By Paul-Gabriel Wiener <pgwfolc@netscape.net>
Rated: G
Submitted: January 2002
Summary: Clark's revelation to Lois leads to Lois' revelation to Clark which leads to…
***
"Lois," Clark said tentatively, "we need to talk."
"Well, sure we need to talk, Clark! I've been trying to talk to you for weeks now, but you keep running off on me!" Lois realized, belatedly, that this wasn't the best way to encourage her partner (and maybe more) to talk to her. Still, she was frustrated, and with good reason, too.
"That's what I wanted to talk to you about, Lois."
"What?"
"The reason I keep running off. It's… I'm…"
"You're afraid of me, of US, aren't you?"
"What? No! It's not that! It's not that at all! God, Lois! Nothing could be further from the truth."
"Then, what is it?"
Clark took a deep breath. Of all the things he'd faced in his life — from moving out of Kansas to swallowing high explosives- this was the hardest. "I'm Superman."
"What?"
"I'm Superman. I've been running away from our conversations to go fly around and save people's lives."
Lois had been prepared for just about anything — or so she thought. A fear of intimacy, panic attacks, a secret marriage — all sorts of possibilities had gone through her head, but this… it was worse than she thought. It was clear that he meant what he was saying. She couldn't remember him ever sounding so serious. Still, she had thought she'd known him better than that. To have worked with him so long and not realized… "Clark, I don't know what to say. I'm not good at these things…"
"What? You're supposed to have experience with people telling you they're secretly superheroes?"
"No, I mean with approaching people with mental problems."
"Mental problems?"
"Clark, you're delusional."
"You… think I'm…" Clark tried to absorb Lois' attitude. He supposed he should have expected it, but, well, he hadn't. So, he was going to have to prove to Lois that he knew what he was talking about.
"You see? I told you I wasn't good at these things. Look how badly I'm handling this. I guess confronting you directly with your delusion wasn't the right way, but you know me — just cut right to the chase. No beating around the bush with me. No, I just have to—"
"Lois?" Clark interjected Lois' babble before she could get too wound up in avoiding the issue at hand.
"What?"
"Look at my feet."
"Look at your feet? Look at your feet. Okay… Well, if the direct approach isn't working, I guess I can try playing along. I'll look at your feet. Right. There are your feet. A perfectly normal pair of feet in a perfectly normal pair of shoes hovering three inches off the ground. Wait… uhm, Clark? Why aren't your feet touching the ground?"
"Because I'm floating, Lois. I told you — I'm Superman. I can do these things. Now do you believe me?"
"You're… Superman? Oh, my god. You're Superman."
Clark sped over to Lois, gently catching her, and easing her onto the couch. "Now, I realize this is a lot to take in, and you're probably kind of upset with me now…"
"Upset? Why would I be upset?"
Uh-oh. It was worse than he'd thought. Hysterical sarcasm. "Okay, Lois… just let it out…"
"Clark! This is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me!"
"It… is?"
"My best friend and my fantasy lover — heck, EVERY woman's fantasy lover — are the same guy?!"
"Fantasy lover?"
"And you're not afraid of our relationship?"
"Afraid? No — I told you—"
"And I'm not going crazy being in love with two different men at the same time?!"
"In… love… ?"
"Clark! This is THE BEST! I'm so happy! Clark? Clark, are you okay?"
"I… think I've got to sit down…"
THE END