The Perfect Costume

By Olympe (aka Lara Joelle Kent) <melympe@yahoo.com>

Rated: PG

Submitted: July 2009

Summary: Lois needs a date for a costume party. A date that would
be able to survive the matchmaking attempts of Ellen Lane.
Someone with a skin of steel. Only he couldn't go there as
himself, right? But Lois has the perfect costume for him.

Disclaimer: All standard disclaimers apply. I do not own any of
the characters used in the story. I write for fun, not for
profit. :-)

***

There was the knock on her window that Lois had come to associate
with one of Superman's visits. She greeted him with a happy
smile. "Hi! You know that my window is always open for you."

Superman smiled right back at her. "Yes, I know. Still, I think
it's only appropriate to knock before entering." Taking a long
look at her, he realized that Lois seemed upset. "Lois, is
anything bothering you?"

Lois sighed. Superman knew her only too well. As did Clark. But
she couldn't tell Clark about it. He wasn't safe. Superman was.
"Yes, there's something." She paused until she saw the Man of
Steel nod in encouragement. "It's really stupid, actually. But
there is this costume party at my mother's place, and she
insists I go there."

Clark had a hard time hiding his smile. "How badly can a costume
party be worrying you? It's not as though you were dangling over
the jaws of death," he teased.

Did she hear right? *Superman* was teasing her? "You have no
idea. You don't know my mother. It will be awful. She wants me
to bring a date. And, knowing my mother, she'll start
matchmaking as soon as I get there. And I still don't know who
to ask to go with me." Sadly, she shook her head. Why couldn't
she have a mother like Clark's?

"You could ask Clark," Superman suggested.

"Oh no, no, no, I can't. See, he means a lot to me, much more
than I'm ready to tell him, and I don't want to scare him away.
And that's exactly what my mother would do. No sane man would
even consider dating me if he knew what kind of family I'm stuck
with. Much less a man with parents who are as perfect as
Clark's," Lois babbled.

He listened intently to Lois' trademark babble, secretly
enjoying every second of it. How much he loved listening to his
babbling brook, she'd never know. In fact, he'd have to be very
careful to never call her a babbling brook. If she ever found
out, she'd kick him where it hurt. And she'd find a way to make
it hurt. "And you can't ask anybody else because Clark could
get jealous?" he suggested.

Lois sighed heavily. "That's not the point here. Clark and I
aren't exclusive, so he has no reason to get jealous. No, the
point is that I barely know any people. Most people I know are
from the Planet, and I wouldn't want to ask any of them. It'd
be all over the office within an hour. I don't have time to cope
with any rumor-mongering sleazeball of a colleague."

"Don't you know anybody else you could ask?" Superman asked
before he could stop himself.

Lois looked up at him speculatively. "Well, now that you mention
it... I know *you*. Any plans for tomorrow evening?" she
finished on a brighter note.

Inwardly, Clark groaned. He had known that he shouldn't have
asked his question as soon as it left his mouth. Now, he had a
problem. He couldn't let Lois down, yet he could hardly appear
as her date at her mother's party.

"It's not as if you had to go there as Superman. As a matter of
fact, I'd rather you got yourself another costume." Lois
stopped to think. Something was wrong with that. She couldn't
picture Superman entering a store and buying a costume. With some
trouble, she suppressed the giggles threatening to escape from
her mouth. "Or I'm going get you a costume. I think that's a
much better idea. Thank you for helping me out."

Lois flashed a bright smile at him as he cocked his head to
listen to a call for help. His help. "Lois, I'm sorry, I have
to go. We'll talk about it later."

Superman flew out of the window. And he began to wonder. Why had
he ever agreed to be Lois' date? Oh, right. He hadn't.

***

The next afternoon, Superman knocked at Lois' window again.
"Hi, there," she greeted him. "You're early. That's good.
Because you still have to get into your costume. Just a question:
Does the Suit come off? It doesn't matter much, because you can
hide most of it under the costume I got you. Only your boots
don't fit in with it. Maybe you can get a pair of black
shoes?"

Clark took quick inventory of the things he had with him. "I
have some with me. Why?"

Lois shot him a look which clearly stated that she thought him
rather dumb. She tossed him a black something he quickly
identified as some sort of robe. "Because this would look really
stupid with red boots sticking out from underneath it. But with
black shoes, you might just fade into the background. Maybe you
want to change in my bedroom? I've got one of Clark's suits
laid out for you, should you not want to wear yours underneath. I
think you're about the same height."

Clark hesitated for a moment. This was going to be dangerous.
Then again, the robe would surely cover the suit, no matter which
one he wore. So Clark opted for getting into his regular suit.
When he was done, he walked back into the living room.

Lois eyed him critically. "Yes, you look okay, I guess." She
felt a slight flush creep over her cheeks. Superman looked
absolutely *fantastic* in black. Droolworthy, even. Pity there
was no way she could ogle his arms, though. She shook herself out
of her reverie and grabbed her lipstick. Without any warning, she
approached Superman with it.

"Wait a second," he protested. "What is the lipstick for?"

Lois rolled her eyes. Superman was supposed to know everything.
So why did he have to ask? "Superman, you need a scar. And I'm
going to give you one."

Superman shook his head vehemently. "Lois, I'm not going as a
zombie!"

"Of course not. You're going as a wizard. A very powerful
wizard." Sudden inspiration stuck her. "Really, that's just
the costume for you. You could even pretend to be riding a
broomstick."

"Wizards don't ride broomsticks. Witches do."

"Nonsense. This wizard does. He's even on the House Quidditch
team."

Quidditch? Lois was talking about Quidditch? That could only mean
big trouble for the Man of Steel. Lois wouldn't want him to be
the Boy who Lived, would she? Knowing Lois, the answer was
probably yes. "I don't think this is a good idea," he
protested weakly.

"Of course it is! It's perfect." Quickly, Lois painted a
lightning shape onto Superman's forehead. At least it was almost
lightning-shaped. "All you still have to do is muss up your hair
and put on these glasses. Meanwhile, I'm going to change into
Hermione Granger." She held her hand out to him. She held
sellotaped glassed in it. Cautiously, he took them into his hand.
Before he could voice any more protests, Lois vanished into her
bedroom. Behind her, the door closed with the force of a passing
whirlwind.

Had she been looking at him, Lois would have seen a very
flustered superhero. He couldn't do it. Lois would recognize him
at once; there was no way around it. She'd go ballistic. But
didn't he want to tell her eventually? So, why not take this
opportunity?

He flew home in a rush to get all the gel out of his hair; then
he returned to Lois' place, all in an instant. That obstacle out
of the way, Superman stood in front of a mirror, glasses in hand.
He took a deep breath before putting them on. He looked at his
mirror image, and Clark Kent in a Harry Potter costume was
looking back. This costume was indeed perfect.

Suddenly, Lois opened the door to her bedroom again. "So, what
do I get to call you tonight? Superman does seem rather stupid,"
she said, addressing his back.

Slowly, Clark squared his shoulders and turned around to face
her. "You're right. Superman doesn't seem right."

THE END