The Sweet Scent of Superman

By Paul-Gabriel Wiener <>

Rated: G

Submitted: January 2002

Summary: A strange, perfume-filled dream leads Lois to a revelation.


Lois Lane was dreaming. She was walking through the mall, and had come to the perfume counter. She browsed through the available fragrances. For some reason, the colognes and perfumes had been placed together in one display.

Hmmm… What to get? Tommy Girl? No, she was too mature. Chanel Number 5? Off in the distance, she heard an echo— "Number 5 is alive!" What was that about? Whatever. She didn't feel like a number. Pleasures? Mmmm… that reminded her of Superman. Obsession? No, she wasn't obsessed with him. Not really. She just wanted him. Egoeiste? She wasn't being egotistical! Superman had told her she was special to him, hadn't he?

She moved on, thoughts of Clark Kent drifting into her mind. Contradiction? Yeah, that seemed about right for Clark Kent. But she wasn't looking for Clark Kent, was she? Eternity? Good old dependable Clark. Could Superman really be there for her forever, or would a relationship with him be more… flighty? That seemed an oddly appropriate word. Green Jeans?? They made something called Green Jeans? VERSACE made something called Green Jeans? That did bring up a point, though. Was Clark too much of a plain country boy? He seemed to have shown far more sophistication than she'd first expected. Good Life? Clark could provide that. Passion? Now, that seemed more like Superman—exciting. Not like Clark, right? Guess? Yeah. This WAS rather confusing.

She looked at the next bottle. Superman by CK. What? Oh yes—that new Superman cologne they'd made. At least it was better than Michael Jordan. She'd never smelled it, but the scent she most associated with Michael Jordan was sweat. She looked back at the bottle. It kept changing, the Superman logo battling with the CK. Somehow, the two seemed to have trouble staying on the same bottle. No, that wasn't quite it. What was it about Superman and CK? It was too confusing. She looked away, and saw the next bottle. For some reason, it had glasses on. CK One. Huh. Superman. CK. One. She reached over to pick up the bottle, but when she tried to touch it, it moved, merging with the Superman bottle. What did that mean? She held the bottle, constantly shifting and struggling, the glasses appearing and disappearing, the logos battling for dominance. Superman. CK. Superman. CK. One. Her mind whirled, and she jolted awake. "Superman. CK. One. Oh my God!"