By Dominique from France <do.bremaud@voila.fr>
Rated PG
Submitted January 2000
Summary: It's the last straw for Clark when Lois again professes that she'd love Superman "even if he was an ordinary guy" … but have his resulting actions caused an irreparable rift between the duo?
"This is my first attempt at fanfic." I've already read that a few times and really, this is right for me as well. I didn't know I would write a story one day, but actually, I did! I guess the couple we are all so fond of is a very fine subject for a story…
I must say I've never watched the two first seasons because I only started getting interested with the show the last time the French TV broadcasted the series and the two first seasons were already over. Too bad for me. Just have to wait for the next time. Luckily, I have been reading so many fanfics that it helped me to imagine what it was in the beginning between Lois and Clark.
I also must say I am French, and writing in a foreign language is a really tough job as my English is quite basic. Luckily, I had all the necessary help provided by my editor Karen Ward without whom this story would be quite imperfect. I want to thank her for all the time she gently offered me. Anyway, I won't hear if you start laughing about the mistakes I made, so do not hesitate. Please yourself!
The story is based on the idea that Clark might have been thinking differently about the fact that Lois has to prove her love to him before he tells her about his dual identity, and mainly because of his patience fading away…
I hope you will enjoy reading this story. If you do, then your pleasure is mine.
All characters belong to their owners. No intent to infrige of any copyright.
Any comments welcome at do.bremaud@voila.fr
***
Lois Lane stormed out of the elevator and headed directly for her desk, not even giving a gaze at the reporter that was already at work just under her eyes in the newsroom of the Daily Planet. She was in no mood for a morning talk with even her best friend for the moment. In fact, she had a lot to do. She had spent half the night trying to find the clue of the story she was on. And she knew that it was the kind of story that could drive you to the Pulitzer — that damned Pulitzer Prize she had been running after for such a long time.
Lois Lane was one of the famous top reporters of the biggest newspaper in the world, the Daily Planet. She had worked hard to achieve her career as a now well-recognized young woman reporter with a name that meant a job very well done. She had a true talent to find big stories that would enhance the Daily Planet's popularity, and her editor-in-chief, Perry White, knew her value. She just could not disappoint him. By now, she was within an ace of revealing the biggest scandal of the year. She had to concentrate on her job: no time to babble whith her colleague this morning. She switched on her computer and began searching on the Net for the last response she needed to find out to explode the world of the politics in Metropolis…
Of course, Clark had seen her enter the newsroom and he couldn't help getting disappointed by her not even saying hello to him. What was wrong with her today? Clark Kent had grown up to a senior reporter at the Daily Planet and was now known as the second partner of the famous team Lane and Kent. He had first been introduced to Lois two years ago, and he had to admit himself they had been the very best two years of his life. Yet, his relationship with his partner had not always been easy in the beginning — mainly because of a Lois unwilling to share her bylines with a new reporter to whom she knew she would have to teach everything about the writing of a good story. But, she was such a very beautiful woman and she was so brilliant that Clark promptly fell in love with the woman he knew he had been waiting for for such a long time and had been desperate to find one day…
The team was now at the top of its glory. Lois and Clark had found out and written so many thrilling stories that Lois had eventually started getting more relaxed with her partner. They were now the best friends that could be met. Still, Lois had never gave Clark any chance for their relationship to become just more than a friendship one…
"Hi, Lois. How are you today?"
"Oh, hi, Clark. I'm fine, thanks," Lois answered still typing on her keyboard.
One of her numerous sources had let her know that a few people had been driven to the hospital in order to cure digestive troubles from unknown origins. Lois had gone directly to the hospital to ask physicians a few questions. In fact, they did not know exactly where the problem was coming from. All she had been able to find out was that all the patients were coming from the same borough in north Metropolis. For a few days, she had not been able to find any further clue, but eventually she had a flash: what better common denominator than water quality to follow up her research?
It did not take her long to discover the name of the laboratory that was in charge of the periodical analyses that were regularly operated on the water. A phone call had soon made her skeptical about the integrity of the lab so she had secretly ordered a counter-evaluation at another lab, and the result had been clear. The water, though not improper for normal people, was still inappropriate for people suffering >from certain stomach diseases. That was a story!
She could have dropped her bombshell at once, but she was Lois Lane and her intuition told her that there were more hidden secrets in her story. Was the lab just incompetent or was it covering something else? What about the company that was in charge of the delivery of the supposedly pure water to the inhabitants of North Metropolis? All of these were questions she had to answer before writing anything about it.
"Here it is. I found out what was missing! I have to go now, Clark." Lois continued, still concentrated on her job, "I'll talk to you after the visit I have to pay right now to a certain local leader. I can't say more to you for the moment about what I've discovered. I'm not even sure I'm not totally going the wrong way."
"Lois, maybe I can help," Clark started. "I do know that look in your eyes and I wouldn't like to think you're being endangered. Please let me go with you."
"Clark, sometimes you do behave like the very farmboy of the Kansas you definitely come from. You can be so father-like! Just take it easy. Really, this is just a courtesy visit and I won't be long, anyway. Bye. See you for lunch."
"Okay, Lois. Let's have lunch together and you will tell to me all you've been through…"
***
"Help! Superman, help!"
Once again, Lois Lane was desperately needing her superhero to rescue her. The courtesy visit she was supposed to attend had turned out to be totally unfriendly: a guy was now facing her, aiming a gun at her.
One thing she was sure of was she had been right to suspect the mayor of North Metropolis to be involved in this despicable affair of infrigement of public attribution for the licence of the water market. Maybe, she had been too right, and once more in her tormented professionnal life, she was directly facing danger. *Why didn't I listen to Clark and accept the help he offered me this morning? Really, Lane, you're so stubborn sometimes! I hope Superman won't be long — this man doesn't really seem to be kidding.
As if Superman had been reading her mind, he suddenly burst in through the window, stopped just in front of the man, and promptly unarmed him.
"Wow! Just in time, as usual," thanked Lois.
"Yeah, but this time I do have to talk to you. Please wait for me — just the time for me to deliver that guy to the police and I will come right back here. Really, I do need a private talk with you."
What was the matter with the man she was having such a crush on? thought Lois when 'her fantasy', as she called Superman, flew out of the room and came back just a few seconds later.
"Lois, you can't go on risking your life all the time just like you did once again today! What are you thinking when you are literally rushing alone into danger? Does it mean this is the only way you have to call for me so that I will pay attention to you?"
"Really, Superman, I can't believe what I'm hearing! Even if you saved my life once again today, you have absolutely no right to judge me the way you do right now. This is so disappointing coming from you. And, Mister Superman, let me tell you one thing: I certainly do not request your abilities as a Superhero to make you pay attention to the very lovely and normal girl I can be! What I think is…"
"What I think is you definitely have a crush for me, mainly because of the fascination you can't resist or deny for all the powers I have. That's what I think."
"My God, but just can't you understand I would love you anyway if you were only a normal guy?"
"I doubt that."
"How dare you not trust me when I tell you I would open my heart to you all the same, even if you had no powers at all?"
"Lois, did it never occurred to you that you have already met me as a normal guy. I mean without the blue suit, and that not only didn't you even recognize me till now, but you also seemed not to be interested at all to have a true love with me?"
"Nonsense. How could it be? I would have recognized you at the first gaze!"
"You certainly did not."
"Really?"
"Yeah, Superman is no one else but Clark and you hardly noticed him this morning…"
Clark could not stand any longer listening to the woman he was in love with and flew away, leaving Lois totally disconcerted…
***
Lunch was over now at the Daily Planet. Every employee had gone back to work. Lois and Clark were both busy at their desks, each one typing on the keyboard of their computer or confirming sources on the phone. They did not look at each other at all. On the contrary, they were doing their best to avoid staring at each other. They had not exchanged one word since they had returned from their impromptu rendez-vous with the huge secret they both knew they would have to deal with by now.
Clark was in such a despair that he had thought a minute of leaving the office right away, just not to be confronted with that damned woman he just couldn't help loving. He had just revealed her his dual identity without even thinking of the inevitable consequences it definitely would have on both their lives. His words had just come out of his mouth naturally just because of Lois doing her best once again to make him lose his nerve. Now, it was oll over.
Lois would never forgive him for hiding his huge secret from her, he was sure of that. How could she? He had already made her understand that he was in love with her, yet she would certainly only notice that he had not trusted her enough to share all his secrets with her. *This woman has a real talent to upset me.* Clark was thinking. *She hardly talked to me this morning when she arrived at the office and once again she avoided me, prefering dealing all alone with the story she was on. And, she pretends that she would love Superman as a normal guy all the same. Ridiculous!* Clark frowned. *I just can't believe she is so superficial and only interested with the surface a man can show her. I had thought more of her. There must be — I hope there must be something else I just can't size about her behaviour…* Yes, something else, but what?
Of course, Clark knew Lois had had adventures with men that had turned out each time to be a disaster so that she had closed her heart not to be hurt again. He knew that, but he had thought Lois would have guessed that he, Clark, could be such a different man from the ones she had been disappointed with. Surely, she must have seen that he would do anything for her, that he would be as gentle and loving as humanly possible. Humanly? The word echoed in his head for a second or two. Was it the reason why she was so attracted to Superman? Because knowing that he wasn't born on the earth made him almost unattainable? Unlike Clark, she knew that a love affair with Superman would lead her nowhere and was totally aware of that from the very beginning, she knew she would not be hurt once again? That must be the answer he was searching for.
Yes, that must be the clue for Lois being so attracted to his alter ego. If he wanted her to feel more secured with being in love with him, surely he must make her realize that falling in love with him would only lead her to a real and safe happiness. Clark was so in love with his Lois that he thought it must not be very difficult for him to make her see how sincerely he felt about her, and that he would never do her any harm. *Lois let me show you the joy you could give me if only you would start trusting me…*
Clark rose his head and looked in the direction of Lois' desk only to find out that she had left the office without even telling him what she was up to. *Of course, why should she have told me anything now that I'm nothing else but just an alien mistrusting her?*
He got back to work.
***
The silver Cherokee was blocked in the traffic jam. Usually, Lois Lane would have grumbled about that, but she was in fact totally absentminded of the situation she was stuck in.
*Clark is Superman!* She just could not believe what her partner (*what partner?*) had told her today. *Clark is Superman!* she repeated to herself for the umpteenth time. The words themselves seemed senseless. Clark is Superman and she never had the faintest idea of it all! She was certainly going to get mad about the idea that was still so difficult in entering her mind…
Lois was not certain of what she was most upset with: Clark not telling her anything, or her being so stupid not to have guessed that the man who was sharing his day job with her had such a fanstatic double life. Clark was Superman? The idea finally started making its way through her mind. Lois had always known that the two men of her life had a certain likeness: they shared the same brown eyes she knew she could easily drown in. *Yes, I can easily drown my soul in Clark's eyes.* she had to admit to herself.
In fact, Lois had recently came to the idea that Clark was no longer only her partner and best friend. He had became so more than just a loyal friend she knew she could count on. But she was still so scared to engage herself in a much more complicated and unsecure relationship with Clark that she had delayed the day when it would not be possible any longer for her to hide it. She was in love with Clark and she had never let him know! But still, if he was as in love with her as he had told her he was, why had he not revealed his dual identity to her? He should have known she was worth trusting. She would never be able to forgive him for such a betrayal.
*Yes, I will never forgive you, Clark Kent!* Lois was claiming in her car to herself. *Anyway, who would I be able to talk about all that stuff with? Lane, please, no self pity. You are THE top reporter at the Daily Planet. Never let a man enter in your life in such an undecent manner.* But still, why was she so utterly miserable about the course her life had suddenly taken? Waste, this was the word she was looking for and it had finally come to her mind. It was all such a waste. And of course, everything was his own fault: he should have trusted her. *How dare he be so unloyal to me?*
Still driving her Cherokee, Lois could not help letting the image of Clark grinning at her pass through her mind. Of course, now everything was clear. And she had thought he had been too shy to start talking of private things with her when he was leaving with the worst excuses he could imagine! He was just running away to play the Superhero he was. It could have been such fun if only he had taken her with him. Now, she understood how he was so easily getting exclusives from Superman. Was he recording himself? No, such an attitude could not be forgiven.
Yet, Lois was beginning to feel uneasy about the declarations of guilt she had, just a few moments ago, thrown at him. It was not like Clark to be so tricky. He surely must have had a good reason to have hidden this tremendous secret from her. Well, Superman had appeared at the same time Clark had entered her life, (how could she have never noticed that before?) and truly, at that period, he could not have shared his secret with her. *Well, I didn't treat him very well in the beginning of our relationship; I just considered him no one else but a farmboy coming from Nowhereville. Oh, he must have hated me when I was so stuck about anything Superman could do, and at the same time, literally ignoring my partner. *What have I done?* What could she do to repair the pain she had caused her friend?
Eat some chocolate ice cream, that what she was about to do now. That was her therapy when everything in her own world was getting troubled. And it definitely was the case. Luckily, she had finally reached the street of her appartment and she had left the office very early this afternoon, (she just could not stand being so close to Clark the Liar…) so she would have plenty of time to absorb any quantity of ice cream she felt like…
Within a few minutes, she was comfortably seated on her couch, a big box of her favorite chocolate ice cream on the table just in front of her, so that she was absentmindedly taking large spoonfuls of her favorite dessert. She was in fact totally lost in her thoughts about that damned news, she just could not blow it out of her mind. *Lois, you must be daydreaming? No it must be a nightmare and I am going to wake up and everything will be back in its own place in my life.* But she knew the truth was definitely settled in her mind: her best friend and partner was no one else but Superman, the Superhero the whole world was admiring.
Lois felt a thrill of fear running through her skin. *What if Clark didn't want to see me ever again? He must be so upset with me…* She had told him that she would have recognized Superman at the first gaze if she had met him as a normal guy, and she had worked day after day with him at her side, without even contemplating the idea that Clark was 'her fantasy'! And when she eventually fell in love with Clark, she never did anything to make him understand her new feelings for him. *Clark will never believe me now if I tell him how much I love him.* Lois sighed to herself. *And really, Lane, you can't blame Clark for that. You sure gave him no choice but to think you were only interested in Superman.*
And what was her new life going to be like without Clark being so close as she was so used to? Lois just coud not stand the idea of getting back to the loneliness she had before her companion had entered her life two years ago. *Lois Lane, you certainly deserved what is happening to you today, but you're not going to remain here, bored to death, without even fighting to get back your ex-future lover…* She knew what she had to do. Probably, Clark was still at the office. Lois grabbed her purse, took her coat and quickly left her apartment.
***
"Clark, do you know where Lois is right now?" Perry White was bellowing from the entrance of his office.
Clark was sipping a cup of coffee at his own desk. "No, Sir, I have no idea at all."
Perry had had the feeling during the afternoon that something had changed between his two top reporters, so he had headed to Clark's desk. A big boss had to be sure that nothing would alter the quality of their work. If there was a problem growing between them, he had to know what it was all about now.
"I just wanted to congratulate Lois for her article about that stuff with the mayor. She did a fantastic job once again. It's another page one article."
"Sure, she did a good job."
"I must say, I've been quite surprised you didn't share the byline with her. Does it mean you weren't working together on that story?"
"You got it, Sir."
"Clark, is everything all right? You don't seem to be very talkative. Is there anything wrong with Lois?"
"Absolutely nothing."
"Of course, you would let me know if a problem was about to explode between the two of you…?"
"Sure, Sir. Really, there is nothing for you to be worried about."
"Okay. You should go back home, Clark. You do look like a tired man, son."
"Thanks, I'll take the advice. See you tomorrow."
"Bye Clark."
***
"Hey Jimmy!" shouted Lois when she saw that Clark was no longer at the office. "Have you seen Clark? I'm surprised he's not here. It's not so late for him to have already left the office."
"Well, C.K. went home quite early today. In fact, Clark seemed exhausted."
"Exhausted? Clark is never exhausted…" *And, how could he be exhausted?* she added to herself.
"Today he certainly looked like it," Jimmy answered. "I have never seen him looking so depressed. Poor C.K. He wandered the whole afternoon, showing a quite forlorn appearance. And when I asked him what was worrying him, he just answered me: 'Women…'. Lois, tell me, could you be the reason for all his despair?"
"Jimmy!"
"Okay, don't tell me. I'm probably sticking my nose into something that doesn't concern me at all, except that is, if our C.K gets back to normal."
"He sure will, I tell you."
"Good. See you soon."
But Lois had already left the conference room in which she had found Jimmy. *Clark is depressed!* She could not stand the idea of her Clark feeling abandoned because of her stupid selfishness. She ran back to the elevator she had just vacated a couple of minutes ago. All was settled by now: she definitely knew what she had to do to get back her ex-future lover…
***
Channel 7 was broadcasting a match of his favorite football team, and still, Clark was watching it without even trying to concentrate on the game. All sorts of gloomy thoughts were running through his mind. When he had realized that Lois had left the office quite early this afternoon, he had had the impression that all his world was collapsing in a huge black hole. *She doesn't want to see me any longer… I knew it would not be a good idea to tell her anything and yet I did it! Well done, Clark. You are a very clever guy…*
Somehow, something was telling him that he had taken the right decision to reveal his secret to Lois. Clark also knew the manner had not been very gallant. *I shouldn't have lost my nerve. She must be furious with me. Surely, I lost every chance for her to fall in love with me…* But Clark did not want his relationship with Lois be so false: how could love win when mixed in such a dubious behaviour? He could not lie any longer to the woman he was in love with. Even if everything was over, Clark was now feeling clearer.
But what was he going to do now? Certainly, Lois would not want to go on working with her ex-partner. And she had made it clear this afternoon that she would not accept Clark working in her neighborhood. So what other solution was there but to leave Metropolis? Clark got up from the couch and started packing some stuff.
A few minutes later, Clark heard someone knocking at the door. His heart started beating faster. Could it be Lois coming for an explanation? It it was, he was certainly going to have a hard time…
Clark opened the door. Yes, Lois was standing in the entrance, an uneasy look on her face.
"Hi, Lois, I… " Clark could not think of something else to say.
"Hi, Clark… May I come in?"
"Sure, I was just surprised to see you. Please come in and relax. Would you like a drink? Maybe a cup of tea?"
"No, thank you."
Suddenly, Lois saw the packing Clark was doing.
"Clark! What is all that packed stuff for? Were you planning to leave me without even saying goodbye to me? Really, I think we have a lot to talk about…"
"Yeah, we sure have a lot to talk about. I wasn't really sure you would like us to do that. In fact, I was so frightened you would not want to talk to me any longer. Really, it's a great weight off my mind to see you here, even if I'm totally aware you're probably quite upset with me…"
Lois saw that Clark was feeling uneasy and was trying to hide it by a lot of talking. Still, she could not help answering:
"You have no idea how much, Clark Kent! I thought I was going crazy this afternoon with all the ideas that made my blood boil. It's been such a shock for me. I had absolutely no idea that you're Superman."
"I must say I'm quite satisfied and proud of the very ingenious system I used to disguise myself as a Superhero." Clark answered, grinning a little bit while lightly touching his glasses.
"Clark, don't be so self-satisfied! You should be ashamed of what you did to me," Lois yelled back. "And you probably thought I was so stupid not to have guessed anything…"
"Never, Lois. And I will never have that kind of opinion of you. You know, you never found out about me because you had absolutely no clue to guide you into that direction. And people tend to see only what they want to see."
Lois remained silent. Clark was trying to cheer her up. It could only mean he wasn't totally angry with her.
"I've never intended to offend you in any case, Lois," Clark went on. "Well, you know, when I arrived in Metropolis and decided that all the powers I have could be useful to help people in situations of emergency, I had no choice but use a suit that would prevent me from being recognized everywhere by everyone. It was the only way for me to go on living as a normal man. Of course, at the beginning of our relationship, it was totally impossible for me to reveal to you my dual identity just because we weren't close enough."
Clark saw a shadow passing over Lois' face.
"Oh, Clark, I do remember how badly I treated you when you first arrived at the Daily Planet. I was so closed to any kind of relationship with my colleagues. I'm ashamed of what I did and I do understand you didn't trust me enough to tell me your secret, but when we got closer, why did you go on keeping it for yourself?"
Lois was looking Clark straight in the eyes. She knew what was going to be the answer and she also knew she owed Clark the right to tell her how much her crush on Superman had disappointed him.
"Lois, we eventually became best friends but you never seemed interested in taking another step with me, even though you were so attracted to your Superman! You have no idea how much I've been hurt by your attitude."
Clark got up from the couch he was seated on and began pacing in the room.
"Lois, I love you so much. You know I did the very moment I saw you. And I just wanted you to share the same feelings for me, Clark, not Superman. I desperately wanted you to love me as a normal guy… but you never did."
"But Clark, I do!" Lois got up as well from the couch and grabbed Clark's hands.
"Yes, Clark, I do love you," Lois insisted. "Okay, I've never told you yet," she added when she saw Clark's doubtful face.
Lois gazed intently at Clark and went on.
"This feeling I was starting to have for you was so new to me I got scared. I had sworn I would never get involved with anyone else anymore. It took me some time to admit I couldn't deny the deep feeling I had for you any longer, Clark."
Clark couldn't believe what he was hearing: Lois was in love with him! But the shadow of the superhero he had built and competed with for Lois' love was still there.
"But Lois, you are still so attracted to Superman," answered Clark.
"Yes, Clark, I've always been and always be. But I realized that Superman was nothing else but a fantasy, my fantasy. Probably because of my own fear of being involved with someone real. I knew I would never be disappointed with Superman. Quite unlike with you, a relationship with him could only be a fantasy."
Lois rose up to reach Clark's lips and very gently kissed them.
"Clark, I've never meant to hurt you in any case. Okay, it's true that I had and still have a crush for Superman, but I'm sure you can understand that a girl can't help but be attracted to such a strong and extremely sexy man! Not long ago did I realize Superman would lead me nowhere: he is not real."
Lois was now running her hand through Clark's hair.
"Clark, please, do believe me when I tell you I'm in love with you. In fact, I've never opened my heart so sincerely to anyone in all my life. Clark, please, believe me!"
That was new! Lois begging for him to trust her. Clark was tempted to do so. But still, he just could not forget how Lois had ignored him this very morning when she arrived at the office.
"Lois, I'd like so much to believe you, but I just can't understand why you refused the help I offered you this morning for the story you were on. If you love me so much, you certainly would have wanted me to go with you to visit the mayor?"
"Oh Clark, I know how you must feel about me. Once again, I got too involved with my work and lost the poor sensibility I have and hurt you deeply. I do regret what I did this morning. Of course, I should have let you come with me. But you must understand I had the feeling I was on a very big story, and I wanted that damned Pulitzer so much I got selfish about the final byline. I only hope you will forgive me for something that is finally just a professionnal fault. It has absolutely no link with what can be the two of us."
Their lips met once again, and when they parted, Lois murmured in Clark's ear:
"I do love you, Clark Kent. Please, trust me. I promise I will think as a couple now, and you won't have to be hurt anymore by my selfishness."
Clark gently put his finger on her lips.
"Shushh, Lois, don't talk anymore. I do believe you. And I'm sure the love we share will now remain very present in our souls, just to remind us of how long we had to wait for it to tie us for life."
A tear was now running down his face.
"Clark, you're so sensitive. That is so rare for a man. God, do I deserve you?"
Lois started crying as well, so Clark wiped her tears with his finger with all the tenderness she had always known he would be capable of. He was also caressing her cheek with his other hand.
"So many emotions are making me feel weak. Clark, I'm so scared and so happy at the same time. Please tell me this is not just a dream, this very dream I've had so often lately."
"No Lois, you're in my arms and you will be able to stay there as long as you feel like it. I will always be there to protect you with all my love and my soul."
Lois then rested her head on Clark's chest.
"And I will always love you, Clark."
"Moi aussi, mon amour, pour la vie…"**
THE END
**(Me too, my love, for life…)
Please, remenber to be quite lenient towards my English. I know this story is quite sentimental, but I wanted this story written by a French man ake American women forget about Claude's behaviour. We French guys, can be very sentimental as well…