done?

"Everything I have done is because I love her." Those
often-said words warmed her, and she squeezed his hand. As he
squeezed her hand in return, he pulled her forward and held up
their enfolded hands as evidence. "It should be obvious to you
that she loves me and only me. We have been happily married
despite you and everything you've done."

Clark looked surprised at his accusation. And, suddenly, she saw
it. He knew something she did not. Could he help explain that
note she'd found? But why would a person who had been absent
from her life for years know something about a note that she
didn't remember writing?

Clark's eyes spoke volumes in a language she couldn't
comprehend. Though she thought she understood his purpose, she
had no idea why or what the end result would be. Was he trying to
help her remember something? This was a puzzle she wished she had
time to figure out.

"*That's my girl. Take a look at her. She belongs to me*."
More lyrics.

"No!" Lex shouted, the intended offense successful. He jerked
her arm downward as he shouted and squeezed her hand hard enough
that she winced. "I will not allow you to ruin this for me. Not
after all the work I've put into it. Not even our... mutual
friend can stop me now."

*Mutual friend*? Lois wondered who that could be.

"*Better face the facts, ol' buddy, and be prepared to take the
blow*."

"On the contrary, it is you who must get ready for the blow."
Lex stepped toward him threateningly, and Lois hardly recognized
the man she'd married anymore. Where was the loving,
affectionate, devoted husband? "I should have killed you when I
had the chance," he growled.

Lois pulled her hand from Lex's and leveled him with a steely
gaze when he turned to face her, surprise that she'd pulled from
him evident in his raised eyebrows. Before she had a chance to
call him out for such a statement, she heard Clark once more
deliver lyrics from a familiar song.

"*There may be trouble ahead. But while there's music and
moonlight and love and romance, let's face the music and
dance*."

***

As the words left Clark's mouth, Lex watched Lois stop
completely, a confused and clouded look covering her face.

"Lois?" The rage having been temporarily pushed aside by this,
Lex took her hand back, gently this time, regretting the
harshness with which he had jerked her moments ago. She didn't
respond. Her mind was somewhere else. He glanced over his
shoulder to where Clark stood, eyes wide. "What have you done?"
he growled.

"Only what was needed."

What an ambiguous remark. Lex was stopped from replying, however,
as Lois began to crumble before him, as if her weight was too
much to bear while her mind was so engaged elsewhere.

He gently guided her to the chair a few feet behind her and
lowered her to it. "Lois?" he called once more.

The only response she gave was a simple shake of her head. He
reached to caress her cheek, brushing a lock of her soft brown
hair behind her ear. "Darling?"

Her eyes suddenly widened though it was clear that whatever she
was seeing wasn't him. Moments went by like this, all manner of
emotions flashing across her face. Then suddenly, her body
straightened, and her eyes cleared. They locked onto his and
before he could register the emotions in them, she shoved him
away hard, knocking him off balance, causing him to list to his
right. As he caught himself on the small table beside the chair,
she brushed past him.

Had she remembered again?

He smiled when, as she reached Clark, who had come further into
the room, the pain brought on by the kryptonite secreted in her
wedding rings crushed him. Handing them to her just as she
entered the room was brilliant on his part. She hadn't known it
was anything more than a token of his affection.

"It is as I said," he proclaimed, laughing. "You can't have
her." He stood up and calmly walked toward the cabinet behind
the chair Lois had just left.

"What's happening?" the pained voice of Clark asked.

"It must be kryptonite," he heard her explain as he opened the
cabinet. "You don't remember?"

*Remember*? He paused, looking over his shoulder to watch them.
The puzzle pieces clicked together as he played over the last few
minutes in his mind. What had just happened to Lois... It had
been her memory returning. Was it something Clark had done on the
way here? Was it something he said, one of his poetic phrases,
that had caused this? Or were those just a distraction to buy
time until...

"Not everything," rasped the pesky fly that wouldn't go away.
Lex would enjoy ridding himself of the irritant.

"*Don't you remember when I met you*?" she sang quietly,
reaching to touch his face. He cringed, and she drew her hand
back but continued the song, "*Didn't the moon look big that
night*?"

Why on earth would Lois be singing to Clark? This needed to end
as quickly as possible. He would kill Clark and have the
procedure done once more. And then everything would go back to
the way it was supposed to be. Lex with his Lois and their happy
family.

He thrust his hand into the cabinet only to find it empty. Pushed
beyond the limits of his patience, he released a yell and slammed
the door of the cabinet closed with enough force to break it.

He stood and turned to face them in time to see that same clouded
look in Clark's eyes -- a memory returning, how had it happened?
-- and Lois removing the rings from her finger.

He stormed toward her as she put them in her pocket. This would
end now.

***

She reached for his face again. Despite the agony he was feeling,
Clark turned his face toward her hand and brushed his lips on her
palm as his vision began to fog and that nauseating sense of
falling warned him of what was to come. Clark knew the signs of
another memory returning and closed his eyes, thankful she was
with him and wishing he were anywhere but here for this.

###

*November 20, 1995*

*He stood facing Lois. He had prepared physically for the
impending trip but not mentally. He'd avoided thinking about it
instead. Knowing he would be leaving her unprotected and alone
was too much. She was just inches in front of him now, her hands
warm on his chest, admiring the ring on her finger.*

"*I'll miss you," she said quietly and leaned her head forward
to rest on his chin. He could hear the anguish in her voice, and
it broke his heart.*

"*I know," he responded. He had to be strong for her. This
would just be another thing to get through. He brought her
further into an embrace and kissed the top of her head. He
breathed in the scent of her, committing it to memory, as if it
wasn't already there.*

"*I wish I knew how long you'd be gone," she said as she
reached her arms around him and laid her head on his chest.
"That would make this so much easier."*

"*I know," he said and squeezed her tightly to him. He
couldn't agree more. Not knowing how long this trip would take
or what he would find when he got there filled him with anxiety,
and he hid it as well as he could.*

*She looked up at him then. The anguish in her eyes spoke volumes
without a single word. She knew he had to do this. She had been
encouraging him. But she was sacrificing her own peace of mind
for him. And he loved her even more for it.*

"*Lois, I will *never* stop thinking about you." Looking
straight into her eyes, he needed her to know without a doubt
that he was speaking from his heart. He put everything he could
into his next words. "You will be what keeps me going, what
keeps me grounded, what pulls me home." He leaned toward her,
needing to be closer.*

*She met his eyes and reached for his face.*

*He pulled her in as close as he could, enveloping her in his
arms, locking eyes with her. "I love you, Lois," he breathed.*

"*Clark--"*

*He cut her off. Words were useless now; only something physical
could possibly say what he needed to. The way she responded told
him she felt the same way. He didn't want to let go, couldn't
let go, she was safe as long as he had her in his arms. How could
he do this?*

*As if reading his thoughts, her breath caught, and a sob escaped
her lips as she pulled back. "What if you can't get back?" He
could hear the fear, see it in her eyes. "Clark, I--"*

"*No, Lois." He shook his head. This kind of thinking and
worrying would not help anything. He needed to be strong for her.
They could do this. "Don't think like that. I *will* be back,
and we'll live out the rest of lives together, you as my wife
and me as your husband. We'll start a family. And grow old
together."*

*She stared into his eyes, and he stared back willing her to
understand, to see it in him. As she relaxed in his arms, he knew
now was the time.*

"*I have to be going now," he said.*

"*Please," she begged, lowering her head. "Just a few more
minutes."*

*He could never refuse her, especially now. He brought her chin
up with his finger and looked deeply into her eyes. "Anything,"
he promised and pressed his mouth to hers one last time. He
lifted her up as he poured as much of himself into her as he
could.*

*But it was time. He pulled himself away, and the breath rushed
from him as he watched her slowly close her eyes and take a deep
breath, fortifying herself. He gave her hands one more squeeze
before he released them and turned toward the opening door.
Applause filtered in, and he stepped toward it.*

*Her sob broke what pieces of his heart were left. He turned and
mouthed, 'I love you.'*

###

The physical pain of the kryptonite made the emotional pain of
the memory that much more real to him and as the sensations of
the returning memory released their grip, he squeezed his eyes
shut.

His eyes flew open when Lois's hand suddenly left his cheek. He
heard her frantic cry and saw her being pulled away from him and
tossed like a rag onto the floor on the other side of the coffee
table. The pain eased slightly, but it was only momentary,
worsening as Lex pushed him down flat on his back. Quickly taking
the dominant position, Lex straddled him and pinned his arms to
the ground.

Clark was no match for him in this state. But what he lacked in
strength he more than made up for in grit. He would never give up
fighting this monster. No man who would treat a woman that way
could ever claim to love her.

Despite the pain, Clark struggled against his captor, stilling
only when a blow to his cheek brought stars to his eyes. A second
blow to his jaw brought the taste of blood with it.

"I should have killed you when I had the chance," Lex hissed,
hatred dripping from his words as he pulled back his fist for
another hit.

As if in slow motion, Clark watched the fist come toward his face
but miss its mark as the heel of a woman's shoe attached to a
woman's leg pushed Lex's head to the side, knocking him off
balance and releasing Clark from his attacker.

Lex lay where he landed, motionless. Clark rolled his head to see
Lois resume her stance and wondered how severely she'd hurt Lex.
She dug into her pocket and pulled out something he couldn't
quite see as she walked across the room to the windows lining one
wall. A soothing draft of cold, crisp air rushed over him as she
opened one of the windows, threw whatever it was out, and pulled
it closed again.

***

Chapter 28

*Deep breath*, she thought. *It's over now*. Lois calmed herself
while she stood at the window.

It had been in her wedding rings. Lex had put kryptonite in her
wedding bands. She shouldn't be surprised. Had it been in there
the whole time? If it had been, she was lucky she had removed
them that first day they were in Columbia, or she never would
have been able to get as close as she had to Clark.

The rush of memories that assailed her moments ago brought back
an incomplete picture of what had happened, but she knew Clark's
powers had somehow been disabled. Removing the kryptonite from
the room would not solve that problem, but it would help.

It was the only thing that weakened Clark. Each exposure reduced
him to a writhing infant, powerless and weak, and with it, pain
consumed him. And that was certainly what had just happened. But
exposure to it wasn't how his powers were disabled for these
months they were apart. How had Lex done it? Did he still have
more kryptonite on him now? She would have to find it and get rid
of it as well.

She heard movement behind her and assumed it was Clark but was
surprised to instead hear Lex. "This is far from over," he said
in a voice she hardly recognized.

She whipped around and found him hunched in the doorway that led
to the rest of the house, leaning on it for support and glaring
at Clark. His eyes shifted to her. Anger seethed from them before
he stepped back and pulled the door closed.

The click of the lock echoed through the room. Lois stood there
unable to move, shocked. The mistake she made was opening the
window. Of course, the cool air had revived him. And now she
couldn't begin to guess where he went or what his next step
would be.

She stared at the closed door a moment longer, his malicious
expression burned into her memory. This side of Lex was new to
her, but she couldn't be certain with her memory riddled with
holes as it was. All she could remember at this point was love
and caring strangely mixed with manipulation and control. But now
it was as though something had snapped in him. Had she ever seen
him lose control like that before? Had this rage always been
there, lurking beneath the surface?

She took a deep breath and prayed she would have enough
resourcefulness to escape this nightmare before he returned.

She quickly made her way to Clark, kneeling at his side. He
hadn't moved from his sprawled position on the floor and lay
there with his eyes closed, breathing slowly and evenly, his face
just beginning to swell under the red marks left by Lex's fists.
Relief at having this moment to be alone with Clark washed over
her.

"Clark," she whispered, gently caressing his face with her
hands.

Inhaling deeply, as if relaxing at her touch, his right hand came
up to cover hers. "Lois," he breathed. His fingers wove between
hers as he turned his head and kissed her palm in an intimate
gesture that melted her.

"We have to get out of here." Moving her left hand to his
shoulder, she felt him shaking. "Can you get up?" she asked.

Without releasing the hand he still held to his face, he used his
free arm to assist him in sitting up. As soon as his weight was
balanced, his free arm came up around her waist, and he pulled
her tightly to him. His right hand released hers and gently
embraced her neck. He kissed her as if he wasn't sure he'd ever
get to kiss her again... the way he kissed her before Superman
left.

***

His splintered memory of her confused him, but he was unable to
stop himself from pulling her into this embrace, pressing his
lips to hers. And this, the feel of her, this was right. Despite
all his doubts and the jumble of conflicting beliefs, there could
be no denying it.

In his arms was where she belonged.

She pressed into him, and her soft sob escaped between them. When
he pulled back, her eyes were filled with tears, and he brushed
away the one that escaped with his thumb. The amount of passion
and sadness in her eyes tore at him, and he was still powerless
to do anything about it.

She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his, gently, lovingly.
"Are you okay?" she murmured against him. This amazing woman
who had once drudged up every unpleasant feeling inside him was
affectionate and concerned about him. How had he been so
worried?

A noise from the stairwell behind them startled them both. Clark
tensed, expecting the worst, and protectively shifted Lois away
from the threat as he turned.

There, leaning in the doorway, standing a few steps down, was
Scott. His breaths came fast and relief flooded his face as he
quickly glanced around the room. Immediately, Clark relaxed.

"Scott!" Lois nearly squealed, and Clark smiled at her
excitement.

"Where's Luthor?" he asked hurriedly.

"I don't know," Lois answered as she stood up.

Coming into the room, Scott hastily checked the door, finding it
locked and began peering through the windows at the lightening
sky. "Are you guys okay?" he asked as he turned to face them.

Clark lifted himself from the floor to sit on the arm of the
couch near the door to the stairwell. Even after only a few
minutes away from the kryptonite, he felt better. He was no
longer in excruciating pain, at least. Lois came to stand beside
him, infusing strength into him with her touch.

"For now," he answered. "How did you find us?"

"I told you I'd come in if you hadn't come back out in twenty
minutes." He began looking in the drawers and cabinets as he
continued his explanation. "I followed the passage you went
through until I found it locked. After I jimmied the door open, I
found the house empty." He paused to look at them. "When this
all started, I was worried about what Luthor would do when he
figured out I helped Lois's memories come back. So, I put
trackers in all of her shoes."

"Brilliant," Lois stated.

Scott huffed. "We're not out of this yet."

"No, we're not," Clark agreed.

"I can drive us straight to the police. They'll take some
convincing, but with the three of us, it ought to be enough to at
least get an investigation started." Scott began walking back
toward the doorway through which he'd just entered. "Let's
head out this way," he began, indicating the stairway while
turning to face Lois and Clark. "Luthor won't--"

His sentence was cut short. Clark watched helplessly as a syringe
was quickly raised and, before he could react, plunged into
Scott's neck. As his body crumbled to the floor, Clark froze.

There, blocking their intended exit, stood Lex Luthor, crouched
over his victim like a coiled cobra waiting to strike.

***

Chapter 29

Lex locked the door despite knowing they would be unable to
leave. Clark was in no position to go anywhere fortunately and
though Lois would argue, she lacked the ability to get him out of
there on her own. But he could not afford to take any chances.

Already someone had let him down. The device he'd had made
especially for this was supposed to be placed in the cabinet, but
the phrase, 'If you want something done right, you better do it
yourself,' seemed to apply here.

The two houses, this one and the chateau on the bluff, were
connected by a long, mostly finished tunnel. That feature, along
with the view and several other secrets the chateau held, were
his motivations for procuring the two as his own. The tunnel
branched out at several points leading to different places in
this house. Perhaps the person who had been tasked with the job
of stashing the device placed it in one of the other rooms.

The first room he had checked did not have cabinetry large enough
to hold the weapon. He was pleased, however, to find that it was
the room where Dr. Hightower had stored his supplies. In
anticipation of performing the procedure on Lois once again, he
had selected a pre-filled syringe and tucked it into his pocket.

He had checked two of the other rooms that featured an entrance
to the tunnel before finding in the third the weapon he would use
to kill that wretch. It was a large device, larger than he would
have liked, but Montgomery had affixed a strap to it that he put
over his shoulder. He made a mental note to make the person
responsible for this flub suffer for his inadequacies before
heading toward the door.

He stopped abruptly before leaving the room and decided that
approaching from an unexpected direction may be of some use,
especially if Clark had recovered any. Even as a child, Lex had
learned that it is always best to increase your advantage, even
if only slightly. He made his way through the passage to the
tunnel and then back up the stair well.

An unexpected voice caught his attention as he started up the
steps, causing him to pause. Hoping he hadn't been noticed, he
listened in.

"I followed the passage you went through until I found it
locked. After I jimmied the door open, I found the house
empty."

*Ferguson*. Of course he would be there. He was responsible for
making sure that Clark had arrived. Albeit late. At least he
could be counted on to follow through, even if not on time. Lex
considered himself lucky as he took the next few steps.

"When this all started I was worried about what Luthor would do
when he figured out I helped Lois's memories come back...."

Whatever Ferguson said next, Lex didn't hear. Stunned by the
shocking realization, he stood motionless, narrowing his eyes and
watching Scott walk toward the staircase. In the blink of an eye,
he came to a decision and quickly and quietly ascended the
remaining steps. Pulling the syringe from his pocket, he readied
it and was relieved when Ferguson turned just before Lex revealed
himself.

"Let's head out this way. Luthor won't--"

Lex injected the serum intended for Lois into Ferguson. He made
no effort to help the man. He didn't watch him crumple to the
floor. Instead, he watched the expressions on his least and most
favorite persons change as they realized what had happened.

His dislike of Clark was so strong he could taste its bitterness
in his mouth, and his nose wrinkled at the unsavory flavor. He
aimed the gun at him and laughed when Clark put himself in front
of Lois. Ever the protector, he would be powerless to stop what
was coming.

"You have taken her from me for the last time," Lex said coolly
as they both backed into the center of the room. "I realize that
the moment all this began, really truly began, I should have done
away with you when I had the chance. It would have been easy. You
were an unconscious heap when you were pulled from the water.
Weak. Helpless. But instead, I was selfish. I wanted to see you
suffer, and I did. It was glorious for these last two months. Not
only," he emphasized, "were you a bumbling idiot filled with
self-pity over something that never happened, but I," he smiled
and sought Lois's eyes over Clark's shoulder, "I reaped the
rewards."

"You monster!" Lois spat at him, moving to step around Clark.
Clark stopped her with his outstretched arm, preventing whatever
action she would have taken against him.

"Lois, everything... *everything* I do is because I *love
you*." Lex paused as he looked into her eyes.

"Love is a word you've only heard," she sneered, "and can't
begin to know the meaning of."

Her words cut through him. She couldn't possibly understand it
right now. All she could see was the animal she believed him to
be. But he'd proven to her before that he was worthy of her
love, and she had freely given it. He was determined to have what
he was in danger of losing and not even her angry face could stop
him.

"But, I must," he began. "You never doubted my sincerity even
once."

***

Lois watched as Lex came further into the room, a bruise
expanding on the cheek she had planted her heel into earlier.
Lex's steely eyes and wicked smile made her blood run even
colder when she realized he was carrying a weapon. He kept the
gun aimed at Clark. It was large enough to require a strap,
making Lex look like he belonged in some sort of action movie.
Those cold eyes left no question that he was intent on killing
Clark. And given all that had transpired to get them to this
point, she knew he had the capability.

"Love does not boast," Clark said, surprising her, "and it is
not proud or self-seeking." He turned to look directly at her.
"Instead it is patient and kind, rejoices in truth. And always
protects." He turned back to Lex. "What have you done that is
so loving?"

"I have nothing to prove to you, Clark," Lex taunted. "I had
her love once, and I shall have it again." The corners of his
mouth slowly stretched higher. "But there is something I want
you both to know before I end this."

She stepped closer to Clark and slipped her fingers into his
hand. As he squeezed her hand in return, she braced herself to
hear whatever Lex would throw at them.

"Tell me, Clark," he said casually, as if starting a
conversation between friends, his eyes set on Clark's. "When
she found you, did she tell you she's carrying my child?"

Standing behind Clark made it difficult to gauge his reaction,
though she felt his hand stiffen in hers. She hadn't been able
to get close enough to Clark to do any more than sing to him from
a distance, let alone tell him of the ruse she'd invented,
before Lex had kidnapped her.

"It's not true," she denied, pulling Clark's stiff hand in an
effort to get him to look her way. He turned his confused eyes to
her. She shook her head vehemently as he searched her face.

"Oh, but Darling, it is true," Lex said simply. In her
periphery, she saw him step closer but kept her gaze fixed on
Clark. "I've watched your symptoms for a while now. I wasn't
at all surprised when you told me the day after our
anniversary."

"No," she asserted. "He's lying." Lex lowered the weapon a
tiny amount, and Lois saw an opportunity. If she could just get
Clark to see it, too, they might be able to get the gun from him.
Sending signals with her eyes, she prayed Clark would understand
what she meant.

"Really?" Lex asked. "And how do you explain your moods? The
morning sickness?"

She looked from Clark to the weapon and back, widening her eyes
at just the right time. She was relieved when she saw the
faintest of nods from Clark. "When I realized what was going
on," she started, "I was repulsed by you and ashamed at what I
had allowed to happen. I was disgusted by myself, and every time
you did or said anything, I was overwhelmed by it. But I was
afraid, and I couldn't have said the real reason why I was
behaving the way I did. It was the first thing that came to
mind." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

It was the truth. She hoped Clark would see that. But there would
be time later for them to work this out. There would be much more
to work out...

A squeeze from Clark's hand brought her out of her thoughts.
"Either way," he said, looking directly at her, "she's mine
now."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Lex take another step
forward, putting himself nearly beside Clark. Clark tilted his
head slightly away from Lex. As she realized what he meant by the
gesture, time slowed down.

She took a step away as Clark released her hand and lunged
sideways toward Lex, his hand coming up to knock the gun away.
Lex's eyes were on her, but as he caught sight of Clark's
movements, he stepped back and swung the barrel of the gun in
Clark's direction.

***

His first move ineffectual, Clark's other hand came from behind
and slammed downward on the gun. Clark followed through with the
motion, dragging the gun as well as Lex toward the ground,
slamming the barrel of the gun into the floor.

A thunderous crackle sounded, and a blinding golden flash filled
the room for a split second as the barrel of the gun split open
and pain once more gripped Clark. As he fell backward to lean on
the couch behind him, his ears were assaulted by what could only
be an alarm wailing. Unable to tell where the piercing sound came
from, he looked around the room to see Lois crouching beside
Scott before meeting Lex's eyes head on as red and green sparks
flew from the damaged weapon he still held. The widening of
Lex's eyes told Clark that something was very wrong, and, with
an angry growl, Lex pulled the strap from his arm and ran toward
Lois.

Clark squeezed his eyes closed and focused all of his energy on
ignoring the all-encompassing pain. The malfunctioning weapon
continued its noisy protest and, despite the fact that he wanted
nothing more than to relax into the pain until it subsided, Clark
pulled himself up and stumbled toward the window.

The sun peaked just above the horizon, glinting off of the snow
and casting a faint glow in the room. Using his elbow, he
shattered the glass of the window and cleared the shards still
protruding from the frame. The cool air rushed in, recharging
him, and he turned to see Lex dragging Lois toward the locked
door as she fought to free herself from his grasp.

When he was but a few steps away, Lois freed her arm and turned
to him with fear in her eyes. He reached for her and took her
hand as Lex grabbed her arm.

"The window!" Clark shouted over the racket of the weapon and
its alarm. Mercifully, Lex relaxed his grip and followed them to
the window where Clark did his best to help Lois through.

Once outside, she turned her pleading eyes to him.

"Run!" Clark yelled to her. "Go! I'm right behind you!"

And for once she listened.

But he wasn't right behind her.

Scott was still in there.

Turning, he ran into Lex, who said something he couldn't make
out. Surely adrenaline served as the source of strength that
suddenly filled him and, grabbing Lex by the arm and dragging him
along, he reached Scott's still limp body that had fallen behind
the couch.

They awkwardly worked together to lift Scott, and with Lex
shouldering his right side and Clark on his left, they went for
the open window. An increase in the volume of the terrible sound
coming from the machine warned of its impending destruction with
little time to prepare for it.

The ensuing explosion was deafening.

The blast propelled the three of them through the window, tearing
them from each other. Clark twisted his body around to see a
colorful fireball expanding exponentially from the gun as it
split into pieces, flinging him along with debris out into the
cold morning.

***

Chapter 30

"Run!" Clark yelled to her. "Go! I'm right behind you!"

And for once she listened.

She ran as fast as she could, the blood rushing in her ears,
drowning out all other sounds. It wasn't until she registered a
loud roaring behind her that she stopped and turned to see Clark
wasn't there. As she looked toward the window he'd helped her
through, a thunderous boom resounded as a fireball of color
erupted before her. She felt the pressure of the shockwave pass,
tossing her hair.

She stood horrified, her heart stopping as she watched the flames
dissipate to reveal a massive, rough-edged hole in the side of
the house. No blue walls to be seen. Only debris and remnants of
what used to be a library strewn about.

As if she were observing instead of participating, she saw
herself running toward the site, a thousand thoughts running
through her head. Where was Clark? Why hadn't he followed? Was
he okay? Could he have survived the blast without his powers?

As she neared the house, she spotted Scott sprawled in the snow.
The sun's horizontal rays provided enough light to see that he
appeared mostly uninjured. She carefully placed shaking fingers
on his neck to check for a pulse and let out a breath when she
confirmed he was alive though he remained unconscious, his limp
state likely saving him from more severe injuries.

Rising to continue the search for Clark, she noticed several
gravel-sized chunks of red and green. Kryptonite. Red *and*
green?

She spotted Clark a few yards away face down in the snow and
rushed to his side, landing on her knees. His shirt was in
tatters and a dark shape beneath the strips of fabric caught her
eye. Ignoring it, she gently pressed her trembling hand to his
throat.

A pulse.

Relief filled her, and she couldn't stop the sobs that came with
it. Choosing to investigate the shape she saw first, she tore his
shirt to reveal a tattoo. An intricately drawn phoenix stretched
its head below fiery wings, its long tail feathers arching down
the middle of Clark's back. Only a few inches long, what struck
her was the tattoo's coloring -- reds and greens that sparkled.
She breathed out. *That* was how they'd disabled his powers.

Pushing aside her own shock, she grasped his shoulders and with
great effort rolled him to his side. His glasses sat askew,
broken. She straightened them and realized how useless it was.
Tears streamed down her cheeks, and she grabbed his face with
both of her hands.

"Clark?" she sobbed. "Clark, wake up." She leaned forward and
touched her forehead to his. "Please," she begged, "I need
you."

Nothing.

She could feel his breath on her chin and took comfort knowing
that he was still alive. But what kind of damage was done? She
continued to carefully roll him over onto his back and gasped
when she saw a huge gash across his chest, right where the S
would have been. She gently peeled back the fabric that was near
it. She pulled out the napkin -- the one with the note she wrote
to herself -- and pressed it to his chest, then covered the
make-shift bandage with pieces of his shirt to hold it in place.

Through her tears, she checked over the rest of his body and was
relieved to not see anything that caused her more concern. But
she knew the shards of kryptonite surrounding them only added to
his pain that, thankfully, he wasn't aware of yet. Pressing her
hands to his face again, she stared at him.

At the moment, she was a useless puddle of mush, which wasn't
helping anyone. Quickly taking control of her emotions, she
focused her mind on doing whatever she could to help. Standing,
she said a quick thank you for the risen sun and carefully
collected all the shards of red and green kryptonite that
surrounded them.

A soft moan came from behind her, and she turned to find Lex
lying on the ground. She stiffened. That same mix of affection
and hatred assailed her, and with it the nausea she'd
experienced before. Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to
check on him.

***

He couldn't stand it. Hearing her heart-wrenching cries. Being
incapable of comforting her.

He could feel his own life slipping away. It wouldn't be much
longer.

Everything had been going so well. For years, he had successfully
overcome insurmountable circumstances and wormed his way out of
impossible situations. He'd even come back from the dead, thanks
to his dedicated physician.

Superman had prevented him from ending it all months ago, and he
took complete advantage of every moment he'd been given to
devise a plan to get exactly what he'd wanted. It had been so
successful that for just over two months he'd lived the life he
was destined for. And it was everything he'd dreamed it would
be.

Having Lois love him and be with him, laughing with her, crying
with her, fighting with her... He'd known from the moment he
laid eyes on her that she was perfect. His prize. And he was
willing to win her.

But she didn't want him back then. That alien cad stole her from
him, and then it was that foolish reporter partner of hers. Just
his luck that they would turn out to be one and the same. He
really should have rid himself of that affliction when he'd had
the chance. But his lofty aspirations of vengeance would prove to
be his end.

And it was bittersweet. Himself mortally wounded. His nemesis
unconscious, presumably dying without superpowers to aide him.
His beloved crying over his enemy instead of him.

And here he was alone in his final moments, forced to listen to
it.

The pain in his gut suddenly intensified, and he groaned as he
rolled his head toward the sound of her movements. She must have
heard him because she paused and looked at him. He wished she
would come to him, yet he wanted her to stay away. When she began
walking toward him, he closed his eyes to consider what his last
words to her would be.

"Lex," she said softly, as though she cared.

He opened his eyes to see her kneeling beside him, her
tear-stained cheeks red in the sunlight. The sun's rays came in
at such a low angle that it made her face glow as if she were an
angel. "My darling," he started, "I am sorry."

She was carrying something and when she emptied her hands into
her lap, he saw the red and green shards. She was working to give
his enemy a fighting chance. The thought sickened him, and he
grimaced as he turned his head away.

Her hand on his shoulder felt like fire to his already warm body.
Despite the pain it caused, he reached to cover her hand with his
and ignored her flinch, squeezing her fingers with as much of his
affection as he could give to her in these last moments.

Opening his eyes once again, he beheld the sunrise in all its
glory. The bright orb slowly ascended toward lines of high
clouds. The fresh snow glistened.

"I know that you really did love me, Lois." He rolled his head
back to see her, a far better sight to be his last. "For a
time," he added.

She frowned as her eyes shimmered in the sunlight, and he allowed
himself to pretend the tears were for him. But the anger and pain
behind them made that difficult.

"Lois, I want you to know that everything... everything... I did
was because... I love you."

"What you did had nothing to do with love," she spat at him.
"You were only ever thinking of yourself. If you had loved me,
you would never have done *any* of that."

It would have been better if she'd remained silent. How could
she doubt him? He could feel the life slipping from him. He would
never have the chance to prove himself to her, to fix that frown
on her face. "I was... selfish... I am sorry. Please... do not
hold anything... I've done against... our child."

"I'm not pregnant," she said, breathless, twisting the knife
in his already failing heart.

"But you are," he whispered. Why didn't she believe him?

"I hate you!" she yelled.

She continued speaking, but he couldn't concentrate on her
words. He looked deeply into her eyes one last time but only felt
the burn of her anger and confusion. He wanted to reach up and
smooth the worry from her brow, erase the hatred from her eyes.
If he could only make her see, but his time was running out. He
squeezed her hand once again, thankful she hadn't pulled it from
his grasp, before he surrendered to the darkness enclosing in on
him and closed his eyes.

***

"I hate you!" she yelled. "How could you do this to me? You
say you love me, but you tear me away from everything important
to me and ruin my life with your insane plans!"

She stopped her rant as she felt his grip on her fingers tighten
and then relax. His eyes closed, and his body relaxed. He was
gone. The lump in her throat made her all the more angry.

"How dare you!" she yelled through hot tears at his lifeless
body. How would she ever find any closure from this nightmare?

She turned away from him and emptied her stomach, overwhelmed by
her mixed emotions. Was she pregnant? How could he know? Was he
lying even in the last moments of his life? If only he could tell
her how he knew.

The sunlight winked off of one of the pieces of kryptonite in the
small pile she made, and she pushed aside her feelings to get
back to a task far more important than stewing over the ravings
of a deceased madman.

Rising, she took the pieces she'd found and began throwing them,
the physical motion destroying what hold she had on her
composure. Overcome by anger and anguish, she screamed as she
threw one of the stones as far as she could, releasing as much
emotion as she could with the exertion. Again, she threw another
rock with a resounding scream. She continued until she had no
more stones to throw.

Standing there with her hands now empty, she felt numb. Staring
into the distance, she heard the faint sounds of emergency
vehicles and was thrust back into the situation at hand. She
quickly turned and ran back to Clark.

He hadn't moved at all, but the slow rise and fall of his chest
confirmed he was still alive. She knelt at his side and took one
of his hands in hers. With her other hand, she caressed his face,
hoping for a sign that removing the kryptonite from his presence
had helped. Looking at him now, she could tell that he seemed to
be breathing easier and more deeply. His face was more swollen
and bruised from the punches Lex had landed. She checked the gash
on his chest and saw that it had stopped bleeding. What else
could she do?

Tears came again, and she could only lay her head on his chest,
grasping his shoulders. Her tears turned to weeping, and she
reached her arms around him in an awkward embrace. The enormity
of the ordeal engulfed her, and the emerging sobs shook her.

Questions filled her head and threatened to push her beyond her
limits. Was Lex telling the truth? How could he know? Would she
be able to bring his child into the world if she were pregnant?
How would Clark react? Could she do this if Clark chose to be
done with her?

She startled when she felt his arm come up to touch her shoulder,
stopping her brooding. She pulled away quickly and stared into
his face. His eyes were barely open. "Clark!" she breathed,
"You're awake!"

***

Using strength he didn't think he had, he reached his arms
around her and pulled her into the embrace. Her sobs shook him.
He held her as tightly as he could, pressing her firmly to his
chest. He didn't care one bit how much it hurt him to do so. She
needed the closeness as much as he did, more so even.

"Lois," he whispered. It was all he could say. There was so
much he wanted to say, but there would be time for that later.
Right now, he just wanted to hold her and never let go, and she
seemed to want the same thing.

It felt like minutes passed before she was able to relax and
breathe more evenly. He reluctantly released her, moving his
hands to grasp her arms as she propped herself up, hovering over
him. Tears streamed down her face, but her smile was so genuine
and heartfelt.

He reached his thumb up and brushed it across her cheek before
dropping it back to his side. "*Brush those tears from your
eyes, and try to realize, that the ache in my heart is for
you*," he said quietly, smiling up at her.

Her half sob, half laugh tugged at his heart. "Clark, you don't
need to do that anymore. I *know*." Shifting her weight to one
hand, she brought the other up to brush the hair from his
forehead.

"What do you know?" he asked in a whisper, allowing his eyes to
drift closed.

"Everything... I think," she said, placing her hand on his
cheek. He relished her touch and wished he could remember it all,
too. "Are you okay?" she asked.

"I'll live," he said. It was then he remembered how he'd
gotten to this spot, lying in the grass beside a severely damaged
house with debris strewn about. His eyes flew open as he
remembered the others that were with him. "Scott?"

"He's still unconscious," she answered quickly. "But I think
he's okay." She looked over her shoulder, but he kept his eyes
on her. When she turned back to him, her face was drawn, and she
looked shaken. "Lex is dead."

Lois was strong; he knew it even without having access to all his
memories. But this was a lot for anyone to go through. He could
see she hadn't been hurt by the explosion of that weapon. But
how long had she moved around in the aftermath? What had she
witnessed?

She sat back on her heels as he tried to sit up. He winced at the
pain he felt and reached up to feel his chest, brushing his
fingers over his shirt. Carefully pulling his shirt open, he
found a napkin that had something written on it pressed to his
chest.

"It's all I had," she whispered.

He looked up to meet her eyes, took her hand in his and squeezed
it. "It's enough."

When he looked back down at the napkin, he gently lifted it from
his skin to see the gash below. No longer invulnerable, he'd
been hurt several times over the last two months, but this was no
simple abrasion. A shard of glass or some other debris must have
hit him. He pressed the napkin back on top and took a moment to
look at it.

The wrinkled and blood-stained thing was difficult to read, but
he could still make it out. "*Lois*," he read out loud. "*It
is only a paper moon, hanging over a cardboard scene. It's a lot
of make-believe, even if you can't believe me*." He paused and
glanced up at Lois who looked intently at her fingers as she
twisted them in her lap. "*Nat King Cole can help you figure it
out. Lois*."

"I wrote it when we made a stop on the way here." She looked up
at him then, still shaken. "I was worried Lex would... do that
thing again... which he did... I found that in my shoe yesterday
and read it a few minutes before you arrived. And when you
started quoting Nat King Cole songs, I started to think you knew
what that note meant."

"Oh, Lois," he said, shaking his head. "I know what the note
means, but I don't know much else." When she frowned at him, he
continued, "My memories are locked under layers... I didn't
even believe they were *memories* at first. I thought they were
dreams."

She tilted her head to the side, like a curious puppy, and it
made him chuckle. "What do you remember?" she asked.

"I remember asking you to marry me." Her smile was infectious
and encouraged him. "I remember you were dead -- or dying -- and
I tried to revive you. I was sure both of those were dreams." He
gave a half-hearted laugh. "I remember how the Platt story
*actually* went. I remember floating in the clouds... with you."
He reached for her hand and caressed it, feeling her slender
fingers, then weaving his fingers between hers. "I remember
leaving you."

He tried to squash that old guilty feeling that came up as he
lowered his head. Only this wasn't guilt over something that
never happened.

He had left.

And that was what had allowed all of this to happen. He would
make sure that never happened again... if she would let him.

"Clark," her soothing voice touched him as she gripped his
hand, "don't do that. Don't blame yourself. Neither of us knew
what would happen." He looked up to her eyes that held such
warmth and love and gave her a weak smile. "You came for me, to
help me, without even knowing why."

He huffed. "I thought you didn't want me to come."

"And you rescued me... again. Now it's my turn to rescue you."
She smiled that captivating smile once more and he was
mesmerized. "*Non dimenticar means don't forget you are my
darling*," she sang, her voice like honey, "*Don't forget to
be, all you mean to me*."

He grinned at her. "I already tried that one," he said. "But I
can see now that getting my memories back will be an enjoyable
endeavor."

"*Bend a little my way*," she sang, leaning closer to him.
"*Lean a little my way*."

He leaned in to meet her, their lips barely touching when
shouting erupted from the side of the house.

***

Chapter 31

The house was well-lit on the outside despite the sun getting
ready to peak over the horizon. A light covering of snow
blanketed the building along with everything else, but it would
likely melt before the day was over. As the police car pulled up
to the enormous house, Jimmy felt a sense of awe. He'd never
live in a house like this, but he wasn't sure he wanted to. He
liked his job and life, and if that meant he didn't live this
kind of high-class lifestyle, then so be it.

He just hoped Lois was still here. A few days after the
anniversary party, Luthor apparently decided they needed a
vacation and came to this house. The history of this house was
interesting as well. A string of crime bosses had owned it
throughout its history, meaning, of course, that it was exactly
the house Luthor needed. Or at least what he understood Luthor
would need now that he was fully aware of the kind of monster
they were dealing with.

Henderson had allowed him one squad car with two cops to see what
they could find. Perry and Jimmy rode in the back on the way to
the house. When the car stopped near the front entrance, he had
to wait until one of the cops opened the door for him.

Jimmy was worried about what would be waiting for him when he
knocked on the door. To make things easier, he chose to leave his
camera in the police car. He envisioned an angry mob of Luthor's
minions coming after him with the intent to silence the one who
could bring them all down. But, knowing his friends were in
danger, he pushed it aside and followed one of the cops up to the
door while Perry and the other cop walked around the side of the
house.

The cop's knock was assertive, but there was no answer. They
waited a few seconds before he knocked again. Just when they were
sure no one would answer, a man dressed like a butler opened the
door. Jimmy's eyes widened in surprise. A butler?

"Can I help you?" the man asked eyeing first the cop, then
Jimmy. He even sounded the way a butler sounded in Jimmy's
imagination.

Jimmy swallowed before asking, "Is Lois Lane here?"

"I'm sorry, it is much too early for any interruptions at this
time," the butler answered in a polite yet stiff voice.
"Perhaps you'd like to return at a more reasonable--"

"We have reason to believe she's being held here against her
will," the cop interrupted.

The butler looked affronted as he took in a sharp breath. "I beg
your pardon, sir, but no such thing would ever take place
here."

Jimmy rolled his eyes. "Can we please just talk to her?"

The butler turned his flinty eyes to him and opened his mouth
ready with some retort when a thundering blast shook them all.
Looks of surprise and concern covered all of their faces, and the
cop ran quickly back to the squad car.

Jimmy heard him radio for back-up and spout off the address as he
looked in the direction he was certain the sound had come from.
Running through the snow to the edge of the property that butted
the top of an escarpment, Jimmy peered down the frosted slope at
what was most likely the point of the blast.

The land below was a floodplain, flat and shimmering with snow
that the rising sun now illuminated. A house much smaller than
this one sat with a gaping hole in the back side. An area of
melted snow shaped like a sunburst surrounded it. He spotted
three figures laying lifeless in the snow and a fourth standing
some yards away. Unable to tell who any of them were, he knew one
thing was certain.

He was too late.

If only he'd figured this out earlier.

"What happened?" Perry asked, breathing hard as he came up to
stand beside him. "Oh my God. You don't think..."

Jimmy looked over at this man that had always served as his
father figure and knew that he was thinking the same thing. "How
do we get down there?" Jimmy asked in a panic.

The two ran back to the cops who were climbing back into the cop
car. "Wait here!" one yelled to them with his hand up as they
approached.

"No!" Jimmy shook his head adamantly, refusing to stop. He
opened the car door when he reached it and climbed inside despite
the officer's protest.

"You have to take us with you," Perry asserted. "Lois is our
friend! If you don't take us with you, it's Henderson you'll
have to answer to because we all know I won't let this go."

The two officers exchanged a look before one nodded. "Buckle
up," he instructed, doing the same. "But once we get there you
two will have to stay in the car until we secure the area."

Jimmy opened his mouth to protest but was silenced by the hand
Perry placed on his arm.

The cop continued. "After we've checked on any victims and
preserved any evidence and know that another blast isn't coming,
one of us will come back to let you out."

Perry nodded. "We understand," he said, turning to glare at
Jimmy.

"Yeah, okay."

The car ride over was short and fast. Jimmy prayed that Lois
would be alright. That they would find her, undo whatever it was
Luthor had done, find CK and put everything back to normal. As
they came down the street and pulled into the drive, Jimmy saw
the flashing lights of emergency vehicles off in the distance.
Relief that help was on the way washed over him.

"I hope she's okay," he whispered.

"I'm sure she is," Perry said. "She's the strongest person I
know."

Jimmy fidgeted with his camera as he tried his hardest to wait
patiently in the car. After what he was sure were hours, one of
the cops came back to let them out. "I think your friend is
around back," he said. "Keep away from anything marked."

Jimmy nodded his agreement, dropped his camera on the floor of
the car, and took off sprinting around the house, shouting
Lois's name.

When he came around the corner, two figures sat near the edge of
the melted snow. One of the figures was most definitely Lois, and
she was nearly embracing the other. Anxious to get to her, he
kept running and shouting. As he neared, he recognized the other
person as none other than Clark. He stopped a few feet in front
of them, looking first to Lois and then to CK.

"CK?!?" Jimmy couldn't keep the surprise from his voice. He
had been sure he would have to wait to be able to see his best
friend again, *after *getting Lois back to normal. But here he
was. Jimmy shook his head. Leaning his hands on his knees, he
took several deep breaths before he tried to speak. "What
did...? Why are you...?"

"Jimmy, calm down." Lois smiled as she put her hand up and
patted his arm. "What are you doing here?"

He looked around at the scattered debris and the paramedics and
firemen moving about the scene. "I came to save you," he
answered. He looked at her then and realized he sounded like a
lunatic. Shaking his head, he tried again. "I mean, I thought
you were in trouble."

"Is everyone here alright?" a paramedic interrupted, tossing a
blanket around Lois first, then Clark.

"Lois!" Perry called from behind him. "Clark?!" he said with
the same surprised confusion Jimmy had expressed. "Great shades
of Elvis! What are you doing here?"

Jimmy looked to Clark who, along with the bruising on his face,
appeared to be in some pain as he moved his arms to grab the
blanket. "I think CK is hurt," Jimmy said to the paramedic,
trying to be helpful, kneeling beside him.

"It's okay," CK said, waving the paramedic away. "It's just
a scratch."

"We can give you a lift to the hospital to get you checked
out," the paramedic suggested.

"No!" Lois and Clark shouted in unison.

Jimmy smiled and looked from Clark to Lois. Everything would be
fine.

***

Lois reached to squeeze Clark's hand reassuringly. "No, he's
fine," she told the paramedic in as calm a voice as she could.
"I'll take care of him."

The paramedic nodded and left, and she was relieved at having
dodged the need to answer some difficult questions. She was sure,
now that she understood the nature of Clark's... condition, that
they would be able to find a way to get him back to his version
of normal. Then, any injuries he had right now would be history.

She let out a breath and watched Clark as his eyes followed the
firefighters and paramedics. Turning her own eyes to the scene,
she saw what a bleak picture it was. Some first responders were
putting out the small fires that remained in and around the
house. Others were moving debris. Two policemen were laying a
blanket over Lex's body. Three paramedics were working on
putting Scott on a stretcher.

"Hell's bells! What in tarnation went on here?" Perry asked,
looking around as well.

"A... weapon exploded," she said simply. Remembering Jimmy's
comment about why he was there, she looked in his direction and
asked, "How did you know we were in trouble?"

"I didn't know *both* of you were in trouble," he said as he
reached a hand out to Clark to help him up. "I can't believe
you're here, Clark."

"To be honest, Jimmy, me neither," Clark admitted with a
chuckle.

"Lois," Jimmy started, looking back at her as Perry helped her
to her feet. She could tell he was nervous about what he was
about to say. "I don't know how to tell you this," he started
again, "but Luthor is a monster, and he kidnapped you, and I
don't even know what all he's done..." He stopped when she
tossed her head back and huffed. "You know? How?"

"Scott," she said.

"Your cameraman??"

"Yeah." She had no intention of explaining further now, but she
could tell Jimmy was dying to know. "How do *you* know?" she
asked, deferring his next question.

"It was an accident," he said, shaking his head. "I was
investigating a medical malpractice case and remembered
everything yesterday."

"The kid insisted I listen to Nat King Cole all night until it
worked on me, too," Perry added, looking sideways at Jimmy.

"I don't know if Henderson found the right song yet," Jimmy
finished. Lois saw Jimmy glance at his best friend. "Are you
guys okay?"

"We're fine, Jimmy," Clark said. "We've been through a lot
just now, and I still don't remember everything yet." Clark
smiled, but Lois could see right through him. She naturally moved
closer to Clark. She felt his surprise but was comforted when he
wrapped his blanketed arm around her. Nestled at his side, they
walked behind Perry and Jimmy up the steps beside the house.

"Do you remember that you guys are married?" Perry asked,
looking back over his shoulder.

She felt Clark stiffen, and they both stopped moving forward.

"What?" Lois asked. She shook her head. She knew there were
holes, but how could she not remember an event that important?
Why hadn't it been one of the first memories to return?

"It was the week before Superman left," Jimmy explained.

"But I remember him leaving." She frowned.

"You really didn't remember that?" he asked, looking from one
to the next.

"I found rings tucked into the wallet Scott gave me," Clark
said. She quickly looked at him as he continued. "He was trying
to convince me, but I didn't believe him... until he showed me
the wallet." Turning to face her, he added, "It had a picture
of us. You were wearing one of them in it. I only thought maybe
we had been engaged. Being married would explain why there were
two rings."

She didn't remember that either. All she could do was stare at
him with her mouth open.

"I guess you guys got sick of waiting," Perry said with a smile
on his face. "It all happened very fast right after we'd all
thought Bad Brain Johnson had killed Lois and Superman. Nice
little ceremony near that fountain you're so fond of at
Centennial Park. Just a few of us there." He and Jimmy turned to
continue toward the front of the house. And she felt Clark pull
her along.

*Married*? Stunned by this news, she looked around at the scene
as they ambled slowly. She saw countless emergency vehicles
parked at odd angles in odd places. The chaotic arrangement
resembled the jumbled mess in her mind, and she suddenly felt
overwhelmed by everything. She stumbled, and Clark caught her.

*Just like he always has*.

That thought only exacerbated the problem, reminding her that
things hadn't been that way for two months, and the familiar
queasiness she'd felt the first time her memories came back
assaulted her. Would he still be there when he found out?

She stumbled again and this time, Clark looked at her. The look
in his eyes was uncertain, and she wondered if he had similar
thoughts coursing through his head. What had happened to him
while they were apart? It couldn't be nearly as devastating as
her story. Could it?

"Perry? Jimmy?" he called to them. "Would you mind letting the
police know we're going to go over there and sit for a bit?" He
nodded his head toward a snow-covered bench down a path that led
to what was probably a beautiful garden in the spring.

"Sure, Clark," Perry said, nodding.

The crunch of the snow wasn't enough to distract Lois from her
worries. She clung to Clark for both warmth and strength. But she
wasn't sure she would be able to talk about any of this yet. Not
when her stomach was in knots. She hadn't even had a chance to
think things through on her own.

When they reached the bench, Clark used his other blanketed arm
to brush the snow away, and they sat side by side. Clark leaned
closer and draped his arms and blanket around her. He held her
like he was afraid that she would disappear or leave if he let
go. And while it felt amazing to be close to him again, there was
so much standing in the way.

And they were *married*?

"Oh Lois, I'm sorry," he breathed into her hair. Tears
immediately began welling in her eyes. "I'm so sorry. I never
should have left. It was a trick, and I didn't see it." She
felt a small shake of his head. "None of this would have
happened if I hadn't left. I'm so sorry," he whispered again.

"No," she interrupted, her voice cracking, "I told you to
go." She wiped at the tears streaming down her face and shivered
but couldn't tell if it was from the cold or something else.

"And... seeing as we're *married*..." Clark began with a
smile, but it changed to a frown as he pulled back slightly, "I
have to be honest with you about something."

Lois frowned, afraid of what he was going to say.

"Lana..." he said.

"Lana?" Lois repeated. Clark's old girlfriend from Smallville.
She couldn't imagine why he would be bringing her up. Unless...
Her stomach roiled.

"She's been..." Clark began, looking ashamed, "staying with
me. We just happened to be in the same place and... But *nothing*
happened." He shook his head adamantly before he closed his eyes
and let out a sigh. He looked towards his feet and chuckled.
"Lois, she had been staying at my apartment, up until just
before you showed up in Columbia. She... heard me talking to
you... in my sleep. I didn't understand it then, but I do
now."

"Clark--" she started to say but stopped, choking on the words
when she realized what *she* would have to say. She looked away
from him at the long shadows the rising sun was creating on the
snow.

They still had holes in their memories. They still needed to put
the rest of the pieces together and make sense of everything that
happened. Clark was making an effort to be honest with her, but
she hadn't yet told him what had happened to her. And, while she
knew she needed to, she wasn't sure she could do that.

"Lois?" he said so gently it hurt. "I'm sorry, I had no idea
what was going on. I am just relieved. I was so... miserable
myself... that I didn't want ..." He turned her face toward his
with a caring finger and looked directly into her eyes as fresh
tears slid down her cheeks. "What is it?"

How could she tell him she had been *married* to Lex? Did he
already know?

Did he know that, in every sense of the word, she'd been
*married* to Lex? Worse, according to him, she was carrying his
child. How would they get past this? She closed her eyes in an
effort to curb the nausea, but scenes from the evening just
played over and over in her mind. She was unable to stop the
fresh sobs that came forth.

Clark pulled her close exactly as she needed him to. "Tell me?
Please?" he asked.

But she couldn't say it.

"It's nothing," she lied. "I'm just so glad I finally have
you back." She still couldn't stem the sobs that seemed to be
worsening.

"This doesn't seem like nothing, Lois," he said. "What is
it?" He released her and held her at arm's length, but Lois
lowered her head to keep him from being able to see through her.
She didn't know how to tell him.

"No," she cried, pushing Clark away. She felt intense guilt and
a need to get away from Clark before she hurt him again.

Taking deep breaths, she got up as quickly as she could and
stepped away from him. But there was nowhere for her to go. The
fight left her. It was all too much. She sank to the ground and
wrapped herself tightly in her blanket.

***

Chapter 32

Clark was stunned by her sudden rejection but quickly got up and
followed her, pushing away the thought that she didn't want him
to do so. He approached her slowly, like he would a scared animal
that he didn't want to frighten away, and knelt beside her,
peering at her face. "Lois, is it Lana?" he asked.

He felt a small bit of relief when she shook her head. He placed
his hand gently on her knee to comfort her, but she swiped it
away. His heart ached. "Lois," he said as compassionately as he
could, "what is it?" He needed to know and knew she needed to
tell him, but he didn't know what was preventing her from doing
so.

She turned her head to the side and cried even harder. He made a
quick decision he hoped he wouldn't regret. The small gasp that
escaped her told him that she was surprised he had picked her
up.

She struggled against him. "Let go of me!" she cried. She
pushed and flailed, but he was stronger. Even without superpowers
and with injuries, he still had the strength of a normal man. He
held her tightly but gently as he walked back to the bench. "Let
me go..." she demanded again.

"No," he said assertively, "I won't let go." She continued
to struggle as he sat down. He held her in his lap and felt her
began to tire. If she was worried about how he would respond to
whatever it was she needed to tell him, he could allay some of
her fears. "Lois, listen to me," he started. She stopped
struggling, but her breathing remained fast. "I don't care what
it is. Whatever it is or was, it wasn't your fault." He spoke
from the heart and allowed every bit of sincerity he had within
him to soak his words. She seemed to calm down, and he continued,
"Especially if it happened in the last two months. Neither of us
were ourselves." He took her chin and turned her face to his.
The fear in her eyes was palpable. "*Nothing* will change how I
feel about you. I *love* you, Lois."

At this she relaxed. He held her eyes with his and did everything
he could to let her see the truth of his words. *Please believe
me*.

She closed her eyes tightly, squeezing tears out that ran down
her cheeks.

When she opened her eyes, he could see the pain she was feeling,
sense her fear. He wanted to fix it for her, to fix everything,
to go back in time and change every last thing to the way it used
to be. "Tell me, please," he urged. "Whatever happened," he
assured her, "we'll work through it. There isn't *anything*
that would be too much for us. Even without all of my memories, I
*know* that is true." The fear in her eyes seemed to dim a
little.

She took a few more deep breaths, further calming herself. He
relaxed his arms but couldn't let her go. He suspected she
needed confirmation that he meant what he said.

She looked down at her fingers that she was wringing in her lap.
"Clark..." she began slowly as if she were weighing her words
before saying them. "I -- I was..." she swallowed. "Lex made
me think I was married to him."

"I know," he said simply. "I don't care. That wasn't you."

"He said I'm pregnant," she reminded him, finally looking him
in the face while biting her lower lip.

"I know that too. You said it was something you made up."

"I thought it was." She slipped herself off his lap to sit next
to him instead, leaving a cold emptiness in her place. He reached
for her hands, suddenly worried she'd run away again. The fact
that she didn't pull away and instead squeezed his hands eased
some of his concern.

"After the explosion, when I was trying to get the kryptonite
pieces away from you," she continued, turning her face away from
him. "He was still alive." She shook her head. "He told me I
*am* pregnant." More tears slowly fell down her cheek.

"How could he know?" Clark asked gently as he reached to wipe
one away.

"I don't know." Lois shook her head. "I don't know," she
repeated. She quickly looked at him with trepidation. "What if
he's right?"

Instantly, he was filled with rage, wishing he had access to his
powers and that Lex wasn't already dead. He let out an angry
yell as he looked heavenward.

How dare Lex do this to them? He stood up, considering what this
meant. He understood that for the past two months, they had been
living lives not their own. He could see the devilish sneer on
Luthor's face as he delivered the cruel blow. For that psychotic
lunatic to leave her with such a monumental piece of information
in a situation like this made his blood boil.

"Clark?" Lois called to him. He still had one of her hands in
his and felt her gentle pull. When he looked at her face, he saw
the worry in her eyes. She hung her head, defeated, but he
quickly pulled her up to stand in front of him.

***

Startled, she looked for any sign of what might be going through
his head. Unexpectedly, his expression became understanding and
regretful. Was he struggling to find words to tell her he
couldn't be with her anymore? That this *was* too big for them
to get through?

"No, Lois," he said, shaking his head and pulling her closer.
"I'm not angry at you." With that he brought her hands to his
chest, holding them tenderly. "You didn't... This wasn't..."
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. When he opened them,
he looked directly at her. "I remember when we were in the
clouds, and you told me that you love me. I don't doubt it at
all. I don't think for one minute that you'd ever do anything
like this -- cheating or having an affair or whatever you're
thinking you did. That is not what happened here. I *know*
that."

He gently kissed her fingers, and the familiar flutters it caused
warmed her. How did he know what she'd been thinking? If only
that were the only problem here.

"But if I am pregnant with--"

"Lois, I just found out we're *married*," he interrupted,
"and I am never giving that up." His face lit up with a smile,
and he wrapped his arms around her. "We'll get through this,
all of it, *together*. Just like we'll work to get our memories
all in order. And just like we'll deal without the
superpowers."

She tried to blink away the tears filling her eyes. She'd
forgotten about the tattoo she had seen when she first found him
lying in the snow. "Clark," she half sobbed, splaying her
fingers on his chest. "I think I know what happened to your
powers."

His eyes grew wide, and he pulled slightly away from her.
"What?" he said, his brows drawing into a frown.

"When I found you, you were on your stomach and under your shirt
I saw a tattoo." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand as
his mouth slowly opened. "In the sunlight, it sparkled red and
green. I think they tattooed you with kryptonite." She sniffed
the last of her tears away.

"What did it look like?" he asked quietly.

She smiled at his unexpected question. "A phoenix," she said.
"Lex always thought of himself that way."

Clark shook his head. "He really was a monster, wasn't he?" He
took a deep breath and drew her closer. "Don't worry, Lois. It
will all work out. It always does."

And she believed him.

He leaned closer to her as if he might kiss her but stopped
suddenly, smiling at her. It was then she heard the approach of a
group that she would be willing to bet money included Jimmy.

***

Perry's own mind still struggled to keep up with everything that
had happened. It was all so unbelievable. The *Daily Planet*
would have headlines for weeks out of this. He and Jimmy walked
with Inspector Bill Henderson around to the side of the house
where Clark had said he wanted to talk with Lois. The sun was
continuing its ascent above the horizon now and, though it
promised an increase in temperature, they needed to leave this
mess and get somewhere warmer.

Perry saw the two love birds standing in the snow, heads
together, and slowed his pace to give them more time alone. He
could only imagine what they must be going through. He knew
things couldn't go right back to the way they had been, but he
hoped the connection they had, which he had watched grow between
them from simple partnership to a budding romance to the real
deal, would be able to weather this storm... this category five
hurricane.

"So, you've remembered everything, Henderson?" Perry asked,
stalling. He gripped the rail next to the steps and hobbled
slowly down them, trying to make it seem like he just couldn't
go any faster.

"Mostly," the police inspector replied, slowing as well. His
face held a stern expression, though Perry hadn't ever seen it
any other way. "I still can't believe Luthor got away with so
much. We're going to be cleaning up this mess for a while."

"Is he really dead this time?" Jimmy asked. He was behind Perry
and stood waiting a step up for Perry to get to the next. The
glint Perry saw in Jimmy's eye as he watched Lois and Clark in
the distance told Perry he understood the real reason for the
slow pace.

"Yeah. We're going to let the local police take care of that
here." Henderson may have smiled at that, or, at least, the
stern expression relaxed. "Less chance of Luthor's hands
being... having been in the pockets of these guys."

"Good idea." Perry begrudgingly reached the bottom step and was
forced to walk a little faster.

Lois and Clark shifted to stand next to each other, facing the
approaching crowd. He could tell Lois had been crying, and they
both looked tired as hell. Perry's heart went out to them. He
would be there to help them in whatever way he could, though.
He'd get his top reporters back and do everything in his power
to get things back to whatever their new normal now was.

"Lane and Kent," Henderson greeted, reaching out to shake their
hands. "I have to admit, I am very glad to see both of you
again."

"Thanks, Henderson," Clark said. His hand worked its way out
from under the blanket to shake the proffered hand before going
back underneath. "Any word on Scott?"

"He's still unconscious. They're about to transport him to
MetroGen," Henderson answered.

"Is he going to be okay?" Lois asked.

"They need to rule out head injuries and run some other tests.
We don't even know what was injected into him yet."

Perry could see the concern on both of their faces and once again
wondered what happened to get them all here. It must have been
quite an adventure.

"What do we have to do to get out of here?" Clark asked.

"Well, we will eventually need your statements," he explained.
"But White here says he's not letting you talk to us until
you're ready." Henderson eyed Perry which only made Perry
smile. "No more than 24 hours," he added.

"My two best reporters need to take care of themselves first,"
Perry asserted. "I'll take them home."

***

Chapter 33

Perry didn't take them home. How could he? Neither of them
really had a home any more. Lois had no interest in ever setting
foot in Lex's house ever again. And Clark no longer lived in
Metropolis.

Instead, Perry dropped them off at his fishing cabin that just
happened to be on the route back to Metropolis, and he offered to
make them some lunch before heading back to town.

Lois spent much of the time since they left the house at the
bottom of the bluff crying silently while Clark held her hand as
they rode in the back seat of the borrowed car. Every time she
thought she'd pulled herself together, more tears would come.
She hoped she would have more control over her emotions once the
shock of everything that had happened that morning wore off.

They stopped a few places on the way to the cabin to get a few
necessary items that neither of them had at this point. Clark
kept a tight yet gentle grip on her hand as they shopped for
necessities -- clothing, toiletries. Nat King Cole CDs.

A pregnancy test.

And Clark. Clark was a constant source of strength, and though
she didn't understand how he managed it when everything was so
muddled, she needed him to be strong. Maybe it was his Smallville
upbringing, the resiliency that his parents had instilled in him.
Maybe it was the innate goodness he possessed that pushed him to
help in a situation he thought he shouldn't be in and didn't
understand. It didn't matter why. What mattered was that he was
there.

*What can I say, dear, after I say I'm sorry?*

*What can I do to prove it to you, I'm sorry?*

*I didn't mean to ever be mean to you*

*If I didn't care I wouldn't act like I do*

*As they drove to the cabin, Perry played the new CDs in the car.
None of the songs seemed to have any effect on Clark, but they
did bring up all sorts of memories for Lois, from her childhood
to this morning's misadventures. The mind-boggling onslaught of
memories threatened to overwhelm her. She snuggled against
Clark's side, staring out at the passing landscape, trying to
think instead about the safe haven she found in his arms.*

*They reached the cabin just before lunchtime. Perry ushered them
in and gave them a quick tour of the tiny getaway. Lois wasn't
able to pay attention. She numbly followed them around as Clark
politely asked questions and then directed her to the bathroom.
Perry went to make lunch for them.*

*The cabin featured a small sun-room that faced west. Barely
large enough to hold the two Adirondack chairs and table, it was
at least warm despite the wintry conditions outside. Lois relaxed
in one of the chairs, her feet tucked under her, staring out at
the snow-covered landscape. Clark lounged in the other beside
her. He had moved the small table out of the way, pulled his
chair up next to hers, and intertwined their fingers.*

*They waited in awkward silence for what surely would be the
longest five minutes of her entire life.*

*The stars would cry in the blue if you said no*

*Their tears would fall like the dew if you said no*

*The fragrance of the flowers would fade if you turned away*

*And the warmth of the summer day would leave me so cold*

"Are you okay?" he asked quietly, squeezing her hand.

"Um... yeah," she responded, not sure if it was the right
answer.

"Lois," he said, drawing her eyes to him. "It will all work
out."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do." He looked into her eyes as he brought her hand up
to kiss and then tenderly caressed her fingers.

She leaned her head back, unsure. Her nerves were in shambles.
She'd replayed everything in her mind that would have indicated
she was pregnant. It was really only the nausea and vomiting. And
the fact that she really couldn't remember the last time she'd
had a period. But there was so much she didn't really remember
that she couldn't be sure if it had or had not happened. Her
stomach groaned now, but it was still empty and the stress of
waiting surely played a role in that.

*The countless stars in the heavens are trembling above*

*So don't say no, I beg of you, don't say no to my love*

She glanced over at Clark. He held her hand to his chest, and she
could feel his strong and steady heartbeat. He leaned his head
back on the chair and let out a deep breath while closing his
eyes. His face was relaxed, and even without a smile, he looked
happy.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked.

"You," he said without moving, without hesitation. The corners
of his mouth rose. "How we're married. How much I love you. How
lucky I am to have you back."

"How can you be so calm right now?" she asked, shaking her
head.

*You're my everything*

*Underneath the sun*

*You're my everything*

*Rolled up into one*

He slowly rolled his head toward her, but his unfocused eyes and
frown told her he was remembering something. She sat up,
welcoming the distraction, and faced him. Seconds later, he shook
his head and saw her. A smile grew across his face.

"What is it?" she asked, eager to know what he now knew.

"Our first date." He reached for her face and caressed her
cheek. "You slammed the door in my face." He chuckled then, and
it lightened her heart. "Do you remember?"

She nodded as she smiled. Her heart had been a jumble of emotions
then, feeling so much attraction toward her partner, but not
understanding him. "I didn't know what to do with myself. I was
so scared." She laughed then too, and the weight on her
shoulders continued to lift. She took a deep breath, feeling like
she might be ready to face their future together. "How much time
do we have left?" she asked.

Slipping his fingers to the back of her neck, he pulled her
closer and gently pressed his lips to hers. "All the time in the
world," he said.

She smiled at his non-answer. "No, I mean the test."

As if on cue, the digital timer that sat on the table Clark had
moved out of the way dinged, and Lois felt her heart stop.

"It can wait," he said, kissing her again. "I don't care what
the answer is."

She smiled, and then she whispered against his lips, "But I have
to know."

***

He kissed her once more before sitting back in his chair. He
could see the tears threatening to spill from her eyes, and it
made his heart ache. He wished he could take it all from her. He
wished he'd never left. He wished he still had his powers. He'd
do anything to fix this for her. But he couldn't play the
'if-only' game. It was the way it was. What he could do was be
there, supporting her, loving her.

"Do you want me to check it?" he asked.

She nodded, and a tear escaped. He released her hands to stand up
and watched as she swept them away.

"Come with me," he said, holding his hand out to her.

She looked at his outstretched hand and took it as she raised her
eyes to meet his. Her hand trembled as he tucked it under his
arm. They walked slowly together through the cabin, the smell of
chicken and dumplings in the air. Perry wasn't paying any
attention to them, thankfully. He was in the equally small
kitchen off of the main room, humming Elvis tunes as he cooked.

A few steps and they would be there at the threshold of the
bathroom -- the threshold that would determine the rest of their
lives.

"No," she said suddenly, tugging on his arm, stopping him. "I
don't want to know anymore." She shook her head and tried to
back away, but he kept hold of her hand.

"Lois, it will be okay," he soothed.

"No, it *won't*!" He could hear the panic in her soft voice.
She yanked her hand from his arm and began gesturing with them as
she explained, "If I am pregnant with that slime ball's evil
spawn, I'll have it months from now--"

"Lois..." he tried to interrupt.

"--and you're going to leave me once you figure out that you
don't want anything to do with it or me--"

"Lois," he tried again, putting his hands on her shoulders.

"--and then I'll be alone and have to take care of it by
myself--"

"Lois!" he said, lifting her face to his. "Stop!"

Her rant stalled. Her eyes were wide with worry, her brows
raised. "I can't do it," she cried.

"Yes, you *can*, Lois," Clark started, determined. Grasping her
face gently with his hands, he continued, "I will *not* leave
you. So what if you are pregnant? That baby will be half you and
*anything* that comes from you will be amazing, and I'll love it
just as much as I love you. No matter what."

He paused and dared to smirk at her, sliding his fingers to the
back of her neck and into her hair. "Besides, according to
Perry, we were married for a whole week before I left. You
couldn't possibly think we wouldn't have ..." He let the idea
float between them and smiled as he saw understanding dawn on her
face in the form of a blush.

"Clark," she started, but he didn't let her finish.

"I hate that I can't remember it right now, but there is no
doubt in my mind that it happened. Maybe you were already
pregnant." He hesitated a moment, considering whether he should
reveal his next thought. But if it alleviated any of her anxiety,
it would be worth it. "And... if you weren't and you are now...
Well, maybe it's a blessing in disguise. I'm not human. What if
this is the only way..."

Her hand on his cheek stopped him. Her eyes fixed on his, and he
took a breath to steady himself.

"That's how I've been able to remain calm through all this,
Lois -- I have hope. And I refuse to let that *slime ball*, as
you put it, ruin our life together. It's a choice." He kissed
her then, there in the hall outside the bathroom of the cabin
they would stay in for a few days while putting their life back
together. "Choose me," he pleaded as they separated.

She pulled back and looked up into his eyes again. "Okay," she
said softly. And he accepted this as a small victory, the first
of many to come.

"Okay," he repeated. Releasing her, he took her hand once more
as he opened the bathroom door and picked up the pregnancy test
that lay face down on the counter. He turned to face her, keeping
it face down between them. He gave her a reassuring smile before
turning it over.

"Positive," they said in unison.

"Hey, you two!" Perry called from the kitchen as Clark smiled
at Lois. "Soup's on! Get yourselves comfy on the couch, and
I'll bring it to ya."

Lois, her eyes wide and face pale, didn't seem to hear the
announcement or see Clark's reaction. Standing there with her
mouth open, he'd never seen her look more beautiful. However
this had happened, he really did see it as a blessing.

Clark pitched the pregnancy test into the trash and led her to
the small living room. He sat next to her on the couch, her hand
still in his, as Perry came in from the kitchen carrying a bowl
for each of them.

"Lois?" Perry asked when she didn't reach for the bowl.

Clark took the bowls from Perry and set them on the small coffee
table in the middle of the small room. While he was bursting at
the seams to tell everyone, truly embracing this as he said he
would, he wasn't sure if Lois wanted to tell anyone at all. So,
he waited for her to answer.

"What's the matter, honey?" Perry asked as he sat on the
corner of the small coffee table.

"I'm pregnant," she said. She squeezed Clark's hand and
looked to him with just barely a smile. Clark couldn't stop his
smile and reached his other arm around her.

"Oh...well..." Perry stammered, sitting up straight.

"Looks like we'll be starting our family sooner rather than
later." She turned to face Perry and smiled. A genuine, if
reserved, smile.

"I guess congratulations are in order?" Perry asked. At her
nod, he patted her knee and reached to shake Clark's hand.

"Thanks, Chief," she said, letting out a deep breath.

"It's a lot to take in," Clark admitted.

"Of course, it is." Perry chuckled. "I guess I'll get out of
here so you two can... uh... take it in." He placed his hands on
his knees and pushed himself up to a standing position. Gathering
his things, he continued, "There's a truck parked out back, and
the keys are in the kitchen drawer. You guys stay as long as you
need. We'll get everything worked out later."

"Thanks, Perry," Clark said.

They stayed seated on the small couch, and Perry shut the door
behind him. Clark's eyes never left Lois. He knew she was still
in shock over everything, just as he was. "You told him," he
said.

"I'm sorry. Every excuse I thought of was lame, and I couldn't
think of anything else to say, and you know he would have just
seen right through it anyway. Hell, he probably knew before we
got here," she babbled, pausing to catch a breath before looking
at him. "You don't mind, do you?"

"No," he said, his smile growing.

"I'm glad you're so happy about all this," she said, her
sarcasm evident. "What kind of weird family are we going to
make?"

"I don't care," he affirmed, raising his eyebrows. "It will
be *our* family."

Lois shook her head. "How can you be so happy? I mean, I get
what you said earlier, but... So much has happened in the last
twenty-four hours. All I feel like doing is screaming and weeping
and throwing things and laying on the floor staring at the
ceiling and you--" she paused and poked him in the chest,
"--*you* are almost grinning ear to ear, and I just don't get
it."

"Lois," he began, dropping the grin and turning to face her,
"I have literally just crawled out of a hole that had me
questioning why I was even alive. Even though I haven't
remembered much, I know enough. After I saw you this morning,
once you touched me ..." He took her hand and began tracing
circles on her palm. "I knew that everything I thought I knew
about you had to be wrong. And now, I have more than I thought
I'd ever have a week ago." He paused and shrugged, allowing the
smile to return. "Maybe I'm on some kind of high, but I hope it
doesn't wear off anytime soon. You are worried enough for the
both of us."

Lois frowned, and Clark watched her mouth open and her lips twist
as she decided how to respond. He had the distinct impression
he'd seen that exact look before and wished he could remember
it.

"You questioned why you were alive?" she said softly.

"I was completely miserable." As he leaned in, he traced her
jaw with his fingers and ran his thumb across her lower lip.
"I'm lost without you."

"Me too," she breathed, leaning closer to him and meeting his
eyes.

Her eyes glistened as her lips begged him to kiss her. Oh, how he
missed her. "I love you," he whispered before kissing her.
Something in the way she responded was so familiar and yet so
new, and he savored it.

***

Chapter 34

January 25, 1996

"One more," Clark said, pushing the eject button on the stereo
in the borrowed truck. They were nearly at S.T.A.R. Labs in
Metropolis. The first stop in their new reality would be at Dr.
Klein's office. And an interesting meeting it would be.

"Thank God," Lois said, raising her hand up as she veered
around a slow-moving car on the highway. She knew that, to an
outsider, it might have looked as though she suffered from road
rage, but instead she was merely relieved.

"It's really just the last CD we *have*, not the last one,"
Clark pointed out as he inserted the CD into the slot. "We'll
have to get more."

"Oh," she said sheepishly, taking the exit ramp that would lead
them almost directly to the parking garage at S.T.A.R. Labs. It
wasn't that she didn't like the songs. In fact, she really
enjoyed spending all that time yesterday cuddled with Clark at
the fishing cabin, listening to romantic music and reminiscing
every time another memory emerged. Laughing at one, crying at
another, she felt closer to him now despite the missing puzzle
pieces that remained.

*It was just one of those things, just one of those crazy
flings*

*One of those bells that now and then rings, just one of those
things*

"We don't have to listen anymore," Clark said nonchalantly.

"What?" Lois asked, taken aback. Looking over in time to see
Clark snap the CD case shut, she also caught the tiniest bit of a
smile at the corner of his mouth. "Did you have something else
in mind?" she asked as she turned into the parking garage.

Clark twisted his face in thought. "Well, making new memories
sounds a bit cheesy." He chuckled. "So that's not it." He
smiled as he turned to look out of the window.

Lois couldn't stop the giggle from escaping and wasn't
surprised when Clark joined in. They continued listening to the
end of the song as Lois found a spot to park. They exited the
truck and began walking toward the building hand in hand.
"Seriously though," she started, "I wish I could remember our
wedding."

"And the time between it and when I left..." Clark said as he
looked sideways at her. His free hand came up to lightly brush
her arm, and it sent shivers through her.

She felt the blush creeping up her neck and tried to ignore it as
she pulled open the door, stepped into the lobby, and walked up
to the front desk. It wasn't long before they were checked in
and riding the elevator up to the floor that held Dr. Klein's
lab.

*And if I can make it there*

*I'm gonna make it anywhere*

*It's up to you, New York, New York!*

"Hm, sounds like they might have more songs for us to listen to
here," Lois commented.

"I don't think Nat King Cole sang this one."

"I know, but it fits doesn't it?"

Clark chuckled and pulled her in close. "Like this?"

"Like this," she breathed. Reaching up to meet his lips, she
vaguely registered a familiar intro as the next song began and
closed her eyes.

*Moon and mist, Make rainbows in your hair*

*When I see your smile, There's sunlight everywhere*

Clark's hold on her changed fractionally to something more
alarming. She opened her eyes to see that familiar clouded look
and watched as expressions flitted across his face. The return of
his memories was short lived each time, but it was an IV drip,
never releasing more than a few memories at a time. She steadied
them as he staggered toward the wall of the elevator, hoping that
the elevator ride would last until it passed.

The elevator slowed as he shook his head. When she saw his eyes
focus on her, he smiled. The elevator doors opened just then and
as he ushered her forward, he whispered, "Now I've got a
secret."

She glanced at him over her shoulder. "What did you remember?"
she asked quietly.

"Our wedding." He knocked on the door to Dr. Klein's lab,
preventing her from asking more questions, and then opened it to
enter.

***

"Dr. Klein," Lois said as she entered the office.

"Just a moment." Dr. Klein stood at a lab table covered in
equipment that included a laser and a centrifuge. He finished
marking something down on a clipboard as he looked back and forth
between it and a small display on the centrifuge. As he finished
writing, he stood up and turned toward them.

"Miss Lane!" His excitement was tangible as he eagerly greeted
her. "Oh, I mean Mrs. Kent!" The correction surprised Clark
and, judging by the look on Lois's face, it surprised her as
well. "Wait! You haven't remembered that yet?"

"I've been told, but no, I don't remember it yet," Lois
answered quietly. "This is..." She smiled at him before
continuing, "my husband, Clark Kent."

"Dr. Klein." Clark smiled at Lois and reached to shake the
grinning scientist's hand. That was the first time he'd been
introduced as her husband, and he found he loved it. He also
wondered how the scientist would react to the news they were
about to share with him.

"Mr. Kent!" Klein seemed just as excited to meet Clark as he
was to see Lois, but the shock on his face when he looked at
Clark made Clark chuckle. "Wow! You really took a beating,
didn't you?"

"You should see the other guy," Clark said, laughing.

"And have you remembered everything?" Dr. Klein asked.

"Even less than Lois," he answered.

"What a shame," Dr. Klein said as he shook his head. "I'm
sure it will come back to you soon enough. The details from this
Dr. Hightower's machine are fascinating, but it seems as though
it was never meant to be long term."

"I'm sorry?" Clark asked, not sure he heard the doctor
correctly.

"It was never meant to be long term," the doctor repeated.
Clark lifted an eyebrow as he looked at Dr. Klein until he caught
the meaning. "Oh, well, you see, it was a bit like hypnosis with
the keys that undo the changes they made, but the process he used
to change the memories left them completely intact. It was only a
matter of time... months or years... before the brain would right
itself." He smiled at them as he finished his explanation.
"Brains really are very fascinating."

"That's good to know," Clark said, looking at Lois who smiled
at him. "I wonder if Hightower knew that was the case."

"Dr. Klein," Lois started, turning her attention to him, "we
have some other things we wanted to talk to you about today. Two
actually."

"Yes?" He smiled at her, raising his eyebrows.

"It's about Superman," she said.

Dr. Klein's face fell. "You haven't remembered that he left.
Oh, Miss Lane--" He quickly cleared his throat and continued,
"Mrs. Kent, he went to discover whether any other Kryptonians
survived the destruction of his planet. Just before all of this
happened, I came to tell--"

"No, Dr Klein," Clark interrupted. "We know all that. It's
just that..."

"Superman didn't leave," Lois put in.

"He did, Miss...es Kent," Dr. Klein started, correcting himself
again. Clark surreptitiously moved to close the door to the
office, thankful they were alone. "You were there, I was there.
I don't know where Mr. Kent was." He blinked as he said the
last part.

"I was there, too," Clark said, meeting Dr. Klein's
questioning expression. "I'm Superman."

"Please, Mr. Kent," Dr. Klein said, rolling his eyes. "And
I'm The Atom." He turned back to the materials he had on his
work bench and continued whatever he was doing before they
arrived.

"Who?" Lois asked.

"Dr. Klein," Clark cut in to prevent an explanation of who The
Atom was, "I know it's hard to believe, given my face and the
circumstances, but it *is *true. I *am *Superman. I don't have
any powers right now, which is why we're here." The scientist
stopped what he was doing and turned to face him. Clark watched
as Dr. Klein's brows drew together, and he seemed to be
inspecting Clark for a few minutes before he spoke.

"But you did go," Dr. Klein argued. "I prepared you to go,
with help of course, and I watched you leave."

"It was all part of Lex's plan," Lois explained. "He staged
*all *of that."

"But I saw the data myself," he pointed out, taking a seat on
the lab stool nearest his table. "The readout on the computer as
you left Earth's orbit."

Clark shook his head. "After Superman flew away from the dock
that Monday last November, Luthor used kryptonite to bring
Superman... me down. I'm sure the tracking device was destroyed
then. I fly... flew pretty fast so it would be easy to believe it
would seem as though I left."

"And you don't have *any *powers?" Dr. Klein asked with
disbelief written on his face.

"None," Clark confirmed. "But we think we know why, and we're
hoping you can help."

"Of course," Klein seemed to shake himself out of his thoughts.
"I'll do whatever I can."

"Yesterday," Lois began, "when I found Clark on the ground, I
saw this tattoo on his back that sparkled red and green."

"You think it's Kryptonite?!" Dr. Klein exclaimed.

"Yes," Clark said.

"Green *and *red?" Klein mulled over out loud, rubbing his chin
with his hand. "Yes, the combination of the two in close
proximity and with just the right amount..." He stood and began
pacing in the lab, stopping abruptly to face Clark. "And you
are... normal... now?" At Clark's nod, his eyebrows shot up.
"How fascinating. May I see this tattoo?"

"Yeah." After removing his coat, Clark pulled his t-shirt over
his head, exposing the bandage on his chest.

Dr. Klein motioned to the lab stool he'd been sitting on moments
earlier and collected a few items before coming over to examine
him closely. Clark felt the doctor's gloved fingers poking and
prodding the skin between his shoulder blades as the scientist
made various thinking noises.

Clark was surprised at how quiet Lois was being during the exam.
He looked at her to see concern on her face, her eyes glistening.
He reached his hand out to her, and she came to him to grasp it.

"Well, it looks like this will be an easy fix. It appears to be
a simple tattoo. With special ink, of course. The design is a
good one though. I'm afraid, though, that laser treatments are
not going to work with this one." He came around to face Clark
and Lois. "We'll have to remove the entire tattoo... the
old-fashioned way."

Clark grimaced. Lois squeezed his hand, and he let out a long
sigh. "Okay."

"How long do you think it will take him to get back to normal?"
Lois asked. "Well, *his *normal."

"I can't say. After the tattoo is removed, and I see just how
much kryptonite is there, I'll be able to make a better
estimate."

Lois nodded at this and squeezed his hand again.

"Can we do it now?" Clark asked.

"I don't see why not," Dr. Klein said as Lois's eyes widened.
The scientist took a few steps away and then stopped abruptly and
turned back to them. "You said there were two things you wanted
to talk to me about," Dr. Klein added.

"Yes. There's another thing we may need your help with," Clark
started. "We're not sure yet, though."

"Name it." Dr. Klein leaned back on his lab table, listening.

"Lois is pregnant," Clark said as he glanced up to Lois. She
stood there, looking at him with loving eyes, biting her lower
lip. With his help, she was becoming more comfortable with the
situation, but she still needed time. "The baby could be mine,"
he quickly added.

"Oh." Dr. Klein's eyes went wide. "*Could be*?" he
repeated.

"The baby might also be Lex Luthor's," Lois said, a grimace on
her face.

"I see."

Clark chuckled at Dr. Klein's awkward look. "I assume that
since I'm not human, if the baby is mine, the pregnancy could be
complicated."

"You're right," he agreed, nodding. "I'll have to run some
tests. I could take some samples from you while I'm removing the
tattoo. And get some from Lois before you leave?"

Clark nodded as he squeezed Lois's hands. As Dr. Klein scurried
off, Clark prepared himself mentally for what was about to
happen.

***

Clark sat in what looked like a massage chair, with his face
centered on the hole in the head rest and his eyes closed.
They'd moved to a different room on the top floor of the
S.T.A.R. Labs building, which offered quick access to the roof.
Dr. Klein insisted that they be able to get Clark outside quickly
when the procedure was over and expressed his relief that the day
was proving to be sunny even though it was still cold. He had
brought into the room a small chunk of kryptonite in a thick lead
box that sat open to further weaken Clark for the procedure.

Lois gently massaged Clark's fingers as she held his hands in
hers from her seat on a footstool placed just in front of him so
that she could see his face. She was wrapped in a very heavy,
leaded blanket that covered her from her neck to her knees. Dr.
Klein insisted it was a necessary precaution if she wanted to
stay in the room. From her vantage point, she could also see Dr.
Klein scurrying about the lab, collecting the equipment he would
need. She tried not to think about what was about to happen, but
it was hard to ignore.

She watched Dr. Klein approach with a tray and set it on a stand
just to the side of the chair. "I'm going to get started now,"
Dr. Klein announced. "It shouldn't take too long." He paused
and looked at Lois. "Are you sure you want to be here for
this?"

"Yes," she answered, her voice shaking. Dr. Klein nodded and
sat back to begin. She squeezed Clark's hands.

"Lois," Clark whispered.

"What is it?" she asked, leaning closer. She stopped herself
from asking if he wanted her to tell Dr. Klein he changed his
mind. That wouldn't be it; his mind was made up.

"It was a Monday." His voice was faint, but he didn't seem to
struggle to say the words.

"It's good for him to be distracted, Mrs. Kent," Dr. Klein
whispered over Clark's shoulder to her. "Ask him more
questions."

"What was a Monday?" She frowned, wondering if the kryptonite
was muddling his thoughts.

"Our wedding."

She peered up at his face to see a weak smile on his lips, his
eyes still closed. "Which Monday?" she asked.

"November 13th," she heard Clark say. He gasped then as he
flinched, but no other sound came from him. Tears sprang to her
eyes, and she squeezed his hands even harder. "It was at
Centennial Park," he breathed. "Near the ... fountain." His
words sounded like they were being forced through gritted teeth,
but he continued, "That pavilion... just to... the north."

She tried to blink away the tears with little success. Without
relinquishing his hand, she brought hers up close enough to use
her wrist to wipe at her face. "Who..." Her throat was clogged,
and she swallowed to clear it before continuing. "Who was
there?" she asked.

"You."

She gave a half laugh. "Who else?"

"I don't know..." He drew in a sharp breath. "All I saw...
was you."

"And what did I look like?" His hands squeezed hers, and she
rubbed his white knuckles before looking back to his face.

His eyes remained closed. "Beautiful..." he said, the corners
of his mouth curling up even as his eyebrows were knitted in
pain. "Sad... and happy."

Lois opened her mouth to speak, but a lump wedged itself in her
throat, making it impossible for words to escape. Only a muffled
squeak made it through. Dr. Klein made a noise behind Clark,
drawing her attention.

"Sorry," he said. "Almost done now. Just a few more minutes.
Keep him talking."

"You..." he started before she could say anything, "came down
the... sidewalk... with your father."

"I thought you said you didn't see anyone else," she
whispered.

"It's in the ceremony... 'Who gives this woman'... I heard
his... voice."

"Oh," she managed to say. "Do you remember our vows?"

"I found mine ... tucked into my wallet."

"The wallet Scott gave you?"

"Yeah." He squeezed her hands again. "I didn't... know
that's what it was... at first." He winced again. "It's
weird, you know."

"What is?"

"I don't remember meeting you... or falling in love with you...
just bits and... pieces. But I know... I *know *I love you...
more than anything."

She leaned forward and kissed the top of his head.

"I hate to interrupt," Dr. Klein started, "but I'm going to
cover the area with a special polymer that will bind to the wound
and behave like skin until he's healed." Dr. Klein turned away
from them as he spoke. When he turned back around he addressed
Clark. "This will hurt."

Lois braced herself and wondered how Clark was even managing to
stay awake through all of this.

"You..." he said, breathless, "are the... most..." He stopped
as he flinched in pain. Lois brought his hands up, holding them
in front of her chest before he finished his choppy sentence,
"Beautiful... thing I've ever... seen."

"All done," Dr. Klein said. He turned and began piling utensils
on his tray.

Lois released the breath she was holding and kissed Clark's
fingers. As Dr. Klein closed the lid to the kryptonite box and
began wheeling his cart out of the room, Lois stood and pressed
another kiss to the top of Clark's head.

***

Clark released her hands and attempted to sit up. He braced
himself with his arms on the head rest and raised his head to
meet Lois's face.

She placed her hands on either side of his face and kissed his
lips gently. "Even without your powers, you are amazing," she
said as she pulled away, making him chuckle.

"Only because I have you."

"Let's get you outside," the doctor ordered as he came back
in.

Together, Lois and Dr. Klein helped the still shirtless Clark out
onto the sunny rooftop patio. He immediately felt relief as the
sun touched his skin. They staggered to the table placed near the
middle of the area, and he dropped into a seat, leaning forward
to rest his arms on the table. Lois took the seat next to him,
and Dr. Klein sat across from them.

"Thank you," he said, his voice already feeling stronger. He
took a deep breath, feeling more energized than he had at any
point these last two months.

"You're welcome," Dr. Klein said, inclining his head.

"So how long do you think it will take him to get back to
normal?" Lois asked.

"There wasn't much kryptonite there, so the length of the
exposure plays a bigger role. Given that," Dr. Klein paused,
doing some calculations in the air, "a few months? Less, if he
gets plenty of sun."

Clark breathed a sigh of relief and hung his head. With the
Kryptonite no longer in his system, he would finally be able to
get his powers back. And with the exception of some very
important differences, he could see his life going back to normal
soon.

"Regarding the pregnancy, I can recommend an OB," Dr. Klein's
eyebrows rose in question. At Clark's nod, he smiled. "Dr.
Jackson. He's a friend of mine. Very good. In fact, I'm pretty
sure he knows everything... about everything." Dr. Klein laughed
before turning serious once more. "If it turns out the baby is
Superman's, I'd trust him to help with that."

"I'd see anyone who could get us in before April," Lois said,
rolling her eyes. She crossed her arms and sat back. "They make
a big deal about getting in to see a doctor as soon as you can,
but no one has any open appointments for two months. It's
ridiculous!"

"I'm sure I can pull a few strings. He owes me one." Dr. Klein
winked at them. "You two certainly have a lot to cope with. I'm
sorry it all got so out of hand," Dr. Klein said, a sad smile on
his face. He sighed and added, "and it's a shame you weren't
able to make it to Krypton this time around."

"That was just part of the ruse," Lois answered, shaking her
head. "Lex planted all that information."

"Oh, but there was *real *data," Dr. Klein said. "That chunk
of Krypton is out there."

"What?" they said in unison. Clark felt his jaw drop.

"Several other observatories around the world have shared their
data with us, some just in the last few days," Dr. Klein
explained, his eyebrows high on his forehead. He seemed to
register their surprise suddenly. "Oh, this is big news for you.
Really big. I'm sorry. I should have waited to say something."

This was too much for Clark to take in. He raised one hand up to
run over his face and reached for Lois's clasped hands with the
other. He looked to her and read the plea in her face.

"I'm not going," he stated. "I can't go."

"Of course, you can't," Dr. Klein agreed. "That window closed
a long time ago. The next time we'll be in the right location
for you to use gravity assist won't be for another 10 months or
so. But you don't have to make that decision now," Dr. Klein
assured them.

***

Epilogue

January 25, 1996

Perry still couldn't believe it. Any of it. It was surreal.
Somehow, a feat which he only partly understood, Lex Luthor had
changed history. Not all of it, though. Just enough to put
himself where the egomaniac had determined he should be.

Everyone in Metropolis had *forgotten *that he was a malicious
narcissist that had committed suicide once he was caught.
Everyone had *forgotten *the destruction he wreaked on the Daily
Planet in his efforts to control not only the media, but Lois
Lane herself. Instead, everyone *knew *that he was Metropolis's
most famous philanthropic humanitarian. Everyone *knew *that he
and Lois were married and living their happy lives among the
elite. Everyone *knew *the destruction of the Planet had been
caused by a freak weather accident. And everyone *knew *that the
Luthors had rebuilt it to save something that was so important to
the city.

And no one had reason to suspect that anything was wrong.

It was flawless. Or nearly so, since the man responsible for
carrying out much of that fantastic plan had, on a whim, planted
a key of sorts to undo what had been done. With the cooperation
of radio and television stations nationwide, the keys had been
given to the public and gradually the masses were beginning to
remember the truth of things past.

On the first day following the revelation of Luthor's trickery,
those who had remembered on their own had begun coming forward.
Many of them had brushed it off as some strange dream they'd
had, given that no one else believed it. It was a lot to cope
with. Thankfully, putting things back to the way they had been
previously was not as difficult as Perry had expected.

The facility Jimmy had been investigating that started their
involvement in all of this had been shut down, permanently as far
as anyone knew. It was apparent that nearly all the employees
that worked there were none the wiser, and the ones who had
participated in the unethical experiments had been arrested and
charged. It was also true that once Dr. Hightower was found, his
punishment would be swift and severe.

It was not clear what was in store for his assistant. There were
still questions regarding what would happen to Scott Ferguson,
Lex Luthor's employee tasked with guarding Lois while disguised
as her cameraman after completing his job with Hightower.
Instrumental in both the implementation of the scheme in the
first place as well as its demise, no one yet knew how his
punishment would be dealt with. The lawyer hired to defend him
was confident his change of heart and following actions would see
a reduction in charges and whatever sentence he might have
coming.

Luthor had so cleanly inserted himself into the places he wished
to be by merely replacing the person who rightfully belonged
there with himself. All that was needed was to put that person
back. There were also several instances where it was discovered
that some questionable folks had been placed in positions of
power by Luthor and surprise didn't quite describe how others
reacted to learning the truth about those they worked with.

The last bit of the puzzle, the inconceivable number of record
changes, proved to be difficult though. The young woman, Anna
Seville, tasked with changing them was nowhere to be found. Of
course, if Scott hadn't recalled her name, they wouldn't even
know who to look for. She was good, had encrypted everything
she'd worked with, and S.T.A.R. Labs had a team of engineers
working to unravel it all. Once that was done, everything would
return to normal.

Everything except Lois and Clark.

They couldn't go back to the way things had been. They were
*married *now and *expecting*. Their lives would never be the
same again. But Perry wasn't concerned. He'd watched them grow
and get to know each other, fall in love. If anyone could handle
the strange turn of events, it was them.

They came to Metropolis this morning and gave their statements to
the police. He was there, supporting them. It was difficult to
hear more of what they had endured during all of this. But they
were going to work through it as they always had. They ran an
errand he didn't ask about, and then he joined them for lunch.
It was good to see them together, to catch up.

They sat at the same restaurant where they'd met after the real
destruction of the Planet, the one just across the street with
seating outside. It was a seasonably cold day in Metropolis, but
Clark had insisted on sitting in the sunniest spot they could
find. The waiter looked at him as if he'd lost his mind, but
Perry just eyed him curiously and smiled inwardly as they ordered
and chatted. Now, Clark sat, leaning forward, his back straight
and his face relaxed despite the bruising -- the only visible
evidence that anything was unusual.

"So, you've remembered the wedding," he said, nodding to
Clark, who inclined his head in response. "And you haven't,"
he said, nodding to Lois.

She gave a weak smile as she shook her head. "He's told me
about some of it."

"Not all of it? You mean to tell me he's already keeping
secrets from you?" Perry joked.

"Well, I don't remember it completely... yet," Clark defended
himself.

On their way to the cabin after everything that took place the
morning before, Clark had explained that his memories weren't
locked by just one key, but under layers of them. He was not
surprised by any of that, but his excuse of having a "strong
mind" made Perry chuckle.

"And we would have all remembered it eventually anyway?" Perry
smiled at them.

"Yep," Lois confirmed.

"We've been wondering if Hightower knew that or planned it,"
Clark said. "Seems like there had to be a reason it would be
that way."

"Great shades of Elvis," Perry said, shaking his head. "This
is gonna fill the front page for weeks to come."

Lois took a sip from her drink as Clark took another bite of
food, and Perry took it to mean they weren't ready to talk about
it yet. Changing the subject, he started, "Look, I know things
are a mess, and you two have a lot to work through. Hell, lots of
adjustments are going to be made." He waved his hand in a wide
arch. "But you two can stay at the cabin as long as you need,
and once you're ready to get back to work, your jobs will be
waiting for you."

"Thanks, Chief," Clark said.

"And if you need help finding a place in town, let me know."

"Thanks, Chief," Lois said.

"And if there's anything else you need help with, you can count
on me."

"We know." Clark smiled at Lois, and Perry smiled at the
picture he saw before him.

Years ago, when the cynical, demanding Lois Lane interrupted his
interview of the sensible, down-to-earth Clark Kent, Perry had
seen the look on Clark's face. It took Lois quite a bit longer
to realize it herself, but once she did, Perry wasn't surprised
at all. These two were meant for each other.

"So, when does Superman intend to make his return?" he asked,
raising his eyebrows and pointedly looking between them.

"Uh... We have no idea," Lois answered as Clark tried to keep
his last bite of food in his mouth.

"You sure?" Perry asked, smiling at Clark. "Because I know you
two had the inside scoop on that guy. More than anyone. And since
it turns out Luthor had his grubby hands in that phony trip to
space, too... Well, I'm just not sure what to expect..."

There wasn't much color in Clark's face to begin with, but what
was there disappeared. Perry winked at him and saw Clark's jerk
of surprise when he realized what Perry was getting at.

"The trip wasn't phony. We all saw him leave, Perry," Lois
pointed out. "They said he wouldn't be back for five years or
so."

"Now, Lois," he said, turning to face her, "you and I both
know that *that *part of the story isn't true."

She sat up straighter, her eyes taking on that threatening glare
he'd missed these past two months. Her defenses were up. "I'm
not sure what you're getting at, Chief."

Perry lifted his eyebrows, watching her and waiting for her to
acknowledge what he was insinuating. Clark reached for her hand
and grasped it. They had a silent conversation between them that
Perry imagined would have involved some amount of yelling had it
been out loud.

"I don't know, Perry," Clark finally answered. "He's... not
sure when his powers will return or how he'd explain his
absence."

The surprise he should have felt was already tempered by the
shock of having seen him at the house when they arrived looking
for Lois. He'd known something must have happened to Clark, but
he assumed there would be more searching involved. Then when
he'd noticed the kryptonite shards on the ground as they walked
back to the front of the house, he knew the situation was more
severe.

Perry nodded his approval of the admission. "I've got some
ideas on that front."

"How did you--" Lois began.

"Lois," Perry interrupted, "I did not become editor of a major
newspaper because I can yodel."

***

Clark ran as fast as he could. The dogs barked and growled and
howled ferociously as they chased him. How many were there? Six?
Ten? His legs felt like lead weights as he struggled to move
them. Any second they would be on him, snapping at his heels. The
gate signifying his freedom came into view as he rounded the
corner. His legs became even heavier, the growling closer. He
opened his mouth to scream as he pushed himself with all he had,
but no sound came forth. Something snatched at his hand, pulling
him down. He tried to jerk it away but was suddenly paralyzed.

"Clark?" he heard a soft, familiar voice call to him.

His eyes flew open.

It was a dream.

He was uncomfortably squished into a stiff chair near a window in
a small hospital room, bright afternoon sunlight streaming in on
him. Scott lay asleep in the bed. Lois crouched next to Clark. It
was her hand that gently held his. She looked at him with concern
in her eyes.

Reminding himself of what the day had already held -- relaying
the sad tale to the police, removing the only remaining hold of
Luthor with Dr. Klein, an enlightening lunch with Perry -- calmed
him further and relieved the panic from the dream. He closed his
eyes and stretched as much as he could in the tiny space and
without releasing her hand. "How long was I asleep?" he asked
as he opened his eyes to look at her beautiful face.

"Maybe half an hour?" Lois answered. "What were you dreaming
about?" she asked as she stood up. He kept his hold on her
hand.

"Being chased by some angry dogs." He huffed at the dream. Then
he sat straighter, glancing toward the motionless figure in the
hospital bed. "Any change?"

She looked over at Scott and shook her head. "No, but the doctor
thinks he should wake up within the hour now that he's off the
meds they gave him." He nodded as she turned to him and squeezed
his hand. "How are you?"

He smiled and pulled her to sit on his lap. She giggled as she
sat down, her laughter chasing away the remnants of his dream.
"I love you," he said as he nuzzled her ear.

"I love you, too," she whispered as she turned to press her
lips to his. Ever soft, they left him wanting more, but the sound
of movement from the hospital bed put an end to it.

He reluctantly released his hold on her as she stood but was
pleased when she returned after she realized Scott had only
moved. She sat back down on his lap, keeping her eyes on Scott.
Clark wrapped his arms around her, intertwining their fingers,
and asked the question he hadn't thought to ask until now. "Do
you know why he helped us? I mean, I know he worked for Luthor.
But why did he... switch sides, so to speak?"

Lois sighed and leaned her head back on his shoulder. "His
sister."

Clark frowned. There was so much he didn't know about Scott.
Clark simply trusted him because he seemed to know what was going
on. Scott held out a life-preserver when Clark was flailing, and
Clark latched on to it. He'd been surprised to hear that Scott
was part of it all. Perhaps this was the person to whom he'd
made the promise that he had spoken of back in that hotel room in
Columbia.

"Samantha," Lois continued. "I met her a few times. Very sweet
and young. Innocent. She died about two weeks ago." She looked
toward Clark. "Pancreatic cancer. Just before she died, she
remembered what Hightower had done to her and told Scott."

"He changed her memories, too?"

"More than that." She squeezed his hands and looked away but
didn't expand on that, and Clark didn't push her to. "That was
when Scott realized what kind of monsters he was working for.
Hightower. And Lex."

"He told me about his promise to end it. I was too caught up in
my own misery to think to ask," Clark admitted.

"That treble clef he wears belonged to her. When he first
started singing to me, I thought it was because he missed his
sister. She loved Nat King Cole."

A groan came from the hospital bed, drawing both Lois and Clark
to the bedside. When they reached it, a dreary eyed Scott looked
up at them.

"Hey," he said, his voice scratchy.

"Hey," Lois said. "Thank you," she added, hugging him. When
she sat up from the hug, she smiled at Scott. "You're okay,
aren't you?" she asked despite having been assured multiple
times by multiple people. Clark couldn't blame Lois for not
being sure until she saw for herself.

"I'm okay," Scott confirmed, smiling back at her. "Sore, but
okay. And you guys? You two are okay?"

"Yeah," she said as she reached for Clark's hand.

"And it's all over?" he asked.

"Yeah," Clark answered.

Scott sighed as he leaned his head back on the pillow. "What
happened? The last thing I remember, we were still in the house
at the bottom of the bluff trying to figure a way out."

"Lex knocked you out with something in a syringe when he came
back with his... weapon," Lois explained. "It broke as they
fought over it, and then it exploded."

"Lois got out before then," Clark amended. "We were trying to
get you out of the window when we all got blasted out."

"*We*?"

"Lex and I," Clark admitted. "I don't know why he helped, but
I'm glad he did."

"He died," Lois added, a hint of grief tinging her voice. If he
hadn't understood everything that had happened over the past two
months, Clark would have been angry, but even he still felt the
guilt planted by that madman.

"What about the rest of them?"

"The police have everyone but Hightower and Montgomery," Lois
answered. "Apparently, I was the last person to see them two
days ago."

"And Seville?"

"No one even knows where to look for her," Clark said.

"She'll probably be hard to find. I never even saw her." Scott
took a slow deep breath. Clark saw the lines of strain and could
hear the guilt in his sigh. It was all too familiar.

"Scott," Clark began, "none of us would be here right now if
it weren't for you. You vowed to stop that monster, and you did.
Lex is gone. Hightower won't be able to show his face anywhere
without getting arrested. The weapon Montgomery made is
destroyed, and everyone's getting back to normal."

"He's right," Lois said, nodding. "Perry tells us the lawyer
he found thinks things won't be too bad for you."

"It's fine," he said solemnly. "I'm ready to accept the
consequences. I'm just glad I was able to help end all of it."

"And you were right," Clark said, nodding to Lois. "She knew
exactly what to do."

Lois looked at him then. "What did I know?"

"How to get his powers back." Scott smiled at her then. "I
didn't even know how they'd been turned off."

"Well, they aren't back yet," Clark corrected. "But they will
be."

***

February 1, 1996

"How long do we have to wait here?" Lois asked, exasperated.
She leaned back on the sterile pillow and threw her arm over her
head.

"Just a few more minutes," Clark assured her. She felt his
fingers slide into her open hand and interlace themselves with
hers.

"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked. "Are you feeling any
more *normal *yet?"

"I'm fine," he said, squeezing her hand. "Don't worry about
me." Opening her eyes, she met his as he sat in the doctor's
chair beside the examination table. "What exactly is supposed to
happen here, anyway?" he asked, looking around at all the
equipment filling the room.

She smiled at his attempt to distract her as she sat up.
"Well," she started, fiddling with his fingers in her hand,
"they'll ask me a bunch of questions that I won't know the
answer to. We'll feel incredibly awkward about it. Then they'll
see what they can tell with the ultrasound."

"What questions are we not going to know the answers to?" he
asked with a hint of mischief.

"The date of my last period." She held up her hand and
shrugged. "Whether anything unusual has happened the last few
weeks." She rolled her eyes. "Who the father is..."

"Me," he said, squeezing her hand. "I'm the father." He
kissed her fingers then and smiled up at her. That genuine smile
always made everything fine even in the worst circumstances.
Despite everything that had happened, he was so obviously happy
they were married and starting a family, and she drank it in. She
needed it. "What are they going to be able to tell us with the
ultrasound?" he prompted.

She was certain he knew the answer to this question. Even though
he didn't have his superpowers, he still retained all the
information he'd learned... ever. But she answered his questions
anyway. "Well, we should be able to hear the baby's
heartbeat--"

"*Our *baby's heartbeat," he corrected.

She smiled as she continued, "They should be able to tell us how
far along I am--"

"How far along *we *are," he corrected again.

Her smile grew. "A due date."

His eyes twinkled.

"This is all so weird. I don't even feel pregnant," she said,
shaking her head. "Shouldn't I be having cravings or be sick
or... something?"

"You have been sick," Clark reminded her.

"Yeah, but only when I'm thinking about... everything that
happened."

Clark squeezed her hand as he smiled sympathetically at her.

"I haven't gained any weight, either. Shouldn't there be a
bump or something? Oh, God! What if something is wrong with the
baby?" she thought out loud, bringing her free hand up to cover
her mouth.

"Lois, you're jumping to conclusions." He scooted the chair
closer to her and pulled her hand from her mouth. "You can ask
the doctor all these things when he comes in."

A knock at the door stopped their conversation and was followed
by the entry of the doctor. "Hi, folks!" the entirely too
chipper man said as he came in. "I'm Dr. Jackson."

Lois flinched at his entrance, but Clark didn't move.

"Clark," he introduced himself, a half smile on his mouth.

"Lois," she said, smiling back at Clark. The doctor cleared his
throat, bringing Lois's attention to him. Clark stood from his
seated position and moved to stand beside Lois, across from where
the doctor now sat on his chair.

"Nice to meet you both," he started. "Dr. Klein tells me I
have to take *extra special care *of you two."

"You came very highly recommended," Clark acknowledged with a
nod, though Dr. Jackson couldn't know just how highly
recommended he was if Dr. Klein would trust him with Superman's
baby.

"And I've heard quite a bit about you two in the last week. Is
it all true?"

Lois was saved from her snarky response by Clark, who merely
responded, "As long as you didn't read it in a tabloid. Could
we just get on with the appointment, please?"

"Certainly." Dr. Jackson had the decency to look chagrined as
he flipped through the pages on his clipboard. "Before we get
started I have just a few questions that the nurse didn't get
from you." He paused and flipped back to the first page. "What
was the date of your last period?"

"Given that you've heard so much about us already," Clark
nearly snapped, "you probably know there's a lot we don't
know."

Lois bit her lip to keep from smiling. "The last period I
remember was November 2nd," she supplied. "I don't know if
there was one since then." She appreciated his protectiveness,
but she leveled Clark with a look that she hoped told him to calm
down.

"Right," the doctor said, making a note. "And we already know
plenty of unusual things have happened recently, so we'll keep
an eye out for any ill effects." He looked up and smiled at
Clark, lifting his eyebrows. "And you're the father?"

"Yes," Clark answered confidently, but the look he was giving
the doctor surely would have vaporized him had he had his powers
back already.

"Actually..." Lois started, knowing it had to be said, "we...
can't be sure. We're hoping you can shed some light on that."
*This is embarrassing*, she thought as she leaned back on the
table. She was a perfectly responsible adult, in charge of her
own life, making reasonable choices, living within her means.
Well... at least up until two months ago.

She had accepted that she was pregnant for the most part, even if
it wasn't under the circumstances she would have liked. First,
it would have been nice to remember her wedding. Second, she had
imagined she and her husband would think about it and plan for
it. Third, and the most frustrating difference, she assumed there
would be no question about the identity of the father. Not
knowing who the father of your child is was a problem for someone
else. Not her.

"Interesting," Dr. Jackson said, thankfully with no judgement
in his voice. "So, you might have been pregnant before you were
abducted two months ago?"

"It's possible," she answered.

"Well, let's get started then," Dr. Jackson said as Clark took
a seat on a stool at Lois's side, "and see what we can find
out."

The doctor had Lois expose her abdomen while she reclined on the
table as he positioned the machine beside him, turning the screen
to where Lois and Clark would be able to see it. He gave a quick
rundown of what he was going to do, squirted cold gel on her
smooth and still flat belly, and touched the transducer to her
abdomen.

Lois couldn't tell anything from the picture. It looked like
static on a TV when it's tuned to a channel that doesn't exist.
Lightly pressing at first, he moved the transducer around until
he found what he was looking for.

"Okay, here we go," he said flipping one of the many switches
on the machine parked beside him. A faint thump could be heard
over the speaker. As he pressed harder, the beat became louder.
Strong and quick.

"I really am pregnant," she said under her breath, a heavy
weight settling on her.

When she looked at Clark and saw his dopey grin, she felt some of
the weight disappear and laughed. His happiness over the
situation did much to calm her nerves. The longer he kept acting
this way, the more she believed it.

"152 beats per minute," the doctor said. "Sounds fantastic.
Let's see how big the little guy or gal is." The doctor began
pressing even harder and clicking buttons while Lois watched.

Clark leaned closer and whispered in her ear, "Can you tell what
we're looking at?"

"No," she whispered back. "Can you?"

"Well, I thought I saw a head and some arms there for a
minute." His dopey grin had returned.

Lois quickly turned her head to him. Head and arms? Should it
have a head and arms yet? This was happening just a bit too fast
for her.

"Alright. This right here," Dr. Jackson said as he pointed to a
fuzzy blob on the screen, "is your baby. Here--" he moved the
image on the screen, then pointed to a smaller, wiggling blob,
"--is your baby's heart."

They sat in silence for a few moments. Lois and Clark looked at
the screen while the doctor jotted something down on the
clipboard resting on the counter behind him. Watching the small,
wiggling blob keep a steady pace made everything even more real.

This was happening.

"Looks like you are measuring about twelve weeks," the doctor
interrupted her thoughts, "which goes well enough with the date
you gave of your last known period..." His voice trailed off as
he looked back at his clipboard, and Lois turned her attention to
Clark who sat beaming at her. "That puts your due date somewhere
in the first week of August. It's too early to tell the gender,
but we can definitely look at that at your next appointment if
you're interested." He looked up then, his face serious.
"Unfortunately, since we can't know the date of conception from
this, and you were abducted near the time conception would have
been most likely, this isn't enough information to say either
way. We'd have to run a paternity test, which can be--"

"No!" Clark said quickly and firmly, a weary look in his eyes.
She understood his reluctance perfectly. Perhaps this would be
something Dr. Klein would have to handle for them.

"No," she repeated more calmly. "It doesn't matter. As long
as the baby is healthy."

"And it is." The doctor stood and smiled at them. "Are there
any questions I can answer for you?"

"Lois was wondering why she hasn't had any symptoms of
pregnancy," Clark asked after Lois didn't offer the question
herself. "Is that normal?"

"Every woman experiences pregnancy differently," the doctor
offered. "The level of severity of symptoms and when they appear
depends on a great many factors. I wouldn't be concerned at this
point since the ultrasound shows a healthy fetus. We'll
certainly keep an eye on things though."

"Thank you," Clark said shaking the doctor's hand.

"No problem. I'll give you two a few minutes in here and see
you in a few weeks."

Lois only nodded as she felt tears begin gathering in her eyes.
As the doctor left, she cleaned off her abdomen and felt the
first tears begin to fall. She swiped uselessly at them with her
free hand, but she wasn't able to stop them from coming. She
couldn't even say why exactly she was crying.

Clark chuckled and handed her a Kleenex from somewhere. Then he
pulled her into a loving embrace, lifting her feet from the floor
as he spun her around. He slowed as he kissed her before planting
her feet back on the ground. "So," he said, his smile wide,
"it looks like we are having a baby in August."

His happiness was contagious, and she smiled through her tears.
"We are," she agreed.

"See, I told you it would all work out."

"How can you say that?" she asked, frowning. "There is still
so much we don't know."

"Lois," he said, "All I need to know is that I love you.
Whatever happens, happens. And it will be unforgettable."

THE END